Chapter Text
They are halfway through the second season of The Inbetweeners, occasionally pausing the episode to make stupid comments or laugh loudly. It has become a tradition. Every Friday evening, when a new episode would come out, Will and James would be sitting across Will’s bed watching the show. Most shows didn’t represent the real British school experience, however this one did. That’s why they liked this tradition so much, or maybe they just liked each other's company.
James throws his head into his palms and lets out an exaggerated groan for the seventh time this episode. Meanwhile, Will was throwing his head back in laughter, mostly at James' reaction. ‘This episode is so…’ James trails off, disgusted by yet another weird thing Jay had uttered. Though Will couldn’t agree more, yet laughing at James’ misery is just so much more fun. When Will’s laughter finally quiets down, they continue the episode.
The episode had finished half an hour ago, they had slipped into casual conversation. They started off talking about the episode, but they quickly ended up talking about their own school lives, football training, their friends, annoying teachers, when they were called down for dinner.
James loves dinner at Will’s house, it is more peaceful, in a way, than at his own house. His parents had been fighting more recently. As a result they also seemed less interested in their children's lives. He loves his parents, but it did make being at home less fun. On the contrary, Will’s parents love hearing about their lives. Will doesn’t particularly like telling his parents about his life. However, James loves talking about what they had been up to that week.
James leaves after dinner, they had no good excuse to have him stay, seeing as they already finished the episode. James thanks Will’s parents for having him, as Will walks him to the front door. They give each other a hug and wish each other a good weekend. Will lingers at the door, watching James walk into the night, until he finally turns the corner.
———
At school the next week, Will and James join their friends at the lunch table. Some of them are talking about the episode, having also seen it. They had quickly figured out about Will and James’ tradition, when they were basically making the same points a few weeks ago. Yet neither of them had suggested expanding the watchparty. It was no secret that they had a special friendship. They had been joined at the hip since the first day of secondary school, having become friends way before the friend group started.
———
That following Friday, they sprint up the stairs after dinner. They had only been halfway through the episode when dinner was ready. They lie down, sprawled across the bed while continuing the episode. Somewhere during the episode, Will starts absentmindedly playing with James’ hair. Fidgeting. It doesn’t happen often but not nearly seldom enough for James to be bothered by it. The credits start to roll and James lets his head fall into Will’s hands, smiling up at him. ‘That was so stupid.’ He laughs, referencing the episode. Will smiles back at him and starts telling James his thoughts.
They end up laying parallel, facing each other. Chatting about two lads at school. The Inbetweeners long forgotten. ‘No, but they seem so cute together. Imagine how fun that must be, being able to kiss your best friend.’ Will rambles. Two friends a year above them had recently gotten together.
Somehow, they had ended up talking about them. James hums agreeingly. ‘Like.. honestly, we should kiss.’ Will joked playfully. A beat. Will switches his focus between James’ eyes. James does the same. The joke was gradually becoming more serious. Will leans in and starts kissing James slowly, and it takes a second before James kisses back. Will’s lips are soft against his mouth.
James takes it in, before his thoughts come flooding in. Oh, my God, he’s kissing Will. He’s kissing a boy. James is not gay. Somewhere along the line, he had stopped kissing back. He pushes Will away, eyes wide with shock. He meets Will’s eyes, pupils blown wide open, he looks slightly worried, scared almost, but mostly elated. James needs to get out of here, he wants to run.
So, he does. He runs out of the room, down the stairs. He scans the living room, Will’s parents are watching a movie. They look up, but James is already out the door before they could say anything. The door slams shut behind him. The cold air hitting him like a brick, he’s glad he hastily grabbed his coat. He takes a deep breath, stuffing his hands deep in his pockets, his mind’s still racing. He sprints home.
———
Tears are pricking behind Will’s eyes. He fucked up. He fucked up so bad. Shit, shit, shit. Fuck, he shouldn’t have kissed him. Why did he do that? He fucked up their entire friendship. For what? A kiss? Why did he do that? He pulls his knees up to his head. He can’t cry, he did this himself. He starts sobbing. He hears his mum walk up the stairs. She knocks on the door before letting herself in. ‘Are you okay, darling? What happened?’
‘Leave me alone.’ Will screams, looking up at her. Tears are streaming down his face. She doesn’t deserve that. He knows he doesn’t deserve that. She had done nothing wrong. He had been the one to fuck everything up. He just can not deal with this right now.
‘Okay, darling. We’re here for you, okay?’ His mum replies, closing the door behind her. She sounded worried. Will sobs even harder. He’s a terrible son. He fucked up badly. He had driven James away, he must think he’s a freak. James was his best friend, he had been with him through everything. God, why did he kiss him.
A while later, he has mostly calmed down. The tears have stopped. He takes a few deep breaths and looks around his room. A phone laying on his nightstand, laying next to his. James had forgotten his phone in his hurry. He’ll give it back to him next Monday, if he even would want to look at Will.
———
When he came home, he was told he had to pack his bags. They were moving. Moving away, he doesn’t know where. His mum did not look happy. He had to hurry up. They were leaving as soon as possible. He grabbed as much as he could. He looks around his room, as he spots a plushie. It’s a bunny, Will and he had bought it together a few years back. They shared custody over it, before it ultimately ended up living with James. Will had said that James might need it. He didn’t know what that was supposed to mean. He still doesn’t. It is sitting on his bed. He walks out the door and leaves the bunny.
He joins his mother waiting at the front door. She tells his sister to hurry up before loading his bags into the car. ‘Coming.’ she shouts back. James watches, as she walks down the stairs. It looks like she doesn’t really know what’s happening either. She seems upset. Scared even. James doesn’t know where his dad is, surely he has to go with them.
Only when his mum, sister and himself had left the city, is when he realised he had forgotten his phone.
———
James didn’t show up at school that Monday. Nor that Tuesday, or any other day. None of his friends knew where he went. Not even the teachers.
Will vowed never to act on his queerness again. From now on he was straight. He was never gonna kiss a boy ever again.
He put everything that reminded him of James in a box and put it away. His jumper he had forgotten a few weeks ago, photos of them that had previously hung on Will’s wall, birthday cards addressed to Will. Everything.