Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You’re lying on the ground.

Something soft lies between you and it, but you’re still pretty close to the ground.

Your left side hurts. A lot. As if you just hit it really hard.

...It takes you longer than it should have to realise that none of this is normal. You were just in the Void. Surrounded by blackness, kinda intangible.

You feel pain now, so you must have an actual body, so the darkness you’re seeing (if that’s the right way to phrase it) must be because your eyes are closed. Not because there’s nothing to see.

For the first time in who knows how long, you open your eyes.

***

It’s too bright.

It hurts too much.

Where even are you?

What happened?

It hurts!

You close your eyes.

You’re not the one who opened them anyway.

***

Your eyes slam back shut. Tight. Like whoever closed them doesn’t want them to open again anytime soon.

“Hey, is there someone there?” you try asking. The way that control was wrenched from you makes you think that you aren’t alone.

“Wh-what was that?” you hear an internal voice say. It sounds young. And scared.

You make your ‘speech’ sound as friendly as possible. “Greetings! My name is Chara. I think I know where we are, but I need you to open your eyes for me to be sure.”

“How am I hearing your voice like that?”

“I think I’m inside your head. Don’t worry about it. Please could you open your eyes.” The kid actually shakes their head. “I’m not going to fight you over it, but it would be really helpful.”

“Did you open my eyes just now?”

“I think so.”

“Why are you in my head?”

“I have no idea.”

“...Chara, right?”

“Yes.”

“I’m *****.”

“...What?”

“That’s my name.”

“I didn’t quite get that, could you say it again?”

“It’s *****.”

“Perhaps try saying it aloud.”

Your body takes a breath and speaks. “My name’s *****.”

“...Yeah, I still didn’t get that.”

“I said it really clearly that time!”

“I know you did. I felt it. My brain’s just not understanding . It’s not your fault, don’t worry. Now could you please open your eyes.”

***

The voice in your head (Chara, they said their name was) really wants you to open your eyes. So, slowly, you do.

It’s bright, but your eyes don’t take too long to adjust. You appear to be lying on gold-coloured flowers of some kind. You look upwards to see a circle of some sort that light seems to be coming from. Looking around, you see dark walls on all sides.

Your body sits up. Your side doesn’t hurt so much anymore, so you let it.

“Yeah,” says Chara, “we’re in the Underground. You just fell, right?”

“I guess.”

“I did that too. No idea how long ago though. These flowers weren’t here. Hey, I thought they were only on the Surface...”

You shift your position on the flowers so that you’re sitting, rather than lying down.

“How old are you Chara?”

You feel a small bubble of amusement that you assume comes from them. “I was 14 when I died. You?”

“You’re dead?!”

“Very. How old are you?”

“I’m seven.”

Their amusement turns to concern. “Why were you climbing Ebbot?”

“....I didn’t want to be there.”

“If you don’t want to tell me, then don’t. It’s not really my business anyway”

“Okay.”

“...So are we going to get up.”

“No.”

“No?”

“If we wait here then my mummy will find me.”

“I seriously doubt that.”

***

This kid clearly doesn’t understand the gravity of the situation.

“My mummy always says that if I get lost then I should stay in one place so it’ll be easier to find me.”

“She won’t find you down here.”

“If I’m passent then everything will be okay.”

“You mean patient?”

“That’s what I said.”

“No it’s-” you remember the kid’s seven, “nevermind. We can’t stay here.”

“We won’t be here long.”

“Nobody’s going to find us.”

“That’s not true.”

You try to stand, but the legs don’t cooperate with your wishes.

“No. It’s my body and I say we’re staying here!”

You can’t argue with their logic right now. You’re still trying to deal with suddenly being sort of kind of alive again. If the kid wants to stay here then fine. They can.

They’ll get hungry at some point and then they’ll move. For now they can sit here getting bored.

See if you care.

...

You care.

You get bored a lot faster than the child does. They talk to you about nothing in particular and somehow don’t run out of topics.

They’re in the middle of telling you about the annoying boy in their class at school when you hear a noise. They must hear it too, because they jump to their feet and start calling out “Over here! I’m here!”

To your utter despair, you see a Vegetoid shuffle into view. The first sentient thing you’ve properly seen in what could be a very long time and it’s one of the carrots.

You expect it to go and get someone, or to tell the stubborn child to follow it.

The colours fade from the flowers and you feel a pull at your chest. The kid looks down to see a light blue heart floating just in front of them. The same words are floating near the ground as there were when this happened to you. FIGHT. ACT. ITEM. MERCY.

