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Kevin, Axel and Jakob stood close together, only moments away from getting on stage. All three friends were in good spirits, but Jakob especially was feeling great and excited about the gig. He was almost trembling with excitement, caught up in such intense positive emotion that, to him, came so naturally. After one last hug and some words of encouragement, Axel started walking towards the stage first, with brisk and confident steps. Shortly behind him was Kevin who just about radiated with quiet, grounding calmness. Jakob shoved the mostly eaten Elovena snack biscuit in his jacket pocket and was about to follow his friends.
Suddenly, a loud bang broke the peace. It almost sounded like a car backfiring, but also.. different. The sound kept echoing loudly in Jakob's ears during the seconds that followed.
I don't know how I even heard that over the excited crowd right outside..
he thought to himself as he hurried to the stage so that they could get the gig started, even taking a few running steps. He'd hate to keep all the people waiting.
Just as Jakob left the backstage area, he had the front row seat to something that might be tormenting him until the end of his life. Kevin going down right in front of him. At first, Jakob didn't understand what the reason behind it all was. Had Kevin tripped on something and lost his balance? Was he feeling weak and about to faint? Jakob tried to come up with some logical explanation as he picked up the pace a little more. Kevin had always had an admirable control of his long legs. They gave him a certain elegance that at times seemed to even defy gravity. Kevin just was so good at what he did, and it was one of the many reasons Jakob admired him greatly.
"Kevin? Are you alright?"
Jakob asked as he took the last few steps. He felt like he was moving incredibly slowly. Why was that?
"Give me your hand, let's get you back.. up..?"
Stopping right next to Kevin was when Jakob first saw it. Splashes of red on sparkly silver. The world around Jakob came to a stop as he rushed to get on his knees by Kevin's side. The persistent ringing in his ears and the tightness in his chest did nothing to ease his growing sense of panic.
"Axel..!"
Jakob called out, barely even sounding like himself.
"Call an ambulance, now!"
Axel didn't move. In fact, it seemed like he hadn't even heard one word from Jakob.
"Why.. Why is no one doing anything?! We need.. Kevin needs help!"
Kevin..
Jakob did his best to wrap his arms around his friend's upper body, pulling him closer. Cradling him, Jakob looked back up once more.
"Do something, Axel, anybody! Please!"
He couldn't believe it. Why didn't anyone care?
Jakob did the only thing he was capable of doing; he cradled Kevin in his arms. As he looked a little further down from Kevin's face, he saw how blood was seeping out of a gunshot wound in Kevin's chest.
He'd thought it was a car backfiring somewhere nearby. But it had been something else. How was it possible for anyone to smuggle in a gun? There was no way they would have been just allowed to walk in with it like it was nothing. The panic Jakob felt, wasted no time getting out of hand. Tears started flowing down his cheeks as he tried to both keep Kevin awake and try to control the bleeding.
"Kevin, Kevin listen to me, please..! You're going to be okay, you have to be..!"
Jakob almost screamed, sounding nearly animalistic as his hysteria grew even further. He didn't have his phone on him, and he didn't want to leave Kevin.
Jakob's hands were quickly stained red as he fought to keep Kevin alive. But despite his very best efforts, Jakob understood that it might not be enough. He searched for Kevin's pulse but could barely even feel it. That wasn't supposed to be happening. None of this was, not to them. Kevin was one of his best friends, they'd been together for much longer than they'd been apart. How could Jakob carry on with his life without Kevin in it?
"Don't leave me, Kev.."
Jakob begged, his voice shaky and weak. Helpless and broken, all he could do was be on his knees on stage. He had looked forward to yet another gig with his favorite people right by his side. But now.. Everything was changing, forever.
What was he to do now?
As Jakob opened his eyes, the room was quiet and dark. His heart was still beating way faster than it should have, his chest still felt tight. He was bathed in cold sweat. Everything around him was too quiet. Pushing himself to sit up, Jakob started looking around frantically. He was in bed, and there was someone next to him. Someone lying perfectly still. Too still. As Jakob's eyes got used to the soft darkness, he was able to recognize the person sharing the bed with him.
