Chapter Text
it was midnight.
luke was sitting on the bathroom floor, staring at his bloody wrist. only a little bit, he didnt want to go to far. although hes already missing the feeling. before he can dwell any longer, he gets up and washes away the blood, leaving it fresh and still leaking a bit. luke leaves the bathroom and exits purgatory hall. he isnt supposed to be out unsupervised, especially not this late. but, theres one person he feels compelled to tell. the one person hes seen with similar scars.
he made it to the house of lamentation in no time, hes been there a bunch so he has the route memorized. although, he has no idea which is the right room. he glides up to the high windows and peeks into them, seeing various rooms before landing on the white haired demon whose, for some reason, still awake. he was sitting on his bed, playing on his d.d.d. luke tapped on the window and caught the moment of surprise and shock.
mammon gets up and opens the window. "hi." luke said simply, crawling in without asking because his wings were tired.
"uh, hey? the hell are ya doin here, kid?" mammon looked at him skeptically. he was wearing a plain white tee shirt and baggy, plaid pajama pants. the short sleeves allowed luke to see the array of scaring on both arms, some old, some new.
"uhm..." he stood awkwardly for a moment. "i didnt know who else to go to...?"
"an' what does 'at mean?"
lukes mind was running in circles, it felt like a circus on wheels going downhill. was he really about to do this?
he rolled up his sleeve, showing mammon the five long, thin cuts on his pale skin. mammon looked even more shocked than earlier, but like... scared or worried shock.
luke used the second of time that mammon was using to process as an opportunity to take in the scent hitting his nose. it was strong and hes no doubt smelt it here before, the weed. hadnt expected it from mammon though.
mammon sat on his bed and patted the spot next to him.
luke exhaled lightly and sat down. mammon was going through his drawers before pulling out bandages and cleaning stuff. it stung a little, but luke, for some reason, didnt mind.
"thank you." lukes voice came out quiet as mammon finished the aid.
"no problem. now, if you wanna share, can i know why?"
like stayed silent. he trusted mammon, more than anyone could trust a greedy, money-hungry demon. but, just this once, luke looked past it and leaned one mammons arm unconsciously.
"i dunno. i guess i just... wanted to feel for a bit."
"you wanted to feel? the pain?"
"yeah. i havent been feeling much. other than numbness and sadness i guess. maybe pity."
"pity for who?"
"simeon. i think. he kept trying to make me feel happy. so i pretended."
"i see."
they sat in silence for awhile. luke found it awkward, like he needed to say something. he looked up at mammons distressed face, "why do you?"
the suprised etched itself onto mammons face again, "uhm..."
"you dont have to answer."
"nah, nah. just like, an outlet. discipline."
"discipline?"
"yeah, like if i can feel the greed in my veins, i cut so itll go away."
"oh. why do you smoke?"
"well, it was supposed to be a one time thing but theyre crazy addictive."
"right."
luke found the silence comfortable now as he wondered what smoking was like. its okay to be curious, its not like hes going to try it out himself!
"can i stay here tonight? ill message simeon and tell him not to worry..."
mammons eyes widened, though they softened as he nodded with a smile.
luke tucked himself under mammons blanket as said man stood by the window to not plauge the room in the smell of cannabis.
luke watched in fascination as mammon took a drag.
"can i tr-" "no."
"okay."