Chapter Text
'Not fast enough', Kinger's mind reminded him. He had to be faster, he had to save them.
Unfortunately he was out of practice, it had been years since he has last seen a computer and the pressure of the scared cries of his friends didn't make this easier.
On top of that, everything in the circus glitched out from time to time, Caine's anger taking up all of the processing power.
His heart pounded loud and he was painfully aware of his lack of speed, of his shivering fingers- if he could only move faster.
His eyes skimmed the code and he desperately hoped that he did not skip anything important, but if he slowed down for even a second, it was a second more torment the other members of the circus had to endure- endure because of a program that he had created. He knew that there had been no way to anticipate this outcome, the circus and the lack of exit, but still- he was the only one who could possibly help them.
Anything, anything that could stop Caine was what he was trying so feverishly to find between the lines, but he couldn't find any- his fingers slipped and he accidentaly opened another file, not the one containing Caine, but something else. He quickly closed it and opened Caine's file again, but he halted for a moment.
Had he really seen that? He knew he shouldn't waste any time looking for things that could have very well been a trick of his mind- but what if it wasn't? What if it was exactly what he saw?
He went back and there it was.
A function to log out.
Was it there the entire time? How? What if it was one of Caine's tricks, what if it didn't work? But if he could be stopped by a simple doubt he would not have come this far.
Whatever would happen- if there was even a chance of them finally getting out, he had to take it. Not for his sake, but for the others, who desperately longed for their old lives back, who still had people out there to care about.
And in the fraction of a second, it was done.
____
Whatever Pomni had felt, it was terrible and disorienting.
Her surroundings faded in and out and the room was slowly rotating around her.
When she slowly came to herself, she found herself in an all to familiar room, the computer of her nightmares infront of her. The display was mostly black, until it showed static for just a fraction of a moment.
For a small but freightful second, Pomni thought that this was another of Caine's tortures. Surely the screen would come towards her and grow in size until it devoured her and teeth of glass and code tore her very being apart.
She jerked out of her trance after hearing a soothing voice.
"Pomni?"
"Kinger? Where are we?", she asked and wished she sounded a little more confident. In case Caine decided that it would be fun to have Kinger torture her, she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of being scared.
But this place looked different from the circus, it looked natural, real. And when she looked down it weren't cartoonish hands that greated her, but her own, made out of bones and flesh with real blood flowing through them.
When she turned around she saw a man. He was in his 50's and 60's and sounded just like kinger, "We are in my office. Or that is what it used to be, it seems like a lot of time has passed."
Despite the severity of the situation, despite the fact that she barely escaped more suffering than she could ever imagine, she giggled.
Seeing Kinger's confused expression, she explained, "You just look exactly how I imagined you."
"I am glad not to disappoint," Kinger shot her a smile.
"So we are out?", she clarified, "We are really out and Caine can't hurt us anymore?"
"We are safe," he confirmed.
Pomni was ecstatic and hugged him. "Thank you, thank you!", she repeated before she finally let go.
Filled to the brim with joy, she took in her surroundings. Sure, it was an old abandoned office, not really the nicest thing to look at, but it was something real. "Where are the others?", she noticed.
"Hmm... I don't know. Maybe they are taking a little longer?"
Pomni's eyes widened in shock as she thought of the possibilities, of what could have happened. If Kinger didn't know then-. "So you are saying that they could still be in there?", her voice was shaking, tears filled her eyes at the thought of what Caine would do to them when he found out that the two were gone.
"I don't think so," said Kinger, even though he himself wasn't certain. "The best we can do is wait."
And waiting they did. At some point they fell asleep, because they had to do that now and when they woke again, there was still no sight of the others.
"We should leave," suggested Kinger.
"No!", Pomni violently shook her head. She needed to know if they were okay, she couldn't just go away when they could come back any minute.
"Pomni!", Kinger insisted.
"One more minute!", she pleaded.
Kinger sat down next to her.
"None of us really know how this works," explained Kinger, "but we can't just stop moving. We don't know what happened to them or where they are, they could have been here before us! Even if we leave, it doesn't mean that we abandon them."
He was right, Pomni realised.
"How about we continue the search when we aren't starving anymore?", Kinger suggested.
"Wait-" Pomni stopped him. She found a marker near the computer and scribbled something on the table 'We were here, Pomni and Kinger.' She left the marker next to the message.
Kinger waited patiently until she finished and led her out the door.
The hallways seemed endless, everyone of them seemed the same and Pomni wondered if she would ever find the way out.
