Chapter Text
The day had been absurdly peaceful. Akane had difficulty believing her luck, but suspected Nabiki had called in some favors or presented the wrecking crew with legal threats and documents. Nabiki knew people in high places.
White string lights had been hung in and outside of the dojo. The graduation party for Akane and Ranma had gone on throughout the day without a single glitch or threat of death. Old friends, neighbors, and every friend that had unleashed property damage in their neighborhood was present and accounted for. There was a general air of content and coziness that hung in the atmosphere during the day and seemed to expand as dusk began to settle in. The crowd was beginning to thin.
“Akane, we're going to head out! It was a great party, but I’m meeting my boyfriend for a celebratory dinner!” Sayuri squeezed her hands and smiled.
“I’m so glad you came,” Akane smiled. “I’m going to miss seeing you and Yuka everyday!” Yuka had left much earlier to celebrate with her own family.
“Isn’t it weird? We graduated high school. We’re adults now.”
Akane sighed, “I don’t feel like a grown up.”
“No kidding,” Sayuri laughed. “Let’s go shopping next week. I’ll need new clothes for university.”
“Sounds like a plan!”
Akane gave Sayuri a fierce hug goodbye, and began to move around the party. Her father was talking to a neighbor and looked very teary, probably discussing how his last daughter was grown and leaving the nest. Shampoo was sitting at a table, head in her hand, looking around the party for Ranma most likely. Mousse was seated beside her, speaking rapidly, hoping for her attention. Ukyo was speaking to Nodoka with a soft expression on her face, and Akane assumed she was trying to get back in Nodoka’s good graces after the damage incurred on the Saotome home. Ryoga was talking to Akari, blushing and holding her purse. Genma sat at a table with Happosai, both drunk and reminiscing about the old times. The one person missing was Ranma. With the crowd, it would be easy to disappear.
After the graduation and photos the family forced them to take, she had not crossed paths with Ranma at the party. The family had forced them together for multiple photos. She remembered how flushed her face had felt as they stood side by side and he had put an arm around her shoulder. She felt less embarrassed to note that he looked no less red than she felt.
Once she had shucked off the graduation gown, she was excited for Ranma to see the dress she wore for the day. It was a delicate white lace sundress with straps that tied at her shoulders, but it had been her mother’s graduation dress. Her father had lent it to each of the Tendo girls on their graduation day. She did not ask his opinion on the dress, but smiled to herself as she watched the redness begin to grow in his cheeks for the second time in less than an hour.
“Akane!” Ryoga and Akari waved her over.
“Congratulations, Akane!” Ryoga gushed. “Graduating high school is an accomplishment, especially when you had to drag Ranma to the finish line!”
Akari shot him a look, “What Ryoga means is that helping a friend achieve a goal is very commendable.”
Akane sighed, “Ranma is smart. He just needs to apply himself.”
Which takes a level of discipline that he entirely lacks unless it was martial arts related she did not add.
“Speaking of, have you seen Ranma?”
“Not for a while. If you do, tell him I’m ready for one more fight before he leaves for his training trip.” Ryoga added.
“Will do,” Akane agreed.
She scanned the party one additional time. He was not in or outside of the dojo and she could not wait much longer. She was about to burst. Akane had been vibrating with it all day. The need to tell him. The need to be honest. The need for something……anything to change. If she was going to say it, it had to be soon.
It had not been that long ago when she had asked him….
“You love me don’t you?”
“I didn’t say that.”
had denied it, not mincing his words. She loved him and he did not love her. It had crushed her. After that, it had taken time to feel comfortable with him again. To not let his presence or her feelings break her. She had not spoken of it again, not even hinted at it. Bringing up Jusenkyo or the delusions she experienced while stuck as a dehydrated doll was impossible. Too much had happened for her brain to fully process and understand. She had died. Then, just as inexplicably, she had come back. She had sworn she had heard the words, but how could she trust her memory when by all illogical explanations she had been dead.
But….
In the time since, she could swear that he cared. He still had the moments of hot jealously whenever any boy would pay her attention. The insults had decreased and at times he could be so sweet when it was just the two of them. He opened doors for her, brushed his fingertips against hers, and the way he looked at her sometimes, with such a dopey expression all over his features…..it took her breath away.
His actions were just enough. Just enough to tip the scales. To make her feel brave. To hold back the fear of being rejected. To ignore the real possibility that he would not or could not return her feelings.
Akane knew a rejection would devastate her. Who knew how long it would for her to pick up the pieces of her heart and tape it back together? But what was college was for if not new beginnings?
But if he could return her feelings……this thought was enough. It was worth the risk to be something to him rather than nothing.
