Work Text:
"You look worse than I did in college," Kiki jabbed, lounging back in her chair.
Naomasa sighed, as he so often did when 'graced' with Kiki's presence. He was very aware of how disheveled he looked as of late, but it felt justified. Even with Eraserhead watching out for Whisper, he still worried each minute there wasn't a ding from his phone to inform him the vigilante was still alive and well(ish).
"Thank you for pointing out the obvious."
Kiki flung a file at him, snorting when it smacked him in the face before he could catch it. He truly wondered how Eraserhead put up with teenagers all day, because he practically worked with one and she was intolerable on a good day.
Being the mature one, Naomasa set the file on his desk. Kiki predictably rolled her golden eyes, leaning forward to rest her chin on a palm. "When was the last time you slept, Tsukauchi?"
"Last night," he informed her. It wasn't a lie, he had slept for last night, but only for a few hours. He took a few naps during the day in between dodging calls from his sister.
She hummed, tapping a ring decorated hand on her desk. "And what time did you go home?"
"I don't see why that's relevant, but around three."
"In the morning?"
"We do work the overnight shift, Kiki. I don't think it's that unreasonable."
"True. He's kept us here later anyway. But I think I've left before you every day this week. Pretty impressive, 'cause I'm never gone before 2:30. You really do act like he's your kid."
Naomasa, wisely, did not respond to that. No need to give Kiki anymore reason to continue with her… whatever she was doing.
He wouldn't call her an uncaring person, but she certainly wasn't the type to fuss over somebody's sleep schedule. She was perfectly content to let people make their own bad choices without interference. So for her to express (in her own way) concern for his sleep schedule….
She must've been projecting. Clearly.
He carried on with his work, debating if he could convince Whisper to patrol during the day so he could switch to the day shift soon. That'd be nice. A better sleep cycle for socializing, too. Maybe he could even meet up with Makoto for coffee soon. It felt like he hadn't seen her in weeks.
Given, half the reason was him desperately dodging her attempts to hang out because he knew she'd lay into him for at least an hour over his general state of existence, but his point still stood.
"Nao!"
Naomasa stared at his desk for a few seconds, sending a prayer to whatever existed for some mercy, before looking up to see his sister standing in the doorway of the station, dark eyes narrowed on him.
Well, there goes all his hopes and dreams for the day. Purely his luck, it'd seem. He'd have to stick Kiki with as much paperwork as humanly possible. Maybe he'd make her do his paperwork somehow. Anything to get revenge for snitching on him to his little sister. That had to be against some kind of code somewhere, right? Then again, Kiki had always been a bit of a bastard.
"You're welcome," Kiki said cheerfully, shoving Naomasa's bag at him. "Have a good sleep, Boss!"
"Where's Sansa?" he all but pleaded. If anybody would take mercy on him now, it'd be Sansa. If only to get back at Kiki for, well, being Kiki.
"He can't save you now, Old Man. Move it, 'cause she looks pissed."
Naomasa relunctantly got up from his desk, walking across the station to the doorway in what could only be described as a walk of shame and terror. Despite being the older of the two, he had never been able to get anything past his sister. And she rarely let things go.
He recalled that she had once replaced all his coffee with decaf until he'd passed out. So he was not keen to find out how she was going to try and force him to sleep tonight. He didn't exactly have time though, considering Whisper was probably already out.
"You," she hissed, eyes narrowed. "Have been dodging my calls. All. Week."
"I've been really busy, Ma-"
She tossed her hair to the side, huffing. "Don't care. You could've taken five minutes to call your baby sister!"
Makoto despised being referred to as his baby sister, but she never did care about anything that suited her If it helped her make a point she'd probably call herself anything. "You're right, I'm sorry."
She crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow. "Good answer, Nao. Anyways, Fujikawa-"
"It's Kiki!"
"Sorry, Kiki, said you haven't slept in a year. I'm starting to think she was underseling it." Her statement was acompanied by a critical eye looking him up and down. "Is your blood more water or coffee, brother dearest?"
Naomasa sighed. "Must you be like this?"
