Work Text:
You’re antsy ahead of your flight.
At the tender age of five, you’ve never been on a plane before, and even when you asked Bro what it was like, he just told you it was crowded and smelly and your ears would hurt. And there are no other kids at your gate—not big kids that you can play with, anyway; there’s a little baby, but Bro swore under his breath when he saw her, so you think you’d get in trouble if you tried to play with her. You can see some kids at the other gates, but every time you even think about getting up to go say hi, Bro glares at you like he can read your mind. You’re pretty sure he can, actually.
Just to have something to do, you’ve been sitting on the edge of your seat swinging your legs and peering at all of the people around you. If Bro is bothered by this, he’s not looking up from his magazine to stop you.
In the seat across from you, there’s a girl who doesn’t look quite like a grownup. She’s sitting between two much older grownups—a woman with greying hair and a man with a big bushy mustache you think looks so silly—sleeping with her head on the lady’s shoulder. You guess she must not be used to getting up this early. With beaming pride, you think that you’ve been getting up at dawn for training all summer; you’re starting Kindergarten soon, so you’ll have to do training in the morning or else you’d have to do it after it gets dark outside, which is scary. Obviously, you don’t tell Bro that you think it’s scary. That wouldn’t be very cool, and you’d probably get in trouble.
When it’s time to get on the plane, the lady nudges the girl awake, and all three of them look like some kind of emotion you don’t know the name of—some kind of happy-sad. The girl gives both of the grownups a hug before she picks up her suitcase, and you smile at first, until Bro lightly smacks the back of your head and you remember you’re not supposed to show feelings like that in front of other people. You’re not supposed to do it in private, either, but unless Bro really can read your mind, he can’t see you, so you can’t get in trouble if you smile while you play in your room sometimes.
The plane is crowded and smelly, but the lady sitting next to you offers you a piece of gum and says that’ll keep your ears from hurting. You’re not sure if it’s true or not, but you don’t think Bro would’ve lied to you and your ears don’t hurt until the little baby from the gate starts crying. You ask Bro if you can give her one of your toys from your suitcase, but he reminds you that your suitcase is on a different plane.
You guess that eventually you must fall asleep, because you’re woken up by Bro picking you up and grunting that it’s time to get off the plane. You expect him to put you back down in the aisle, but he doesn’t. He carries you all the way off the plane and down the long hallway to a gate a lot like the one you got on the plane from. Your brows pinch together.
You can’t remember the last time Bro carried you. Maybe when you were really little, like two years old. You think he might have picked you up because you were walking too slow, but now if you’re walking too slow then he just tells you he’s gonna leave you behind, so you’ve just had to learn to walk faster.
There’s a part of you that wants to kick your legs and demand he put you down so you can walk by yourself because you’re a big kid. Maybe this is a test, and you fail it if you don’t walk by yourself. Maybe he wants you to fight, like in training. On the other hand, maybe you’ll get in trouble if you do that. Bro doesn’t like it when you throw tantrums, which is anytime you get upset about things not going your way.
You don’t have that long to make a decision anyway before Bro suddenly stops walking.
You whip your head around to try to see why you stopped. You’re still in the airport; is there some sort of threat?
What you find is a lady maybe a little bit older than Bro sitting at a bar, and a girl about your age sitting on a stool next to her. The girl looks kind of pouty, like she doesn’t want to be here. You can’t help but think that you’d get in trouble if you were making a face like that.
The lady, though, lights up when she sees you—or maybe when she sees Bro; it’s kind of hard to tell.
MOM: hey! you made it!
BRO: I thought you were supposed to be driving us to your backwoods ass mansion.
MOM: oh relax! i had one drink an hour ago, rosie made sure of that. i am perfectly safe to drive
Your brows pinch together again. They’re talking like they know each other, but you’ve never seen this lady or even seen a picture of her or anything.
DAVE: whos that?
You resist the temptation to point at her like Bro might not know who you’re talking about. Bro’s arm tenses around you when she turns to look at you, still smiling. You want to smile back, but your eyes slide up to Bro behind your shades; he still looks as blank as ever, so you guess this isn’t the sort of moment where you’re allowed to smile. There aren’t very many of those.
MOM: hi dave! gosh, youre so big!