She had to find him soon before she lost all nerve.
She had a sneaking suspicion where he would be. Akane snuck into the house, up the stairs, to her room, and through the window. And there he was……
He sat a few meters from her bedroom window. He was looking up at the sky with a blank expression on his face.
She approached him quietly. Akane sat next to him in silence for a while. A feeling of peace, not often associated with her moments with Ranma, settled upon her. She smiled. Sometimes, just to be next to him made her feel a subtle warmth.
“You left the party. Everything okay?”
He wrapped his arms around his legs, “Yeah. The party was nice.”
“It’s just a lot of people, huh?”
“Yeah.” Even though he had lived in the city, attended high school, enjoyed all the amenities that a life lived in one place offered, he had never gotten used to social gatherings.
“It was really nice for your Mom and Kasumi to plan it,” Akane offered. “It’s been a good day. Pretty quiet considering everyone in attendance.” Akane let out a dry laugh.
“No kidding,” Ranma let out a mirthless laugh of his own.
“Did Shampoo or Ukyo pester you about your plans?”
He rested his head on hands, “Of course they did.” He looked at her and saw a look of concern on her face. ”Don’t worry. I didn’t tell them a thing.”
With their graduation, her father and Ranma’s parents began to make plans. Ranma had been itching to go on a long training trip and return to China. Akane was starting her university classes this summer and took a part time job at the campus bookshop. She started next week and would be moving into a small studio apartment close to campus. It seemed the perfect time for Ranma to go on a long trip when Akane would be busy being a university student. Akane and Ranma heavily suspected that the push for a second wedding might begin upon Ranma’s return.
“It’s not a big deal if you did,” she replied in her best impression of nonchalance. “They’re just going to follow you if they catch wind of your plans.”
He sighed, “I know.”
Akane felt nauseous. Maybe he wants them to follow him. He would be free of her. Ranma could indulge in whatever activities he wanted while away. He could choose Ukyo or Shampoo. Maybe he would meet a new girl on the road. The sadness and finality of the idea pressed into her heart, sharp and cutting.
“Look, Ranma……” she began.
“Akane..” he said simultaneously.
They both paused, waiting. “You go first,” he offered.
It had to be now. “I like you, Ranma,” she blurted. He had said her name with such a somber tone. Had he been about to break the engagement? “I like you,” she repeated.
“I’ve got to be honest. I’ve liked you for a long time.” She followed the script she had practiced countless times in front of her mirror. “I know you’re leaving for your training trip and this may not be the best time to tell you, but you deserve to know. To leave and know my feelings.”
Ranma's eyes widened and he stared at her in absolute silence.
“I don’t want you to say anything back. I didn’t expect you to. You should think about it and take your time. You have a lot of people that want to be with you, Ranma. I know I’m just one of them. When or if you decide you want to be with someone, I want you to know that I don’t mind the engagement.”
“Akane…..” he breathed softly. His expression was stunned, flustered.
“No. Please don’t say anything.” her voice firm. “Think about it. I’m going back to the party. Good night, Ranma.”
Before leaving she smiled at him and placed her hand on his shoulder. He hesitated, but then stacked his hand over top of hers. Akane smiled and squeezed his shoulder lightly, before slipping her hand away. She stood to go back through the window.
“Hey, Akane,” his voice squeaked, several decibels higher than his usual tone.
She turned, “Yeah?”
“You looked really nice today.”
She smiled, that smile that always sucked the breath from his chest.
“Thank you.” She turned and left through the window.
Ranma looked back to the sky. He smiled, feeling warmth spread in his stomach and chest. His limbs felt light with the weight of that heavy question having been removed.
Maybe change was not so bad after all.
Then, another thought….the unspoken love battle they had been participating in since the first day they met. The verbal sparring, the flirting, the frustration, the kind words, the unkind words, the occasional touch, the way he protected her, the way she tried to take care of him in her clumsy way, the anger, the meaningful looks, the bickering, the comfort he found in their day to day interactions, the friendship, the taunting way they tried to get each other to confess their feelings, and the tension….my god, the tension.
It was over.
She had confessed first.
****
Akane yawned at breakfast. The party had pushed her bedtime back to the early hours of the morning. It was a typical breakfast, but Akane was nervous. Surely, Ranma would not act any differently after their talk last night. He bounded down the steps in his usual fashion and a few moments later took his normal seat at the table.
He picked up his bowl, poised to shovel his food into his mouth, but paused and smiled. He turned to Akane, “No surprise that you want to be next to me.”
She frowned, “I always sit next to you.”
The smug grin continued to cover his face, “Well, I guess we know why.”
Akane rolled her eyes, “Eat your food, dummy.”