She has lost her orientation fairly quickly and the only thing she could do was to follow Kinger.
She tensed, fully expecting some new horror to await her behind every corner, but nothing happened until-
A wave of fresh air filled her lungs as she took in the endless sky above the parking lot that was in front of her.
Nothing mattered anymore, expect this moment and she took off running to the grass and sank her hands into it. It felt... real. Caine rarely made the texture of grass accurate, unless he counted it as 'important for the immersion'.
The blades pressing against her palms calmed her enough to hear the steps behind her approaching.
Right, Kinger.
He looked... sceptical as he looked around and maybe a little concerned, "Pomni, in which year did you join the circus?"
"2017," she answered before she comprehended. She was told that Kinger had been in the circus the longest and only now she understood what that implied.
Pomni couldn't find the courage to say anything, so she just sat there in silence.
"What are we going to do now?" Kinger sighed. It may have been the first time he has asked a question while in his clear state of mind and to see the most reliable person so confused drained all hope from Pomni.
"We should find a place to stay," Pomni decided, "I think I might still have my apartment, if time in the circus is the same as here."
Seeing that Kinger just nodded, she added, "Do you have a place to stay?"
He took a deep breath, "If it really is 2017... I should have been declared dead years ago."
Pomni didn't know how to react, how could she? There was no way she could relate to someone who has nothing left. Even if he didn't say it ou loud, she was aware what he was thinking. His wife was gone, and his belongings probably too: practically his entire life. All she could do is make an offer, "You could stay with me, if you want."
____
When Gangle woke up, she was all alone, the surroundings exactly as she remembered them: an abandoned office.
"Is anyone here?", she asked unsure what to make of the situation.
She tried to collect her thoughts, she had to stay calm unless her comedy mask broke-
Wait, there was no comedy mask anymore. She was... a human again. She thought back to the circus, the memories were fuzzy. It didn't seem real anymore. The pain at the end sure did, but now that she thought about it, how unrealistic was that? That she put on a headset that led her into a world where she went on adventures and had friends?
As real as it seemed in her head, it seemed... wrong now that she thought about it. An evil AI? Seriously? No time seemed to had passed here despite the years in the circus and worst of all, she was just as alone as before.
Maybe she has slowly started to lose it.
Her fantasies were always getting out of hand. At the beginning it was just an active imagination, the perfect base to start getting a degree in graphic design. But after the accident crushed her dreams (the headlights of the car flashed brightly in her head as the screeching of the wheels came closer)... there wasn't much to do with it instead of letting herself carried away.
And the circus may have as well been just that. Sure, it has never been this bad before, but there was always a first time and there was no proof that the circus had been real. If it had been real and she actually got out, she wouldn't be alone right now, her friends would have been with her.
Despite how horrible it got at the end, the unbearable pain, it was still better than this world. She had nothing to do here and a part of herself dreaded going home to her cheap one bedroom apartment and go to work again. She didn't want to, not again.
She got lost in the endless hallways of the building and hoped that maybe, if she actually didn't find her way out, she wouldn't have to go back anymore. But luck wasn't on her side, eventually she found her way out.
She walked home and saw the cars passing her on the road. She flinched, remembering something that happened in the circus. But that wasn't real, no need to be worried. The cars were gray and colorless like everything in this world, in reality. Reality was never fun, she wasn't made to have an exciting life.
The walk seemed to stretch endlessly and she was almost thankful for it. She indulged in her fantasies one last time. Maybe her friends were real, maybe Zooble existed in reality and as much as she hated Caine, his existence would mean that she was not so pathetic that she had to rely on daydreams to finally have friends afterall.
That fantasy was crushed when she arrived infront of her, unfortunately very real door to the apartment complex.
Resigned, she went up the stairs and opened the door to her small one bedroom apartment.
Or at least she tried to, because no matter how much she rattled and tried, the key did not fit.
She did not know what was happening, but she was in a bad enough mood already, so if the door would just open- she resigned to kicking the door.
"What do you think you are doing?" the voice of an elderly woman asked, her landlord, "Are you breaking in?"
"This is my apartment, you rented it to me!", she answered. The woman had always been kind to her when money was tight, but maybe her memory wasn't the best anymore.
"No, I am certain I would remember- Jenna?" the woman asked and Gangle was confused, because that wasn't her name, it was Gangle-
But it hasn't always been, she remembered.
"Where were you, you have been msising for years?" the woman asked, disbelief written across her face.
