Chapter Text
“Will you come out tonight?”
Dani spares her roommate a glance from where she is hunched over the coffee table. From the opposite end of the sofa Robin’s wide green eyes bore into Dani. Her roommate's light brown hair is immaculately styled, short at the sides, longer on the top. Robin's already ready to leave, dressed in her loose jeans and some unreadable band T-shirt. Dani chews at the chapped skin of her bottom lip and considers.
“I don't know. You know what I'm like.”
Introverted. A homebody. Closeted.
“It'll be fun, let loose a little on a Friday night! And it's not just any drag show, it's all drag Kings. You'll like it, trust me.” Robin smirks.
Dani rolls her eyes. “What does that even mean?”
“You know exactly what I mean. Also it's emo night. Please Dani?”
“Ugh, I hate that that sounds kind of fun. I can't make it through sober, you know.”
“Sure, whatever, just come anyway.”
“Is Melissa coming?”
“Yeah, she's meeting us there.”
Dani suppresses a wince. With Robin's girlfriend coming Dani will surely have to fend for herself at some point, instead of clinging to Robin's side like a social liferaft.
“Oh, lovely!” Dani exclaims, forcing some gentle enthusiasm. Melissa is nice. It's socially awkward Dani that's the problem.
“You'll be fine! So you're coming?”
Dani sighs, downing the rest of her cheap red wine. She gets up and resigns to her fate. She messes with her loose shoulder-length curls for a few minutes in the bathroom mirror, raking mousse through it with her long fingers, and smudges black eyeliner on her eyelids. She pulls at a loose thread at the rip in her black skinny jeans, and pushes the sleeves of her favourite striped black and white sweater to her elbows.
“You ready?” Robin calls from the front door.
“As ready as I'll ever be.”
Dani pulls on her black shoes with too many zippers and they head out.
No going back now.
Music from the bar can be heard from the street and people filter in and out. A few patrons and drag artists are smoking to the sides of the entrance, heavy makeup and costumes visible even under the dim glow of the street lights. Dan follows Robin closely, fiddling with the hem of her sweater nervously.
They pay inside the entrance and follow the music into the main floor. To the right is the long bar counter, with a large rainbow pride flag hung up between the bottles lining the wall and people are crowded in, ordering drinks. Next to the bar there are a few rows of chairs, mostly filled and a small stage to the back.
Robin leans in close to Dani's ear to speak over the music. “I'm going to the bar, can you grab us some seats”
“Sure.”
“Gin and Tonic?”
“Yeah.”
The bar is filling with people now and Dani hurries to the last two seats at the back. She pulls the sleeves of her sweater over her hands and takes a few deep breaths. Someone on stage warns of the show starting in 5 minutes. She tells someone, quite awkwardly, that the seat next to her is taken. Finally Robin comes back over with their drinks and Dani thanks her, taking a generous sip.
The music fades out as a drag king takes the stage, thanking everyone for coming and introducing the first act. Dani sits by the middle aisle and watches in awe.
The drag king mouths along to My Chemical Romance and gives a very dramatic performance to I’m Not Okay (I Promise). Everyone is getting into the mid-00s throwback and there's something magical about it all. The king makes his way down the aisle and people are handing over cash tips.
Dani feels like she should have brought something and flushes as the performer gets close. She glances over at Robin who's just smiling and she smiles back because yeah, she thinks she could get into this after all.
The host comes back out to thank the performer and introduces the next act, which Dani can hardly hear over the cheering of the crowd. Then a performer steps on stage and sits on a stool facing the back of the stage and Dani is staring at the back of their short jet black hair.
A distorted riff rings out and Dani knows this song well, because then the first verse starts, the king leaps from the chair. The crowd cheers and he starts swaying, dancing around the stage dramatically and mouthing along to the lyrics, the building pre-chorus. Dani feels like the King on stage is singing to her, even though his eyes are half-hidden behind a black fringe and tilted toward the ceiling.
And just as Dani is reminded of her time spent in her childhood bedroom, headphones blasting, tears running down her face, feeling like she’ll never overcome the feeling of being too strange to be normal, the chorus rings out and the king rushes down the aisle.
And our time is running out /Our time is running out /You can’t push it underground /You can’t stop it screaming out
Dani feels a shiver run up and down her arms. The king barely pays any mind to anyone in the audience, staring seemingly over and across the crowd and nearly missing some tips waved his way. He’s spinning and throwing his arms up and his eyes are closed for a moment before walking back down to the stage.
He’s just as passionate and in his element on stage, swaying and grabbing the microphone like he’ll sing for real. He looks down as the song ends and the black fringe falls over his forehead, hiding his eyes. Then he walks off as the crowd cheers again.
There’s a buzzing in Dani’s ears for a moment. She turns to face Robin but her roommate has her phone out and looks up, beaming and waving over Dani's shoulder. Dani whips her head around to Melissa walking up. "Hey Melissa." Dani gets up and gestures to her seat.
“Hi! Oh no, Dani, please, don't, I can stand.”
“It's okay! I just need some air.” Dani hurriedly replies, “I'll be back in a bit”
Dani downs the rest of her drink and places it on the end of the bar counter before heading outside. There's a couple groups smoking and chatting to the right and left of the main doors, nowhere to be alone exactly.
She moves around the group to her right until she's more in the dark and breathes deeply, trying to ignore the smell of smoke.
“Hey, I haven't seen you around before.”
Dani turns to the person next to her, their bright white teeth and dark skin glowing in the streetlight, exuding confidence and ease in tight clothes and glittering eyeshadow. They stand next to a king with a ghostly pale painted face and dark eye makeup.
“I'm Tai, they/them. This is Eli Sunders, he’s our haunted Drag Father extraordinaire”
Dani huffs out a laugh “Dani.”
“So, am I right? First time here?”
“Yeah, actually.”
“Oh my God no way!” Tai claps their hands together enthusiastically
Dani blushes, feeling a little exposed. But Eli sends her a warm smile and welcome, and she feels the tension in her shoulders melt a little.
Then, someone steps up beside Eli, and the noise from the pavement draws her eyes to the small rolling luggage in their hands, then tight black skinny jeans, a familiar red and black plaid shirt before Dani looks up to see the King who performed to Muse, hair falling over their forehead.
“Hey Phil, off already?” asks Eli.
“Yeah, you know me. But I’ll see you Thursday?”
“You know it!”
Phil hugs Eli and then Tai and then their eyes shift to Dani, who's obviously staring, and embarrassed, she quickly looks away.
Tai speaks for her, “Oh, this is Dani!”
Phil flashes her a toothy grin and sticks out a hand toward her.
“Phil. She/her. He/him on stage though.”
Dani takes her hand as their eyes meet again and despite Dani’s nearly 6 foot height Phil stands almost level with her. Her eyes shine, almost gray in the low light outside the bar. Phil's high cheekbones and angled jaw are accentuated with sharp contouring meant for the stage. Her hair is so perfect it looks like a wig. Maybe it is a wig?
Dani lets in a quiet breath as the silence between them stretches. Her mind blanks, surely just a side effect of the alcohol, and then Phil pulls her hand away and brings it up to cover her mouth as she chuckles, casting her eyes down.
Phil turns again to Eli, “Well, see you next week then.” And with that, the spell is broken and Phil’s long legs carry her quickly down the road.
Dani takes a breath in as she watches her walk away.
“Dani?”
Dani coughs, shifting and turning back to Tai and Eli. “Sorry, what?”
Tai smirks, eyes glinting mischievously. “You okay?”
Dani straightens up slightly. “Yeah, I'm good.”
Eli smiles kindly. “Are you enjoying the show?”
“Oh, yeah. From what I've seen so far.”
He chuckles, shoving his hands in the deep pockets of his black jeans. “Won't see much from out here.”
She lets out a short polite laugh in return. “Yeah, that's okay. It's a bit crowded.”
“I get that. Actually, we have a show happening next Thursday, if you want to come check it out on a slower night. Still just as entertaining, I guarantee.” Eli flashes her a wide smile, and then pushes off the wall, and heads back inside.
Tai pulls a cigarette from behind their ear and lights up. “So, you should definitely come next week then.”
“Oh?” Dani questions, “why’s that?”
“Phil will be performing again.” Tai says, flashing her that knowing grin again.
She feels the flush on her jaw spreading across her face. “Oh, no- no. I mean, actually, it’s not- like, I’m not..” Dani stutters out a denial as the smile on Tai’s face drops and they bring a hand up to her shoulder gently.
“Dani, it’s okay. Don’t worry, I’m just teasing. My big mouth and all. But come anyway. I’ll be there and I won't... If you’re not comfortable… I get it.”
She sighs. “Thanks Tai, I’ll consider it.”
They pull out their pack of smokes and tilt it towards her.
She shakes her head. “No thanks. I don’t- I’m really just out to get some air. I should head back in.”
“Okay, well nice to meet you, hopefully we’ll see you back soon!”
Dani nods and smiles, heading back in. She hangs around the back of the room, staying for another drink and a few more performances before saying goodbye to Robin and Melissa and calling a taxi to take her back home.
The flipping of Dani's stomach as she settles into bed shouldn't be blamed on the few drinks she's had but she tries. She tries to blame it all on the drinks even as she fails to push away the memory of shiny pale eyes, deep black hair and a soft hand lingering in her own.