“Chara what’s going on?”

“That Vegetoid just summoned your SOUL and took you into battle.”

“Huh?”

“Wait, it’s doing something.”

The Vegetoid starts sending white vegetable-shaped pellets at the SOUL in front of you. You try to move it, but it stays where it is.

“Kid, move your SOUL.”

“It won’t move.”

“It’s not that hard! Let me do it!”

“I’m not stopping you! It won't move!”

Every single one of the pellets hit the SOUL. A sharp pain races through your body, felt by you and the kid. You both cry out.

You’re dimly aware of your shared HP reaching 0.

Once again you’re back in the Void.

...But something’s different. And you’re not alone.

Chapter Text

The words are different.

There’s no ‘RESET’ button.

Instead, the two options read ‘CONTINUE’ and ‘DO NOT’.

You look around and see a small child in the Void with you.

In their hair is a faded pink ribbon, which matches the dress that they’re wearing, which also has white stripes on the skirt. They stare at the words, then slowly turn their head to look at you.

They open their mouth to say something, but you don’t wait for them. You reach out your hand and select ‘CONTINUE’.

***

You’re lying on the ground again and your left side hurts like it did when you first woke up and...”

“Hey, kid, you there?”

“Chara!” You open your eyes and sit up quickly; a decision which you immediately regret as the pain increases.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“What just happened?”

“You died. But by pressing ‘CONTINUE’ we were able to turn back time a little. I did it a few times when I was alive. I think it’s a determination thing.”

You pick at a flower in front of where you’re sitting. “I died?”

“Yep. The carrot shot your SOUL and your HP hit 0. Insta-death.”

“And we turned back time?”

“Looks like.” Chara pauses, then says, “Your dress is pretty.”

“Thank you! I really like your jumper!”

You feel a sense of happiness coming from.... somewhere. You guess it must be coming from Chara.

“Look, Cyan - ”

“My name isn’t Cyan, it’s *****.”

“Yeah, and I still can’t hear that, so I’m going to call you Cyan because that’s the colour of your SOUL.”

“...Well what’s your SOUL colour.”

“Mine’s red. For determination. Yours is cyan for patience, which to be honest I didn’t need to see your SOUL to figure out.”

“How come I haven’t seen yours?” you ask.

“Because it’s your SOUL the carrot called up. Speaking of which, if we stay here it’ll just kill us again. We need to move.”

“But my mummy...”

“She isn’t going to get here in time. So we should go to her. I know which way to go, so we can find her.”

They’re right. You hate it, but they’re right. Reluctantly (and slowly due to the pain in your side) you stand up. You grab your toy knife from where it fell next to you and tuck the flower you picked behind your ear. “Okay, let’s go. Lead on!”

***

You didn’t even notice that they had a toy knife until they picked it up. In your defense, the beginning of the cave was fairly dark.

Immediately as you walk through what was the town you notice a marked decrease in the population. There’s nowhere near the amount of people that there was. Have they all moved into the other area’s of the Underground?

What’s weirder, though, are the strange looks that the townspeople give you (well, give Cyan) as you walk through.

Like they don’t trust you.

Like they hate you.

To their credit, Cyan gets over the fact that they’re surrounded by monsters really quickly. The existence of monsters was pretty much old news to them by the time they saw the second Froggit, so they don’t pay them any mind.

You keep walking, but you clutch the plastic knife tightly in Cyan’s hands. You’ve already been killed once. You aren’t eager to repeat the experience.

It’s concerning that neither you nor Cyan could move their SOUL when in battle. There’s practically no way of surviving like that!

Almost as if you’d summoned it, a Loox steps in your way. The colour fades and the battle screen comes up.

***

The Mike Wasowski lookalike doesn’t hit you as hard as the carrot-thing did, so you live to see it stop.

“What’s going on now?” You ask Chara.

“If I remember rightly, these like to bully others. But they hate being picked on in return. So don’t pick on it I guess?”

“How would that help?!”

“I don’t know! Maybe if you’re nice it’ll let us go?”

You think for a moment, then open your mouth to say “I’m not going to pick on you.”

You can feel the sarcastic applause coming from Chara. But, just as they begin to ‘congratulate’ you for your ‘imaginative ideas’, the colour returns to the world and the Loox slinks away.

“Oh,” says Chara.

“Yeah, oh,” you repeat back to them. They begin walking again.

It feels really weird for your body to be moving around but you not being the one to do it. But you’re pretty happy to just watch the world go by.

