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Loving You Is My Heaven

Summary:

Mike is having a gay crisis, makes an impromptu visit to Will and realizes his feelings mid-conversation.

Or

Author speedruns Mike's identity crisis in 2,200 words.

*Rated teens and up for some cursing and (responsible) drinking

Notes:

This is canon-compliant and takes place around 1993-94 with Mike and Will in college, I got the idea while listening to late 80s music and felt compelled to write it. I had fun writing this one, hope you enjoy it! :3

Work Text:

Music flows from beneath the door of the club, a bright yellow sign illuminating the rain-covered sidewalk. Cold droplets fall against Mike Wheeler’s face, a relief against his skin, hot from running the few blocks from the bus stop. He stood there for a moment, trying to catch his breath and calm his nerves before taking a step inside.

 

He had driven out to New York City from his university in Boston, a road trip he took every first Saturday of the month to visit Will. Today was Friday. He hasn’t visited in over two months, on account of him and Will both having finals in almost every class at once, which Mike is sure was intended to set him up for failure, he’d been studying for hours a day for two weeks straight until his brain hurt. This visit was unplanned. It’d been the longest the two boys had been apart since California, yet Mike swore his heart somehow ached even more now than it had then. He doesn’t know why it hurt so much, being apart, but after he’d gotten through the stress of finals he felt that empty hole in his chest, burning through his ribs. He felt pulled to go back to Will, as if they were magnetically linked somehow. 

 

It wasn’t a new feeling entirely, it was familiar really, always there after Will left his house after a D&D campaign or when Mike went on vacation and couldn’t see him for a few days. But it was different now, more intense, more than just missing his friend. Being apart felt painful, almost devastatingly so in a way he couldn’t quite understand. He just knew he needed to see Will. 

 

So when he came back to his apartment that day, he packed up a bag complete with a few days worth of clothes, climbed into his shitty car handed down from Nancy, and started the four hour drive to New York. He’d thought about turning back at least a dozen times, it was a rash decision, he hadn’t even called Will to let him know he was coming. He didn’t even know what he’d say, what he wanted to do when he got there. He’d never let himself think about why he felt this almost instinctual pull towards Will. On the hours-long drive though, it was all he could think about, no matter how hard he tried to push it down. He wanted to spend all his time with Will, to hug him all the time, and tell him how much he cared for him, and make that gorgeous smile appear on his face. Was this a normal thing to feel for a friend? No, was the first answer his mind had supplied, but he decided best-friendship must have different rules, this was the way he’d always felt for Will so it must be normal.

 

That had still been a satisfying enough rationalization, when he parked his car, and walked into the building to Will’s apartment. When he’d gotten there however, heart plummeting when the door opened only to reveal Will’s roommate who told him Will was at a dance club, Mike getting into his car and driving until his car ran out of gas and he had to pull over and hop on a bus instead, it really started to set in how crazy this was. This was decidedly not the lengths a normal person goes to see their friend, best friend or not.

 

But all that’s going through Mike’s mind as he opens the door to the club, is the image of Will dancing at a club, Will, his best friend, dancing with some guy, flirting with him; and his chest is tightening with fiery green envy, and he doesn’t care anymore about how he’s supposed to feel or what anyone else might think. He steps in, closing the door behind him, suddenly feeling very out of place in his heavy coat and button-down shirt. Mike silently curses himself for not changing out of his stupid law school clothes, unbuttoning the first couple buttons to make it at least a little more casual. He scans for Will in the chaotic visual of colorful lights and shifting bodies, moving through the ocean of people, most of which he was thankfully tall enough to see over.

 

He spots Will in the corner, his heart speeding up when he sees him dancing with someone, each with a drink in hand. Mike pushes through the crowd, his friend coming into focus, grinning, his brown hair pushed back but still fluffy, a few fallen locks brushing his face as he swayed to the music. The sight would’ve made Mike smile ear to ear if it weren’t for the man across from him, who was far too good looking and far too close to Will for Mike’s liking.

 

As Mike nears the two, Will’s gaze catches on him, slight shock wavering his smile. The other guy seems to notice, glancing between the two before excusing himself with a awkward smile.

 

“Mike?” Will asks, half-shouting to be heard over both the music and the distance between them. “Uh, hi?”

 

“Hi,” Mike moves closer so they were now a foot apart.

 

“It’s nice to see you but um, what are you doing here?” Will smiles up at him, though confusion is etched in his brow.

 

“I- um,” Mike says, eyes searching Will’s face as if it held the answer to what he was looking for. Nothing came to mind, and lying was useless after knowing each other almost their entire lives. 

 

“I just needed to see you. Your roommate said you were here,” he conceded.

 

Will still looked a little confused, but just shrugged, smiling. “Okay.”

 

“Do you wanna get a drink?”

 

“Do you wanna dance?” Will said at the same time as Mike, before following up, “You can have mine, I’ve had a few already.”

 

“Oh, cool,” Mike took the drink, bringing it to his lips to cover the flush spreading over his cheeks.

 

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from his friend. He looked unfairly gorgeous in the yellow and purple-ish light, messy hair and all. His eyes fell to Will’s lips, head feeling light as the urge to brush them with Mike’s own clawed its way to the front and center of his mind despite his effort to shove it away. The wall holding back everything he knew deep down, but had always been too terrified of to even consider, came crashing down in slow motion.

 

Mike downed the rest of the drink.

 

“Come on,” Will grins, extending a hand, “Dance with me.”

 

Mike knows in that moment the gravity of this simple thing, knows that taking Will’s hand would be the nail in the coffin of everything he’d been trying desperately to be, ever since he knew what was expected from him. But Mike Wheeler is nothing if not self destructive.

