Work Text:
Zayne had known about your previous self-harm and had prepared measures to try to prevent it. Knives in higher shelves. Clipping your nails whenever they got too long. And always watching your mood. He would notice if you went quiet for too many days. Or if you had stopped eating. But nothing could have prepared him for this. It had been sudden. The day felt normal. Your text messages had been normal. No indicators of what would happen.
It had hit you suddenly. After too many mistakes at work and too many miscommunications, you came home from work exhausted and self-hatred brewing. You tried to take a shower to get rid of the thoughts. To quench them. But it didn't help.
It was like your body was on autopilot. You searched for a razor blade. You knew there had to be some somewhere.
Ah.
You found one.
At the bottom of your drawer.
You grabbed it and held it up, the sharp edge glinting in the light.
You laid slumped against the wall, legs stinging. You didn't bother to move. You were in a state of numbness, but the thoughts had finally died down. You didn't hear Zayne's message ding, saying that he was home, nor did you notice him calling out to you. You only noticed his presence when he wrapped you in his arms, gently taking the blade from your hand.
He soothingly rubbed your back, murmuring soft words into your ears as you finally focused on the world around you.
"Zayne...?" You whispered.
"I'm here, my love," he murmured against your hair.
You felt tears run down your face as you hugged him. You buried your face into his shoulder, sobs starting to rock your body. He gently picked you up, being careful not to put pressure on any cuts, and walked into your shared bedroom. He set you down on the bench at the end of the bed and gently wiped your tears.
"Does it hurt?"
You nodded shakily. The cuts hurt, but your heart hurt worse. You must've disappointed Zayne so much. He must've thought you were finally getting better. That you would finally stop. Yow swore you would get better-
"It's alright."
You hadn't realized that you began sobbing again as you froze, looking at him through tear filled eyes.
"It's ok if you don't get better. Just don't shut me out," he murmured, his thumb caressing your knee.
"I'm going to get the first aid kit, ok?"
You nodded, sniffling slightly.
He stood up and walked back to the restroom, grabbing the first aid kit from the bottom of the sink. He kneeled down in front of you and opened it. Wound cleaner. Anti-infection cream. Gauze. He grabbed the wound cleaner and started cleaning the cuts.
It stung.
You sniffled as he began cleaning the wounds, a few small tears leaking out. He gently caressed your hand, trying his best to distract you from the pain. He applied the antibacterial cream and carefully placed the gauze on your skin and secured it with gauze tape. He pressed a light kiss to it for extra measure.
"All done," he murmured, wiping your tears away. He smiled up at you softly. "Better?"
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your face. Quiet peace finally surrounding the both of you.
"Thank you, Zaynie," you murmured, intertwining your hand with his.
"Anything for you, my love," he murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead.