Archive of Our Own

The sun shone on the little pond behind the barn, golden and shimmering in the sunlight that cast over its ripples. The air was warm and thick with a soft summer breeze that made Rainbow’s dyed hair stick against her cheeks. She peeled the strands off her skin and shifted her gaze to the girl sitting in the grass next to her.

Blonde hair and sun-kissed skin. Something she’s seen almost every day these past few weeks. She’d practically spent her whole summer at the farm. Most of the time with some weak excuse of having nothing else to do, unsure if Applejack fell for it or was just playing along. Either way, she got to see her, even if it was unbearable having to constantly see her without being anything more– with the knowledge they might never even be more. They’ve been friends for years now and Rainbow couldn’t tell her how she felt if it meant losing them. Even if it meant having to continuously hide and pretend and lie. Applejack hates lies, she knew that, but maybe this time she'd hate the truth more.

But god Rainbow was so far gone. The moments she didn’t spend with Applejack were still filled with thoughts of her. She couldn't get herself to stop thinking about her, no matter how hard she tried. It was driving her fucking insane. Every time she saw the scar on her knee from when they crashed their bikes into each other. Every time she saw that shirt that she wore on that day they went swimming in the lake. Stained from the damp grass Rainbow threw it on before jumping into the cold water. Every time she lay in her bed that Applejack fell asleep in last week. It wasn’t even only her own memories that made her think of her– every time she saw someone with long blonde hair or stupid cowboy boots or even freckles for fuck’s sake, she’d be reminded of her.

She’d tried so hard to ignore the feeling, to push it away, to shove it down, to bury it somewhere she’d never be able to reach. Yet every time Applejack smiled, every time she talked to her, every time she so much as saw her, her heart lit up like a lighthouse, making it impossible to ignore.

And today, she’s invited herself over again.

Rainbow ran her eyes over Applejack. She sat on her heels, fiddling with two wicker baskets that Applebloom had gotten stuck together.

Rainbow leaned against the wooden fence, arms crossed with a wide grin plastered across her lips. She tried to act casual but that annoying beat beneath her ribs started to pick up again and her eyes kept wandering off towards the girl beside her.

She was wearing a fucking tank top. It made sense, it was the beginning of August after all, the temperature was literally high enough to burn your skin on the asphalt. Still, it felt taunting. The blistering sun pooled over Applejack’s bare shoulders and Rainbow couldn’t tear her gaze away from the muscles flexing in her arms every time she moved. She wore her stupidly cute hat again, like always, and those cute denim shorts, the fabric washed and fraying at the ends. And here she was in some fuckass soccer jersey and jorts.

Applejack’s brows were furrowed and her lips were pressed together in concentration. She set the baskets in her lap, making her loosely tied braid fall over one shoulder and her hat tip forward a bit. Rainbow's heart fluttered.

“Need some help there, cowgirl?” She asked with a smirk on her lips.

“Don’t start Dash.” Applejack muttered through gritted teeth without looking up.

Rainbow put her foot up against the fence and shrugged. “Just offering help.”

Applejack gave her a disapproving look “Sure you are." She muttered as she shifted her attention back to the basket. Rainbow wasn't even been paying attention to what Applejack was doing- or saying anymore, too busy relishing in delight at her annoyance

A flash of movement made her whip around. Applejack had finally separated the baskets. An exasperated sigh left her lips. “Finally.”
She stood up and dusted off the grass blades that clung onto her knees. The baskets swung as she turned around and held one of them out towards Rainbow.

Rainbow pushed herself off the fence. Her eyebrows drew together, eyes flicking from the basket to Applejack’s face.

“What are we doing?”

Applejack shoved the basket in Rainbow’s hands. “It’s for the berries? I just told you?”

Rainbow squinted in confusion, staring at the basket in her hands. “Berries?” She asked, her voice becoming softer with uncertainty.

Had she been staring at Applejack that long? When did she tell her about berries? She tried to scramble something together but the unwavering gaze Applejack had over her didn’t help either. It felt weirdly intimidating.

Applejack crossed her arms, though her lips curved up slightly. “You’re here to help me right?”

That wasn’t really the reason she came here– it never was, but it was the perfect excuse. Plus, she never minded helping if it meant she got to spend time with Applejack. So, whenever Applejack asked her to help Rainbow just went along with it even if she got home with sore muscles and heavy eyelids every day.

Rainbow responded with a confident nod. Applejack didn’t seem convinced. She sighed and gestured for Rainbow to follow her.

