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"I do not like Chuuya!" An earth-shattering sound came from the Port Mafia's building, more specifically from the throat of a seventeen year old mafiaso. Dazai was 100% positive that yell would've certainly be heard by the whole headquarters, actually all of Yokohama, if it wasn't for the sound proof walls. Unluckily though, the subject of the matter was standing right next to him, staring at him with wide eyes and an agape mouth, shocked. Dazai took a quick glance at Chuuya, why is that's chibis eyes so pretty, he thought before pushing it to the very back of his mind, saving it for another time. The evidence of that thought was still on his face in the form of a blush.
Now that he thinks about it, he really doesn't like Chuuya. Of course they spend every waking moment of the day beside each others side, hold hands, blush whenever the other one is still close, comfort each other whenever their not fighting, but that doesn't mean that he likes Chuuya! Chuuya would never reciprocate those feelings anyway, so what right does he have to cross that line?! The only reason that he was feeling a little light-headed and had a burning face was because he was coming down with a cold. An awful, horrible cold.
Silence filled the room for a few moments before Dazai remembered who else was in the room. Currently there were three people: Himself, The Chibi and Mori who brought up Dazais definitely-not-love-feelings in the first place. The trio was currently in the latters office. Out of the window the sun merging with the ocean could be seen, many colours filled the sky before it would soon become dark and empty once more; it could be called beautiful. Only then did Dazai slap his hand onto his mouth.
Mori stared at the both of them for a while before deciding on his next words "You are both are dismissed, I'll hand you the documents to look through." It was off character for Mori to let this go so easily, but Dazai wasn't acting in Character as well. None of them were. Dazai who was usually calculating couldn't process a singular thought and Chuuya who was quick to fight was standing in a daze, most likely also questioning his entire sexuality.
Unlike Chuuya who was as still as a dead person, Dazai immediately left the room, not looking back. Dazai knew it was disrespectful to leave without saying anything to acknowledge his bosses presence, but he didn't give a flying fuck right now.
As he paced down the halls of the Port Mafia building he thought about what the fuck just happened. Why did he respond like that? He could've made a snark comeback or outright deny it, but what if he hurt Chuuyas feelings in some way? Well that wouldn't be possible because he doesn't like me, if anything he's probably felling assured that I don't have any feelings for him. Comforted even! Somehow that thought hit like a bullet to his chest.
Obviously Dazai knows he doesn't feel love in general, but that thought being implanted in his head brought up some restless feelings and old pushed away thoughts that he didn't want to face. For example: Do I like chuuya?
Before Dazai could proceed with the complex process of figuring out his sexuality, he realised his body subconsciously brought himself to the building's elevators.
Dazai always took the stairs; the elevator in the building was way to slow. Comparing the elevator to a snail race...let's just say he'd rather watch the snail race. Hence why even though it was annoying taking the stairs he put up with it.
The stairs were on the other side of the building and Dazai really couldn't be bothered walking all that way, so now he had to wait ages to get to the bottom floor just so he can go home. I hate this building. Dazai though bitterly and stepped in the elevator
As of late Dazai had been going home at early morning hours and still had a stack of paperwork on his desk. Despite that, Dazai went home knowing full well that stack would double it's size. A mountain of paperwork is still better than staying in this building any longer and have to face the chance of running into Chuuya-
Why the fuck is Chuuya standing next to him? When the fuck did chuuya begin standing next to him?! Had he been in the elevator this whole time! How did he not notice?!
If looks could kill, Dazai was positive he had died multiple times already. "Chuuya-?" Dazai began before he cut himself off.
Chuuya was currently much more composed then he was, which wasn't fair! The brunette could feel sweat pooling up on his forehead, as his face burned, looking like a ripe tomato. Am I sick? Dazai decided he was and took a step away from Chuuya; he didn't want to get his dog sick as well. Chuuya for some reason had other plans and took a step closer to Dazai.
"Chuuya I think I'm sick, please stay away." His voice was sincere that is was almost creepy, especially compared to his usual sarcastic tone.