At least, you’re happy to do that until the yelling starts.

***

“HUMAN! THERE’S A HUMAN!” You can hear them yelling in the distance. From the death, the looks of hatred, the attack, and now this? You’re concerned, to say the absolute least.

“Chara? Why are they yelling?”

“I don’t know.” You keep walking, but faster.

When you see a group of monsters beginning to close in on you, you begin to run.

You feel a sense of determination come from Cyan. You aren’t sure if SAVING mid-run was a good idea, but whatever. It’s done now.

Bullets are being thrown at you from all directions. The monsters don’t even bother taking you into formal battle. You feel them collide with Cyan’s skin, but you ignore it and keep running.

Cyan must feel it more than you. They cry out in pain, but you keep the mouth shut tightly and focus on running.

Soon, a bullet hits your head.

The world goes black.

‘CONTINUE’, ‘DO NOT’.

Chapter Text

‘CONTINUE’

You’re running again.

“Chara, did we just die again?”

“Yes,” you respond, ducking the bullet that killed you last time. Only to run into one at Cyan’s heart-height.

‘CONTINUE’

Duck, swerve, crash.

You run straight into a wall. You black out and are presumably killed shortly afterwards.

‘CONTINUE’

Duck, swerve the other way , trip, fall.

‘CONTINUE’

Duck, swerve, jump, run, collide with a tall furry figure.

You’re knocked backwards and land on your butt. You look up at what you just ran into.

It’s Asgore.

It’s Dad!

“Who’s that?” Cyan asks you.

“That’s my Dad, he’ll keep us safe,” you tell them.

He has a strange look in his eyes, though. You bring Cyan’s hands beneath you to push yourself upwards when you see a trident materialise in Asgore’s hands. You lower yourself back to the ground, confused.

“Forgive me, human,” he says quietly to you. He aims the trident at you and slams it downwards.

***

“He’ll keep us safe?” you ask Chara in the Void. “Him? We’re dead again because of him!”

“I have no idea what just happened,” says Chara, “I don’t know why the monsters are trying to kill you. It wasn’t like that when I was alive. I swear they’re the nicest and kindest creatures you could ever meet.”

“They have a funny way of showing it,” you murmur as Chara presses ‘CONTINUE’ for what feels like the hundredth time.

“Yeah, I’m getting that impression too,” they respond, as they start running. You feel exhausted and each of the bullets hitting you feels like you’ve been shot with an actual gun. Chara doesn’t seem to notice as much, or if they do they aren’t showing it. They’re better at running than you ever were, and you can tell that the moment control gets handed back you’ll be spending ages trying to catch your breath.

If control is ever handed back.

You collide with Asgore again.

And again.

The next time, Chara tries hiding. It doesn’t work.

The next time Chara stops running entirely. They hold out your knife in front of them.

“Don’t get any closer! I’m armed!”

“What are you doing?” you ask. “I don’t want to hurt anyone!”

“Running and hiding hasn’t worked, so there might not be a choice.”

“Of course there’s a choice!”

But they show no sign of having listened to you. The first carrot comes towards you and is met with a slash of the knife.

It makes the world go grey. It shoots bullets at you. Chara slashes it with the knife.

The carrot turns to dust.

You gained 6 EXP. Your LOVE increased.

“Huh?” both you and Chara say simultaneously. The momentary distraction is enough for a different carrot to bombard you with bullets.

The world goes black.

***

‘CONTINUE’

Cyan seems really uncomfortable with fighting back, so you don’t try it again. Plus, that weird voice freaked both of you out. You’re fine to not deal with that. So no LOVE increases for you, whatever that is.

You have more important things to worry about now. Like trying to survive.

You die a few more times, mostly to Asgore, before you find a turning that grants you a reprieve.

There aren’t any monsters down this alleyway. You slump against the wall and slide to the floor, facing back the way you came so you can see if anyone follows you. You give Cyan back control of their body.

Immediately they’re gasping for breath and you have to help them recover. “Sorry,” you say.

“It’s okay, don’t worry,” they respond.

You sit there in silence (except for their breathing) for a few minutes. Then, a shadow falls over where you’re sitting. You jump up, clutching the toy knife, just in case you have to fight your way out, when the owner of the shadow comes into view.

“Child? Is that you?”

You hold the knife tighter. Asgore killed Cyan (and you) while barely hesitating. How can you be sure that Toriel can be trusted? You can’t.

She walks towards you. “You must be very afraid. You do not need to be scared of me. I will not harm you.” She holds up her hands (paws? You don’t think you’ll ever decide) in a placating manner, to show she that she’s unarmed.