They trailed off onto a rough trail between towering trees and tall grass, the sun sizzled through the canopy of leaves, playing on their skin every now and then. Their shoes got caught in tree roots, and dirt covered the soles. Leaves brushed against their fingers as they pushed low hanging branches aside and the sound of their laughter echoed through the treetops. They reached a small field surrounded by thorny, blackberry bushes. Rainbow's eyes travelled across the clearing, the grass was adorned in an array of wildflowers, scattered like colors on a paint palette. The bushes that circled the field were dotted with blackberries ranging from plump navy ones to not fully ripened pinks and greens.

“Granny’s plannin’ on makin’ jam out of ‘em.” Applejack said, nodding towards the blackberries, then turning around to face Rainbow behind her.

Rainbow, for once, had no response in return, her eyes went wide as she took in her surroundings. How has she never been to this part of the farm yet?

Applejack laughed softly at her daze, already walking over to the nearest shrub. “You gonna help me or what?”
Rainbow blinked, trying to shake off the hazy feeling. She tightened her fingers around the handle of her basket, quickly following Applejack who had already begun picking berries.

She placed herself next to Applejack and started reaching for the berries on her own side. Rainbow had spent her whole summer break helping Applejack with chores since Applejack was often too busy to do anything else, but they’d never done this before for some reason.

They spent the following moments in silence. Rainbow tried to come up with anything to start a conversation, but all she could think of was Applejack’s presence beside her. They were close enough that their shoulders almost brushed and Rainbow was hyperaware of every little movement Applejack made. She watched the steadiness of Applejack’s hands and the way her brows knit in concentration, the way she tucked the loose strands that escaped her braid behind her ear– fuck Rainbow wished she was the one doing that. 

Lost in thought, Rainbow’s hand hovered uselessly over the vine.

“You need help or somethin’?” Applejack’s voice broke through the silence and Rainbow nearly jumped out of her skin. She recovered quickly by dusting off her shirt.

She scoffed. “No. ‘Course not, I’m capable of picking fruit AJ.” 

Just to prove her point, she leaned forward to grab another one. “Ow- fuck.” Rainbow jerked backwards, holding her scratched hand. Applejack finally glanced over and tilted her head. “You were sayin’?”

“Shut up.” Rainbow gave Applejack a shove against her shoulder. Applejack chuckled and returned her attention to picking berries for a second before she spoke again. “You ever done this before?”

Rainbow’s eyes flicked to Applejack. “Done what?”

“Pickin’ berries.”

A shrug. “Nah, maybe when I was a kid or somethin’, I dunno.”

Applejack nodded thoughtfully. “I can see that.”

Rainbow whipped her head towards Applejack, eyebrows shooting up. “What’s that supposed t-”

“You’re squishin’ them, you’re not supposed to grab them like that, you know.” Applejack turned to face Rainbow again and nodded towards the blackberries in Rainbow’s basket.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “You’re making jam out of them anyways,” she continued, grabbing another berry in her own way. “So… it kind of doesn’t matter, if you think about it.” She quipped, glancing sideways at the blonde with a sly smile.

Applejack opened her mouth then forced it shut. She kept looking at her with her hands planted on her hips. When Rainbow reached for another berry Applejack caught her by the wrist. 

Rainbow’s shoulders tensed at the sensation of Applejack’s fingers on her skin. They were slightly sticky with blackberry juice and warm like the heat that rushed to Rainbow’s cheeks. Her eyes trailed off to Applejack’s face, she was met with lips drawn in a straight line and sharp green eyes. The only sound present was the rustling of the leaves and the humming of bugs around them. Rainbow’s breathing became heavier as if the thick silence pressed down onto her lungs. 

Applejack’s expression was unreadable. Rainbow tried to put her features together into something that made sense, but she couldn’t seem to find the missing piece. Her heart sped up, eyes darting around uselessly, unsure of where to land– as long as they didn’t land on freckled cheeks and soft lips. Birds chirped overhead between the puffy clouds and Rainbow’s eyes followed the sound. She couldn’t look at Applejack or she’d do something incredibly stupid like confess her feelings. 

“Rainbow.” Applejack spoke, her voice low and strained. Rainbow's eyes returned to Applejack’s face.

“Yeah?” It came out softer than she intended. She hated herself for it.

“You gonna continue bein’ a brat or are you actually gonna be helpful?”

Rainbow’s shoulders sagged in relief– or disappointment. Maybe both. The moment disappeared like Applejack’s fingers around her wrist. Rainbow straightened up a bit and swallowed, trying to wash away the burning in her throat and the spinning in her stomach. 

“I’m always helpful.” She said, flashing a grin to try and cover the strain in her voice.

Applejack scoffed. “You’re such a bad liar.”

Rainbow’s brows shot up. “Says you, you’re way worse.”

“That ain’t an insult you know.”

