Chapter Text
Dazai's ears were ringing. Quite loudly if one might say and he was dissociating. He heard a even louder ring. He still wasn't sure it was the doorbell or his own ears but atleast he started coming back to the real world.
Ugh Disgusting. Dazai doesn't like the real world.
He hears the ring again and this time is sure that someone is that his door. He decided to get out of the bathtub. He quickly wrapped new bandages around his arms and chest, before taking a towel and putting it around his waist.
The doorbell rings again. Its Chuuya. Dazai remembers his text a few hours ago. Too bad he's probably gonna get hit when he finally opens the door.
"What the fuck were you doing, mackeral?" Oh Chuuya is beautiful. So beautiful. Dazai would love to drown in his ocean blue eyes except for drowning in his bathtub.
Dazai smirked, composing himself. "I was in the shower, chibi."
Chuuya just rolled his eyes and entered his apartment, shoving past him. He had a takeout bag with him, which was now placed at the kitchen counter.
"So, You brought food for me! I am truly touched, Chuuya." Dazai pretended to clutch his bandaged covered chest.
"Oh fuck off, you bandage wasting machine. I was hungry myself and I was coming here already." Chuuya paid no mind to a dramatic Dazai and started taking out the food for it. It wasn't anything fancy. Just fries, burgers and miso soup. Dazai was more than grateful for it. He hadn't eaten anything since morning. The pills always leave a bitter aftertaste in his mouth and he doesn't want to get out of his bed. Not that he usually does but its always worse after the pills.
Dazai sighed sitting on the couch. He doesn't really want to eat but he will because otherwise Chuuya would probably punch the heck out of him and he isn't keen on doing on that today. Fuck, he's dizzy.
Chuuya casually settles beside him on the couch bringing the food and switching on the TV. "Put on some fucking clothes. Then we can eat." He says, scrolling through random things to watch.
"Why? Am I distracting you?" Dazai smirks, moving even closer and looking into Chuuya's eyes.
Chuuya just glares at him, "Fuck no. You're thin as a stick. Who do you're seducing looking like that?"
"You, ofcourse, my dear slug. Why else would be here if not for my charming body and looks?" Dazai loves teasing Chuuya. The faces Chuuya makes are so, so endearing. He could probably look at them forever.
Chuuya just scrunches his face and pushes Dazai off the couch, "If you don't put on some clothes, you're not getting any food here and I'll punch you too."
Classic Chuuya. He loves it. Dazai walks casually to his room before collapsing on his bed. He did take more of those pills than necessary and if Chuuya figures it out, he's gonna fuss and get mad over Dazai. He likes Chuuya's worried face but he knows its not the best course of action. As selfish he is, he wants Chuuya to be there and concerned Chuuya will make him sleep and he would lose the chance to touch him. He can't afford that today. So, he gets up and puts on a sweatshirt and pants before making his way back to Chuuya.
Chuuya is munching on the fries and has put on some show. Dazai doesn't care about that. Chuuya looks handsome, really handsome. Dazai wants to kiss him as he sits next to him.
"Who takes that long to put some sweats, mackeral?" Chuuya grumbles fixed on whatever he's watching on the TV.
Dazai snickers. Chuuya is too cute for Dazai's current state of being half dizzy, "A man has to dress up to get laid, doesn't he?"
"Oh shup up." Chuuya hits him with a pillow before sliding him the food. "Eat. And if you throw any tantrums, I'll throw you out the window."
Dazai takes the food and eats it slowly. It quite churns his stomach after being hungry for so long but atleast he feels better. They eat in silence while the characters in the drama Chuuya has put on argue. Its very domestic, more than Dazai can even hope for. Chuuya looks at peace too, sometimes making faces at the dumbness of the man on TV. Dazai likes it very much. He wishes he can have this everyday but its a very impossible thought he enjoys while it lasts.
Dazai cleans up the table after they finish in courtesy. Chuuya brought him food, he can do atleast this. He hopes it doesn't look too out of character for Chuuya to suspect anything.
Chuuya is surprised at Dazai's willingness to do something for once and Dazai can basically hear his thoughts. "What's with you today?"
"What?" Dazai raises his eyebrows.
"You know what. You never clean up after anything. You like to be a fucking mess and make me clean after." Chuuya scoffs.
Dazai chuckles. Oh so Chuuya. "Wow chibi, you're so worried for me. Well as a master, I think of it as my duty to clean up after my dog."
"Oh fuck you, asshole. I am not your dog." Chuuya throws another pillow at him when he returns from the kitchen.
"Oh my my. So Violent, my dog. You shouldn't behave like that. People will think you have gone rabid." Dazai teases him more. He likes pushing Chuuya's buttons.
Chuuya pushes him on the couch and straddles him, pining his hands on the sides of his head. "Call me your dog again and I am gonna fucking kill you."