MOM: you can call me mommy
MOM: or just mom
MOM: rosies already started calling me mom, when she isnt calling me mother
ROSE: Yes, Mother, and I would prefer it if you would stop calling me Rosie, too.
You squint down at the girl. She looks your age, but she talks like a big kid. Or—a bigger kid. You’re already a big kid.
Mom looks back at Bro.
MOM: did you check a bag?
BRO: Of course I did.
MOM: oh christ, you didnt bring that thing, did you?
BRO: Of course I did.
MOM: ugh
MOM: dirk, you know i hate that thing!
Your eyes widen, and you’re grateful that Bro seems to be staring so hard at Mom, because from his angle, he’d definitely be able to see it behind your shades. You’ve never heard anyone call Bro anything but Bro before. You thought maybe his name was Cal, and that’s why Lil Cal is Lil, but you try not to think about it very much because you’re pretty sure Bro doesn’t want you to.
Bro finally sets you back down on the floor when you get your bags, which is probably mostly because Cal’s case takes up one whole arm, and he has to use his other hand to pull his suitcase that has his clothes and stuff in it. You have your own suitcase, which is red and has dinosaurs on it and which you’ve filled mostly with toys and a little bit with clothes and stuff. You think Bro probably packed some extra clothes for you in his bag, but if he didn’t you’ll just have to wear the same outfit for a few days or however long you’re supposed to be out here.
Without saying anything, Mom reaches down to hold onto your free hand. You peer up at her curiously. You don’t think anybody has ever held your hand before, and you’re not sure why she’s doing it. You decide to take your best guess.
DAVE: its ok
DAVE: im a fast walker so i wont get lost
DAVE: plus if i did get lost i know how to take care of myself, id be aight
You try to say the last part like Bro would, but you think you must have done it wrong, because Mom just looks sad. Rose stares at you looking curious, which you don’t like; it makes you feel like one of the weird animals at the zoo.
When you get to what you guess must be Mom’s car, she stops and stares.
MOM: dirk, i dont got a car seat for him
BRO: He doesn’t need a car seat.
MOM: what? of course he needs a car seat!
BRO: He’s fine. He’s five years old, he’s not a baby.
DAVE: im not a baby
You try to chime in helpfully to confirm that Bro is in fact telling the truth; of course you’re not a baby! You’re a big kid. Mom just looks sad again, though, and now you get some uncomfortable feeling in your tummy.
MOM: if theres no car seat then you have to sit in the back and hold him
BRO: Roxy, this is ridiculous.
MOM: the cars not movin until all the babies are buckled in one way or another!
BRO: This from the woman who’s drinking and driving?
MOM: oh shut up! youre just trying to distract from your shitty parenting
ROSE: Do you two know that you’re yelling at each other in front of your children?
They both turn to stare at Rose—even Bro, although you can’t see his eyes behind his shades, so you can’t tell if they’re wide like Mom’s are.
MOM: sorry sweetie
MOM: youre right
MOM: dirk, back of the car
To your amazement, Bro doesn’t argue with her this time. He bends down to pick you up again and climbs into the back of the car while Mom straps Rose into some fancy chair.
You don’t get in cars very much. Bro doesn’t own one because he doesn’t really leave the apartment that much and he says that you should be able to walk everywhere anyway. He rented one that one time that he took you to the beach, and you didn’t have a car seat or anything then. You don’t think you even wore a seatbelt or anything, but you can’t really remember anymore. You fell asleep not long into the drive.
You fall asleep on this drive, too.
By the time you wake up, it’s dark outside. You shrink into yourself a little, but you manage to keep yourself from pressing closer to Bro like he’ll protect you from the nighttime. You know that he would want you to protect yourself from the nighttime. You don’t really know how to do that, but you guess you’ll have to figure it out.
But when Bro gets you out of the car and sets you back down on the ground, Rose walks around the back and offers you her hand. You stare at it for a second, and then let your eyes flit up to peer nervously at Bro behind your shades. He doesn’t seem to be paying attention to you, though—he’s already walking ahead, and you can’t see very well in the dark with your shades still on, but you think he’s talking to Mom in a low murmur.
ROSE: Are you going to come inside?
