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Leonard was sitting at his desk while he watched Jimmy sleep on the couch. He looked so young like that. He was wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants -a thin fabric, but heat retaining- and soft wool socks, and an old ratty starfleet tee shirt that he’s pretty sure Jimmy had stolen from his dad. George said that his youngest son had a petulant for stealing his clothes.
One would think that Jimmy had planned to stay the night with him, the way that he had pulled the clothes out of his bag an hour earlier when he started yawning, and Leonard had told him, -gentle, but firm, because Jimmy was prone to arguing when tired, but would startle at a harsh voice- to change so he could sleep.
He took a sip from the small glass of whiskey he’d poured -Jimmy could slug that stuff back like no other if he was out at a bar with Bones for the night, trying to relax and actually have fun, but he insisted that the stuff was better for wound disinfectant than as a drink, Bones really didn’t want to know why he knew that- and glanced over at Jimmy’s backpack. Not many students actually carried a backpack with them, but Jimmy tended to carry one no matter what, saying that he had important things he didn’t want to be without.
Leonard was starting to think, that Jimmy’s backpack was more of a ‘everything I need to survive with no shelter for three days’ kind of backpack than a ‘carries all my books’ kind of backpack.
Leonard told himself that he really didn’t want to know why Jimmy had that kind of a backpack with him at all times. That it was none of his business, and Jimmy was probably just paranoid because of his anxiety.
Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you.
He tipped back the rest of the contents of his glass, and set it down on the desk he’d been sitting at, before getting back up to get changed into pajamas and into bed as well. He had a day off tomorrow, for the first time in a week, but so did Jimmy, and after getting some sleep, he wanted to spend it with the other man. That always made him feel better.
Hell, he feels lucky that Jimmy even sleeps around him at all, knowing what paranoia can do to a person’s sleeping habits, and hell, Jimmy locked his bedroom door in his own house. He was just glad the man was taking his sleep where he could get it.
***
When Leonard finally let himself be roused the next morning, it was still a few hours before his preferred time to get up, but not bad enough that his body demanded he go back to sleep.
Besides, he had an uninvited guest to attend to.
“Can I help you?”
Jimmy looked down at him with a quiet, secret smile, that made Leonard wonder if the boy was feeling playful today. Some days, he’d get quiet, but playful. He’d cause mischief all day long and do what Leonard would call ‘testing limits’ which mostly consisted of him wandering off when Leonard told him to stay put, or doing exactly what Leonard had asked him not to, till he got a light scolding for it.
These were usually reserved for days when Leonard had off to spend with him, when he knew that Leonard had the time for him.
“No, I’m fine.”
Bones let out an overly exaggerated sigh and reached up to pull the giggling boy into his arms, tucking him up against his chest. Him and Jim didn’t sleep in the same bed, but that’s mostly because Jim was too paranoid to sleep while touching anyone else, but Jimmy was always open to cuddles from his favorite grumpy doctor.
“Alright, be fine down here where I can use you as my pillow.”
Jimmy’s hands curled up together against Leonard’s chest, but his fingers never strayed to snap at the band on his wrist, entirely calm as he let himself settle down against him.
Leonard knew that Jimmy could never stay still while awake though. He gave them a good fifteen minutes max before Jimmy started squirming and whining that he wanted breakfast and to be let up right now, please before he would get upset.
He found, that he didn’t mind in the slightest.
When Jimmy started squirming against him, he gave a light squeeze on the hold that he had on the boys waist, making Jimmy let out a high, breathless squeak, before stilling.
“Huh, that's weird.”
Jimmy squirmed again. “What's weird?”
Leonard gave him a little grin and squeezed once more, delighting in the second squeak that followed. “I think you have mice trapped in here.”
Jimmy gasped at the tickly sensation, trying to wriggle out of Leonard's hold again, his whole stomach area heaving under the feel of fingers and a squeak coming out when squeezed. He couldn't help the noise, it was entirely involuntary.
“No, ‘s no mice, I promise!”
Leonard let out a humming noise, “Hmm, are you sure about that? It sounds like there are.”
“Yes! Yes I promise, no mice!” He nearly wore himself out, trying to wriggle out of the hold, though Leonard knew it was for show, he's seen Jim in the sparring ring with others, he could hold his own with an almost feral air to him, destroying anyone in the ring with him. Leonard had the idea that he was able to fight, for the same reason that he kept his life equipped with the ability for flight as well.
