Chapter Text
I came back to my apartment just a few blocks away from Russia Sushi, fumbling for the keys in my pocket. However, I tripped over someone in the process.
"Gah! What the hell--" I started, finding a certain flea in front of my door, but he was... Sleeping. Funny, I'd never seen him even close his eyes at night before.
"God dammit, I don't want to be the one carrying you," I grumbled, weighing my options. I figured he was probably drunk.
"Shizu-chan? Is that you?" Izaya slowly sat up, rubbing at his eyes.
"Yeah, it's me. What the hell are you doing on the floor, Izaya?"
Izaya laughed. "Oh, that? Well, Shinra and Celty just got engaged!"
"So?"
"So..." It took me a minute, but then it clicked.
"Shit, man!"
"I know!"
"So, what do you want me to do about it!?"
"For starters, I need a place to sleep--"
"Oh, no way in hell are you sleeping at my apartment!"
"Fine, fine, I'll just go back in the cold, wasting away. Oh, what will I do when I need to find shelter? Oh, the blizzard outside just gets stronger with each billow of wind!"
"There's no blizzard--"
"It's colder than the tundras of Siberia, Shizu-chan!"
"Not my problem."
"But I'm your friend--"
"We've tried to kill each other since middle school, fleabag."
"Pleeeease,” Izaya begged, more awake now. I considered it for a moment, and I sighed heavily.
“So you really don’t have anywhere else to go?” Izaya shook his head, and I almost felt bad for him. I knew that I needed to snap out of it--taking pity on a parasite--but I just couldn’t.
“Tch, fine. But only if you promise not to take my bed,” I rolled my eyes, finding my keys and opening the door. Izaya’s eyes widened, and I thought he was going to hug me for a moment.
“Thank you so much, Shizu-chan!” His words sounded genuine, but I’m sure it was just the late night getting to me.
“Whatever,” I replied. “Just make sure to take off your shoes before you step inside.” He did so, and I sighed once more, rubbing at the back of my neck.
“Shizu-chan?”
“Drop the ‘chan,’” I murmured with a hint of anger in my voice. I couldn’t find it in myself to get into a heated argument in the dead of night.
“Fine; Shizuo?”
“What is it?”
“What were you doing out this late?” Izaya smirked. “You weren’t looking for a fight, were you? My goodness, Shizu-chan, you just can’t let your anger rest for a moment--”
“It’s not like that,” I insisted, annoyed that he wouldn’t just leave me be. “I just, I couldn’t sleep, so I got myself a snack. I was going to walk around Ikebukuro for a little while, but then I forgot my phone. I came back, and here we are now,” I nodded towards him, indicating how much he was imposing on my peaceful night.
“Is that really why you’re out so late all the time?”
“Besides my job as a bartender… Yeah, that sums it up.”
“Shizu-chan, where is the fun in that? Sleepless nights and a bar where you don’t even try to look like you have a friendly disposition,” He trailed off with the last part, but I did hear him.
“Why should I try to be friendly? These are just kids who want to forget and men and women who come to find another person to spend the night with. It’s not like they’ll remember my name the next morning.”
“You’re Shizuo Heiwajima, don’t give me any of that,” Izaya argued. “Everyone in Ikebukuro knows about you. Hell, I’ve seen humans tremble at the mere mention of you.”
“And why would you care if I was having any fun?” Izaya yawned.
“Never mind that. We can discuss this later, but right now, I’m quite worn out. Would you prepare a bed for me?”
“I already told you; you’re not taking my bed, flea,” I protested.
“So, find somewhere else for me to sleep.”
“The couch.”
“There’s no sheets or even a blanket? And the pillows? Completely absent, Shizu-chan.”
“I’ll find some,” I rolled my eyes, already heading for the closet in the living room. “Just… Sit there or whatever. I’ll be back in a minute. Don’t try to psychoanalyze me by digging through my mail, or else you really will be a dead man.”
“Fine,” Izaya agreed. “I am quite curious about you, but I won’t investigate, yet.”
“Never investigate me, you bastard,” I called from the closet, grabbing a warm blanket. I placed in on top of the couch. “Here.”
“That’s not enough, Shizu-chan.”
“What else do you need?”
“A pillow, you protozoan.” I curled my fists up once again, but I refused to blow up at nearly three am.
“Tch, fine.” I stomped to my bedroom and took a pillow from my bed. He better not complain this time, damn flea. Acting like he’s a prince, I thought to myself, walking back to the living room. “How’s this?”
Izaya looked at his bed for the night and put his hand to his chin as if he were concocting another task for me. “Hmm… I think this will suffice for one night.”
“Good. Now, go the hell to sleep.”
“Shizu-chan, I might need a bedtime story.” Izaya said, the condescending words traveling from his mouth and making me clench my teeth.
“I’m not the parent type, sorry.”
“Shizuo!” He imitated the voice of a shocked parent. “One day, you’ll have a child. Don’t you think I’m good enough practice to put to sleep?”
“Izaaayaaaa--”
“Ah, ah! Don’t start with me,” Izaya put his index finger in the air, twirling it around. “Your voice needs to be softer, and you need to make sure the story is interesting enough to keep me absolutely enraptured but boring enough to make me fall asleep.”
“What if I don’t give a damn if you fall asleep or not?”
“You have to try at least once.”
“Fine, I’ll tell you your Goddamn story,” I reluctantly agreed. How many times am I going to concede to this fleabag tonight?
“Bring your story to life, Shizu-chan!” Izaya exclaimed, crawling under the blanket and awaiting my words. I glared at him.
“You’ll never get to sleep with the amount of energy you have,” I waved him over to the dining table in the kitchen. “Come here, I’ll make us some tea. Celty gave me a box the other day, but I haven’t tried it since.”
Izaya smirked. “Didn’t peg you as the tea-drinking type.”
“What type would that be,” I asked, but I didn’t care.
“Whatever. Why would Celty give you tea?” I scratched my head, finding the box.
“She’s concerned about my sleep, or lack thereof,” I handed him the box. “Anyways, here’s the tea.” Izaya glanced at the title and bursted out laughing.
“Sleepy Time tea!?” He couldn’t stop laughing. “This literally sounds like something for a child, Shizuo.”
“I don’t care. I need a guinea pig. I’m not trying this shit by myself.”
“So, you’re implying that it will taste horrible?”
“I don’t know. Maybe,” I rubbed at my eyes. “Just give me the box back, and let me make tea for you, ungrateful little,” I didn’t bother to finish when I felt Izaya’s fingertips on the box brush against mine. Whatever; I got what I needed.
A few minutes later, I finished making the tea and handed Izaya a mug.
“What do you think?” Izaya took a tip of the still-hot beverage.
“Pretty good,” He set his mug down without a coaster or even a towel so it doesn’t cause a ring to form on my new table. Heathen. “Now, I need a story.” I sighed.
“Then you’ll go to sleep?”
“Then I’ll go to sleep.” Izaya agreed.