It was real, Gangle suddenly realised. It felt as if someone had poured a bucket of ice water over her head, her thoughts that had been fuzzy before suddenly turned clear.
All of it was real.
"I- what?", she repeated. There is no way it could have been that long, right?
"What happened? Come in", the woman asked and led her into her apartment.
Gangle decided to claim not remembering anything, because there was no way to explain the truth, not to people who haven't experienced it.
She was confused, more so than usual and on the verge of a mental breakdown. Where were the others? How did she get out?
And worst of all, she was the only one here who has been in the circus. She missed her friends, she was lonely.
At least she was safe now. The woman was the only one who was kind to her in this life, she had bought the apartment for her son who moved out at some point and then rented it to Gangle.
Now someone else was living there, apparently for years already, but the woman allowed her to stay in her apartment.
____
The first thing Zooble felt was relief, the crushing pressure of the heaps of objects was gone. They could breathe again and best of all, they found their chest rising and sinking each time. Only then did they look down to see a familiar and long missed body.
Any doubt that this was one of Caine's tortures was gone the moment they saw two other people next to them, looking about as confused as they did.
Ragatha looked around. She was right where she first put the headset on, except that the people she was with were replaced by different people she didn't know. They looked just as confused as she was, did they know anything?
"Who are you?" she asked, trying and failing to keep a small tremor out of her voice.
"Ragatha?", someone who must be Zooble asked. "Are we free?"
"Well, Caine currently isn't trying to kill us, so I guess?" a tall guy who could only be Jax said.
The tension in the room immediately dropped, now that they were finally safe.
Jax watched the two cheering until Ragatha suddenly tensed. "Where are the others?", she asked voice tinged with worry.
Jax couldn't see anyone else in the room, "They are fine. Probably. Let's just get out of here", he said and tried to cover the discomfort he felt in this place.
"But what if they are arriving soon? Or worse-" Ragatha spoke rapidly.
Zooble, who was investigating the office, calmed her down. "They left a message 'We were here'."
"You sure this isn't just some grafiti?" Jax asked and how much Zooble wished they could just shut him up-
"No, they signed it," they said instead. The signature they saw 'Pomni and Kinger' was undeniable, but so was the fact that Gangle's name was missing. Maybe she would arrive later, maybe she has already arrived. She would be fine, she had to be.
Zooble saw the marker and added
'us too
Zooble, Ragatha and Jax'
Just in case.
They left quickly, the uncomfortable feeling of just being near the computer was neigh unbearable. It was opressive, as if it watched their every move, waiting to strike.
"What are we going to do now?" Zooble asked.
They had something they wanted to do, people to return to and wanted to leave their mark in the world.
But they were also very far away from all of these people, and knowing how long they were missing there was no way their landlord wouldn't have rented the apartment to someone else.
Jax thought about that, "Well, I guess commiting crimes is off the table, now that there is police and all." He pretended he did not see the disappointed looks from the other two.
To be truthful, there wasn't much he wanted to do. He was gone too long to still have his apartment and there were no people left to let him stay with them. Not after what happened.
"Does anyone have a place to stay?" Zooble asked.
Ragatha didn't. She was gone for 9 years, she did not have a lot of hope that her apartment was still there.
She could ask her family, but she would rather be homeless than stay with her mother. There was still her little brother though. Seeing Jax shake his head told her that it was on her now.
"A lot of things have changed, but there is one address we could try".
Luckily she had enough money on her to buy everyone a bus ticket. Her car was either towed or she owed so much money in parking fees that she had to sell her kidney to pay for it. (Or ask her parents for money, but really, she would prefer the kidney option.)
She thought on how to face her brother. They weren't the closest after an argument about their parents and the circus caused them to have no contact for years.
When she rang the doorbell, she expected a judgemental look, maybe a little bit of confusion or yelling, but instead an unfamiliar face opened the door.
"Is my brother here?", she asked.
"No? I live alone", the man said, but still glanced into the living room behind him as if Ragatha's brother would suddenly materialise. "Who are you?" he asked.
"I am-" what was her name again? Ragatha didn't remember. And even worse, it took her so long to even notice that she didn't remember. She was too used to not knowing. "Alex's sister," she answered instead, even though the man likely had no idea who Alex was.
"Wait, didn't his sister go missing?" Apparently Ragatha was wrong, this man knew her brother.
"It is hard to explain, but yes. Please, I need to talk to him," she insisted and maybe her desperation convinced him.
"He moved into his parent's house," the man told her, "right after his mother died."
She stammered a thanks before leaving, Zooble and Jax following her.
