Work Text:
Susie: Hey.
Hey Kris.
Are you alright?
Kris (trying hard to catch their breath): … susie.
Susie: Do you.. need me to uh, come over?
Kris (between staggered breaths): Susie. I want to. I need to talk to you about something.
Susie: …huh? Sure.
You can tell me anything. If it helps you get it off your chest and stuff.
Kris: Susie.
(They turn themselves over from bed and sit down on the floor.
It’s so, so late right now.
They couldn’t sleep.)
… Remember.. how I used to be controlled…?
(Susie gets out of bed as well to sit next to Kris)
Susie: —yeah, I do. Like, being a puppet on strings. Or some kind of video game character. That was fucked up.
(Kris turned to her, appreciating her sympathy, but…)
Kris (looking back into the distance): You… only saw that it - it was .. a good person.
Susie: well, yeah. That was pretty weird. But even otherworldly entities have some kind of morals, I guess.
Glad it wasn’t an entirely fucked up piece of shit.
Kris (seeming to be remembering… and struggling to focus on reality):
What you saw wasn’t all that happened.
(Their voice seemed to crack at the end. Their heart aches.)
Susie (trying to piece things together from their adventures): did it.. have to do with Noelle?
Kris (emotionally, heart beating faster): Noelle.
Noelle. Noelle. Noelle. Noelle.
Susie: Hey. Hey.
Breathe, Kris.
(She put her hand on theirs and held it tightly. It was something they asked her to do last time they had this kind of a breakdown. She felt that even if she had to sit here for hours, she would. as long as it meant Kris felt better.
Their hands are warm and delicate. Yet their grip is tight, as if… having to rip something out of your own body was a near daily occurrence.
And it was. Susie couldn’t even fathom the amount of pain Kris probably felt just under that heart’s control. How could it all get any worse?)
Kris (after a long pause and trying to recollect themselves):
we committed murder.
Susie: Y- you and…!!?
Kris: of darkners.
And of… of…….
Susie (starting to seethe with rage): So it wasn’t a ‘perfect angel’ after all. God, my fucking god…
And while we were away? So that nobody else would know???!!?
(she increasingly raises her volume out of anger)
Of - of noelle no less. It took ADVANTAGE of her because she found it hard to say no.
And It hurt her. It HURT her—
Kris: she… she still tries to act like nothing happened at all. She’s, (tears start to flow from their eyes by themselves. Kris doesn’t care to stop them.) so… good at blocking out extremely traumatic things that happen to her.
But I can’t.
(They’re shaking.)
Susie: Kris— Kris, I—
(She leans on their back from behind, using her weight similar to a heavy pressured blanket. She continues to hold their hands.)
(Kris coughs aggressively as mucus runs down the back of their throat. Sobbing is so uncomfortable. They can’t help it. Their other coping mechanism was just to…
It’s better to cry.
And it’s easier to cry when Susie is here.
Just… her presence is comforting enough. Enough to let out everything.)
Kris (after sobbing for another while and calming themselves down enough to speak again): …we also were the ones that sent berdly… into that coma.
Susie (lowering her volume and trying to speak gently): he’s alright now. he recovered.
Kris (repeating after her to comfort themselves):
he recovered.
he recovered.
It’s just.
(They rub their eyes. They’ve already cried so much.)
She trusted me.
We knew each other. She knew me. (Then, the words wouldn't stop…) I had to watch it all happen and the terror in her eyes and the words were coming out of my mouth and it told her so many horrible things… and the rings, the rings, like we were married - Married - it all felt like … an abusive relationship.
It had used my body to break her brain.
In my name.
(It felt so good to say it. But the reality still felt more than sickening.)
…
Susie was speechless.
Susie (taking a deep breath and processing this): …Kris.
Do you remember that plan to save Noelle from Queen?
I never told you what happened, right…?
Susie (reflecting): When I entered the room…
Her eyes looked kinda distant. Like she wasn’t really sure she was real or something.
Next to her were… two frozen darkners. I thought, geez, what kind of decoration is that?
Then again, I didn’t question it at the time since Queen also wanted to make her face into a robot one.
Sigh.
I guess I should’ve connected the dots.
After all, her hands…
they were so cold.