“You used it as an insult first!”

“It ain’t an insult, it’s the truth.”

“Okay then. The truth. The truth is that you’re a worse liar than me.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Did I say I wasn’t?”

“No… but you didn’t admit it either.”

“Dash I swear to–”

“Alright, alright.” Rainbow backed away with her hands raised. “I’ll be helpful now. I swear.” 

A smug smile spread across her lips as she redirected her attention back to the berries, still grabbing them carelessly.

“Dash.”

“What.”

“What did I tell you.”

Rainbow pressed her lips together and reluctantly spun around again. She grinned lazily. “Oh… you were being serious?”

Applejack’s lips parted. “God- I cannot believe you.” She sighed, though a small smile tugged at her lips. “I’ll show you alright?” 

“Fine fine, if you insist.” Rainbow replied, bowing her head and gesturing towards the berries dramatically.

Applejack leaned in closer to the vine right in front of Rainbow. Rainbow should’ve taken a step back, she didn’t even think about it until–

Fucking hell.

Applejack’s arm was in Rainbow’s direct line of sight. The scattered freckles and the faded scars from years farm work against tanned skin were crystal clear now. If only she could just trace them and–

Jesus, what's wrong with her?

Applejack slid her fingers under the berry and gently tugged it off with her thumb, she peered over her arm at Rainbow. “See? You grab it like this so you don’t crush the damn thing.”

Rainbow rolled her eyes and shoved Applejack’s arm away. “I knew that… just wanted to piss you off.”

Applejack’s palm shot up to her forehead. “Tell me again why I asked you for help?”

Rainbow shrugged and tilted her head. “I don’t know… you tell me AJ… Seems like you just wanted me around.”

“I’ve seen you every damn day for the past 2 weeks, I think I’d manage without–”

“You just can’t help yourself. I mean I get it, it’s hard to stay away from me.”

Applejack took a deep breath. “You’re the one who keeps coming over and always tell me you're too tired to go home.”

“Because you make me do chores the whole day! It only makes sense.” Rainbow retorted, throwing her hands out in front of her to emphasize her words.

Applejack scoffed, “I make you do chores?” She turned her gaze away for a second, her jaw set tight, before returning to meet Rainbow's eyes.

“You never say no.”

“Maybe I don’t want to say no.”

Applejack’s expression fell as fast as Rainbow’s heart dropped. She tried to keep the teasing grin on her face as heat crawled up her neck, but Applejack’s silence made her ears ring. Applejack bit her cheek and for a second Rainbow thought she'd say the words Rainbow wanted to hear the most.

“Well… quit complainin’ then.” Applejack muttered, returning her attention back to the vines. “Let's just continue, we’re losin’ time.”

Rainbow couldn't help but feel disappointed at her lack of response. Maybe she was looking into everything too much.

Applejack's eyes landed on Rainbow again. “Do it correctly this time Dash.” She said with a soft, pleading smile before moving further away to an untouched area.

They carried on with their work for the rest of the afternoon and Rainbow actually put in the effort, at least for now. Their baskets grew heavier as they slowly cleared the field. The summer air was tiring and Rainbow was going through it all– Sweat rolling down her temples, hair sticking to her forehead, blackberry juice making the scratches on her skin sting, her arms reddening from the scorching sun, her throat dry as the parched grass beneath her dirty converse. But next to her was Applejack’s voice, her smile, just her and Rainbow thought to herself she could do this every day.

They were almost done collecting everything when Rainbow got an idea. She ran over to Applejack who’d ended up on the other side of the field. Her smile turned wicked as she planted her hands onto Applejack’s shoulders from behind, startling her into turning around. Her brows furrowed at Rainbow’s plotting expression.

“I have an idea…” Rainbow began, her voice mischievous, “why don’t we make this last part more… fun?”

Applejack pulled a displeased face and groaned. “Don’t even think-“

“A race. Whoever picks the most blackberries in five minutes wins.”

Applejack shook her head in disbelief. “You always gotta turn everythin’ into a competition. Tell me, you have a prize in mind already, don’t you?”

Rainbow crossed her arms and rocked on her heels. She shrugged. “Just an ego boost I guess.”

Applejack lifted her eyebrows. “You don’t need an ego boost, you're already–”

Rainbow cut her off. “Better do your best then huh farm girl?”

“You seriously wanna race me in my own-“

Again, Rainbow didn’t let her finish, already jogging backwards, waving her phone that she set on a timer. “5 minutes babe. Better start working!”

