Chapter Text
Peace.
The world blurs out, sound gone and light dimmer as my body sinks to the bottom of the ocean.
My eyes watch as I sink deeper. The surface getting further and further away from me. There's no turning back now and as I feel the last bits of air escape my lungs, I know I am finally at peace. And I am at peace knowing that I left everyone I cared for with what they need to not hurt after I'm gone.
Finally. Quiet.
As light slowly starts to fade from the edges of my vision, a bright light starts to shine above me and i wonder if this it for me. If this is the end.
The water ripples, the light getting brighter and a bright flash shines in the water as the last exhale of air escapes me.
Ringing. That's what's I hear. Loud and insistent and very disturbing. Slowly, the ringing in my ears starts to fade and I get a small reprieve from the pounding im my head.
I'm laying in solid ground. That's the first thing I note. Did someone bring me back? I wonder and I anger courses thróugh me. But no, if i was resuscitated, then I'd be on sand. In the beach. Not hard rock.
I finally open my eyes and I'm met with a cloudy sky.
What the fuck?
Slowly sitting up, I groan in discomfort. My body feeling like I was beaten up and thrown down a flight of stairs.
Looking around, i realise I'm in an alleyway and the buildings around me are all very strange. Stone and giving off an old Victorian era kind of vibe.
How the hell did I end up here?
Getting up to my feet, a wave of dizziness passes over me and I clutch the wall to stop from falling back to the ground. I groan and slowly but surely, the dizziness and headache start to recide and i feel more stable in mu body.
I push away from the road and look around once more, finding the exit and seeing people milling about, passing by like any normal day. I look down at my body and realise I'm dressed in black leather, which strange.
Was I kidnapped? What is all this?
I shake my head, square my shoulders and walk slowly towards the exit. When I step out of the alleyway, I see more people than I expected. A lot dressed in black and some leather, like me, which, odd.
Others are dressed in white and others blue and dark blue colours and I get a weird sense of de ja vu. Like i know what this is.
They're all walking in the same direction and I turn and see the largest building I've ever seen. It's huge, all stone and beautiful. I don't know how to describe it, other than something straight out of a fantasy novel.
I'm drawn out of my thoughts by someone bumping into me and I apologize on instinct. I am standing in the middle of the road.
I start moving, my feet leading me towards the large building. My eyes are drawn here and there, but are finally drawñ to the open gates. I walk through and watch as the ones dressed in other colours moves towards different doors, but I follow those dressed in black and stop infront of stairs. Like, so many stairs. I swear this is all so very familiar, but I just can't quite place my finger on it.
I don't realise I'm frozen in place until someone taps my shoulder and complains about me holding up the line.
I apologise. Again. And make my way forward, to an older man and two others. A table with a scroll and feather.
What exactly am I going to sign up for?
I wonder anxiously and my nerves are clearly very visible. One of the men in leather scoffs at me and I feel embarrassed at the clear disapproval in their stares.
The older man tuts at them and looks at me reassuringly. "Just write down your name and climb up the stairs to reach the parapet." He tells me and I nod, but my brain malfunctions.
Parapet? As in, Basgiath parapet? Is this some kind of roleplay I've been dragged into?
I question and reach the scroll. I pause, just short of signing my name and wonder if i should use my real name. This is all so strange and I'm so confused. Best to play it safe. Ruelle Ackerman. I sign, though I have so difficulty using the feather and my handwriting looks like shit.
I drop it and make my way to the stairs, but not without hearing one of the men behind me.
"Hesitation like that. She won't survive the first day." One of them scoffs.
"First day? She won't make it halfway across the parapet." The other says and both start snickering behind me.
I ignore them both and make my way up the stairs, thoughts whirring.
Parapet. Basgiath, obviously. The stairs, meaning conscription day. What the hell happened between me drowning and ending up here. There's no way someone dived into the water to save me. I made sure I was too far away from land for that.
Is this some kind of hallucination? Like a final picture in my head before death finally claims my soul.
Because if it is, then it's both awesome and crazy. Why would my last vision be Basgiath and not....
Whatever. That's not important. What's important is what's happening right now.
Maybe someone did get to me and I'm in coma and this is all some crazy coma dream.
Because if that's the case, then I'm going to enjoy it for as long as I can. I was already pretty used to living in my head before. This isn't so different. Only, this time. I don't ever want to wake up.
I make it to the end of the stairs. Shifting the pack on my back and move forward, following the line.
If I'm really in Basgiath, then the man I saw at the bottom of the stairs is probably Captain Fitzzgibbons. That's if, this is the year Violet joins. Then again, he's probably always there for every year. Guess I'll find out what year I am if I meet Xaden Riorson in front.
But surely it's Violet's first year. Cause that's the story i know. Then again, the mind is such a strange place.