He let himself not think about that right now, focusing on the squirming man in his arms, giving a passing thought to the fact that he never thought he'd have a man squirming in his arms like this , and not think it's weird, but finally, after a valiant struggle to free himself from the clutches of tickles, Leonard let him wriggle his way out, sitting off to the side, looking cautiously at Leonard like he was afraid he might attack him again at any moment.
“I guess you're right, the rest of those didn't sound like mice squeaks.”
Jimmy gave him a suspicious look, and when he spoke, his voice was younger than Leonard had ever heard it, right hand coming up to his face so he could gnaw on the knuckle of his pointer finger. “‘S not mice, I promise. Just my belly.”
Leonard nodded soothingly. “It's a very nice belly, darlin. You wanna come back here for more cuddles?”
Jimmy nodded, slipping himself back into Leonard's arms, where he had been before getting restless. They could wait a little bit more before getting up for the day.
Finally, when Jim started squirming for the second time, this time with little interspaced whines of noise while he tried to extract himself from Bones’ arms, Bones let him up this time. “You get dressed already?”
He followed the jumpy blonde out of the bed, and headed for the fresher while listening to Jimmy’s excitable chatter behind him talking about how he’s been up a full two hours before Bones got up, and he’s already gotten breakfast and everything, and gotten dressed, and Bones, Bones! You misses so much while you sleep!
It was literally, so adorable. Leonard thinks he’s getting cavities.
Now days, age regression as a form of therapy, was actually a commonly used practice. At least, a common enough practice that a Starfleet officer -or in this case, cadet- would actually be considered professional for using all therapy tools at their disposal to make sure they stay able to cope with all situations.
Jim Kirk was, but no means, a shy man, but Jimmy could cave in on himself if he even thought people were looking at him wrong, but at the same time, if given the right circumstances, he’d thrive off of the right attention.
Call him a sentimental fool, but Leonard missed the days when Joanna had been young enough to coddle like this, and he loving giving Jimmy that attention he needed.
When Leonard got out of the fresher after a quick shower, and started to get dressed, he noticed Jimmy was already packing up his backpack again, folding his clothes from the day before and the ones he’d slept in, back into a small bundle that honestly surprised Leonard with how little room it took up in the medium sized backpack. He could see a pack of federation issued three day ration pack taking just as little room as the clothes, and it solidified the idea that Jimmy was carrying a three day survival kit at all times, and could probably make it easily stretch for longer if he had to.
“Doctor Karau suggested the backpack. That was… after I got back to Earth, that is. She suggested that if I can’t stop hoarding things, supplies, weapons, and if I couldn’t stop hiding in places, I should carry around a bag with everything I need to survive for a few days at a time if I need to.”
Just like the meeting with the eugenics conference, that raises a few more questions than it answers, but Leonard at least thinks he knows the right answer now. “After… after Tarsus?”
Jimmy paused while Leonard finished pulling on a tee shirt. “I can neither confirm, nor deny that.”
Leonard nodded. That was answer enough for him. “Well, does the backpack work?”
Jimmy nodded, picking at the rubber band on his wrist, but not snapping it. He nodded. “Yeah, it helps a bit actually. Back when I first got home, I hid in my room for a lot of the time before Mom and Dad got me a therapist who could handle my level of PTSD. Even for a survivor of… you know… it was pretty high. I was almost completely non functional. I’d only leave to get food, and if I had to leave the house, I was… violent…”
Leonard sat down on the couch next to Jimmy, watching him zip the largest section of the pack closed again. “You’re not a very violent person now. Sure, I’ve seen you fight, and you can get vicious, but I have never seen you confront a person.”
Jimmy smiled a little. “That’s what’s different now. I didn’t discover age regression as a therapy tool on my own, Doctor Karau suggested that too, she said it would put me in a mindset of back before I needed to survive. It’s like… I was completely non functional before it, and while I’ve been a bit reclusive these past few years, I doubt I’d be this well without it.”
Leonard nodded. “That’s good, Jimmy. It’s nice that you’ve found a way to help yourself.”