Dazai forced out a cough, he wasn't sure why he was pretending to be sick if he was already sick and he certainly did not understand why, under any circumstances, Chuuya would want to come closer to him, especially when they are already in a confined space.
Tearing his eyes away from Chuuya, who still looked like he was going to throw Dazai off a roof, Dazai turned his attention to the elevators floor count...it was only half way there! Dazai internally groaned I need to complain to Mori about this. The elevator made a screeching noise and pulled to a stop on the 49th floor. Dazai looked out, expecting another person to walk in and save him from this rabid dog, but the space outside the elevator was empty.
Dazai sometimes pushed the button and ran to annoy people, which Chuuya scolded him for. Most though would just leave after five minutes of pushing the button because they didn't want to wait, which is likely what happened.
Closing at a painful speed, the elevator doors slowly began to shut. Dazai realised this must be an opportunity sent from God as a chance to escape and made a dash for the elevators door, but not even two steps out he felt figers tighten around his wrist. The brunnte looked behind him and saw two different shades of pupils: one brown, one blue.
Dazai always admired Chuuya's heterocromia eyes; he thought they were beautiful. Chuuya thought otherwise though, so Dazai made a habit out of reminding him of how one of his eyes looks like the ocean and the other was like a hug embracing you. Is that normal for friends? Dazai always stole peeks of the gingers eyes, but he never got to seem them this close to his own. He was captivated.
Do not fret though dear readers, for Dazai snapped back to reality when he was tugged back into the elevator by Chuuya as the doors shut, once again trapping the two -or at least one of them- inside.
"Chuuya, didn't I say I was sick? Does my dog really want my germs that badly. Ewww." Dazai commented to which Chuuya replied at rapid fire.
"Shut up, Makeral. I'm not your dog and don't think I don't know you're faking being sick; I'm not the idiot, you are." With that, Chuuya rolled his eyes and the elevator started to descend again. Holy shit, why is this elevator so damn slow!?
The air surrounding them wasn't awkward, but stiff, or maybe it was both. Either way Dazai pulled out his phone as an attempt to avoid that moment and seem preoccupied.
If he could, Dazai would like to pretend what Mori said never happened. Despite the bickering, teasing and fighting, Dazai and Chuuya share a mutual trust; Dazai relies on Chuuya and vice versa. If that trust were to be broken he wouldn't just lose a valuable asset, but his partner.
Dazai has known Chuuya for nearly two years now, a long time when you're so young. Is it really that bad if he wants to spend another year? He reminds himself that even if it's just a year, as long as he got to say bye that's all that matters. What's so strange about it though is that Dazai has never been one for Goodbyes, so why is Chuuya the exception?
Although Dazai grabbed his phone out, he got swept up in his thoughts again, so it just sat in his hand on the lock screen. Chuuya glanced at Dazai and noticed this, smirking. "What? did you forget your password? You can't remember shit, can you!" Dazai just responded by entering his passcode and began checking his emails, refreshing countless times, but none appeared. How does Dazai, a port mafia executive, the boss's right-hand man, not have a single god damn email?
"Are you blind or something?" Chuuya whispered loud enough for Dazai to hear.
"Bad dog! Don't you know dogs are supposed to respect their owners?" Dazai scolded, going so far as to poke Chuuya.
"I'm not your dog, damn it!"
Noticing their close proximity, the brunette backed away from his 'dog' and once again stared at the door. Twentieth floor, Thought Dazai, I really do need to complain about this. Did he really mind it though? Yes, yes he did.
19th floor,
18th floor,
17th floor.
Truly painful. Growing more impatient and uncomfortable by the minute, Dazai subconsciously started to pick at his bandages, scratching himself. The redhead beside him wasn't any better; tapping his feet on the floor, counting the seconds.
16th floor,
15th floor,
14th floor.
Trapped in a trance, Dazai continued to pick his skin until he felt cold leather grip his wrist once more. Instinctively Dazai tried to pull away, but the grip was too tight, it was as if he were trapped by iron claws. Calming himself down, Dazai sighed and settled on the thought of teasing chuuya to escape.
