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Are you a good person?

Summary:

"Hey DD, can I ask you a question?"

"What?" Daredevil responds gruff, but not unkind.

"Well I was thinking about stuff, and, uh. Do you think you're a good person?"

Daredevil sits there staring, but not actually staring out into space for a long moment before responding.

"No."

And then he jumps off the building into the night below.

Or

Peter parker and his never ending guilt complex try and find some answers

Notes:

This is my first fanfic that I've actually finished. I hope you like it, and sorry for any poor grammar

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

"Hey DD, can I ask you a question?"

Spider-man and daredevil were sitting on a rooftop in hells kitchen trying to spot some criminal activity double d heard about. Peter was trying to respect the rules of stake-outs with DD, and be quiet and still and all that, but, well, his brain wasn't shutting up.

"What?" Daredevil responds gruff, but not unkind.

"Well I was thinking about stuff, and, uh. Do you think you're a good person?"

Daredevil sits there staring, but not actually staring out into space for a long moment before responding.

"No."

And then he jumps off the building into the night below.

---------

Peter and Tony are in the lab, It was a Saturday which always meant lab days,
When Peter decides to ask the question.

"Hey Tony? Do you think you're, like, a good person?"

Tony straightens up from where he was working to look at Peter.

"Repeat that for me kid?"

Peter fumbled a bit before responding.

"Do you think you're a good person? Like generally speaking. This wasn't directed at you specifically or anything, even though I asked you specifically. I was just curious, I guess."

Tony sniffed the air

"You've been getting into philosophy or something?"

"Uh yeah, something like that."

Tony thinks it over a bit before responding, "Well kid, I don't really know what to tell you. I've done a lot of really fucked up things in the past, and while I've been trying to make things better I'm not sure I'll ever feel comfortable calling myself a good person." Tony pauses to think for a second. "But hey, I'm trying, that has to count for something right?"

Peter mulls this over, then decides to drop it.

"I- yeah. Yeah. Thanks Mr Stark."

"Anytime kid. Now let's talk new suit design, yeah?"

"Oh! I was actually thinking about adding this new bit to the webshooters. If you look right here-"

Tony and Peter spend the rest of the afternoon working on Peter's suit until Happy drives him home, but Peter doesn't forget about the question, or Tony's response.

-------------

He finds Hawkeye on a rooftop.

"Hey spider-kid."

"Hey birdman."

"So" Peter says while he plops down next to Clint "got kind of a weird question for you."

"Hit me."

"Do you think you're a good person?"

Clint looks at Peter a tad bit taken aback before saying.

"What prompted that one kid?"

There's a thread of amusement in his tone but he also seems somewhat concerned. Weird.

"MJ's been getting me into philosophy stuff lately."

"Ok" Clint says clearly not quite believing him "Well, morality's kind of subjective, y'know? What could be good for me could be bad for you."

"That's such a non-answer, and also not what I asked."

"Honest answer?"

Clint fully turns to look at Peter, and Peter nods.

"I don't know Pete."

Clint picks up his binoculars and fully turns away to look through at the person he was stalking before Peter got there. Peter can't get anything more out of the older man about the subject, not for lack of effort mind you, then eventually swings back to his normal patrol.

He still thinks about it while working his way through New York.

-------------

He decides to ask Ned when he comes over after school.

"Neddd?"

"Yeah man?"

Ned looks up at Peter from the Lego model, their making another space ship today- something from star trek -Peter thinks, but he couldn't tell you which one. Not with how his head's been spun on lately.

"Do you think you're a good person?"

"Of course you're a good person man! You're, like, the best guy I know."

"That's not what I asked Ned."

Ned just levels him with a look that reminds Peter that, while Ned can be very oblivious, he's still Peter's best friend and has known him the longest out of anyone besides May.

"Yeah alright that's fair, but you're a good person too you know. "

Ned just grins at him.

"Thanks dude. I'm pretty great aren't I?"

Peter chucks a pillow at his head trying to be mindful of the Lego model in front of him.

-------------

Peter asks Steve and Bucky next. There in the gym when he finds them, Steve greets Peter with a "Hey queens" while Bucky just gives a simple nod.

"So, like, quick question for you, don't feel pressured to respond or anything if you don't want to-"
"kid out with it already."
"-Do you think you're a good person?"

Steve puts down the weights he's holding and turns to look at Peter, Bucky stills ever so slightly.

"It's uh for a school thing, before you ask."

"A school thing" Bucky says slowly.

"Yup" he pops the P.

"Well son that's a hard question, but I like to think I'm a good person, but there are some days that I really don't know."

"Hmm" peter hums while thinking it over.

"What about you Bucky?"

Bucky gives him a tight lipped smile.

"I don't think you want me to answer that one kid."

Peter leaves the gym that day no less confused and frustrated.

------------

He asks Natasha next.

"I've got a lot of red on my ledger webs, I've been trying to make up for but I don't think that's enough."

"So you don't think you're a good person?"

"I think that I'm trying, but no, I don't."

He doesn't even get to respond before she walks away.

------------

Sam Wilson is in his room just like FRIDAY said he'd be.

"So" Peter starts when Sam lets him in "Do you think you're a good person?"