I make my way to the front, Three riders wait at the entrance, which is nothing more than a gaping hole in the wall of the turret. One with ripped-off sleeves records names as candidates step out onto the treacherous crossing. Another, who’s shaved all his hair with the exception of a strip down the top center and finally the most handsome man I've ever set my miserable eyes on.
He's hot. Like spicy hot. Like burning in the deepest pits of hell hot. This man looks like sin and I will gladly sign my name to devil for a taste.
That's definitely Xaden.
There's no way for me to describe him, other than what Violet described clearly not being enough to sum up just how handsome he is.
My eyes trail over his figure, stopping on the relic tattooed to his arm, then shifting to his face and then eyes. The golden flecks I see in them are all the confirmation I need to know who this man is and my heart does this fúnny thing that might have been a mini heart attack.
"Next!" One of the rider's shouts, pulling me out of my thoughts and I have to force my eyes off him as I move forward.
"Name?" The rider asks, clearly bored and tired.
My brain lags and I have to remember the name I wrote down on the scroll earlier. "Ru...Ruelle Ackerman." I mutter nervously and the rider looks at me with a raised brow, then scoffs and writes it down in the scroll.
I feel a pair of eyes on me and I look, my breath hitching when I find Xaden staring at me. Suspicion burning in his gaze.
I swallow nervously, as it feels like he's trying to figure something out about me.
I force myself to look away first, trying very hard to hide hoe nervous i am and step forward and onto the turret.
Shit. It's scarier in person.
I take a deep breath, force my legs to stop shaking. I cannot fall here. I refuse to die here.
I don't dwell on the sudden desire to live, considering what lead me to this position. I don't even understand why I'm taking this so seriously. It's a dream. Non of it's real. But I'll still take it over reality, so dream on.
I exhale and almost jump out of my skin when a deep voice speaks behind me.
"Stop stalling and move. The longer you think, the easier you'll fall." Xaden says dryly and I can't the help the irritation that courses through me at his words.
I forgot what a dick he was. His looks can be very distracting from his personality. Unless you're Violet.
I turn and stick out my tongue at him, then focus back on the turret, missing the way his brows rise in surprise and ignore the embarrassment that floods me at the childish act.
I exhale and step onto the turret. It's a little slick. Guessing it just rained. Which means if this is Violet's first year, then she's already gone across.
I move slow and carefully, keeping my eyes on the trail and not the thousand foot drop on either side of me. The fact that it just rained does not help my case. I'm so glad I woke up in leathers and boots. Because smooth soles would've dropped over there edge halfway in.
My heart pounds excessively in my chest and I need a distraction because thinking about falling is not helping. So instead, I think about musics. Replaying all my favourite songs in my head for as long as it takes to get to the other side.
I don't realise how long I've been walking until i reach the final stretch Violet mentions. The turret is wider, the wall is closer and the courtyard is only ten feet away. I hasten my steps, not by much, but I really want to get off this death walkway.
When my feet hit solid, full sided ground, I can finally breath easier. My heart still beats a little too loud, but not from fear, now it's excitement. And accomplishment. One challenge down. A million more to go.
I give the rider my name and move towards where other candidates, now cadets stand. Others chatting, some leaning against the wall stoically. I look around and see a little place I can sit. It's around a wall, which means not too open and I quickly make my way towards it.
I exhale loudly when I'm seated. My body feeling like it's crushing now that the little spike of adrenaline i had before comes down. I close my eyes for a moment, taking three deep breaths as my brain tries to arrange itself.
When my eyes open, I look around and can't help but marvel at how real it all looks. The people, the walls. Everything. It's so vivid, like life. I must be on some really good drugs.
As my eyes scan the crowd, a flash of silver catches my attention and my eyes immediately zone in on brown hair fading to silver at the bottom. Violet Sorrengail. My mind immediately supplies. Her back is to me, so I can't seé her face, but it is most definitely her. My eyes move to the woman next her and the braids in her head are a dead giveaway. Rhiannon Matthias. Violet's best friend. Who's face I also can't see. I suppose they really did make it across.
So I'm definitely in the first book of Fourth Wing.
My eyes shift away from the two, looking around, but I doubt I'll be able to know who's who. Violet's hair is what gives her away. Same as Rhiannon. I might be able to recognise Bodhi, because of his similarities to Xaden and probably Liam. But the rest are a mystery. I'll just have to keep a close eye and ear out.
I don't know for how long I'm seated, but my eyes shift when I notice everyone moving towards the dias. I get up, picking up my pack and throwing it over my shoulders as i move to stand in formation with everyone else.
There's a slight pause and I watch as all wingleaders stand atop the dias and then watch an elder man walk to the front. This is it.
“Three hundred and one of you have survived the parapet to become cadets today,” Commandant Panchek starts with a politician’s smile, gesturing to us. “Good job. Sixty-seven did not.”
