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Hugo sat next to a window. It was pretty high up, almost one of the highest ones in the castle. The sky was a bright blue with the sun shining, no clouds in sight to block it. It was warm despite the breeze from the height. And yet, despite the perfect weather, Hugo couldn't help but feel like absolute shit. And yeah, he knows that if he's upset he should talk to Varian. He knew that but… but it was so stupid. He shouldn't have to bother Varian with something like this.
He looked down at the city below him, bright and bustling with happy people chatting and help each other with Maker knows what. Nothing like Ingvarr. No, about this time it would get just warm enough for the snow to melt and for the remaining water to just leave it cold and wet. People would be grumbling about their boots getting soaked and if he was still out on those streets he would probably get a few kicks for being in the way.
Sure, to the average person it may sound miserable. But to Hugo, it was all he knew before… this. Before he had met his first real friends and the love of his life. Before that same love of his life, despite all belief in Hugo's mind made him think he would leave, asked him to move into the Coronan castle. To, for once, make a truly honest living as the Official Archivist of the Eternal Library as well as the Co-Royal Engineer of Corona. And somehow, despite having the literal life of his dreams, he still missed it. He missed the assholes he had to work with and… "Hey sweetheart." He turned around quickly, Varian. He was leaning against the door frame with a smug look on his face, "yknow, I thought I would've found you in the library…"
Hugo turned back to the window as Varian walked in the room to sit next to him. "It seems I've lost my touch. Didn't even hear you come in…" Varian hums as he finally settles down, "So my lovely goggles, what can I do you for?" he puts on a smirk, "Team idiot set something on fire again? Can't figure out a formula?"
Varian gave him a look, raising an eyebrow at his clear mask of emotions. After a pause of Hugo not speaking, Varian filled the silence, "So.. what's up?" Hugo tried to laugh the question off but Varian beat him to it, "Don't lie to me. I know something's wrong. You never just hide away like this, especially not somewhere like this. So I'll ask again, what's up?"
And—despite how much Hugo tries to deny it—he can't ignore Varian. He sighs, leaning his head against the wall farthest from Varian, "It- It's stupid really." Varian raised an eyebrow, opening his mouth to respond before Hugo cut him off, raising his head again, "And I know what you're gonna say! 'it's not stupid if it's bothering you like this.' But I swear, it's not that serious. I'll be ok and you don't need to worry about it."
Varian looks at him for a moment longer, then leans his head on Hugo's shoulder, "Alright. Well, I won't force anything and if you say it's ok then I trust you and it's ok. But if you want to talk. About this or anything else. I'm here. I promise." Varian stayed on his shoulder, turning slightly to kiss it before returning to look out at the town with Hugo.
After a few minutes, Hugo moves his hand to intertwine with Varian's. Varian smiles up at him briefly, kissing his cheek and staring for just a moment. Hugo looks back and smiles. And after a few moments of this eye contact, he can't seem to look away. He can't… not talk. "I think I'm just…" it feels impossible to explain, but with Varian looking at him. With him looking at him like that, he knew he couldn't stop himself, "I think I'm feeling homesick? It feels dumb… I have literally all I've ever wished for. This is my life's dream and yet. Haha…" the laugh was almost self depricating, "and yet here I am, wishing to be back to the shit life I had before." The silence feels suffocating, so Hugo tries to save himself, "Like, I love being here and having you and I know I would never go back there in a million years but-"
"I think I get it." Varian cuts him off, "It's… hard. Being here. And… well I've never really told anyone this cause, I agree, it does feel weird. But, but sometimes I miss working with the Saporians." Hugo looks at him, eyes wide with shock. "Yea, I know. It sounds crazy but… but after a long day of arguing with Freddie or Nigel yelling at me. Sometimes it just feels like it would be better to be around them. They treated me with what felt like respect, they listened and it felt like they understood me. So I guess… I guess I just mean to say. I get it. You don't have to explain it to me and I-yea I get it and I'm here." Varian squeezes Hugo's hand and looks at him—really looks. He seems like something's been lifted from his chest, relieved almost but not quite happy.
As Hugo reflected on Varian's words, tears began to form in his eyes, Hugo looked back up to Varian, smiling slightly, "Thanks Bluebird. It's… It's nice to know that someone understands. That I don't have to fully explain for you to get it."
This time, Hugo moves his head to lay on Varian's shoulder, and Varian moves his free hand into Hugo's hair. "Of course my love. We could, if you want, maybe… maybe we could plan a trip to Ingvarr? Just for a few days..?"
Hugo leaned into the hand in his hair, thinking about that idea. He hums thoughtfully, "That… That sounds nice honestly. I think we might wanna wait a few months, everything in Ingvarr right now is… honestly it's miserable." He laughed genuinely, reminiscing of his home, "The snow's just melted and everyone is just pissed about that. But, yea. A trip to Ingvarr sounds nice. A break from work… with you." He smiles up at his boyfriend, moving to kiss him, soft and slow. Varian leans in quickly, the both of them turning to face each other fully. Varian moves his hand to Hugo's cheek, pulling him ever closer. But, before he knows it, Hugo is pulling away, "I love you Var… thank you. For everything."
Varian smiles softly down at him, "Of course darlin'. Always." And sure, maybe Hugo still feels slightly homesick, his home hundreds of miles from him. Yet, his new home seemed to be right here. Right in Varian's arms.