Chapter Text
Two Time sits in the flower field where Azure asks them out on a date. It has been a long time since the two actually have time for each other. They make a scarf for Azure, hoping he will like it. It is nearly his birthday anyway.
It has been an hour when Azure arrives. He looks rushed, his clothes still dirty from his garden work, his hands holding a cake. As Two Time exchanged a greeting, Azure didn't even spare them a glance, but he seems embarrassed, angry, annoyed, or even... sad?
"Nightshade, I'm sorry for this, but I won't be dating you anymore-"
Two Time's breath hitched, they feel their heart drop
"You are relying too much on me. I can't do this anymore. I have to take care of my garden, my patient, and most importantly, myself. I can't just take care of you all day-"
Two Time feels tears at the corner of their eyes
"I'm sorry, don't cry, Two Time, I promised you would still be the one I care for the most. I bought you this cake, I hope you like it. I hope you get better, Two Time. I am sorry."
"It's okay, I'm all good, Azure, take your time! I will try my best!"
"I hope you find someone, Azure, someone better than me, then you don't need to care for someone like me. We will, separate, from now on. Thank you for everything."
"I have also made a scarf for you. I really hope you like it. It's nearly your birthday anyway. Farewell, Azure!"
They smile at him, brightly. He smiles back at them, but quickly hides it and basically walks away. It was
That's it. That's the end of their friendship, a relationship. They lose their best friend, their lover, their everything, all because they are clingy and needy.
"What a shame" they whisper.
They can't keep anything to themself. They are no good. They have lost everything, even the one whom they promised to keep forever, is gone. They have officially lost all of their friends, their boyfriend. They remembered everything good about him: his gentle voice, his gifts, his flowers, his gardens. Normally, they would just think those are rivals to their love, and it's like a dream comes true. They've lost the battle to his gardens. How foolish.
"Foolish Two Time
Foolish Two Time
Everyone hates you now. Azure hates you. Your mentor, Amarah, hates you, too. You are no good, Two Time. You are a pest in everyone's eyes."
Their schizophrenia is getting worse again. They see black figures in the corner of their eyes. They tried to grip on to anything, anything to ground them in reality. Anything to stop the episode, even if they know the chances are slim.
He's gone because something is wrong with them.
No one would want to be with an insane person. Two Time knows that. Even if Azure broke up with them, they can't bring themself to hate him. He deserves someone better, he should get a partner who treats him better. He should only worry about his garden, his favorite things to do, not them. They're worthless.
"You are such an INSANE, DISGUSTING. NEEDY. CLINGY. SICKLY. WORST. Person EVER"
It's starting to get worse again. They can't take it
They pray to the Spawn that Azure will get someone better than them
May they burn, but Azure gets eternal happiness
May they die, but Azure's garden is always fresh and pretty
May they disappear, but Azure's next spouse will be the best person ever
May the Spawn guide them
May they be reborn as Nightshade, his favorite flower
On the way back to his dorm, Azure couldn't help but start to cry.
He knows that they're suffering from their mental disorder.
He knows that they're suffering from their beliefs, their mentor, their "Spawn" nonsense.
He knows that they are dependent on him to take care of themself
Despite this, he left them. He has just done that. Not a good feeling, especially when he promised them he would never leave them, no matter what.
He just broke his promise
There is one thing he knows. They will not get better if he keeps being there and helping them. They will have to deal with their mental and physical health alone now. It will be the only way it can get better, or worse, but Azure knows he won't help them anymore.
Still, it feels wrong to abandon someone you've chased since the two were still teenagers. It feels wrong when last night he had just hold them in his embrace. It feels wrong when last month he just gave them the biggest bouquet. He can still remember what flowers they were. It feels wrong when they aren't here, lying next to him and sleeping peacefully.
Still, he stands his ground. He knows love won't fix it. His efforts alone won't fix it.
He knows they will struggle falling asleep without him. He knows Two Time will struggle with their hallucinations and voices without him. He knows they will struggle with self-care without him.
But he's exhausted. It's time to stand back and let them deal with that themself. It's time to let them know that only themself can make them feel better.
Maybe, hopefully, if he leaves, they will know how to take care of themself.
Closing the door after him, he mumbles
"Two Time, my Nightshade, my everything, I still very much love you."