Dazai likes it. Oh god. Dazai loves it when Chuuya takes control. When he gets all pining him against the wall and take him. He isn't sure if he wants to let Chuuya know that as it will certainly be used against him in the future so he just smirks. "Kinky"
"Fuck you, Dazai"
"Well I am not quite in the position, am I now?" Dazai says it like a challenge. And it bears him fruits because Chuuya's lips come crashing onto his. Its just Chuuya's soft lips moving roughly against him now. He can't feel anything else above Chuuya's lips on his and the desperate urge to touch Chuuya. But his hands are still trapped beneath Chuuya's.
"Let go. I wanna touch you." Dazai says as they break apart. His voice comes way breathy than expected and he feels exposed as Chuuya smirks and removes his hold over Dazai's hands.
Dazai frantically sits up with Chuuya still on his lap and his hands are on Chuuya's jaws as he kisses him again. Chuuya's hands tangle in his hair and he swore he moans in Chuuya's mouth. He loves this. This is so much better than the dizzying feeling the pills give him. He feels dizzy right now too but its good. Its so, so good. He is melting and he feels Chuuya is too by the way his hands are loosening in Dazai's hair. He can't taste anything other than Chuuya, the disgusting taste of pills is gone and its just Chuuya.
Chuuya. Chuuya. Chuuya.
"You're lovely." Dazai mutters as he catches his breath.
Chuuya smiles, actually smiles against Dazai's lips, still a bit breathless. "Am I now?"
"Yes. Very lovely." Dazai can't help but smile back before Chuuya catches his lips again. He loves this. Loves Chuuya. He loves him so much, it feels like he's gonna burst one of these days. It still feels surreal that Chuuya wants him, even if it is purely physical. Dazai so wishes he wasn't Dazai. That he was someone else. Someone less fucked up inside. Someone Chuuya could actually love. Someone- Oh fuck him. Chuuya's tongue is entering his mouth and he isn't able to form proper thoughts now. Chuuya's tongue is exploring his mouth and he is sure he's the closest to heaven that he'll ever be.
Fuck his feelings honestly. If Chuuya isn't minding then who is he to think right now. He wants this and he can't bring himself to care if this is going to ruin him more or fix him.
-----
Dazai is sprawled on Chuuya's chest breathing heavily. They don't say anything but its a comfortable silence. The kind that only happens with Chuuya. He doesn't feel the need to fill this silence but he wants to. So it doesn't morph into something real. He is afraid of that. Before he could speak, Chuuya breaks the silence. "Dazai?"
"Hm?" Dazai can feel the tiredness and dizziness of both the pill and sex catch up to him now.
Chuuya is quite soft when he is running his hands through Dazai's hair like he is right now. Dazai loves when Chuuya is rough with him, that is no secret but he loves it even more when Chuuya is being like this. But it scares Dazai so much.
"Get off me, You're heavy." Despite his harsh words, Chuuya's tone is quite docile.
Dazai chuckles slowly and makes no effort getting up, "But I am tired, Chibi. Can't we just sleep like this?" He whines.
Chuuya pushes him off gently than usual. "Once we clean up. And we can sleep in the bed. Your couch is way too small for two people."
Reluctantly, Dazai washes up and moves to the bed. Chuuya comes after a while in Dazai's clothes because he wants Dazai to faint due to his hotness. Dazai thinks its a crime that he is so fucking exhausted because of the pills that he can't go and suck Chuuya off. How gruesome of a punishment!
Chuuya finally settles beside Dazai and looks at him. "What? Why are you staring?"
"You're in my clothes, slug." Dazai says in a half sleepy voice, trying to smirk.
Chuuya rolls his eyes, "Do you want me to sleep in cum stained pants? You're acting like its the first time."
And I'll never get enough of it. He thinks. "You look even smaller in them."
"I will make you sleep on the couch outside." Chuuya mutters glaring at him.
Dazai snickers in amusement, "Its my own apartment, hatrack. How can you be so cruel?"
Chuuya smirks, "I am a fucking mafia executive, you dumbass and I do not care if its your apartment. I still can murder you in your sleep."
"You just can't get enough of me." Dazai sneers.
Chuuya just turns his back to Dazai now. "Shut up and go to sleep, mackeral."
"Goodnight Chuuya" Chuuya doesn't respond but grumbles before pulling the blanket over him.
Dazai wants to reach out and touch Chuuya. Touch Chuuya's hair. Wrap his arms around Chuuya's waist. Lay his face on Chuuya's back. Bury his face in Chuuya's neck. But he doesn't. He won't. He needs to get a grip.
Its easier to sleep tonight. He isn't sure if its because of Chuuya sleeping in the same bed as him or the pills. He doesn't have the energy to question it now. Chuuya's hair is the last thing he sees before succumbing to slumber.