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Atop wall Maria, Bertholdt and Reiner sit and share a cup of coffee, accompanied by Zeke and Pieck. The pair sit out of earshot of Zeke, who decided to patrol the walls(an excuse to stretch his legs). Pieck, in titan form, scouts for enemy soldiers coming from the inner walls. They remain silent, preparing for what might come, in the dark hours of the morning.
Even though Reiner and Bertholdt have been with each other for weeks, neither said a word of any personal thoughts or feelings, nothing beyond the superficial. For a while, there’s been horrible tension between them. Fierce anger, harsh disappointment, and hints of shame tainted their friendship, intensified by Reiner’s reckless decision to reveal their identities. Fed up with the silence from his closest, most beloved friend, Bertholdt decides it’s time to open up.
“Do you think what we’re doing is right?”
Reiner looks at him like he just spoke another language. He sets his cup down in front of him, wanting to be thoughtful with his response, though taken aback.
“It’s what needs to be done. I’m not sure how right killing people is, but they’ve brought enough suffering to the rest of the world.” His answer is confident but spoken with a self aware insincerity. The Marlean influence on his opinion is too painfully obvious.
Bertholdt frowns, looking down into his cup of bitter Marlean coffee, his reflection frowning back at him. He knew the answer he would get from Reiner, but hoped it would be different, a way out of this slaughter they were planning.
“Is that what you truly believe? I saw how close you became with everyone, especially Eren— is that how you feel?” He questions further, wishing to get a heart to heart with Reiner for once.
The air grows heavy between them as Reiner shoots him a nasty glare, an angry rebuttal pulling at his lips.
“You really think I want to kill those people? No, I wish there was a better way too, but we have to get this over with. If we don’t we’ll just be fed to the next warriors. Our lives are short enough as is. Happy now?” Reiner snaps back at him, frustrated with his questions. Clearly, he’s already thought about this.
They sit in silence as they finish their coffee, both of them feeling guilty for souring the mood, and bringing each other down.
“I’m sorry.” Reiner speaks up. “I don’t want to make you feel worse than you already do, you’ve got a heart of gold in there.” He places a hand on Bertholdt’s shoulder, firm and reassuring. “Keep your head down and get through it.” His eyes show an unfamiliar sincerity, different from his usual persona.
In this moment, an idea strikes Bertholdt. A risky, ridiculous idea that would ruin everything, and damn their short lives.
“What if we revolt.” He states, dead serious, traces of excitement towards the end of his words.
Reiners face drops as he watches the others light up.
“We possess two of the nine,” He waves his hand between them, as if it wasn’t clear who he was talking about. “We are a million man army on our own. We could tear it all down, eliminate the structure that keeps us under Marley’s boot!” He smiles like he never had before, a wonder Reiner has only seen in the likes of Armin.
“Are you fucking crazy?”
He blurts, terrified of the repercussions from such a thought. He goes on, attempting to shut down any continuation of this ridiculous suggestion.
“It seems you got closer to those devils than I did, you sound like that suicidal maniac-“
“Don’t you get it? Those are our people!” Bertholdt smacks Reiner's chest with the back of his hand. “If you think kissing Marley’s ass will get you anywhere you’re sorely mistaken. You’re nothing but a monster, a devil to the people of Marley— of the world! You’re no different from the Paradisians. No one would even have to die,” He stammers despite the power in his voice. “We have the leverage of our titans, including Eren, if we win his trust back!” He speaks with such stern certainty, reminiscent of Commander Erwin’s grand mannerisms.
Reiner stares into Bertholdt’s hope filled eyes. He drops his head, shaking Bertholdt before shoving him lightly, then letting go of his shoulder. He brings his arm down into his crossed legs, clasping his hands around each other like an anchor to ground himself. He bites his lip.
“Damnit, Bertholdt. Why? why do you have to make it more complicated than it needs to be?” He speaks in his low and gruff tone, little cracks revealing a weak whimper. He looks back up to Bertholdt, tears swelling in his eyes. “Shit.. I wanna do it. I’m so tired of all this death and destruction.” He gives him a desperate look, breath caught in his throat. “One more betrayal and it’ll be over, right?” His voice wavers.
His tough front crumbles entirely before Bertholdt’s very eyes. His words came from the boy within, neither soldier nor warrior.
Bertholdt’s expression dims as he processes how this might really come to fruition. His eyes soften as his smile comes back.
“Right.” He affirms.