Chapter Text
Meeting her
I still remember the first day we met,how my heart felt like it would explode if I stared at your smile for too long and how I thought that you were the most gorgeous girl I had ever seen in person. Not even the models on the magazine covers could be compared to you.
It was cloudy when we first met but your smile seemed to make the day just a little bit brighter and more bearable. I remember the first time we went over to eachothers houses and how it was awkward at first but slowly but surely we became at ease with eachother,talking and laughing about dumb and stupid shit. I will always remember your laugh,its forever etched into my very soul.
As time went on people would always see us as 'the' duo,always together,never seen apart unless one of us were sick or out of the country. We were conjoined at the hip,or I thought we were.
I knew I was already in far too deep from the moment you smiled at me,so bright and warm it made my stomach tingle. As time went on we got busy with school and she got busy with other friends. I didnt have anyone but her (no I wasn't like a leech dw I was fine doing things without her and stuff like that). As she got more and more busy with other people I realised how truly alone I was without her by my side to make me laugh,and how it was beginning to eat at me inside.
I was always left out of group activities in school and out of school,no one told me anything about plans but I could hear them outside chatting away about how excited they were to do this or that (this part is abt my neighbours down my road,all my age or 2 years older).
She was beginning to forget about me and made it quite clear when she would make plans without me or even acknowledging that she was making them infront of me with no indication of inviting me or including me. Most of the times we would hang out were only because her (main) friend was too busy to go or couldn't go. (This is a few years after I met her so obvi she changed after secondary school and all that).
I was always someone's back up friend,no matter the scenario I always seemed to be pushed into the shadows. I wasn't wanted around by anyone. I reminis about the earlier times when me and her would just converse for hours on end about anything and everything and then I look back to now and feel so sad that it genuinely hurts my heart.
I love this girl but she dosent love me back,i need to get over her and realise that this will probably repeat with someone else in the future and I just need to grow up.
You'll always have a room in my soul,no matter how many years go by,even if i will have no room in yours,love forever Ari.