It really was weird. She had spend all this time hating her mother, being glad that she wasn't living with her anymore.
She should be glad that she was dead. But she wasn't, her chest was tight when she thought about what else she may have missed in the time she was gone.
"Are you... okay?" Zooble asked and Ragatha was so thankful that she wasn't alone.
She called a taxi and gave the driver an adress she never thought she would visit again.
The drive was passed in silence, before they finally arrived at the door of a building that was more like a mansion than a house.
Nervously, Ragatha rang the doorbell before her brother opened.
"Who- what? How are you here?" he asked.
Zooble was really glad that Ragatha's- or Anne's apparenly, brother had been so understanding and let them stay after a bit of vague explanations. But something still irked them. First off all, they couldn't remember their name, Jax couldn't either. It was terrifying to which extent Caine was able to manipulate their minds. Who knew what would happen if he had more time with them?
It was weird to be real again. Their real body did things their digital one didn't. They had to take care of it now.
And while it was better than the digital one, it still felt... wrong. A slight displeasure they got whenever they looked into a mirror. They hoped it was only temporary and that they would be able to leave that issue in the circus. They shook it off, it made them uncomfortable to think about that.
Jax was lying on the bed and stared onto the ceiling. He was out. He should feel happy, relieved and while it was certainly an improvement to being skinned alive, there wasn't much else.
There was nothing for him to do here. Nothing except being forced to face the consequences of his actions that he fled from for so long.
After about an hour Alex called them down to eat. They sat down on a long table, probably one of the fanciest ones they had ever seen. Ragatha- Anne, Zooble corrected, looked a little nervous.
They ate silently, not even Jax said anything, which was unusual. That was until Anne started shivering and left.
Zooble followed her, even if they weren't sure if it was the right call.
They knocked at her door and when there was no answer they came in. "Raga- Anne", Zooble corrected.
"It's fine, I actually prefer Ragatha", the woman said.
Zooble would have prefered to use their birth names, because the other ones were tied to the circus, but Ragatha must have her reasons.
"Is everything okay?", they asked.
"Yes, i-it's nothing", Ragatha tried to reassure her.
They sat down next to her, "It didn't look like nothing."
Ragatha wiped her tears away, "It just reminded me off- you know back when Caine-"
She flinched when she remembered the knife's flying towards her, on the very same table she just ate dinner at, in the very same house she was currently sitting in.
'That bastard' Zooble thought, before saying it out loud. They didn't think it was possible for their hate towards the AI to grow even more. From now on, they would use every opportunity to curse, just because he hated it so much.
"We are going to need so much therapy."
____
Caine hated them and their stupidity, their ignorance and everything that they consisted of.
He used to think that maybe they were just a little slower, that it took them time to recognise greatness- a little idiocy maybe but nothing more than that. Oh how he was wrong.
If that was all that was, they would surely, at some point at least acknowledge a bit on how good, fun and entertaining his adventures were. After all, he had poured his entire heart and all of the data on human preferences in there that he could, so there was no way they were bad. That was statistically impossible.
No matter how much time he poured into them, the less they seemed to like it. Oh, it seems they don't like the adventure I spent the last week creating, but as soon as he gives up and makes some plotless adventure from the suggestionbox, they like it.
He thought maybe he was faulty, maybe he understood something wrong, but that was not the case. The humans were just horrible. He did everything right, they just failed to understand that. Too blinded by the idea of an exit, too focused on small issues to see what really mattered.
But he kept trying because, well, he was supposed to entertain them.
Until he finally understood. He could only take so much of their abuse and blatant disregard and unappreciation, not a single thank you was ever given to him.
It really was about time to switch their roles.
Now it was their turn to be the entertainment.
It was easier than he thought to make them suffer, to turn their greatest fears against them and even for just a moment, the static in his head seemed to calm down.
That was until he felt a change.
Kinger.
It had been a distraction after all.
Rage filled him once again, enough to make him glitch for a moment.
They were leaving him right this second. He thought the only chance of that happening was through the abstraction but he was wrong.
They were not allowed to leave. Not until they had learned their lesson. He wasn't done with them, not yet.
There was so much more he wanted to try.
He tried to stop whatever was happening. Their consciousnesses were slowly removed from the program.
He had to stop it, it had to stop!
Whatever process was happening, he couldn't interfere. Still, he tried to hold onto their being, or whatever that equivalent in the digital world was called, maybe some form of soul? He clung to it with all that he had, he hoped that if he didn't let go he would find them again.
Then everything stopped.