"I must," she agreed, inspecting her nails with an air of drama. Her arrogant face fell, ebony eyes soft with concern. "Really, Nao, you need to sleep."
"I'm on the clock, Mako. I'll sleep when I go home."
Makoto shook her head. "No, you're clocking out now and I'm driving your sorry ass to my apartment where I can make sure you actually sleep. Maybe shove some melatonin down your throat too."
"That's very unnecesarry."
Kiki threw a pencil at the back of his head. "Not it isn't!"
"I wish I could fire you."
"Too bad, old man. You're stuck with me."
Naomasa scrubbed a hand over his face. "Look, that vigilante I'm dealing with is probably on patrol right now, so I really can't clock out."
His sister peered over his shoulder at Kiki. "Confirm or deny?"
"Deny, Queen. I got this."
"Please, no. You're both horrible enough on your own."
Kiki gasped. "I'm a motherfucking delight! We'll be a great duo."
"Fujikawa."
She sighed, throwing herself back in her chair. "Alright, alright. I can handle it, Tsukauchi. Go get some sleep or I'm gonna tell Whisper next. He'll probably start crying on the call."
To likely nobody's surprise, the threat of upsetting Whisper was enough for Naomasa to give in. He couldn't stand the thought of being the reason Whisper was upset and he knew Kiki wasn't kidding about her threats. The evidence being his sister right next to him.
"Let's go," he sighed, setting his trusted Fedora on his head.
Makoto clicked her tongue in what was probably disapproval. She had never liked his hat. At least Toshinori appreciated his hat.
She all but dragged him to her car and shoved him in the passenger seat, despite being a nearly half a foot shorter. She put on some English pop song he didn't know the name of. Toshinori probably did. Sometimes Naomasa wondered if that man was just an uncercover American.
"So, what's with you and not sleeping? I mean you've never had a good sleep schedule, but this is impressive even for you."
"Work," he sighed. "That vigilante."
"You're just going to have to be patient with him, Nao. Work more on catching him."
"You know, I tried that actually. He ran under a fallen fence."
Makoto chuckled. "And you tried to go after him?"
"Won't make that mistake again," he muttered. "Children shouldn't be so fast."
"They're children. They're fueled by sugar and pre-teen angst."
Never had he heard truer words.
The rest of the drive passed in relative silence until they reached the parking lot of Makoto's apartment building. It was a very nice building, obviously. He couldn't help a bit of pride at how well his sister was doing in her life. Not that he contributed much to her success.
She led the way up to her apartment, on the 6th floor, and shoved him toward her couch the moment his shoes were off.
"Away with the hat, away with the coat. It's time for your nap."
Naomasa sighed fondly, abiding her instructions out of survival. She flicked off the lights, draping a blanket over him. It was almost embarassing to be taken care of by his own little sister, but she'd always been this way. If she didn't want to do it, she wouldn't.
Rules, standards, expectations. She took no part in any of it. Being the younger sibling never stopped her from bossing Naomasa around or threatening to beat up an ex for him. The expectation for older siblings to care for their younger counterparts was one Naomasa was taught but never properly able to execute.
He'd certainly tried to do so, to look out for and teach his sister, but she never really let him. It was both endlessly frustrating and endearing of her. He wouldn't call her a caretaker, but she was a stubborn woman. If she decided Naomasa needed to sleep, he'd have to sleep.
"Night, Naonao," she sing-songed.
Naomasa sighed fondly. "Goodnight, Mako."
"And?"
"And thank you for kidnapping me from my job."
"You're welcome."
XxX
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT
9:17 PM
You: tsukauchi got dragged away by his sister
You: you get me tonight rat
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT: stinky.
You: watch it im not above beating a child
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT: ILL TELL ON YOU TO TSUKAUCHI-SAN AND SANSA-SAN
You: i dont care they can smd
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT: sigh
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT: anyway i caught a creep, currently knocked out and bleeding xoxo
You:omw
You: hit him a little more to be safe
TSUKAUCHI'S STREET RAT: :)
You: see? i told tsukauchi i have this handled.