Rainbow arrived at a shrub a few meters away from where Applejack was standing and began picking– careless even after Applejack’s demonstration. Thorns scraped against her skin and berries fell to the ground because of her rash movements. She ignored the way her skin stung while throwing everything in her basket– leaves, twigs, she was pretty sure she saw a snail in there somewhere too. Her basket became an inky mess of black, pink and green berries being the result of her competitive mindset. The purple blackberry juice seeped under her nails and soaked into her fingertips like the way her nerves kept spreading like a bruise whenever she thought of Applejack. Her eyes darted over to her on the other side of the field. She caught herself and shook her head, clearing her thoughts and quickly averted her gaze back to the vines.

The basket soon turned into a bath of blackberries rising to the brim. Rainbow was just about to reach for a new one when her phone buzzed in her pocket. A grin spread over her face immediately, it was pretty clear she won even without looking at Applejack’s basket.

“AJ time’s over!” She yelled, already running towards her, her blackberries almost spilling out of the basket.

Applejack’s basket was perched beside her on the grass. Rainbow took a quick glance at it, which was enough to confirm her prediction– it was indeed less full, though it was less of a mess.

A pleased smirk spread across her lips as she shoved the basket under Applejack’s face, dropping her eyes to Applejack’s basket on the ground.

Her eyes found green ones again and were practically sparkling with glee. “Seems like I won.”

Applejack’s gaze trailed to the basket Rainbow was proudly holding in front of her, her face scrunched up as she squinted her eyes, travelling over the nearly overflowing basket. She looked at Rainbow again, slowly raising an eyebrow.

Rainbow’s ears heated up, feeling severely watched as Applejack scanned her and the mess in her hands. “What?”

“’Course you win if you don’t even bother pickin’ the ripe ones.”

Rainbow tightened her grip on the basket as she shoved it closer, the edges digging into Applejack’s tank top.

“No one said anything about ripeness or… whatever.” She replied, waving her hand dismissively and lifted her chin up, “It’s about the amount.”

Applejack crossed her arms firmly. “I thought you were tryin’ to help.”

“I did help.” Rainbow nodded at the basket with a smirk.

Applejack didn’t step back like Rainbow expected, instead she leaned in even closer, narrowing her eyes at her. “You hardly did anythin’ useful.”

Rainbow swallowed. She could smell the sunscreen on Applejack’s skin and her sweet shampoo travelling with the breeze, it made her feel dizzy. She quickly blinked the dazing feeling away.

“What? You mad I beat you in your own chores?” She said, her voice beginning to strain with nerves.

Applejack huffed a disbelieving breath. “You’re clearly not understandin’ what I’m sayin’ here huh?” 

Rainbow’s heart trashed at the sudden change of tone, she held her breath, trying to muster up a comeback.

Applejack mimicked Rainbow’s smirk from earlier, meanwhile the smugness of the colorful haired girl was swept away. “I think we all know who won in terms of chores Dash.”

The way her name came out of Applejack’s mouth sounded like a dare and the look that accompanied it was straight up unnerving. Rainbow’s heart dropped to her stomach, her shoulders pulled up higher at the sudden intensity of it all. Applejack leaned in even closer and Rainbow was sure she was gonna pass out any second now.

“Hm?”

“The race had nothing to do with chores.”

“Oh?” Applejack began, “So you ain’t here to help me?”

Rainbow leaned back slightly, unable to breathe normally with such proximity. “Don’t put words into my mouth AJ, I didn’t-“

Applejack’s laugh cut her off. Her eyes drifted towards the basket still stuck between them like it was the only thing keeping her from not closing the space entirely. She traced the rim of the basket with her finger and smiled knowingly. “I don’t know Dash, you’re literally handin' me proof.”

Rainbow stumbled backwards, quickly yanking the basket back.

“Quit it.” She hissed slightly out of breath, “Don’t try to turn this on me. I won.”

Applejack laughed while she crouched down to grab her own basket. 

“Sure. I’ll let you have this one.”

Rainbow’s fists clenched beside her. “I have it. There’s nothing to let me have.” She retorted, the irritation in her voice contradicting the growing flush on her face. “I have more berries, which means I won.”

Applejack sat cross-legged on the grass now, turned with her back towards her, inspecting some of her handpicked berries. A dismissive hum was the only response she gave.
Rainbow dropped down next to her on the grass, sitting on her heels. The basket wobbled slightly as she placed it next to Applejack’s.

“You’re acting like my blackberries are totally useless.”

Applejack turned her head towards Rainbow. “I ain’t sayin’ they’re useless, I just have more edible ones than you.”

Rainbow gasped. “These are all edible, you’re- you’re just narrowminded.” She said, pointing an accusing finger at Applejack.

The girl next to her laughed out loud, “Oh yeah?” the sound echoed through Rainbow’s ears. “You’re tellin’ me those are edible?” Applejack’s eyes flicked down towards the green berries.