And later in the day……
Akane slid open the dojo door. She was ready for some peace, still feeling a bit flustered by her interaction with Ranma at breakfast.
In the corner of the dojo, Ranma was focused, striking at one of the training dummies. His eyes flicked to her as she softly entered the space.
Again the self-satisfied smile crossed his face, “Did you come to watch me train?”
“No,” came her apathetic response.
“Do you want me to flex for you?” Ranma flexed his bicep in Akane’s direction.
She sighed deeply and placed her fingers on her head, “I’m good, Ranma. I’m here to train.”
“You sure? I’ve been trainin’ pretty hard lately.”
“You know what? I’ll take the weights and train outside.” Akane felt her irritation grow as she grabbed the heaviest weights and was ready to work out her frustration.
And so the next several days passed with Ranma taunting her mercilessly.
When he was heading out to stop at Ukyo’s restaurant, “Hey, Akane I’m going to see Ukyo. Don’t get jealous while I’m gone!”
Her eyebrow twitched furiously, “Have fun.”
“I get it. It’s gotta be hard to watch me spend time with other girls. You know, because of how you feel.” He waited by the door for her response.
“GOODBYE, RANMA!”
Nabiki turned the corner. She had just arrived home in time for the graduation and for her summer break from university. “Is it my imagination or is he more obnoxious than usual?”
“It’s not your imagination,” Akane ground out between clenched teeth.
“You know for a couple thousand yen I can make him disappear.” Akane whipped her head around to stare at his sister.
“What? I know some people,” Nabiki shrugged.
“Nabiki!”
“Kidding.” She held up her hands, placatingly. “Just kidding. Mostly.”
When she cooked the miso soup as the side for dinner, “It’s cute that you try so hard to impress me with your cooking when you’re hopeless in the kitchen.”
Through gritted teeth she responded, “Try it before you make assumptions, idiot.”
To her own credit, the soup had been good. Kasumi had helped her slow down and follow all steps of the recipe in sequence. She knew in her gut the soup was good and felt a sense of righteousness when she silenced his taunting with food that tasted good.
Two days later, when Shampoo accosted Ranma as they walked home from the market. Shampoo squeezed her arms around Ranma’s neck.
“Get off, Shampoo!” He struggled to free himself from her grip. Akane shrugged and continued walking.
“Hey wait! Akane!!!”
She made it half way home before he caught up with her. “You got out of her grips faster than usual. I’m impressed.”
His smirk returned, “I know how hard it is for you to see another woman hanging on me. You know…because of how you feel.”
“I guess you’re just irresistible,” she deadpanned and rolled her eyes.
The walk home continued with Ranma pestering her. She felt the usual itch to send him off the ground with her fist. Her hands were shaking and she bit her lips. Why did he have to be so insufferable? She could feel the pit in her throat and the pressure behind her eyelids. She refused to cry. Why did he have to throw her feeling for him in her face? She walked home as quickly as possible, refusing to cry or look in his eyes.
A few days later, she opened her door of her room to get more boxes to pack up her belongings, Ranma peaked his head out of his room.
“Still packing?”
“Yeah. I knew I had a lot of stuff, but it’s kind of ridiculous.”
Ranma leaned against a door frame, “If you need a break, you can come hang out with me.”
“I’d love to Ranma, but I just have so much to do.”
“C’mon, Akane. You know you want to.” There was a taunting lilt to his tone and he placed one arm on the door frame, posturing in the stupidest way possible.
“Sounds like fun, but I’ve got to get this done.” She ignored his attempts to poke at her. Why did he have to be like this? She was so sick of him making her feelings a joke.
“Oh,” he responded looking sad. “I just thought it would be fun. You know with me leaving in a few days.”
Akane paused. Why did he look like that? If she spent time with him, he would only continue to throw her feelings in her face. She could not stomach it anymore.
“I really can’t.” She moved past him in the hallway and went to get the boxes, leaving Ranma in her wake.
*********
Akane balanced a stack of books in her left arm and with her right arm slid a book into its proper spot on the bookshelf. She moved further down the aisle of books and repeated her action. It was her second day at the bookstore. So far, she loved it. It felt exciting. She was meeting other students and was surrounded by stacks of books. Even the mundane task of sorting and organizing books felt like a new beginning.
She continued down the aisle, placing one book at a time into its assigned space until she ran square into something hard. She was so startled, she lost her balance and she and the remaining ten books toppled to the floor.
She looked up to a boy who was grinning at her, “My apologies. I was looking for a textbook I needed and clearly wasn’t paying attention. I’m so sorry.” He continued to grin at her and held out his hand to help her up.
