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The Winner Takes It All (Maybe I Don't Have To Win Anymore) (Maybe I Already Did) by rozanovimpersonator81
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
31 Mar 2026
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Summary
He knows he can never be what Shane needs. No matter how much he may love him. Shane is boring. He wants a family. A cottage. Summers of relaxation and laughter. Ilya knows that’s not possible. He spends the summer lying in sweat staring at popcorn ceilings, hating himself until he rises. Torturing himself with athletics until he feels satisfied with the pain endured. Like he has paid the toll for existing that day.
He presses his forehead against the glass again and peers down the 28 floors to the bush-lined concrete sidewalk below.
“I wonder if I would be recognizable after the fall?”
He hopes not.
Slowly he stands and drags a chair to the edge. Drunk as he is, he climbs upon it. Leans over and screams,
“Take me. FUCK JUST TAKE ME ALREADY! God, you are coward! You cannot even put me out of this misery. I must do it myself, da? Fuck you.” He spouts and climbs down again
or;
Ilya struggles with his depression and suicidal thoughts and considers leaving hockey, or this world