It was Kevin.
Jakob's still panicked brain was immediately trying to pull him back, doing a scarily good job at convincing him about his nightmare being real.. Making him believe that he was sleeping next to a dead Kevin.
Jakob's heart nearly jumped to his throat as he got on his knees and hovered over Kevin's unmoving form.
"Kevin..? Kevin, wake up,"
Jakob begged in panicked whispers. But Kevin remained unmoving, with his back turned.
"Kevin..! Come on!"
Jakob took a desperate, shaky hold of Kevin's shoulder and started shaking it.
"Please.. You can't be dead!"
Jakob didn't even realize how he was nearly yelling and losing his composure. Likewise, he failed to react to the quiet shuffling of the sheets.
"Jakob? Is everything okay?"
Axel's familiar, calm voice asked as he got up from his bed. There were only two of them in the hotel room. In the end, Kevin and Jakob had ended up sharing a bed after a few rounds of rock-paper-scissors.
Jakob gasped as he heard Axel speaking to him.
"Kev.. Kevin's not waking up.."
Jakob cried out. He could feel just how wet his cheeks were.
"Tell me.. Is he dead? He can't.. He can't be..! Kevin, please!"
Jakob shook his friend once more.
"Dead..? Jakob, Kevin is alright,"
Axel did his best to explain calmly after he had sat down on the edge of Kevin and Jakob's bed.
"He must just be exhausted. We've all had a long, tiring day. What makes you think he's dead?"
He kept his voice quiet enough. Jakob was still trembling as he tried (and failed) to calm down.
"I saw it happen..! We.. We were on stage, we were there for a gig, and.. I saw Kevin just fall right in front of me! I tried to yell at you so you'd call for help, but.. But you didn't care. Why didn't you care?! I held onto Kevin as he bled out. He died in my arms and I couldn't do anything to save him.."
Jakob's breathing was getting way too fast and shallow, so Axel moved a little closer to him.
"Jakob? Jakob, listen to me.."
he requested and succeeded in getting Jakob's attention. Jakob did his best to look directly at Axel, his eyes wide and still glistening with panic.
"I think you were having a nightmare. There is nothing wrong with Kevin, I promise you. But, if you think it'll help you feel better, we can wake him up so you'll see for yourself."
"Please.."
Jakob begged, feeling scared and pathetic.
A few minutes later all three friends were sitting on the bed with Jakob safely sandwiched between Kevin and Axel. Upon waking up, Kevin had been confused at first, but Axel had done a good job explaining everything to him. Jakob on the other hand had done his best to calm down. Axel had been right, he knew that now. It had just been a nightmare and Kevin had never been in any real danger. Still, it was difficult for Jakob to relax after having felt convinced that he had just seen one of his best friends die in his arms.
"Jakob? There's nothing wrong with me,"
Kevin also said softly after Axel had moved back to his own bed, wanting to give the others some space to breathe. Jakob had possibly never been as happy to hear Kevin's voice as he was now. He kept holding onto Kevin's hand almost desperately, with an iron grip. And Kevin let him. Anything to help Jakob truly come to the conclusion that everything was alright.
It was understandable that Jakob didn't want to fall asleep again after the nightmare. He had, however, eventually agreed to at least lie back down with Kevin. And so, they had turned off the little desk lamp and settled down on the bed, side by side. Jakob didn't really want to keep talking about it anymore, either, so both him and Kevin were fine just lying down. And, no matter how hard Jakob fought to stay awake, after enough time his body just decided for him.
"Tell me you'll still be here when I wake up.."
he mumbled and was out like a light before he had a chance to hear Kevin's response.
"I'll be here.."
he promised softly, leaning a little closer to Jakob who was still clinging onto him tightly.
"You don't have to worry."