Rainbow straightened up and nodded confidently. “Yes.”

Applejack’s expression shifted from calm to something that made Rainbow’s chest twist in regret. Applejack leaned back on her hands, a mischievous smile spread over her lips.

“Prove it.”

Rainbow swallowed nervously, the edge in Applejack’s voice made her shudder despite the scorching heat, though she couldn’t ignore the sudden thrill that washed over her either.

Applejack’s gaze stayed on Rainbow’s face, it made her want to run away. Rainbow stared back despite her racing heart and those annoyingly familiar nerves in her stomach that crept onto her like the suddenly chilly summer breeze against her neck.

Applejack cut through the silence. “You backin’ out?” she said, crossing her arms, awaiting a response.

Rainbow clenched her jaw, sending Applejack a sharp glare. “No-“

“‘Cause if you are, we can just settle it now, no need to eat,” Applejack gestured at the basket, “...that. It’s your choice sugarcube.” Applejack looked up with a knowing smile.

“Shut up.” Rainbow shot back, clutching her basket closer to pick one out.

Applejack leaned forward, hands planted in the grass in front of her, dirt dusting her fingers, eyes following Rainbow's. Rainbow’s fingers hovered over the black and blues. She could play it safe, she could–

“Don’t be a pussy,” Applejack pointed at a green berry in the corner, “unless… you wanna prove me right?”

Her words were electric– instead of shutting Rainbow off it fed the fire in her veins even further. Rainbow glared at her, lips drawing into a thin line as she hesitantly picked the lime colored one, wincing at the thought of eating it.

The thing that frustrated her the most wasn’t even the fact that the blackberry would taste disgusting– it was the fact that she brought this upon herself. The blackberry– if you could even call it that in this state– was just the fucking cherry on top.

Applejack’s eyes were pinned onto her, her lips slightly curved, patiently waiting for Rainbow to break, whether it was by admitting her loss or suffering through the sour taste on her tongue.

Well, it was the latter.

Rainbow shoved the blackberry in her mouth, forcing to keep her face straight, which lasted for about five seconds before the sour taste burst and spread the more she chewed, making her physically unable to control the way her face started to twist.

“Fucking-“ her nose wrinkled and her lips stitched together into a scowl. She fought the urge to just spit it out right then and there but that would, yet again, proof AJ right. So, she forced herself to swallow it which was followed by dramatic coughing.

She hadn’t even had time to look up at Applejack, until now, which was clearly a mistake.

Applejack sat there with the stupidest, most devious grin in the world like this was her biggest accomplishment in life.

“And?” She asked sweetly as if Rainbow’s face didn’t tell her everything.

Rainbow didn’t answer and just glared at her.

Applejack continued in that sickeningly sweet tone. “You want those in your jam? Because I can ask Granny to make a separate-“

Rainbow threw one of the unripe berries at Applejack.

“Fuck you.”

Applejack simply plucked the berry out of her lap and tossed it aside, still laughing despite the scowling girl in front of her.

“I take that as a no.” She said with that pleased smile remaining on her lips.

“I hate you.”

Applejack just smiled and tossed the most plump blackberry from her basket in her mouth.

What a fucking show-off.

Rainbow crossed her arms and decided she wasn’t going to be the only one to get called out. She could turn this around in a heartbeat.

“I thought we were supposed to be doing chores.” She remarked, a slight smirk reappearing on her face.

Applejack’s head snapped up, her eyes sharp with surprise.

“I mean… you were the one scolding me about not being helpful earlier,” Rainbow continued, slowly, “but now you’re the one playing games.” She tilted her head. “I don’t think that’s very helpful either huh AJ?”

Applejack’s pleased face dropped. Her eyes trailed off to the blackberry she threw aside earlier. “That’s– we were done already.”

Rainbow scoffed. “Bullshit,” she pointed behind Applejack, “there’s like a whole part over there we haven’t even covered yet.”

Applejack followed Rainbow’s gaze to the fully covered vines behind her. “Yeah, well-“

“Well what?” Rainbow planted her hands in the grass and leaned forward. Applejack’s eyes drifted off towards the soft rustle of the distant trees and the slight sway of the grass around her. Rainbow couldn’t seem to get her to look at her, but she noticed the tension in Applejack’s face. She wanted to know what it meant.

A heavy sigh escaped Applejack’s lips. “They can wait.”

Well, that was certainly new.

Rainbow’s brows furrowed. “Since when?”

Applejack faced Rainbow again, something raw flickered across her face. She took a deep breath and pressed her lips together. “I don’t know Rainbow, why does that even matter.”

