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John made his way down the hall towards his quarters. It'd been a long day, and he was eager for bed and a few pages of his book. This was becoming his favorite time of night. The bustle of the City was dying down, work done for the day. It was transforming from where they worked to where they lived.
As he neared an alcove, he heard Sergeant Tanaka speaking.
“-hot.”
His curiosity was piqued. Who were they talking about? The Expedition had an abnormal number of beautiful women.
“She's got nice tits,” Lieutenant King added.
“She's definitely fuckable. Who hasn't imagined bending her over that desk? She just isn't hot.”
John stopped just before the doorway, frowning. This was going beyond basic admiration of beauty. He didn't mind a little guy talk but he never crossed the line into such disrespect.
Okay, almost never.
“Glass walls, dude.”
He suddenly felt sick to his stomach as he realised who they were talking about. It was quickly followed by rage.
“Even better,” Tanaka laughed.
He heard the sound of boots, and a moment later they appeared.
“Major Sheppard,” they greeted with a nod as they headed down the hall.
John took a deep, cleansing breath and continued to his room. Once there, he did not pick up War and Peace. Instead, he turned on his tablet and made a few adjustments to the duty rosters.
“Major Sheppard?” Doctor Weir called the next day as he passed the walkway to her office.
“Good morning,” he greeted.
That caused her to give him a brief smile. “Right. Good morning. I got your message about taking Tanaka off AR-4 and King off AR-5, but I didn't see what teams you're reassigning them to?”
“Because I'm not assigning them to any,” he said casually.
She looked down at her laptop. “I'm confused. I thought they were two of the best?”
“That's a matter of opinion.”
“Their records are pristine,” she pushed.
“That's not always the best thing to go by, now is it?” he asked pointedly.
She briefly looked down as she realised her faux pas. “No. Sorry. Is there something I'm missing?”
“No. I'm just…exercising my right as the new military commander of this Expedition,” he said firmly.
He knew he should explain but the thought of doing so made him sick. Having to repeat what he'd overheard? To her face? No. He wouldn't do that to her.
She raised her eyebrows, but nodded. “Fine. You can go.”
He felt a stab of guilt at ruining her mood. Her words were obviously her exercising her right as the leader of all of them. Still, he noted that she respected him enough not to override his decision. And that meant everything.
“What the hell did you do?” Tanaka yelled, stepping into John's way. King was with him.
Several people stopped, surprised at the sudden hallway confrontation, but then continued to their tasks at John's glare.
“That's ‘what the hell did you do,’ Sir,” John replied.
King's slight sneer set John on edge, but he took a deep breath and fought the urge to sneer back. He was in charge.
“You took our commands?” Tanaka demanded.
“I did,” John said calmly.
“You can't do that! We were picked by Colonel Sumner himself.”
“Colonel Sumner isn't here,” John said, guilt making his chest ache. It was his fault Sumner wasn't here.
But a tiny part of him knew Sumner wouldn't have done what he was doing. Hell, Sumner probably would have laughed along with them.
“Why?” King demanded.
“I heard your little conversation last night.”
King rolled his eyes. “That was just guy talk.”
“Guy talk doesn't involve imagining bending your boss over a desk. It was disgusting and degrading,” he growled.
“She's not my boss,” Tanaka claimed. “Everyone knows you should be in charge.”
“You're one of us. Where's the loyalty?” King asked, disgustedly.
Loyalty? To those who had banished him to Antarctica for doing the right thing? To the people here who had treated him like shit because of an incident they didn't even know the details of? John clenched his fists and slowly, painfully unclenched them. He stepped right up into their faces. “I have loyalty. To this Expedition. You seem to forget: I'm not here because of Colonel Sumner. I'm here because of Doctor Weir. Who is your boss. And spread the word…if I ever get a whisper of that kind of talk again…I will find who said it, and they will never set foot outside these walls again. Am. I. Clear?”
“Yes, Sir,” Tanaka said stiffly.
“Yes, Sir,” King repeated.
“Good. Dismissed.”
Tanaka and King hurried off, and John took another deep breath and tried to calm down.
He was in his quarters reading when there was a knock. When he answered, Doctor Weir was waiting.
“What's wrong?” he asked.
“Good evening,” she greeted with a small mischievous smile.
“Good evening,” he replied, returning the smile. “To what do I owe this visit?”
“Walk with me?” She asked, tilting her head.
Confused, he grabbed a hoodie.
She was silent as they moved through the halls. His anxiety grew as he sensed he shouldn't be the one to break the silence. They ended up on the balcony off the control room.
“You remember the last time we were out here didn't exactly go well?” He reminded her hesitantly.
She wrapped her arms around herself and leaned against a pillar. “I think we've both grown since then, don't you?”
‘Since then’ was about a week, but he agreed and joined her.
“One time I walked into some negotiations and someone said they were delighted that entertainment was provided. He thought I was a stripper,” she said casually, breaking the silence that had gone on for several minutes.
John closed his eyes and quietly swore. “You heard.”
“Oh, your encounter has spread like wildfire. Another time, a world leader told me he didn't hear a word I was saying because he was mesmerized by my ‘blow job lips’.”
“Jesus!” he exclaimed, appalled.
She turned to him, still hugging herself. “I've had a lot said to me in my career. I've heard a lot said about me. I have very, very thick skin.”
“Thick skin is just scar tissue,” he replied quietly. He knew from his own experiences having to endure shit.
She looked away for a few moments. “I'm saying, Major, I can take care of myself. It undermines my leadership for a man, for anyone, to come to my rescue.”
John nodded. “I hear what you are saying. Now please hear me?”
She raised her eyebrows, acknowledging his turning her words from their fight against her. He smiled slightly, and she rolled her eyes, a smile on her lips as she turned to look out at the dark ocean.
“I didn't do what I did because you're a woman, okay? The safety and security of this Expedition is my job.”
“I fail to see how-”
“Let me finish. Please?” She nodded. “If they're saying that crap about you, do you think they stop there? What if they say that about someone who doesn't have your experience?”
“I think you'll find the women of this Expedition-”
“This isn't about gender,” he said, raising his voice slightly, frustrated. She whipped around, her eyes narrowed.
He raised his hand in a placating motion and ran a hand through his hair.
“Then what's it about? I'm listening,” she replied, clasping her hands in front of her. Her fingers were folded except for her thumbs and index fingers. They were pointed. He had seen her make the gesture before.
He took a moment to gather his thoughts and then spoke. “We are all dependent on each other out here. We need to trust. And that can't happen with people saying shit like that about others. It's about knowing that every other person respects you and has your back. I was firm with Tanaka and King because I needed to let it be known that this kind of behaviour won't be tolerated. And before you say you don't mind if it's about you, or talk more about your experience-”
“Go on,” she urged quietly.
He was confused because in his life he'd been just as guilty of disrespect as Tanaka and King. No, not as graphic, but on the line. For some reason though, it had never occurred to him to do so with her. Not because she wasn't attractive or his type. She definitely was! But because…
“It's about me shielding you, not rescuing you. Not because you're a woman, but because you worked your ass off to build this. Every day you're wrangling personnel, making sure we have enough to eat, enough power, making sure McKay's ego doesn't kill us all, making sure we all don't kill McKay. Your job is to lead us and my job as your second in command is to let you be able to lead without having to make your skin thicker because of some assholes. Okay? Please let me do my job.”
She looked away, her expression unreadable. After a moment, she nodded. ‘I didn't realise you interpreted your job description so differently.
He let out a breath. “We both know my unconventionalism is part of why you picked me.”
She chuckled and looked back out at the water, resting her arms on the rail. After a moment, he did the same.