ROSE: I guess you can stay outside if you’d like to, but it doesn’t seem like you would.
DAVE: how old are you
ROSE: Five.
ROSE: Is that relevant?
DAVE: you talk weird for a five-year-old
DAVE: you sound like a big kid
DAVE: using all sorts of big words
ROSE: I read a lot of books.
DAVE: do you read real books? like the ones on paper?
DAVE: i like to read too but i only get to read on bros computer cause the librarys too far to walk to
ROSE: Mom takes me to the library once a week.
ROSE: Plus she buys me a lot of books too, for my birthdays and stuff.
ROSE: So, yes, I read real books on paper.
ROSE: If you’d like, you can borrow some while you’re here.
Before you know it, you’re inside the house. You couldn’t really see it from outside because of the dark, but now, you realize that the place is humongous. You think this place might be the size of your whole apartment building. Or maybe a couple dozen apartment buildings.
There’s a big weird statue of a wizard, and Rose narrows her eyes at him like she doesn’t trust him. It makes you snort a little, but you’re able to cover it up before anybody notices. You think. Rose does glare at you, but she was already glaring, so it might not actually be at you at all.
MOM: why dont you two go play in roses room?
DAVE: whoa
DAVE: i dont think im allowed to play in girls rooms
BRO: It’s fine this time, lil man.
DAVE: but you said
BRO: Just go.
That’s the tone of voice he uses when you’re in trouble, so you decide not to push your luck this time. Rose leads you up the stairs and into a room that is… Well, it’s messier than yours is.
DAVE: mom lets you keep your room like this?
ROSE: You don’t have to call her that.
DAVE: what?
ROSE: Mom. You don’t have to call her that. She isn’t your mother.
ROSE: Her real name is Roxy.
Something about this idea makes you uncomfortable in a way that you don’t know how to explain, and you look around the room again, fighting to keep your cheeks from flushing. Your eyes land on a few abandoned toys strewn about the floor.
DAVE: yooo
DAVE: are those trolls?
ROSE: Yes.
DAVE: can i play with them?
ROSE: That’s fine.
You sit cross-legged on the floor and pick one up with bright pink hair and what you can only describe as a wizard outfit—a robe covered with stars and moons and a pointy hat to match.
It takes you a minute to realize you’re playing by yourself, and you look up at Rose with your brow furrowed.
DAVE: what are you doing?
ROSE: Waiting.
DAVE: waiting for what?
ROSE: My opportunity.
DAVE: do you have to talk like that?
DAVE: all secret-y?
DAVE: your proppor...
DAVE: opportut...
ROSE: Opportunity.
DAVE: for what?
ROSE: To sneak back out there. Duh.
DAVE: what? thats a stupid idea
DAVE: bro would catch us
ROSE: Trust me, I do this a lot.
ROSE: I’m a professional.
DAVE: youre what?
ROSE: It means I’m really good at this.
DAVE: im really good at sneaking too!
DAVE: i have training!
DAVE: watch how good i can sneak!
To demonstrate your point, you start shuffling across the floor with careful footsteps. You don’t make a sound, even though Rose’s room is like a minefield. It’s not any worse than having to sneak around Bro’s smuppets, although you’re not actually very good at that. Bro always catches you, because he’s a professional sneaker too, and a professional catcher. Rose is raising her eyebrows at you, though. You don’t know how to do that yet, so you pout just a little.
ROSE: Impressive.
DAVE: what?
ROSE: Cool.
DAVE: oh
DAVE: thanks
DAVE: everything i do is pretty cool though
ROSE: Of course.
ROSE: Well you wanna know a pretty cool thing to do?
DAVE: what?
ROSE: Sneaking out with me.
DAVE: no!
DAVE: why do you even wanna sneak out?
ROSE: To see what they’re talking about. Aren’t you curious?
You purse your lips. You are curious (which is a word you know from Alice in Wonderland), but you also know how much trouble you’ll get in if Bro catches you. You don’t want Rose to get in trouble like that—she probably couldn’t handle it, since she hasn’t had as much training as you. But it seems like she’s gonna do it no matter what, so you guess you should probably go with her to make sure she doesn’t get into too much trouble.
Rather than answering her out loud, you mime a zipper over your lips and then nod. She smiles and runs a zipper across her own lips.