You decide to test the waters. “They’re trying to kill me.”

“I know. And they should not be. You have not done anything to provoke them.”

Cyan wants to cry. You let them, allowing the tears to flow while you ask “Why are they trying to kill me?”

“It is a long story my child, although the short answer is grief. However, if you put the knife down I will try my hardest to keep you safe.”

Despite your instincts, you drop the knife.

She’s your mother. You want to trust her.

She holds out her paw-hand and you place Cyan’s hand in it. She leads you back to your old family home.

Chapter Text

Nobody tries to attack you when you're with Toriel. They seem to respect her, and leave you both alone.

The cottage looks the same as it used to. Asgore doesn't seem to be nearby.

Toriel leads you into the old dining room and sits you down at the table. At first, it's a shock when your feet don't reach the floor. Then you remember that you're in Cyan’s body, and they're seven.

“Chara, can I have my body back now?” they ask. You don't respond, opting instead to just hand control over to them. You don't really want to look around your own home much. Besides, you know you can take the lead the moment you need to.

Not that you'd do much better than Cyan would if you get attacked again.

“Child, my husband is currently outside searching for you. If you stay here, then I will be able to intercept him when he returns.”

“Why are they trying to hurt me?”

“...That is a rather complicated matter that -”

You hear the main door open. Toriel hears it too and, with only a moment’s hesitation, rushes over to the hallway.

“Is that him, Chara?”

“I think so.”

***

You're scared of the big furry man. Asgore, was it? Chara said he was their father, but Chara’s human. So that can't be entirely true. They definitely used to trust him though, which would explain why they're so confused now.

You wish they hadn't dropped your knife. Having it would make you feel better, if anything.

The voices in the hallway are getting louder. Not closer-louder, but shouting-louder.

“They never used to fight like this,” says Chara. “It doesn't make any sense! Why did he kill us?”

Somehow, you feel like that last bit was just them talking to themself.

Now the voices are getting shouting-louder and closer-louder. You slide off your chair and stand facing the door. Chara considers running into the kitchen to hide, or to find something to defend yourself with. You don't think there's any point.

The door opens.

He sees you.

Stares.

The sight of him filling the doorway gives you a small sense of determination.

Toriel grabs his shoulder, but he shrugs her off.

He’s suddenly holding a massive trident.

The colours fade from your surroundings.

A pale blue heart appears in front of you.

He aims.

Strikes.

You can't move.

***

‘CONTINUE’

He strikes, they die.

‘CONTINUE’

He strikes, they die.

‘CONTINUE’

Again

‘CONTINUE’

And again.

‘CONTINUE’

Sometimes you hit it, sometimes they do. Wordlessly you both keep going, desperately trying to move their SOUL at least a little.

‘CONTINUE’

You wonder what your ‘RESET’ option meant. You wonder why Cyan doesn't have it.

‘CONTINUE’

They're getting tired. You can feel it.

‘CONTINUE’

You can't let them give up. You don’t know what ‘RESET’ meant, but you've got a pretty good idea what’ll happen if they press ‘DO NOT’.

‘CONTINUE’

They're just a kid. And you've kinda grown to like them a little. You don't want to see them dead. Not permanently.

‘CONTINUE’

It's an endless cycle of hurting caused by SAVING at just the wrong moment. It had only been a little bit of determination.

‘CONTINUE’

Apparently it had been enough.

‘CONTINUE’

And it doesn't look like it's lasting.

‘CONTINUE’

You and Cyan stand in the Void. You've lost count of how many times they've died. How many times your father has killed them. It would appear that they have, too. They face you for the first time. There are tears in their eyes and their hands are clenched into fists.

“I can't keep doing that.”

“What else are we going to do?” you ask.

They glance at the as-yet-unpressed option.

“No.”

They look back at you.

“No, you can't.”

“If I go back, he'll just kill me again. There’s no point! Why bother?”

You search hard for something to say. “What about your Mum? Isn't she coming to find you?”

They shake their head. “If she didn't show up the last gazillion times, she won't show up now.”

“She might. You just need to be patient. Isn't that what you're good at?”

“Time gets turned back to the moment he enters the room. There's no way she could make it in that time, anyway.”

“You'll die if you press that button.”

They shrug, turn, and reach their hand out.

‘DO NOT’

***

You don't see what disappears first.

Whether it was the options, or Cyan themself.

But in the time it takes to blink, they're gone.

You're alone.