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It’s a normal evening.
Ushio idly scrolls through his timeline. The fan-art today is absolutely addictive—these PatiBato artists are so skilled and Ushio’s so thrilled to be alive and in the fandom at this exact moment. Even better for Ushio, a lot of his timeline today is ReiOu fanart.
For a moment, as he gazes at the beautiful masterpieces he’s kindly been allowed to feast his eyes upon, Ushio wonders if he’ll ever fall in love. He wonders if his love life would be like the doujinshis he has read.
Then, Ushio shoves his head into a pillow as he realizes how ridiculous and utterly cringe that thought was. He hates that he had it at all, but he supposes being a teenaged, BL-reading loser just makes an individual like that, for lack of a better descriptor.
There was no way his romantic endeavors could be simplistic and cutesy like in a manga because inevitably, Ushio would draw back. The touch would become overwhelming even if Ushio’s mind insisted it was okay, it was safe, his skin and body and nerves would disagree.
Anyone would grow sick of that, Ushio thinks, because he would grow sick of his own inability, too.
Ushio sighs—he doesn’t need to be understood in that regard, anyway. He has Muneuji.
As if the universe was replying to Ushio’s thoughts, Muneuji opens the door to Ushio with his face in a pillow and his phone thrown somewhere on his bed. This worsens Ushio’s embarrassment tenfold.
“… Hello, Uu–chan. Is everything alright?” Muneuji asks as he shuts the door.
Ushio returns a muffled, “Hey, Muu-chan.”
“Ah, well, I suppose I won’t pry…” Muneuji concludes aloud. “Say, Uu-chan… Could we stargaze tonight? There’s a full moon.”
To be quite honest, Ushio would love to continue enjoying the Reito and Ouji fanart on his screen, yet he still sits upright and stretches. Then, he glances out the window. Sure enough, the moon is slowly coming into view.
“Yeah, ‘course. Change into your pajamas, first, though.”
It’s an average night.
The pair heads outside with nothing but a blanket to lay on the grass. Their pajamas were probably going to get a bit dirty, but neither cared much. Ushio takes the opportunity to lie down carelessly, but Muneuji sits upright with a determination to count every star.
The stars glisten and twinkle amidst their noir background that almost seems velvety. The slight differences in the nighttime’s hues are pleasing to see, and of course, the moon is the most beautiful.
While Ushio thinks simply towards the moon, Muneuji gazes at it with a look that says so much more than Ushio could ever articulate. That look of pure adoration Muneuji had for a mere planet was what drove Ushio out here more than anything.
… It’s probably not typical to feel so deeply towards, nor yearn so casually for, nor want so badly to caress, his childhood friend.
Ushio isn’t stupid or dense, so he knows as much, but he doesn’t dare mention it. He doesn’t enjoy change. He doesn’t enjoy the prospect of having to confront whatever feelings he or Muneuji felt because he knows it’s some weird, complex thing that doesn’t fit into a box.
Instead, he simply takes the chance to greedily stare at Muneuji’s eyes that seemed to hold a galaxy of thoughts within them. The stars reflect prettily in Muneuji’s pupils, right where they belong.
Muneuji doesn’t even glance back, doesn’t seem to notice nor care about Ushio’s stare, which makes Ushio want to stare longer, perhaps for an eternity. However, Ushio does want to appreciate the night, too—so, he glances back to the vast night sky.
But, Ushio simply has nothing to add. All he can see is that it’s pretty. He knows no facts, context, or myths of his own that could make the night more enticing.
So, Ushio simply appreciates the carefree and tranquil moment and waits for Muneuji to broach a topic of interest.
“Sometimes I feel as if the stars are hiding secrets from us,” Muneuji suddenly says, as if in response to Ushio’s thoughts.
Ushio makes a small hum. “They probably are.”
“I believe one of their secrets is that they are trying to speak to us.” Muneuji now glances to Ushio. “There are times I believe the stars align just right, telling us to act.”
“Yeah?”
“Absolutely. The universe is too vast for it to not have some ties in fate. Such as tonight, I feel it is destiny for us to be outside under the night’s gaze.”
“Huh… Why, though?”
Muneuji seems to hesitate for only a moment which was rare for someone so headstrong. Ushio waits and looks back to Muneuji; he hopes that his gaze can have the same effect that clutching Muneuji’s hand would.
The sentiment seems to be there as Muneuji softens.
“Because the moon is beautiful tonight, isn’t it, Uu-chan?” Muneuji whispers like it’s a secret for just the two of them.
Ushio stops short and frantically turns to Muneuji as if to confirm what he had heard. Immediately, his heartbeat seems painfully loud against the silent night.
His first thought otherwise is that he feels like he’s in a fan-fiction, before he realizes that the thought is, yet again, immensely corny and inappropriate for the mood. This mood that Ushio isn’t even sure how to describe.
His next thought is that this was it—Ushio had to confront his and Muneuji’s closeness. Yet, the way Muneuji presents his confession is so subtle and vague that Ushio isn’t stressed like he thought he’d be.
The night feels precious all of a sudden as Ushio’s cheeks warm. Ushio turns towards Muneuji, still laying on his side, and buries his face in his arms. Saying the words he wanted to return was harder than he realized.
“I… Y-Yeah, it is…” Ushio finally whispers back, his words slightly slurred. “I could die happy after seeing it… o-or whatever.”
Muneuji seems to let out a held breath before he laughs. Before Ushio realizes it, he’s laughing too. It’s ridiculous to laugh carelessly as if nothing changed after all, but they were.
Maybe rather than labelling it as a ‘change’ occurring, they had simply made another promise, another oath to one another.
Maybe Ushio and Muneuji were also just stupid teenagers navigating life. So, maybe there’s no need for Ushio to worry about how his love life will play out or whether or not he’s capable of physical affection by tomorrow because the stars will still be there.
Maybe there’s just this moment, and Ushio wants to cherish the moment while it’s still in his grasp. Perhaps that was the stars’ secret advice that they were whispering.
As the pair’s laughter dies down, Ushio gazes back to the stars and the moon. It really feels like a scene straight from a manga, or like Ushio’s reality was finally as lighthearted as the dumb doujins he read.
“Hey, Muu-chan.”
Muneuji looks to Ushio.
“I’ll bake you something tomorrow. You can decide what you want.”
“Ooh, what a treat.” Muneuji looks excited even at such a small prospect. “Perhaps, I’ll have something simple… such as chocolate chip cookies.”
“You never tire of those, do you?” Ushio teases, but it makes him happy that things were mundane like that.
“I could never. Uu-chan’s baking is simply insurmountable.”
“I’m crying… Well, if you’re saying it, it’s gotta be true.”
Eventually the pair gets back to stargazing like their conversation was casual. Muneuji points at a star.
Ushio feels like he’s lying a bit closer even though he doesn’t consciously remember moving closer. However, Muneuji is still far and out of reach for Ushio for now, just like the stars, and like the stars, Muneuji will still be there tomorrow. And Ushio wants to trust in that.
Before he realizes it, Muneuji’s ramblings about the friendly stars in the sky lull Ushio to sleep.
It’s a special night, and Ushio’s never been so appreciative of the stars.
“Uu-chan? … Ah. Well… I must carry you back to your bed, then…”