Jimmy turned a fetching shade of ‘why the fuck would you tell me that’ and looked away, a little embarrassed. He wasn’t sure why he was embarrassed though, it’s not like he could hide this anyways. Age regression is the number one tool in childhood trauma counseling, and he’s had some massive childhood trauma. Maybe because it’s been ten years and he’s still using it to get by. Back when he first found it, he’d spend days at a time little, clinging to his mom or dad when he had to leave the house -and his parents, so happy he’d leave with them at all, they didn’t care that it meant it was like they had a toddler again- and he’d rarely surface.
He was smart, he did all his schoolwork it a childlike state of mind, and still got top marks in classes, but it ostracized him from his peers as well.
Good. Back then, the idea of talking with any of them, made him sick to his stomach anyways.
No, he’s different than he used to be, he doesn’t cling to age regression like a lifeline anymore, but it’s still there.
No, he thinks… he’s embarrassed, because… it’s no longer a constant coping mechanism, sometimes… it’s just nice. It’s nice to be in a happy, young mindset. To be taken care of like he was something precious, in a way that he’d never let anyone otherwise.
It was just nice.
He looked back at the backpack and smiled a little. “You know, even just a few years ago, before I got here… before I met you, I never would have put pajamas in there. It would have been as stuffed full as I could get it, at least two three day ration packs, plus those gross ration bars they sell for .25 credits at the store, anything I could fit in there, would be in. I was too damn nervous to ever even think about putting in pajamas so I could sleep comfortably.”
“That’s good, Jimmy, that means you’ve stopped thinking about what can go wrong, and started thinking about what can go right.”
Jimmy flushed a little again, nudging his forehead against Leonard’s shoulder with a sweet little noise of embarrassment. “Let’s go get breakfast. You know I never say know to second breakfast.”
“Alright.”
***
The park they ended up at, was big and green, off to the side of the campus and had big sprawling jungle gyms, and enough room for an adult to play as well as the kids. Leonard let his boy go play with the kids as he went to go sit at an unoccupied bench, a few feet away from a pair of chatting mothers. He kept an eye out for anyone that might look as if they didn’t like Jimmy playing with the children -there seemed to always be one, even now days that age regression is such a common practice- and pulled out a PADD so he could go through some personal files.
“This world continues to surprise me, even after having lived on it for seven years.”
Leonard looked up from his PADD, and found the vulcan standing there, and raised an eyebrow at him. “Surprises you?” He looked out at the playground and found that the professor was staring at Jimmy. Not unkindly, but intense. “Ahh. Jimmy, then?”
The vulcan made a noise of assessment. Leonard noted that he was holding a satchel and a go cup of what was probably tea. He realized -with some surprise of his own- that Spock had been on his way back to campus, and legitimately gotten distracted by them to the point where he came over to ask questions. “He does not act as his age dictates. I can only assume that he engages in what terrans refer to as ‘age regression therapy’ as a tool of childhood recreation.”
Leonard gave him the smallest nod, knowing that while he wasn’t looking at him, vulcans can process so much more than humans, even out of the corner of their eyes. “He does. I assume, after the conference in front of the third years, you can surmise why.”
“Affirmative.”
“I guess this isn’t a therapy tool that they use on Vulcan.”
“It was entirely unheard of until Vulcan first made contact with Earth. It is a practice that vulcan’s do not follow.”
Before Leonard could reply again, he found himself run into, and if he’d been standing up, he’d be on the ground now. He sighed, looking down to find Jimmy trying to worm his way into Leonard’s lap, looking at Spock curiously for a moment before reaching for his backpack, and opening one of the pockets without ever taking his eyes off of the professor. He pulled out a water bottle and took a drink from it before curling back against Leonard’s chest, sprawled halfway off the doctor’s legs. “Hi.”
“Salutations.”
Jimmy and Spock seemed to observe each other closely for a few minutes, entirely fascinated with each, while Leonard gave them both a funny look.
Finally, Jimmy seemed to nod to himself a little, and turned to look at Leonard. “Professor Spock is nice, Bones. He’s awesome, can he come with us to the museum?”
Leonard looked back up at Spock, an eyebrow raised in question. The vulcan looked a little embarrassed actually, and he actually looked a little green in the cheeks. It was so interesting.
“My presence at Starfleet at this moment, is unneeded.”
Leonard had the oddest feeling that Jimmy had just wormed his way into someone else's’ heart, just like he’d done his.
Oh great. Now he has to make friends too. “Alright.”
And thus, became the oddest friendship ever.