Sam startles before relaxing and looking at Peter. There's a flash of worry that passes his face that he hides after just a second. Peter notices it. He just doesn't get it.

"Jeez we're really hitting it out the gate huh?"

"Sorry Sam I just-"

"No need to apologize Pete" Sam interrupts.

"Well let me ask you this. What do you think being a good person means? To you at least."

Peter's stands there taken aback before saying.

"Well I think it means trying your hardest to do the right thing."

"Do you think you're a good person then?"

"I- well- I. uh. I don't know."

“That's alright.” Sam pauses mulling something over before saying “Can I tell you what I think?"

"Go for it."

"I'm not sure there is such a thing as a 'good person', things aren't as black and white as that pete, there's a lot of gray. I think that the most we can do is apologize and try our best next time."

Peter stays quiet for a long moment before saying-

"What if we can't apologize? What if there's no one left to apologize to?" Peter's tone is quiet and slightly withdrawn. He hopes Sam doesn't notice.

"Then we try to do better next time. That's all anyone can ask for Pete."

--------‐----

After a long moment of deliberation over some slightly burnt pre-made lasagna, he asks May.

"Hey May?"

May looks up from the table "yeah baby?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

May puts her fork down and sighs, like she knew this was coming.

"Is it something about whether I'm a good person or not?"

"How did you-"

"Sam called me."

"oh-"

"And Tony and Clint and Steve. Plus the texts I got from Nat and Bucky. And Ned came over after school the other day to talk to me."

oh

The kitchens silent for a few seconds, the only sound being the traffic and general New York ambience coming in through the windows.
"Traitors" Peter mutters under his breath after he decides that the silence is too much.

"Peter-" May starts. She looks tired and more than worried. God, why does everyone look so worried lately?

"I'm fine aunt May."

"No you're not Peter. A perfectly fine Peter Parker doesn't ask that type of question to everyone he knows."

"It's wasn't everyone I know" he grumbles.

"Peter."

That gets Peter's attention. May was now using her "I'm very worried and need you to pay attention" voice. A voice seldom used for anything but spider-man activity, A voice she almost never used before Ben died.

"Is this about Ben?"

"No."

"Spider-man then?"

"No."

"Peter."

"I don't know, okay?"

May looks at him, then gets up to move over to him.

"Peter," she says, cupping his cheeks, "you know your uncle's death wasn't your fault, right?"

"This isn't-"

"Answer the question."

"Yeah, I know aunt May."

"Can you say it for me?"

"What?" Peter asks.

"I want you to say that Ben's death wasn't your fault."

"May-"

"Please Peter?"

"Uncle Ben's death was not my fault."

"Thank you" she says while placing a kiss on his forehead

"I love you honey."

"I love you too aunt May."

She walks over to her chair to grab her plate "Do you want to finish dinner while watching a movie? You get to pick what we watch, no bans this time."

"Yeah I'd like that."

--‐-------------------------

He and MJ are looking out over the city together. MJ decided a while ago that she doesn't like web slinging or being insanely high up, but she's fine with standing by the edge of a slightly taller than average building. So long as she doesn't have to let Peter carry her up. So long as she's with him.

"Got something on your mind Parker?"
She bumps into him with her shoulder. He hadn't even realized he was spacing out before.

"I- yeah." He says "can I ask you a question?"

She doesn't respond, not really, just raises an eyebrow at him.

He sighs then manages to get it out
"Do you think you're a good person?"

MJ stares face blank. Then after a moment-

"That's a stupid question Parker"

"What?"

"You heard me" she says "That's a stupid question"

"Yeah I heard you but, how is that a stupid question?"

"Because it implies that good people exist."

"What? " Peter says, completely baffled.

"Ok" she sighs "what do you think a good person is then?"

"Someone who tries their best."

"There are a lot of people who try their best but are still pretty shity."

"Ok, so someone who's done a lot of good things."

"Alright then is there some kind of quota of good deeds you have to meet before you can consider yourself a good person?"

"Well no but-"

"What is it then?"

"I don't know what you want from me Em!"

There's a pause before Peter turns to face the skyline again.

"Sorry for yelling"

"Sorry for pushing"

Peter turns to look at her and she's frowning at him. He feels like shit for it.

"I'm just trying to make you understand that worrying over whether someone, especially yourself, is good or not, is really damn stupid."

"So what? Being good is pointless?" Peter knew that wasn't what she was saying, but he was sick of people not answering the damn question.

"Not what I said Peter and you know it. I'm saying you shouldn't worry about being a 'good person', but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to do good things.”

He looks over at the skyline, staying quiet for a few minutes. MJ doesn't say anything more, she just waits.

“what does it mean then?”

“It means you try, Peter. It means you don't let guilt eat you alive until you can't do anything. It means you get up, and you say sorry, and you move on. Because as long as you're here, as long you're alive, people are going to care about you and love you. And you have to try for them, if not yourself.”

“That was very well put”, Peter says.

“Thanks, I think about this stuff a lot.”

“Hey MJ?” Peter turns to fully look at her.

“Yeah Peter?” and she turns to look at him.

“I love you.”

"I love you too, loser.”

Notes:

You exist and therefore you deserve to be here. Take care of yourself