Chapter Text
It was the end of the eleventh day. Everyone had fun at the party and gone home. It was the last day before it’d likely be reset again. Seven’s golden eyes drifted away from his ceiling down to the blonde boy curled at his side. He didn’t know why he’d done it, he was so tired of the same repeating of everything, the same old watching her flirt and get with the others, the same old hurting and being ignored. For some reason his mind had decided pulling Yoosung into a messy situation like this was a good idea. To push past boundaries and end up being… boyfriends? They’d never given it a name, but that’s probably what he should call it. Had he done it in search of someone to love? Had he done it because he was desperate for someone to give him the affection he craved? He didn’t know, but there was no bother worrying about it. The reset would happen soon.
His hand lifted to run through the blondes hair, pulling the unclipped bangs away from his face. He was still awake, wide lilac-colored eyes lifting to lock with golden ones. The redhead grimaced. Why did he give himself another person to hurt over when they forgot about him? Yoosung had seen his expression, about to ask what was wrong but Seven pulled him up before he could. He kissed him lightly, a brief wave of happier emotion washing over him, just enough to let him forget everything he had on his mind for a few seconds. Yoosung didn’t resist, eyes falling shut as he relaxed against Seven. There was a moment of silence, eyes shut and arms around each other as they relished in the tenderness of the moment.
Yoosung smiled softly, pulling back to look at the redheads face. His smile fell when he saw Seven looking down, expression tense like he was about to cry. “Seven…?” He murmured. When there was no response he gently cupped Seven’s cheeks and lifted his head. “Hey, look at me… What’s wrong?”
He hesitated, biting his lip and eyes looking away again. He couldn’t do this to Yoosung… but he was so tired of keeping everything inside. He looked back to lock his gaze with the blondes. “Please don’t forget about this.” He said quietly.
Yoosung was confused.“Forget?”
He swallowed thickly. There was no turning back now. “Don’t forget about… us.” His hands came up to grab onto the ones holding his face. “Don’t forget about these past eleven days, don’t forget about everything that happened between us.” He nearly choked on the words, actually saying them becoming harder than he thought it would. “I don’t know if I can… If I can handle you forgetting too.”
“Seven… What are you talking about?” He looked a bit scared, eyebrows drawing together in concern. “Of course I’m not going to forget.”
Seven couldn’t keep looking at him, his head fell and he choked out. “You don’t understand…” Of course he didn’t. Nobody could understand what he’d gone through over and over again. “I can’t handle losing everything anymore… I already lost her! She’s not coming back to me, I know she isn’t, she’s going to pick someone else!”
“S-Seven… Your scaring me…”
He wished he could shut up but he couldn’t stop now, the words spilling out of him like a dam had been broken. “I can’t lose you too! Not after this, not after I gave up on her and gave my everything to you!” He was almost worried he was crushing poor Yoosung’s hands with how hard he was gripping them, yet he kept going. “Please don’t forget if she resets it again! Please!”
Yoosung looked scared, confused and heartbroken, his boyfriend falling apart in front of him. “Seven, I… I don't understand.” He whispered sorrowfully. “What do you mean lose me? What do you mean you already lost her?? I want to understand, I want to help you.”
Seven couldn’t respond. He didn’t know how to. He wasn’t sure his voice would even work if he tried to speak. A sob ripped from his throat, his head falling against Yoosung’s shoulder. He kept mumbling, brokenly. “She’ll have to pick someone eventually, pick someone and just stay with them and this’ll all be over and I won’t have to deal with it anymore and…” He just kept going, his words eventually becoming incomprehensible and morphing into more crying.
Yoosung stopped trying to understand, simply holding him. “It’s okay… It’s okay, shhh.” He murmured, rocking Seven gently in feeble attempts to calm the redhead down. “…Hey Seven?”
The redhead gasped for air between his sobs, taking a moment to calm down enough to respond. “Wh-what?”
“…I… I love you…” Yoosung whispered into his ear.
Seven’s eyes widened, everything seeming to freeze around him. Those words hadn’t been said by either of them before. They echoed in his head as his mind slowly processed it. When they fully registered it was like he’d just been hit by a speeding truck. He felt a sharp, stabbing pain in his chest and choked, vision going blurry as the tears overtook him again. He buried his face into the crook of Yoosung’s neck, hugging the blond tightly to him as a loud, pained scream ripped from his throat. Yoosung was appalled by this response, obviously had been hoping his words would calm Seven down rather than make him start breaking down even worse. He frantically apologized, trying to to say he didn’t mean to make Seven so upset, that he didn’t mean to make it worse. “Idiot, idiot, idiot,” Seven hissed out the words. “You are such an idiot, I love you too.”
“Then why are you crying?!”
He shook his head. He couldn’t explain that. He sat back, cupping Yoosung’s face, trying to control himself and calm down enough to speak properly. “You are… You are my everything now. You’ve made me so happy. You lit up everything when I felt like it was all hopeless… After her… I…” He paused, taking a deep, shuddering breath to steady himself before he continued. “I love you so much. You are my star, fallen from the sky. I don’t deserve you, but here we are.” He laughed brokenly, a bittersweet smile coming to his face. “I don't deserve you…” He repeated quietly.
Yoosung’s eyes flicked across his face a few moments, silent. He thought, before reaching out and gently brushing Seven’s hair out of his face. “You deserve to be happy… I want you to be happy.” He admitted. “I want you to smile, and to mean it when you smile… I like your smile.”
Seven’s expression became pained again, though he kept his small smile nontheless. “It might be awhile before we can get my genuine smile back.” Yoosung frowned, but before he could say anything, the redhead continued. “Why don't we sleep…? I think I just need to rest right now. I’ll feel better tomorrow.” That’s a lie. You might be gone. “Okay?”
Those lilac eyes searched his face again, but the blonde didn’t argue. “Alright.”
Seven insisted upon holding him close, tight to his chest when they pulled the blanket over themselves. A part of him hoped she would stay with who she’d chosen this time around… Had it been Jumin, Jaehee or Zen? He didn’t remember. He didn’t care. Just please let him have this. Let him keep Yoosung if he couldn’t keep anything else. He nestled his nose into the blonde hair, praying desperately he would wake up with it still there.
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A phone was buzzing, alerting him of new messages and dragging him from his sleep. Seven rubbed his eyes, glasses nearly falling off his face, he must have passed out with them on again… Figures… He yawned, sitting and stretching himself out, arms high above his head. Through sleepy eyes, he took in the empty space on the bed next to him. Yoosung must be making breakfast He thought blearily to himself. His phone started going off again and he groaned, turning to the bedside desk to grab it. As soon as he opened the RFA app his heart stopped.
MC has entered the chatroom.
No.
No…
No…
Seven shouldn’t have, but he threw his phone as hard as he could at the wall and screamed.