 

He grasped Will’s hands in his own, feeling the warmth of it, solid and real, both thrilling and terrifyingly grounding. He smiled tentatively as Will guided him in a slightly uncoordinated dance, rhythmically swaying to the music.

 

Mike just stares at him for a moment, his childhood playmate, his best friend, his favorite person in the world, the person he thinks about the most, cares for the most, loves the most–

 

Loves.

 

The word echoes in his mind, impossible to take back now. And he finds he doesn’t want to take it back. This thing that he’d been so scared of, for years of his life, and it feels like the most natural thing in the world. Suddenly it doesn’t feel scary anymore.

 

Will smiles at him, big and bright and warm, and Mike can’t help but grin back. He pulls Will a little closer, moving a hand to his waist.

 

“Hi,” Mike says again softly, face hot.

 

“Hi,” Will’s eyes flick from his friend’s eyes to his lips and back up again.

 

“Wanna get out of here? Somewhere quieter at least?”

 

Mike nods, and Will takes his hands again and pulls him through the crowd, the two bumping against people and apologizing as they move past. They stop in the hallway, a little quieter now, the crowd thinner with only a few other people drinking nearby.

 

Mike studies Will’s face, big hazel eyes lit up, cheeks a soft pink and lips red, just now noticing the silver earrings that stood out against his friend’s dark navy shirt. He wishes he could wake up to this every day.

 

“You look great.”

 

“So do you, very professional," Will laughs, his voice low and ringing beautifully through the air. Mike’s chest swelled with pride at being the one to cause such a pretty sound, though the joy falters a bit recalling the smile Will had when he saw him earlier.

 

“…Who was that guy?” Mike asks despite himself, “Are you dating?”

 

“God no, we were just dancing, I don’t even know him,” Will replies.

 

“Cool,” Mike says, feeling slightly stupid.

 

“What, are you jealous?” Will teases, a smirk playing across his face, and Mike’s blush gets impossibly brighter.

 

“No.”

 

“Okay,” Will clearly doesn’t believe him, but smiles and brushes it off anyway.

 

“Is this new?” Mike wonders aloud, finger brushing the silver on Will’s earlobe.

 

“Yeah, do you like it?”

 

It almost sounded like Will was flirting with him, and it was driving Mike crazy.

 

“It’s nice. It suits you.” 

 

It really did, it complimented Will’s features beautifully. Mike hadn’t seen many men wearing earrings before now that he thought of it, and it really does look amazing on Will. He looks amazing in everything. Mike wants to kiss him right there, feel the metal against his lips and Will’s warm skin against his, and leave kisses all across Will’s cheeks and lips and–

 

Mike pulls the other man closer, hesitating before leaning down and planting a tender kiss on his cheek. Will looks up at him, eyes wide and cheeks now visibly flushing a bright red. Mike freezes for a moment, terrified again that he’s misread everything entirely wrong. Then, Will pulls him back by his shirt collar, pressing his lips against Mike’s softly, deepening the kiss when Mike kisses back, fingers finding their way into Mike’s curls and pulling him so their bodies pressed against one another. 

 

Mike thought he must’ve been dying right then, because this was the most alive he’s ever felt, the most free, and it felt like heaven, like this was too incredible to really be happening. Will Byers, kissing him, Mike Wheeler, his best friend for a decade and a half. The love of his life, something Mike hadn’t even fully come to terms with until moments ago. And he realized this was what everyone had been talking about, this, this is what love is. This is what love feels like, running through his veins like electricity, like fire, in the best way. This is what he’d been missing all this time, this is what he’d never let himself feel, all because some nosy angry people a million-or-whatever years ago had the ridiculous idea that it was wrong somehow. This didn’t feel wrong. This felt the most right Mike has ever felt.

 

Will pulls back, lips a lovely cherry red, light shining through his hair like a halo, the most gorgeous sight Mike’s ever seen.

 

“Fuck,” Will breathes, “Um, that– I didn’t expect that.”

 

“N-Neither did I,” Mike admits, trying to piece words together through the buzzing static in his brain, “You… Do you like me? I mean, like me, like me?”

 

“Yeah,” Will said, a giggle escaping his lips, as if it should be obvious, “Since forever.”

 

“Oh,” the shock was evident in his voice, though as he looked back on everything, it started to make a little more sense, and he began to feel a little dumb that he didn’t get any hints sooner. “Why me? I mean of all people, me?”

 

“First of all, have you seen yourself?” Will grins, “Second, you’re funny, third, you write amazing campaigns, fourth, you’re sweet and the most stupidly loyal person I’ve ever met. Do you need me to keep going?”

 

“But I’ve been such an idiot, I mean, for a ridiculously long time,” Mike counters, “And you’re like the most incredible, most talented person in the world.”

 

“Shut up,” Will smiles, pulling him in for another short kiss. “You may have been kind of an idiot, for, yeah, a long time, but you’re worth the wait.”

 

“Thank you,” Mike blushes, embarrassed, “…I just realized, I think I’ve been in love with you like, since we were kids.”

 

“Ppffftt,” Will laughs a little too loud, “I’m sorry, but seriously? You realized that tonight?”

 

“Yes,” Mike said offendedly, “Look, I know it’s ridiculous. I just thought it was how best friends felt.”

 

“You’re adorable,” Will smiled, pressing his forehead against Mike’s. “I love you.”

 

“I love you too,” Mike said, kissing him again, longer and deeper this time, trying to convey all the feelings he’d bottled up over the years.

 

“Lets get out of here,” Will said, breath ghosting across Mike’s lips. “Movie at my place?”

 

“I’d love to,” Mike smiled, heart feeling fuller than it had in years, holding Will’s hand like he was Mike’s whole world, and never wanting to let go.