She took the hand begrudgingly, “You could look where you’re going.”
“I think the same thing could be said of you,” he smirked.
She dusted off her skirt, “I was doing my job.”
“You work here?”
“Obviously,” she squatted and began to stack the fallen books back into her arms.
“Great. I was looking for the Introduction to Psychology textbook with no luck. Could you by chance help me find it?”
“I’m a little busy at the moment.” The books teetered precariously in her arms as she rose from her squat.
“Then let me help,” the boy whipped the entire stack of books from her arms. “I’m happy to hold the books while you sort them and then you can help me.”
She tried to swipe the books back. “Or you can give me those books and go ask someone else for help.”
“But I’d really like your help.”
Akane rolled her eyes. He was flirting, no doubt about it, but the tone was kind. He smiled at her warmly and kept enough space between them that he did not appear to be creep. Just a boy flirting with a girl. She gave him a stern look, sizing him up. He was a handsome. He had a short, clean cut hair and a friendly face. He wore a simple button up shirt with a pair of jeans. He had an ease about him, like meeting new people was the simplest thing in the world.
“Fine,” she huffed.
He strolled down the aisle with her with utter patience as she placed one book after another onto the shelf, “I’m Hinata. What’s your name?”
“Akane.” She offered no more information.
“I just moved from Osaka. I don’t really know anyone yet. How about you?”
She squinted her eyes to look at the books, “No. I’m from Tokyo.”
“Oh! So you know the city pretty well?”
She stacked the last book in his arms and swiftly walked over two aisles. She scanned along the row of books, running her hands along all the bindings. Her hand stopped suddenly.
“Got it.” She turned to him and placed the book into his hands, “Intro to Psychology.”
“Thanks.”
“Do you need anything else?”
“No,” he responded. Akane spun away from him. “Hey!” He raised his voice quickly.
She turned her head, “What?”
“When are you done with work?”
She frowned, “Huh?”
He smiled, “I’m new to town and I’m trying really hard to meet new friends. There is a tea shop on campus and I was wondering if you’d like to meet me there.”
“Are you asking me on a date?”
“Nah. A date requires more planning.” He waved his hand in the air, dismissing the idea. “This is just you doing a favor for a guy that’s new to town and hoping to get to know some new people.”
Akane sighed. This guy had just asked to spend time with her with complete ease. He appeared to be the opposite of all the guys she knew in high school. He was asking and not trying to force her into a date. He did not stumble over his words or insult her. He did not dissolve when she looked at him. Could dating really be this simple?
“Why are you asking me?
His smile quirked up slightly, “Well, you’re just being so friendly. How could I resist?”
Without meaning to, she smiled a bit at his sarcasm.
Could she do it? Could she go on a date with a boy that was not Ranma? Would it even matter to him if he knew?
Probably not.
Since she had confessed her feelings, he had not acknowledged her words. He had only mocked her. Throwing her feelings in her face in that cocky way of his. Making it seem like it was inevitable that she would love him just like all the other girls. Making himself irresistible as if he was stringing her along with all the other girls in his collection of fiancées.
Without words, he had revealed exactly how he felt about her. So what did it matter if she spent time with a new boy? Was this not her plan if he rejected her, to start anew? To see if she could learn how to dismantle this great love, learn to stitch herself back together without it, and then rebuild bit by bit just to see if she was capable of loving someone new. The thought of it was exhausting.
She felt the familiar fear in the back of her throat. The fear of not having Ranma in her life at all. Her life had become so intertwined with him. If their fathers had their way, they would become even more entwined. How would she even begin to unravel him from her heart and thoughts? The fear felt so big, the loss felt beyond her ability to comprehend, but the answer was so simple…..
One step at a time.
She was strong. She had survived fighting a stupid number of boys daily to protect herself. She had survived Kuno. She had survived Shampoo’s physical attacks, poisons, and threats of death. She survived bombs in her own dojo on the day her wedding failed. She lived through kidnappings and the lecherous attacks of Happosai. She managed to come back from magic that had turned her into a doll. She had not crumbled when Ranma had been cruel, called her names, insulted her appearance, and made her to feel like she was not…….
Enough.
She was not stupid. She refused to listen to the thoughts of inadequacy. She was Akane Tendo. She had died, but then she lived. One boy was not going to destroy her even if the boy was Ranma Saotome.
She could do this. She just needed to take the first step.
“I’m off in an hour. I can meet you then.”
Then the boy gave a happy and open smile, “I’ll head there now and get a head start on my Psychology reading. Meet me there when you can!”
Without intending to, she gave him a genuine smile and he looked mildly dazed, “I’ll see you in one hour at the tea shop.”
One step at time….