(Kris nodded.)
Susie: And, well, I noticed that because—when I walked into the room she looked so relieved to see me. I sat down next to her and she ended up crying into my arms.
I didn’t really know what was going on, so I panicked and told her it was all a dream.
Hearing that, she wiped her tears and smiled. So I thought things were going to be okay after that.
It wasn’t really my thing before to help make someone feel better. You’d know, Kris. I was busy, uhh.. trying to harm people.
Yet it made me feel more powerful to lift others up than to… put them down. And it made me feel really good inside and stuff. I think I was smiling the whole day afterward, heh.
Whatever happened next, I thought… I would do it all for her smile.
(her smile quickly drops as the memory fades…)
Yet I hadn't had the slightest clue what she went through…
What either of you went through.
Kris: Susie. It’s okay, really — I wouldn't have wanted you to have to bear that burden of knowing what had happened.
…
I’m just glad you could help Noelle to feel a bit better.
Kris (breathing deeply): Because I was paranoid that night. I needed to make sure everyone was okay.
so I tried to undo all the damage—- I carried Berdly to the hospital by myself, and I went to Noelle’s house to apologize for everything it did. I gave her back the watch. I took the thorn out of her finger—-
Susie (fucking pissed): It gave her that torture device.
Kris: But without a soul.. I… I was so exhausted. I couldn’t let it fuck up everything I did that night so… that’s part of why I made a fountain.
Susie (realizing what came next): But… the morning after, we went to go see her.
You and Noelle went to talk… alone.
Kris (looking back fondly): She was… really glad that I did that last night. And… she could tell the difference between me and the entity’s voices. She recognized me. Even after all this time, more or less like strangers… she still knows me better than anyone.
(Susie: yeah, I genuinely had NO clue you were acting differently than usual.)
Kris (continuing): And then she kept scooting closer to me. I didn’t know what for, but we were a lot closer as kids. She used to lay on my shoulder. Or hold hands. Or lay on my lap. I never really minded, so I guess it was just an old habit to turn to physical touch for comfort. Maybe, even after that, she wished for us to be closer again.
Kris (starting to shake again, holding Susie’s hands tighter): But the whole time, I could see it stalking us in the fucking vent. No matter what I did to lock it away it always managed to just… act as if it could do anything by its will alone and just — break all the rules of our world.
Susie: because it was all a game to them, wasn’t it. Those fuckers. They just pacified enemies to give themselves a good image, huh. God, they make me so angry I could just—
(Kris kisses her to keep her from destroying anything)
Kris: I know.
…But that’s where it all ended. Maybe by that point, they had realized this wasn’t just a game anymore. Everything else had been in the dark world…
Susie: because they thought their actions wouldn't have consequences, huh.
(Strongly sarcastic) Well THANKS otherworldly entity for realizing the error of your ways! Damn! Didn’t know murder and manipulation was a bad thing! Ah shit, I didn’t realize it affected ACTUAL PEOPLE’S LIVES!!
(She unclenches her fists. She didn’t even realize she was clenching them.)
Just, all this to say…
You didn’t have to hold that whole terrifying experience yourself. I’m.. glad you told me about it.
(She tips their chin a little toward her, and looks at them thoughtfully) I’m not too good with comforting with words but, uh,
I hope this helps you feel somewhat better about it…
You were innocent in all of this.
(Then she kisses them deeply, as a way of communicating that she means it. That she understands. That she feels for what they went through. That their tears were justified. That none of that was okay. That she’s here until they feel better. That she hopes that they recover, too…)
Kris: ..thank you.
I do feel a lot better now that I’ve talked about it.
…Hey, Susie?
Susie: Huh?
Kris: Goodnight, bastard. (Affectionate)
Susie: Goodnight, weirdo with PTSD. (She bites them lightly. That’s Susie’s goodnight kiss, if you didn’t know.)
Susie (muttering to herself as she gets back to bed): man, I am going to make Noelle the happiest girl ever. She needs it.
… Her and Kris…
they deserve the world.
[end]
(Stupid little epilogue:)
Susie: DUDE KRIS THE SUN JUST CAME UP AND I CLOSED MY EYES 5 MINUTES AGO. HOW LONG DID WE SPEND TALKING