"As the Codex says, now you begin the true crucible!” Panchek shouts, his voice carrying over the five hundred of us that I estimate are in this courtyard. “You will be tested by your superiors, hunted by your peers, and guided by your instincts. If you survive to Threshing, and if you are chosen. You will be riders. Then we’ll see how many of you make it to graduation.”
"Your instructors will teach you,” Panchek promises, his hand sweeping to the line of professors standing at the doors to the academic wing. “It’s up to you how well you learn." He swings his pointer finger at us. “Discipline falls to your units, and your wingleader is the last word. If I have to get involved…” A slow, sinister smile spreads across his face. “You don’t want me involved."
“With that said, I’ll leave you to your wingleaders. My best advice? Don’t die.” He walks off the dais with the executive commandant, leaving only the riders on the stone stage.
A brunette woman with wide shoulders and a scarred sneer stalks forward, the silver spikes on the shoulders of her uniform flashing in the sunlight. “I’m Nyra, the senior wingleader of the quadrant and the head of the First Wing. Section leaders and squad leaders, take your positions now.”
“First Squad! Claw Section! First Wing!” Nyra calls out. “Cadets, when your name is called, take up formation behind your squad."
The redhead with the crossbow and roll steps forward and begins calling names. One by one, cadets move from the crowd to the formation, and I keep count, making snap judgments based off clothing and arrogance like Violet did. It looks like each squad will have about fifteen or sixteen people in it.
Jack is called into the Flame Section of First Wing and I immediately turn my head, needing to know the face of that psychopath. I memorise his face and intend to keep away from him as much as possible.
We’re silent as the rest of the wings are called. The sun is out in full now, beating into my leathers and scorching my skin.
They call Second Wing and I watch as Violet, Rhiannon and Ridoc are called into the same squad. I snort quietly when I see the relief in her shoulders because she thinks she's not going to be im Xaden's squad. Like he'd let that pass.
They call the other squads and finally, I'm called into Third Wing, Tail Section, Third Squad. I move into formation, standing behind another cadet.
The rest of the squads are called and soon after I watch Xaden discuss something with the wingleaders of Second Wing. It's happening, Xaden's having Violet moved to his squad.
An irrational wave of jealousy and sadness washes over me and I shake it off. Of course his attention is on Violet. I may love this man, but he will never be mine. My eyes shift to silver tipped hair and I finally get a goid glimpse of her and she is beautiful. Yeah, there's no way I'm wining over that.
I turn away, keeping my eyes forward as Xaden steps forward and all eyes are drawn to him.
"You’re all cadets now.” Xaden’s voice carries out over the courtyard, stronger than the others. "Take a look at your squad. These are the only people guaranteed by Codex not to kill you. But just because they can’t end your life doesn’t mean others won’t. You want a dragon? Earn one.”
Most of the others cheer, but I keep my mouth shut.
Xaden’s eyes find mine, and my stomach clenches before he looks away.
“And I bet you feel pretty badass right now, don’t you, first-years?”
More cheers.
"You feel invincible after the parapet, don’t you?” Xaden shouts. “You think you’re untouchable! You’re on the way to becoming the elite! The few! The chosen!”
Another round of cheers goes up with each declaration, louder and louder. No.That’s not just cheering, it’s the sound of wings beating the air into submission.
I've always imagined what the dragons looked like. AI definitely helped with bringing up a good idea of what the book described. But seeing them like this. It's–unreal.
Just when I think they’re about to fly overhead, they pitch vertically, whip the air with their huge semi translucent wings, and stop, the gusts of wing-made wind so powerful that I nearly stagger backward as they land on the outer semicircular wall. Their chest scales ripple with movement, their razor-sharp talons dig into the edge of the wall on either side.
My body shakes. A few cadets scream but I'm frozen in place. I have to remind myself that this isn't real. It's all in my head. That I want to be strong even if it's false.
That's the only reason I don't run. That's the only reason I only flinch when I see someone from my squad make i run for it. I try to shout at him to stop running, but my throat is clogged up and i watch as fire streams down on him, burning him to a crisp. Heat blasting against the side of my face. Very real heat. This is all starting to feel a little too real.
It happens again and the smell of smoke is so powerful I start to question whether my earlier thoughts were correct. Whether... it's not all in my head.
I shake my head and turn my head away from the burning ash and gasp when golden eyes stare straight at me. Almost looking into my soul. It takes a moment for me to realise it's a blue dragon. Sgaeyl. She is both breathtaking and terrifying. And she's looking at me really hard.
I don't move, standing my ground until she gets bored–hopefully–and turns away from me. My eyes shift to Xaden and my pulse spikes when I find his eyes already on me. Watching me. I meet his gaze for a moment until he finally turns away.
I tune out the rest of his speech. My ears ringing
and smoke still filling my nostrils as I try to calm my racing heart down. It feels like I'm having a heart attack.
What is happening? I wonder as I clench my fists to stop the trembling.