You follow Rose’s lead, since she makes the good point that she knows where all of the creaky spots and stuff are in her house. You’re careful to step exactly where she’s stepped every time, and you only wind up finding a creaky spot one time, toward the top of the stairs. Rose turns around and shushes you, which is pretty embarrassing, so you focus extra hard after that.
When you get to the bottom of the stairs, Rose gestures for you to follow and then dashes behind the wizard statue. It’s so quick and so quiet that it almost reminds you of Bro’s flashstepping, which you haven’t quite perfected yet. The idea that she can do that without any training makes you a little jealous and a little nervous, and your eyes flash toward the couch, where Mom and Bro are sitting. You can’t hear them from the bottom of the stairs, and the stairs don’t even have a railing or anything, so you don’t have any cover.
You take a deep breath and bravely run to the wizard statue as fast as you can.
DAVE: now what?
ROSE: Now we listen.
DAVE: listen for what?
ROSE: Shh!
You shoosh, even though Rose is definitely not the boss of you or anything. She points toward Mom and Bro, who are much closer to the wizard statue than they were to the bottom of the stairs. If you listen closely, you can hear them talking.
BRO: So, what, they’ve got another kid in the lab?
MOM: shes not in the lab
BRO: Then where is she? And why is it my problem?
MOM: shes on an island with...
MOM: she was on an island with dr harley
BRO: What do you mean, she was? If she’s not there anymore
MOM: shes still there
You peer nervously over at Rose.
DAVE: i dunno rose
DAVE: this conversation sounds a little... grown up?
DAVE: maybe we shouldnt be listening
ROSE: If you want to turn back around, you can.
You think about it, but you really don’t want to go back by yourself, so you decide not to. You’re still nervous when you turn back to Mom and Bro, though. Whatever they’re talking about, it sounds pretty serious, and that’s the kind of stuff you get in the most trouble for listening in on if you get caught, which you always do.
BRO: Okay.
BRO: Is there a reason you’re being all secretive? It’s not like you to dance around shit.
MOM: im still trying to figure out how to say this
BRO: You flew me here before you figured out how to say whatever this is?
MOM: dr harley is dead
Your eyes go a little bit wide. Somebody died? You don’t know who Dr. Harley is because you’ve never heard the name before, but you can see the way Bro winces at the news like she’s cut him with a sword. He never winces like that (and not just because you can never cut him with your sword).
BRO: Oh.
MOM: are you ok?
BRO: Why wouldn’t I be?
BRO: You were the one who was so attached to the guy.
MOM: are you really trying to bullshit me about this right now like i dont know you better than anyone?
BRO: I’m not bullshitting.
MOM: dirk
You can’t see Bro’s face from where you are, but you can imagine the way his jaw clenches. It doesn’t do that a lot, but you’ve seen it happen every once in a while when he’s talking to Cal. He usually only does that after your bedtime.
You realize with a growing sense of unease that you have no idea where Cal is, and suddenly your heart is beating a lot faster.
BRO: Okay. Fine.
BRO: It’s a little... unsettling.
BRO: But I’m a grown ass man. I can handle unsettling.
BRO: What’s going on with this kid on the island?
MOM: right
MOM: we cant get her back off the island
BRO: What, like you can’t find it?
MOM: no, we know exactly where it is
MOM: something wont let us
BRO: Something?
MOM: i dont know what it is
MOM: we cant see it on any of our cameras
BRO: And none of your guys have made it back to tell you what it is either, huh?
MOM: not as such, no
BRO: Got it. So, what, you want me to go out there?
MOM: i was hoping you might
BRO: Why can’t you do it?
MOM: i cant leave rose here
BRO: But I can just leave Dave and that’s fine then?
MOM: i can watch him
BRO: I could watch them, too.
MOM: dirk...
BRO: What.
BRO: Why don’t you just say it.
MOM: say what?
BRO: You don’t trust me.
MOM: oh that is ridiculous
MOM: i trust you more than any living person on this earth!
BRO: But not with the kids.
MOM: i
BRO: Now you’re trying to bullshit me.
MOM: he doesnt have a car seat, dirk!
BRO: He doesn’t need one.
MOM: oh, is that a part of his training?