Continuing with this plan he opened his mouth, but chuuya gripped his wrist even harder. Dazai gasped and looked down. He then noticed the dishevelled state of the bandages that were wrapped around him; they were starting to fall off.
Only then did Dazai realise what he had been subconsciously doing and gave Chuuya a fond smile, knowing that he was only trying to help him. "Silly dog." Chuuya was expressionless, but as soon as those words left Dazai's mouth, he immediately became enraged.
"How many times have I told you that I am not your dog, so just shut up!" Before Dazai even thought about what to say next, two words left his mouth.
From years of bickering with Chuuya, Dazai has gotten used to immediately replying when arguing with him, making sure to be just as snark about it. He spent day after day coming up with ways to torement Chuuya. He managed to hit the perfect spots every time, making Chuuya annoyed, but not annoyed enough to punch Dazai. Darn those damn instincts, for they made Dazai forgot what he had been thinking about for the past 15 minutes.
13th floor,
12th floor,
11th floor.
Those two words were- "Make me."
10th floor,
9th floor
8th floor
Chuuya did just that and pushed the two closer together. Their bodies were pushed together so tightly that Dazai thought they could not get any closer even if they tried. The ginger hesitatied for a moment while Dazai admired Chuuya's eyes. That moment quickly passed when Dazai sealed the deal and softly pressed his lips on Chuuya's. The kiss was gentle, but the taste of cherry chapstick was overpowering. I didn't know chuuya used chapstick...Its my favourite fruit. Dazai noted.
7th floor,
6th floor,
5th floor.
The brunette's heart was pounding as if it was going to explode at any second, but his heart could not leave until this kiss was done!
Dazai was quite awkward at first but soon relaxed into the position they were in, not daring to let go. When chuuya finally pushed away, loud puffs could be heard across the confined space. That was nice... WAIT DID I JUST KISS CHUUYA!" With that thought Dazai truly did explode, turning his face into a flaming hot fire for the nth time today.
That was the moment when the realisation hit him. Dazai quickly put distance between him and Chuuya and faced the wall, rotting in embarrassment. Chuuya also looked away. Dazai couldn't see his face, but he swore he could faintly see his chibi's ears turning red. Cute, Dazai thought.
Breathing in and out, Dazai forced himself to calm down. For the first time since leaving the office, Dazai finally could sit with his thoughts for a moment. I mean, chibi will probably take a while to process what just happened. I should give him space. That's exactly what he did, give him space, like a good owner, by distracting himself with his thoughts.
4th floor,
3rd floor,
2nd floor.
Dazai had always wondered what love was. Some see it as a virus, contaminating their body. Some see as a familiar friend showing up uninvited once more. Some see it as a stranger walking past them. What was Love to Dazai though? He didn't know.
Maybe Love is just a feeling, a warm hug on summers day, but can turn cold throughout the seasons. Maybe love is an enemy that he needs to eliminate, but saves for no reason. Maybe it's a neighbour pestering his whole life seeking answers it doesn't deserve. Maybe it's a parents' comfort that fades away with age but sticks with the memories.
Or maybe, Love was just Love.
1st floor.
Chuuya walked out of the elevator not saying anything.
While at the start of their elevator trip Dazai was a blushing mess and Chuuya was completely calm (or in Chuuya's way of doing things, ready to fucking punch him), the roles seemed to be swapped now...somewhat.
Dazai watched Chuuya's fleeting presence as he walked out the elevator himself. Only a few people were in the lobby milling around. Some noticed the scene of a mafiaso storming out of the building and an other one close behind, but didn't dare to say anything.
Chuuya hopped into a taxi, drove back to his apartment and drowned himself in his most expensive wine, while Dazai decided to walk to his container, enjoying the stars and the full moon that lit up the skies on the sidewalk.
When Dazai got back to his 'home', he didn't sleep all night, rethinking all his life choices and replaying every interaction the two had ever been through. One small thought lingered throughout the whole night.
I'm in love.