Rainbow stared at her own fingers stained and scratched. The wine-like color of the berries was like blood against her skin, like a warning, a stop sign. She shoved those thoughts away quickly before looking up again.

“Well, your chores can never wait, you literally told me that like last week when I asked if you wanted to go to the pool.” Rainbow continued, “So I stayed here again.”

“You don’t have to stay. You know that right?”

“God, how many times do I have to tell you I want to? Or are you saying you don't want me to stay because I can leave AJ,” Rainbow’s eyes dropped to the ground, “if that’s what you want.”

Applejack’s eyes widened. “No Dash. God no.” Rainbow could hear the panic in her voice, “I didn’t mean it like that… I just-“ she cut herself off.

Another sigh from her lips. “This is different.”

Rainbow huffed a breath. “What’s that even supposed to mean?”

“It’s just… different… Jeez, what do you want from me?”

“I just want a clear answer.”

“To what exactly Rainbow?”

It was a good question and Rainbow knew exactly what she wanted an answer to, but how could she ask her best friend something like that?

“Just- tell me, what’s so different about this?” Rainbow asked, her voice dropping into a softer tone.

Applejack’s eyes were attached to the grass blades on her boots now, her hat slightly tipped forward, hiding her eyes. “It just is.”

“Oh my god. That’s not even an answer.” Rainbow groaned, running a hand down her face.

The obscurity of Applejack’s answers grew on her nerves and the scorching heat on her skin and around them only seemed to rise. Her palms were clammy and sticky and her mind spun with dizzying ideas. She tried to wipe her hands off on her shorts, like they’d erase her feelings too.

Applejack's jaw was set tight and her hands tangled in the grass tugging at it, letting the loose pieces slip free through her fingers.

“It’s nothin’ Dash, no need to get weird about it.” Applejack said, the muscles in her face tensened, still Rainbow noticed the uncertainty swaying like waves in her eyes.

“You’re the one being weird.”

Applejack didn’t seem to have a response to that. Her words were replaced by the faint rustle of the leaves and cicadas humming as the air slowly cooled down in the late afternoon sun, though the air between them felt excruciatingly heated, blazing almost, any word could set it aflame.

“What do you mean by different?” Rainbow tried once again.

Applejack tore her gaze away from the grass back to Rainbow, her expression was tight– forcefully so. “You’re still hung up on that?” She asked with a hint of exasperation in her voice.

Rainbow pursed her lips. “Yeah, because you made a big deal about it.”

“You’re the one makin’ a big deal outta it right now.” Applejack retorted as her arms shot out in front of her, emphasising her frustration.

“I’m not-“

Applejack groaned, pressing her fingers onto her temples. “Just- this conversation’s goin’ nowhere.” She planted her hands into the dirt, preparing herself to stand up. “Let’s just go, alright?”

Rainbow didn’t move. She didn’t want to leave, she didn’t want to keep pretending like every time things got heated it meant nothing all over again– maybe it really meant nothing, and maybe she was pushing it too far, but her doubt was drowned out by her growing curiosity. She couldn’t ignore the restlessness in Applejack’s eyes, the bouncing of her leg or the grass blades between her fingers.

Applejack was just about to push herself up, but Rainbow reached out, grabbed her wrist and pulled her down in one quick motion. Applejack gasped, stumbling forward until she landed on her knees in the grass.

“What the hell–”

Rainbow didn’t let go off her wrist, if anything her grip grew even tighter.

“Tell me what it meant.”

She finally met her eyes, that’s when Rainbow noticed how close they were sitting after she pulled her down. They both sat on their knees and Applejack’s were so close to her own, she could practically feel the heat radiating in between them.

“This is ridiculous.” Applejack muttered while making a weak attempt at getting out of Rainbow’s grip– she could’ve easily gotten free, but for some reason she didn’t put in the effort.

“It’s not. There’s something you aren’t telling me.” Rainbow replied, eyes still boring into Applejack’s as if they could break her and make the truth spill out.

“I don’t get why you're so caught up on knowin'.” Applejack responded, her face twisting with exasperation.

“So there is something!” Rainbow perked up, the sudden movement made her tug at Applejack’s arm, causing their knees to bump into each other. She sucked in a breath at the feeling of Applejack’s skin against hers.

It was literally the smallest touch, if it was anyone else Rainbow wouldn’t even have noticed or cared for that matter– but this wasn’t just anyone, it was Applejack, her fucking best friend who she couldn’t stop thinking about, who she couldn’t stop wanting no matter how hard she tried. She wanted to move away, to extinguish the burning feeling that spread over her whole body, yet she stayed utterly still.