She says it like an insult, and you can’t help flinching, your stomach churning. You’ve never heard anybody talk to Bro like this. You’re not sure if you’re scared of Mom or for Mom.
BRO: We don’t have a car, Roxy.
BRO: And don’t try to act like you don’t know exactly what is going to happen to these damn kids.
MOM: i have no idea whats going to happen to these kids, dirk!
MOM: thats whats so terrifying about all of this
MOM: and youre a fucking idiot if you think you do
BRO: Well I know it ain’t gonna be a picnic where Mommy is gonna run in and kiss all their booboos to make it better. He needs to be prepared to handle himself. And to handle Rose too, by the sounds of it.
MOM: rose will be fine
MOM: i doubt theyve invented a problem she cant think her way out of
MOM: she gets that from you
BRO: Don’t do that. You know I hate it when you do that.
MOM: she does
BRO: I am not her father. I’m not Dave’s father. We didn’t make babies together, no matter how much the idea makes you swoon.
MOM: but they are our babies
MOM: with our genes
MOM: with your genes
BRO: Can we just... not talk about this? Not right now.
MOM: then when?
BRO: Not right now.
You know that voice, too. That’s the same voice Bro gets when he’s telling you that you can’t have ice cream for dinner, or that you have to watch a movie other than The Land Before Time. It’s not the in trouble voice, but it’s the voice that means that you’re definitely not going to change his mind.
Mom stands up and you shrink into yourself behind the wizard statue, which also means that you shrink into Rose. Mom pushes her hands up into her hair, which is something that you do when you’re upset. What does that mean?
MOM: i need a drink
BRO: Roxy.
MOM: dont
MOM: it was stupid of me to think you would even care
BRO: Of course I care.
MOM: about what? about who
MOM: its not rose
MOM: its certainly not me
BRO: I care about you.
MOM: then prove it
MOM: do one thing to help me out this one time and ill never bother you again
BRO: Roxy, I’m not saying that you bother me.
MOM: yes, you are
MOM: youre not trying to, but you are
BRO: Maybe you’re hearing that I don’t care about you, but that’s not what I’m saying.
BRO: And I’m not saying I don’t care about Rose either.
MOM: youve never even talked to her
MOM: even today, you havent talked to her
BRO: I didn’t have anything to say to her.
MOM: not once? not ever? in five whole years, you never thought of anything to say to your
BRO: Don’t.
MOM: i need a drink
MOM: are you coming with me or not?
BRO: You know I don’t do that shit.
BRO: I wish you’d quit it, too.
MOM: its the only way i can
MOM: you know what
MOM: nevermind
MOM: stay here
MOM: what do i care?
MOM: were the only ones left who know, and you cant stand me
Bro sits up like he has something to say to that, but Mom turns and walks away from him before he can. You almost expect him to get up and chase after her. That’s what a guy in a movie would do, you think. It’s not what Bro would do, though—and it’s not what Bro does do either. Instead, he turns just enough to look over his shoulder and then scoffs.
BRO: Are you two gonna stand back there all night or what?
You don’t want to think that he’s talking about you and Rose, but you’re not stupid, so you do think that. You look over at Rose, who looks surprised at being caught, like you didn’t tell her this was going to happen, and then you catch a glimpse of movement out of the corner of your eye. Cal, you realize a second too late, and you shriek and sprint over to Bro on the couch.
Bro heaves a sigh and reaches out to rest a hand on top of your head, ruffling your hair. You crinkle your nose up. You can’t remember the last time he did that.
DAVE: whats up?
BRO: Don’t act like you weren’t droppin’ eaves.
DAVE: what?
BRO: Nothin’.
BRO: Listen, lil man.
BRO: You might be here for a lil while.
DAVE: what? why?
BRO: ‘Cause you need more friends.
You stare at him for a second, blinking, and then turn back to look at Rose. She’s not hiding behind the wizard anymore—she’s holding Cal, who hangs limp from her arms. It makes your heart pound, but she smiles at you, and you realize he’s a little less scary with Rose there. Not that he’s that scary the rest of the time. You’re not a baby. Still, you check from the corner of your eye that Bro isn’t looking, and then you offer her a smile back.
DAVE: yeah
DAVE: i guess so