Chapter Text
It was like Naomi and Amos had one heart between them. Because Naomi had opened hers to Holden, he suddenly had Amos' as well. Or maybe Amos’ heart was just in Naomi’s keeping, or he had no heart and just borrowed hers. Whichever it was, Holden spent the rest of the trip to Tycho wrapped up in their dual affections.
The morning after the two had invited Holden to “join them,” he had woken up with Naomi in his arms and Amos bringing them coffee. Amos had sat back and studied them for the rest of the morning; watching the way Naomi caressed Holden’s hip, how she met his every look with a wide smile. Then it was like a switch flipped and suddenly Amos was running his hand along Holden’s shoulder, laughing at his jokes and offering to massage out the crick in his neck.
Though their romantic interludes provided welcome distraction, the long flight to Tycho was still full of a low-grade stress. No one knew what awaited the survivors when they met with Fred Johnson. While Holden found he was almost addicted to the daily news feeds’ discussions of the Canterbury and Donnager disasters, Naomi had declared she couldn’t stand to sit around speculating. She and Amos spent most of their time on that flight digging around in the newly-christened Rocinante’s innards, getting to know their new ship from the inside out.
When Holden went to the lower levels he could hear the pair cooing and marveling at the sophistication of the Martian tech. Naomi would wave him over in excitement and babble at him in a technical language Holden didn’t really understand; he just watched her eyes sparkle and let her enthusiasm wash over him, happy to be invited into their world. Amos cracked jokes and left greasy handprints on both of them. Naomi and Amos did half their communicating without any words at all, exchanging deep looks and then swiveling their eyes back to him. It was disorienting and unfamiliar, but Holden was getting used to it.
Naomi’s heart was guarded, but she showed Holden glimpses: slipping her hand silently into his when Alex wasn’t around to see, delivering complements that weren’t entirely laced with sarcasm. There were so many promises in the way her eyes would soften at the end of the day, inviting him back to her bed. Holden babbled out his hopes and dreams to her in the nights, after Amos had left to sleep alone. Holden felt that he was opening his heart completely. He was afraid he was overwhelming Naomi but he couldn’t stop, carried away on the rush of what they were becoming, who the three of them might be to each other.
Holden felt strange about sharing so much intimacy with Naomi while Amos was off in his own bunk, but the other man showed not a trace of jealousy. Or interest. “Amos isn’t on that level,” Naomi had said when Holden confessed his guilt about excluding him. “Feelings are difficult for him, and he’s usually happy to avoid this kind of thing entirely.” Holden had wondered how she could stand to be in a relationship with someone like that, to which she replied, “oh, he has his ways of showing you he cares.”
Amos’ feelings didn’t come through in his face, or his words, but in his actions. He interrupted Holden’s newsfeed binges during his turn at watch on the command deck, silently offering a coffee and a vacuum-sealed Martian snack. Holden started venting all of his fears about war between Mars and the Belt, and what it might mean that his face was being used in fringe-OPA broadcasts encouraging terrorist activities. Amos took it all in, nodding. “Is there anything you can do about it right now?” he asked simply. When Holden shook his head in defeat, Amos smirked and started giving him something else to think about.
Holden didn’t think he had done anything in particular to win Amos over. He just went where Naomi did, and apparently was ready to love whatever she loved. Or perhaps whoever. Holden wondered how he had gotten so fortunate, to be able to wrap the two of them around his heart. But when he looked at Naomi, Holden thought he understood Amos perfectly. He wanted to do whatever would make her happy too. And maybe one day he’d be able to share that heart, as well.