Chapter Text
September 19th, 1988
It was that time of year again for the Cranium Command; boot camp was in full swing.
Late by half an hour yet again, Buzzy staggered over to the hill where the morning’s training was taking place, covered in ketchup, fruit juice and runny eggs.
“HOW NOW FUZZY, LATE AGAIN?!?!”The General began furiously, before suddenly stopping to take a good look at the dirty commando. That was all it took for him to burst into hysterical laughter.
“OH NO, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?! WHY ARE YOU ALL COVERED IN CATSUP, BOY?!?!” He choked out through his fit.
“Uh…I said good morning to someone from the other platoon, sir. She didn’t take it well, that’s all. I just wanted to be nice, I didn’t mean to make her mad…” Buzzy muttered.
“Making friends, are we? That’s not very professional, NOW IS IT?!?!” He thundered.
“SIR! MAYBE NOT, SIR!” Buzzy stiffened up.
“CORRECT!!! All you need in this ‘ere job is you, yourself, your body crew, and to be CALM, COOL COLLECTED, SERENE, BALANCED, CENTERED AND RELAXED!!! NOW UP THAT HILL YOU GO, BEFORE I SCRAMBLE YOUR BRAINS WORSE THAN THAT EGG ON YOUR HEAD!!!”
“YES SIR!!!” He shouted, before rushing up the hill as fast as his legs could carry him.
Upon making it to the top, he came face to face with his fellow comrades, who immediately grimaced down at the sight of him without even saying hello.
“Woah, you’re filthy!” Sito immediately pointed out the obvious.
“I know. It’s my own fault, some members aren’t as friendly as others.” He sighed.
“Geez, someone did that to you? What did you do to piss ‘em off that bad?” Burton asked.
“I said good morning.” He hung his head and tried to drown out the laughter, pulling out a notebook and pen.
“When you don’t like someone, you start a FOOD FIGHT.” He took note of the situation for future reference, highlighting the last two words. That’d definitely come in handy once he boarded his first craft.
He looked up again to see none other than the perpetrator of the ketchup attack coming up the hill as the other squadron began the same task, panic coursing through his veins.
“Is that her?” Trousdale could immediately tell by the look on his face.
“Yeah, look at what’s in her pocket.” Burton pointed out; it was none other than a bottle of ketchup, dawned like a weapon.
They watched as she wandered off to the side, falling first in line effortlessly as she ominously and blankly stared into nothingness.
“What is it with HQ and recruitin’ all these weirdos who think they’re too good for the rest of us? I’m gonna go talk to her, maybe she just doesn’t like you.” Sito playfully told Buzzy, making her way over to the other recruit.
“I-I don’t think she wants to be friends with anyone...Sito…” He nervously reached out a hand to stop her, yet to no avail.
“Hey, you! I always see you ‘round here, what’s your deal anyway?” Sito called out to her, grabbing the other commando’s shoulder the second she got was close enough.
The second she turned around, the men saw Sito’s entire body tense up in one shot. They couldn’t see the other woman’s face due to their friend’s height blocking it, yet her cryptic body language as they exchanged words was enough to let everyone know that something was up.
The brunette came back with her head slightly down, her hat covering her eyes and preventing the others from being able to pinpoint a clear emotion from her straightened mouth alone. Unusually quiet, she retreated back to her place without a single word and just stood there, unmoving.
“What was that?! Was she really that scary?!” Buzzy immediately whispered to her, unable to contain his curiosity for another second.
“Don’t worry about it.” Her voice shook slightly as she pulled her hat down further to hide the rest of her face, visibly flushed.
“Don’t tell me…” Burton’s eyes widened as a playful smirk crept onto his face.
“Leave it alone.” She spat, indirectly confirming his assumptions as she accidentally shuffled to reveal the small smile on her own face.
“The General’s gonna flip if you try getting any closer to her, he’s totally gonna kick you out.” He teased.
“Don’t hold your breath.” She retorted, elbowing him hard.
Their chatter ceased the second General Knowledge made his way up the hill on none other than his favorite tank, sipping on a margarita to rub salt in the wound.
“Alright you pinheads, you’ve completed this course alright! Now, it’s time for- CHUZZY!!! FIX YOUR UNIFORM THIS INSTANT, YOU LOOK LIKE A CLOWN!!!” He abruptly stopped his directions to aggressively jab a finger into Buzzy’s chest.
“My uniform?!” Buzzy was taken aback, looking over his jacket and pants. “What’s wrong with it, sir? Aside from the food...”
“Oh, your hat’s gone.” Trousdale pointed it out before the General could.
Buzzy immediately reached up to feel his hat, only for his hand to make direct contact with his head.
“What, huh?! W-Where’d it go?!” He cried.
“You better find that thing, PRONTO!!! Or else you get one less mystery meat at dinner!” The General snapped.
“Oh, well that’s actually a privilege…” He whispered to himself.
“SILENCE, GIVE ME 50 FOR WHATEVER IT WAS THAT YOU JUST SAID THAT I DIDN’T HEAR!!!” General Knowledge bellowed.
Upon dropping to the floor, Buzzy heard Trousdale gasp as the other platoon started walking away.
“Dude, look!” He whispered.
Buzzy briefly looked up to see none other than the infamous commando, discreetly slipping his hat into her bag.
She looked back at him, smirked, and turned back around.
“Ohhh, that little…!” Burton grumbled.
“Ohhh, that’s it! Sittin’ pretty or not, I don’t care! If she wants a fight, she’s gonna get one!” Sito glared, balling her fists.
“G-Guys…don’t worry, let it go. Trust me, I really don’t want that meat anyways, I-“ Buzzy got to his feet, only for Trousdale to put a finger in front of his lips.
“Don’t. Let us handle this for you.” He stared into the distance dramatically, visibly ready to start something.
“Please don’t…” He tried to insist, to no avail.
“Oh, we will. Tonight, we break in to the other platoon’s cabin. We’re taking that hat back and MAYBE drawing on her face.” Burton whispered.
“C’mon Buzzy, you’ve gotta join us! It’s not like we’re hurting her or anything, it’s all in good fun.” Sito egged him on.
“…Oh, okay.” He sighed, bending over backwards under the pressure of the others looking at him.
Sito pumped her fists, and Trousdale and Burton nodded at each other in agreement; things were about to go DOWN.