Applejack on the other hand made no effort to move either, her eyes dropped to the total lack of space between them, then they wandered off to Rainbow’s fingers around her wrist.

“Damn, your hands are dirty.” She chuckled softly, all of the tension in her face disappearing at once.

Rainbow blinked, shoving her shameful thoughts away.

What the fuck.

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“It’s stickin’ to my skin.”

“So?“

“How’d you even get so much on your hands?”

“Hard work.”

“Yeah right. It’s just called bein’ careless.”

Rainbow gritted her teeth and gave Applejack’s arm a pull, closing the distance between them even more. “How about you start being more careless and tell me what the fuck’s going on?”

Applejack’s eyes blew wide as her cheeks flushed. The gentle breeze made the loose strands of her hair wisp and Rainbow had to fight the urge to tuck them behind her ear again.

“I can’t… I can’t just tell you.” She answered, which Rainbow raised her eyebrows at.

“Why…?”

The blonde pressed her lips together, squeezing her eyes shut for a second. “Jeez Rainbow, you ain’t lettin’ this go are you?”

“I just don’t understand.” Rainbow continued, eyes wandering off somewhere behind Applejack.

“That’s the thing.”

“What?”

“Why I can’t tell you dumbass.”

Rainbow laughed weakly, running a hand through her hair. “C’mon AJ, you know you can tell me anything.”

Applejack shook her head. “Not this.”

Rainbow studied her face. The tightness of her jaw and the way her eyes didn’t fully meet Rainbow’s, the sharpness of her cheekbones and those freckles that were even more prominent in the summer. If only Applejack would just tell her what went on behind her pretty face.

Rainbow exhaled, eyes darting back to her basket. “That doesn’t even make-“

“Because it really don’t make sense okay?” Applejack snapped, her voice scratchy with frustration. Rainbow’s heart sunk in her chest.

“AJ what-“ Rainbow started, but her words faltered. Her brows knitted together in worry at the sight of Applejack’s distressed face, she loosened her grip on her wrist.

“AJ?” She breathed, “What’s going on?” Applejack’s eyes were glued to the patch of grass between them, keeping them apart. 

Rainbow let her arm go, leaving faint purple fingerprints behind. “Fine. You don’t have to tell me.” She ran a hand through her hair again, “I just want you to know– whatever it is that you can’t tell me– we can figure it out or I could at least try because-“

“What if it’s you?” Applejack cut through, eyes still lowered and voice nearly a whisper. Rainbow’s head snapped up. She must've misheard her.

“Me– What?” Her voice sounded raspier than usual. "What are you-"

“The reason,” Applejack turned her head sideways, clenching her jaw before she spoke again, “why it’s different.”

Rainbow remained silent, her ability to form words were crushed by the weight of Applejack’s.

“What… do you mean?”

“Oh my god.” Applejack forced a laugh, “You’re so oblivious.”

Rainbow’s chest tightened, she felt like she was about to suffocate.

“You- you don't even know what you’re doin’ to me every day you show up again and again and–.” Applejack pressed her palms into her eyes. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“AJ-”

“I could just kiss you right now,” Applejack looked at her, “if you’d let me.”

Rainbow’s heart stopped.

This had to be a fucking joke. She was fully convinced Applejack would just burst out laughing any moment now.

“Can I?”

Rainbow tried to process Applejack’s words, tried to make sense of them, tried to find the joke, the trick, the catch. She went through every possibility that could make this mean something other than the obvious.

“I- what.” Rainbow started and looked at the girl in front of her, eyes big with fear and utter disbelief.

What was she even supposed to say now?

Hell yes?

She’s wanted this for so long, but now that she heard the words she’s always wanted to hear it felt like her mind was playing tricks on her. She wasn’t even sure if Applejack was serious– maybe Rainbow was finally bearing the consequences of her endless jokes and stupid pranks and was getting a full, heart stopping, payback from Applejack now.

Her throat tightened, the dryness felt suffocating. She let out a shaky breath before attempting to speak.

“Okay… Real funny AJ, this is a joke isn’t it? You really got me there for a sec.” A humourless laugh escaped her lips, “So… this would be a great time to like laugh now.”

Applejack didn’t laugh. She looked up at Rainbow at last, eyes flicking between Rainbow’s. “This ain’t a joke Dash."

Rainbow nearly choked on her breath. “It- It isn’t?”

Applejack shook her head, lips pursed like she was holding her breath. Those same goddamn nerves returned to Rainbow’s stomach. She felt sick and ecstatic and anxious and she didn't know what to do with it. Her eyes dropped to the ground. She blinked a few times, trying to stop her head from spinning and her heart from racing so fast it felt nauseating.

