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That lazy night was cool and quiet, and you were sleeping, deeply, curled beneath the blankets. At your side, as on so many other nights, your boyfriend, Leon S. Kennedy himself, sleeping as well.
In the middle of this particular night, something wakes you up slightly of your peaceful slumber, your body barely perceiving it at first. But it kept happening. A movement, a shake, mumbling and muffled noises coming from beside you.
Your eyes snapped open, your half numb head still foggy, disoriented, unsure of what’s really happening, of where the noise was come from. You sat vaguely, popping yourself with your elbow, squinting into the darkness, looking at the bread shape next to you, that give random shakes and violent twitches, as electrocuted by a ghost.
- The… fuck…?- You mutter under your breath, trying to understand what’s happening, stretching your arm, reaching blindly for the lamp on your nightstand, turning it on, the light making your eyes blind for a moment, forcing you to shield them with the back of your hand.
When your vision cleared a little, you focus your gaze on Kennedy, seeing him frowning his still closed eyes, his face tense, grabbing the sheets, breathing fast, sweat clung to his skin.
- No…- Leon mumble, trapped in in dreams- Go… away… Hugnn… Go…- He shook his head weakly, as if something is trying to grab his eyes- Don’t… touch me… I don’t… Nggg…
It falls now on your mind; he is having a nightmare. He had warned you, he had told you that sometimes his past visits him on his sleep, but is the first time you were seeing it with your own eyes. You move even closer, placing a hand on his chest, rubbing it softly to try to wake him up. You can feel his fast heartbeat behind his muscles, the shirt he uses to sleep, slightly wet by his sweat.
- Leon…- You called him, softly at first, careful to not startle him more- Ey… Love… Wake up…
Your soft shake seemed to make his nightmare worse for a moment, until you shake him enough for him to pull him from the world of dreams, Leon sitting like a spring, instinctively pulling the gun he always have under the bed, in a speed bordering a lightning, pointing around with it, panic on his eyes, confused, lost, searching for the demons that had been destroying his mind this night.
- Hey, hey, Leon, is okay!- You sat next to him, holding his big arm, feeling his muscles tensed like a bowstring, afraid that he may just shoot at something- Honey, is okay! Was a nightmare! You are safe!- You brushed his temple with the back of your fingers, seeing how he turns his face to you, at your soft reassuring smile and peaceful eyes- Is okay…- You whisper at him- See? We are okay… Was just a bad dream… Breathe…
- I…- He looked around again, scanning the room, chasing invisible evils, the fog of the nightmare slowly leaving his memory, his eyes confirming that he is on the bed, safe, with you- Is… God… I’m sorry, I…- He is shivering, his arms trembling, his breathe raggedy.
- Don’t sorry, hon…- You rub amply his back in slow, steady strokes- Is okay…- You saw that he still keeps his heavy gun on his hand, his fingers grabbing it until his knuckles had gone pale- Can you put the gun away…? Please…?
- I…- He looks at his hand and blinked, realizing just now that he had yield his weapon by pure instinct- Yeah… yeah, sorry…- He let the gun on the nightstand next to him, before he rubbed his face with his shaky hands, almost keeping his face hidden, even when you saw the glimpse of tears on his sad blue eyes.
- Do you want to talk about it…?- You asked at him with caring voice, your fingers rubbing the tense muscles of his neck.
- No…- He deny, still covering his face, his wet hair shaking with the movement- I want them… gone…
- I know, love… I know… - You say, with a sad tone, before press a soft tender smooch on his shoulder.
Leon didn’t talk much about his nightmares. You remember only the fragments, the scarce times he talked about them, the little things he actually managed to say, since he kept the darkest parts of himself away from you, almost afraid to poison your existence with the mere mention of them. But you didn’t need the details, you do know how much they haunt him. The terrible memories, the many lives he lost, the missions he failed, the monsters he hunted, the guilt, the deep fears of become into one of these deadly abominations with no soul, these are things that destroy him from inside, more than any possible physical wound.
- Can I help you somehow?- You asked, almost desperate to make these sad eyes calm again- A tea maybe? You want me to get your meds?
- No…- He took a shaky deep breathe. He hates his pills. They make him sleep, yes, but make him feel like a zombie during the next day, and he needs to be alert, always, no matter what.
- Maybe one of your books?- You offer. He tends to read boring things until he falls asleep when his mind is too messy- Or we could just stay up for a bit… skip this night…
- Is…- He frown, looking at the clock in the bedside table, seeing that’s barely 2:08 am- Shit- He groans, rubbing his face again- Fucking two of the morning… I… I will try to sleep again…
You nodded, reaching over to turn off the light on your nightstand, laying again at his side, face up.
- Come here…- You whisper, tapping your chest, inviting him- Let me try to relax you…
Kennedy gave a short sigh, laying down close, cuddling against you, using your body as a pillow. He wrapped his big arm around your waist, snuggling his face on your chest, seeking your warmth that always calmed him so much. He rarely does that, he rarely let himself be this vulnerable, always trying to hide how broken he is inside, but tonight he is way too tired of his own past, that all what he feels is his soul searching for this, to a gently reminder of safety, comfort, a reminder of a safe present, away of his tormenting past.
He gave another sigh, this time very long, carrying the sadness and pain, his body relaxing slightly when your arms surround him. One of your hands travels tenderly up and down his arm around your waist, as the other bury on his hair, rubbing gently his scalp.
- I really hate to waking you up…- He said, lifting his sad blue eyes to you- I’ll make it up to you, promise…
- You don’t have to- You smiled at him, softly- I like to take care of you, you know it… That’s what partners do, right?- You smooched long his forehead.
- Mmhmm…- He groaned, getting comfier against you, his face near your neck, his eyes closing.
Leon is never going to say it out loud, but those small gentle smooches always healed parts of his heart he never knew were broken at first. But you didn’t really need him to tell you, you figure it out early on in the relationship, by seeing how his face relaxed each time your lips pecked his forehead, the way he gave happy grunts, the way he always tried to let his head close enough for you to do it. It was his little-not so hidden secret.
You cover both better with the blankets, your lips dropping tender kisses on his forehead, one behind another, your hands still touching him, keeping him closer, reminding him how safe he is now.
- I love you so much, baby- He whisper, giving you a gentle squeeze.
- Love you too, my big boy- You smiled.
You stayed in silence, loving him on that soft way that did so good to him, letting your heartbeat to sooth him, your warmth chasing his demons away, staying on guard for him, minute after minute, with tender patience, until his body turn pliant and still against you, following the temporary calmness of his mind. Only then is when you rested your cheek against his head and allowed yourself to sleep, ready to wake up and saving him from as many nightmares as you have to, like the guard of his nights.