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“You okay?” Andrew asked softly. Chris nodded as he curled his legs up to his chest. Andrew looked unamused. He watched Chris wrap his arms around his legs and hold himself tight. He was looking off, distantly. “You don’t seem it.”
Chris looked up at him. Of course he wasn’t okay. None of them were okay in the slightest. He put that thought aside. “I’m fine Andrew.” He assured gently.
Andrew was standing in the hallway leading to his room, leaning on a wall. Chris glanced past him, searching for the third house member. If he came out Andrew would leave or at least his attention wouldn’t be on him anymore.
He didn’t show from wherever he had last scurried to however. “I know how you get when you think too much.” He sat himself next to Chris leaning back on the couch. Why Chris was always on the floor was beyond him.
Chris looked over at him slowly, not letting all his attention be given straight to him. “How exactly do I get?”
He stumbled for what to say after realizing how that sounded. “I don’t know man…” he fumbles around with his hands to emulate thinking. “You get… wordy..”
“Is being ‘wordy’ a bad thing?” He felt a distant feeling in his chest, one he’d never felt around Andrew before.
Andrew glanced at him through the corners of his eyes. “You just…” he sighed, he didn’t have any better words to describe this.
“I just what?”
Andrew looked at Chris.
“I what?” He demanded an answer.
Andrew subconsciously leaned away, his glancing lagging behind his movement. “You just say a lot of words that are hard to understand.” He shrugged trying to play off all the sudden emotion he felt from Chris.
Chris stared directly at him, if Andrew were to look back they’d be making eye contact.
“I don’t mean that in a bad way I just—“
Chris rolled his eyes. “Don’t want to listen to it. I get it.”
Andrew paused, but when he finally spoke he was defensive. “I never said that.”
“You don’t have to say it Andrew.” Chris looked back at him, now they were staring right into each other’s eyes. “But I know what you mean.”
“Don’t put words into my mouth!” His eyebrows furrowed.
Usually it was now that Chris would back down, they’d started miniature arguments before and it always ended with Chris apologizing and leaving it alone. He didn’t want that anymore.
“I’m not putting any words in your mouth.” He retorted. “I know you, Andrew. I know how you think.”
Andrew stared at him for a minute before he snapped back to the conversation at hand. “You aren’t in my head, you don’t know anything about me.”
“I know much more about you than you know about me!” Chris answered incredulously.
That couldn’t be true, and Andrew said as much.
“Of course it’s true!” He groaned exasperated. “It’s true because all you ever do is talk about yourself and what you want!”
“That’s not true either! The whole reason you’re even here right now is because of what I did for you!” Andrew scoffed.
Chris held himself tighter and turned away. “Thank you so much for that!”
“Don’t be immature.” Andrew hissed, “you’d be dead still if I hadn’t kept going.”
“I’m immature?!” Chris cried. “When I told you to stop for your own good you said we shouldn’t be friends anymore!”
Andrew went silent. Chris slowly turned back to him, he was just staring at him.
“And you have nothing to say cause it’s true.” Chris muttered. “You were going to ruin our friendship because I didn’t support you ruining your life.”
“I wasn’t ruining my life.” He spoke softly.
Chris shut his eyes tight, “don’t argue about that.” He looked away again. “If one of us knows anything about ruining their life because of those stupid wells it’s me.”
Andrew shook his head, “nothing was being ruined. I was doing what was right!”
Chris let out a shakey sigh. He couldn’t do this anymore and he didn’t know what made him think he could in the first place. “I’m done. You can believe what you want to.”
Andrew wasn’t done defending himself though, “I wasn’t ruining anything, not my life, not anything between us!” He was fully facing Chris who’s head was in his arms as he was still in his curled up position. “The wells meant nothing when compared to you and what I could’ve gotten by continuing!”
“You say that but it’s not true!” The other cried, muffled from the cavern of his arms.
“It is! Why can’t you believe me?!”
“Because all those stupid things do is suck you in!” He shouted, “it’s like a drug! You can never get enough until it ends up killing you!”
“But nothing happened!” Andrew defended, “and now look, I have you back. I have you closer than ever!”
“Andrew please!” He looked up at him. Andrew had sat up on his heels and was seemingly towering over Chris now. “Andrew you don’t understand!” Andrew sat and watched as tears pooled and overflowed from the other’s eyes.
“Of… of course I understand!” His tone wasn’t as harsh anymore but he was still being far too loud.
Chris shook his head as he wiped his tears, “you don’t..! And you can’t!..”
“I do understand!” Andrew defended, “it happened to me, how could I not!”
Chris went to say more but only a sob came out as he retreated back to his arms. Andrew said nothing, and at first he did nothing, but listening to Chris cry—especially over him—was torture. He slowly inched toward him and rested a hand on his back, but it was shrugged off. “Just go, Andrew.” He whispered.
Andrew frowned in response, he got up and began to walk away before, “I’m sorry Chris…”
He waited a moment but all that came from the addressed were sniffles and sobs.
His final attempt, guilt hung from his words. “G..goodnight.” When he still got nothing he shuffled off to his room for another sleepless night.