The silence seemed to creep up on Applejack, she winced at the lack of response. “Dash– are you… Please say somethin'. You don't have to–“

Rainbow eyes snapped up. “You can,” she answered barely audible, “you can kiss me.”

Relief made its way onto Applejack’s face, though she didn’t give in yet. “You... you sure?” She asked gently. Rainbow’s heart ached at the softness of her voice.

The tension and seriousness of it all was too much for her too handle so she quickly straightened up and swallowed.

“I sure as sugar am.” She imitated Applejack's accent, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees and a smirk on her lips.

The green eyes in front of her widened in surprise followed by genuine laughter. “You seriously mockin’ me now?”

Rainbow snorted, unable to hide the fondness on her face. “Just had to make sure you understood.”

Applejack shoved her shoulder playfully, letting her hand linger there as she bit her lip nervously. “No but seriously Dash.“

Rainbow’s grin was replaced by a steady gaze. “I am serious.”

Her eyes dropped to the ground for a second before she looked up at Applejack again. “Are you though?” She asked, “Because if this means nothing to you… or– or this is just like a spur of the moment kind of thing… like maybe you think it’ll be fun or something– which it would be, don’t get me wrong… but I don’t think I could do it if-“

“Dash.” Applejack dug her fingers into her shoulder. “You think this means nothin' to me?”

Rainbow’s breath was shaky as she replied, “I- I don’t know… I just thought-”

“Well, don’t” Applejack’s eyes met hers again, sincere in a way that made Rainbow’s heart stutter. “I like you Dash. Is that so hard to believe?”

Applejack’s words struck Rainbow like lightning. She didn't know why it was so hard for to believe, it all just felt like a dream, too good to be true, too unreal to be happening right now. But it was, it was happening and she realized she needed to say or do something before she ruined her chance.

Applejack drew a deep breath. “But if you need more time that’s ok-“

“AJ.” Rainbow cut her off. She leaned forward, hands resting on her lap, until she could feel Applejack’s breath on her skin. “Are you gonna kiss me or what?”

Applejack’s eyes widened but she didn’t waste time grabbing Rainbow by her shirt, fingers fisting into fabric, pulling her in until their lips met. Rainbow gasped at the harshness of her pull. Though, the kiss was nothing like that at all. It was soft, maybe even hesitant, and surprisingly sweet. The summer heat mixed with the warmth of their lips against each other made the blazing feeling in her heart set off like fucking fireworks. They bloomed under her ribs, sharp and overwhelming.

She didn’t want this to be just like fireworks though. She didn't want them to be gone in a quick flash, a fleeting moment of excitement, just ash after an explosion. She needed this to be more.

Rainbow placed her hand on Applejack’s waist and Applejack cupped her cheek, pulling her even closer, deeper. Rainbow couldn’t fight the smile forming on her lips. She was burning up, dizzy and feverish, like that warm feeling in her stomach spread like embers through her body. But it felt good, agonizingly so– like nostalgia, the feeling that made your chest ache in that familiar way. Years of friendship flashed by, the morning bike rides, the late night study sessions, the inside jokes, the easy banter. It all felt like it disappeared the moment they crossed the line, like it got lost somewhere between their lips and Rainbow missed it already. Yet at the same time this– the kiss, the pent-up feelings finally breaking loose– made something new blossom, something warm underneath the cold sweat of her fears.

The kiss turned into uneven breaths and tense fingertips digging into skin quickly. It just got so messy and real all of a sudden and Rainbow just couldn't push her worries away.

She pulled back slowly, out of breath, her hand slid to Applejack’s arm. She looked at her with a certain anxious expectation to come across… she didn’t know what exactly. Regret? Disgust? Or that look Applejack gave her after successfully getting her back? Like this had just been some kind of game to her.

But Rainbow came across a different sight. Applejack's lips were slightly parted, her eyes half-lidded with some sort of contentment gleaming underneath, enough to reignite that simmering hope in Rainbow’s chest, enough to make her ask.

“Tell me…” she spoke slightly out of breath, “tell me, that wasn’t the last time.” The way she looked at Applejack felt almost like a plea, her eyes wandered over her face, searching the sudden unfamiliarity of the green ones in front of her.

Applejack kept her eyes on Rainbow, eyebrows slightly drawn before a smile cracked onto her lips. Her hand trailed up Rainbow’s arm and onto her cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Dash,” She laughed softly, “you think I'm just gonna walk away now?”

Rainbow looked up at her with big, hopeful eyes. Applejack shook her head in disbelief with a fond smile on her lips. And this time, instead of pulling Rainbow in, she leaned in herself, pressing her lips onto Rainbow’s like she was sealing her answer.