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What was the worst possible thing that could happen while Keigo was infiltrating the League of Villains?
If you'd asked him that when he started, he would've answered that being killed would probably be the worst thing. The League finding out that he was a spy and putting him to death for it before he could find a way to escape. Or the other heroes finding out about him being with the League, but not knowing that it was a spy mission and killing him before he had a chance to explain. Or failing and being put to death by the Commission.
Yes, he'd thought the worst thing that could happen to him was death. How stupidly naive he'd been.
Something worse had happened, when he met the League. For the first time in... in... in memory, he'd felt safe. His mask had begun to slip. He allowed himself to be Keigo and not Hawks.
There was a shining, glimering feeling in his chest whenever he was able to slip away. The information he passed back to the Commission grew to be less and less of what he knew, and then became fake altogether. He was trying to find a way out, a way to join the League for real, because with them, he felt as though he could just be.
And he wanted that. Gods, he wanted that. More than he could put into words.
He wanted Jin's bad but endearing jokes, Atsuhiro's magic tricks and cunning, Shuichi's unending optimism and idealism, Magne's steady heart, Himiko's bright and lively cheer, all more than he could say. He envied Shirakumo the younger for his sureity that his actions were righteous, and admired Shirakumo the elder for his ever-level head.
All of the League, they were the family that he wanted, the friends he wanted. Their dynamic as a whole made him ache with a jealousy that could not be matched.
But for Touya, it was even worse.
For Touya, who changed Keigo's life and gave him a chance. For Touya, who made Keigo realize that the 'Greater Good' he'd always been told everything was for might not be so good after all. For Touya, with his fire glinting off his staples in a way that never failed to draw Keigo's eye. For Touya, who had made Keigo rethink his whole life.
In retrospect, he should have expected it. The flowers. But he didn't.
He didn't expect them at all, not until they were tumbling out his mouth one morning, as he was about to leave to meet with the Commission.
Shit.
~~~
Keigo isn't stupid. He knows that he has to keep his flowers hidden. He can't say anything. Obviously not - his owners employers won't let him quit until he dies, and Touya is Dabi, the League's best at-range fighter. It's doomed from the start. Worse, the very existence of the flowers would cause the Commission to -
That didn't bear thinking about.
How long had he been standing here? The blood on his chin was dry. Was blood supposed to dry that fast?
Oh no. Oh no.
He'd been standing there for more than thirty minutes, just staring in the mirror. He was late, he was so very late, he'd be lucky to get out without punishment -
So why bother?
Why go? Why does it matter?
He burst out laughing. Maybe these flowers were a blessing, really. Maybe they were a sign for him to stop living in that god-awful limbo that had consumed him. He began to cough, choking on the flowers that swiftly spilled over from his mouth.
He didn't even bother to wipe the blood away.
He turned his phone off and dropped it into the trash can. No more, no more, no more. He'd just been given an expiration date, and he didn't intend to spend his last days answering to the whims of people who saw him as an investment at best, if they thought of him at all. He would either be punished for developing feelings, or he would manage to hide it and die.
No. No. No. Even if these were his last days, he was going home.
~~~
The League were as happy to see him as ever, even if his smile was slightly wobbly and his complexion somewhat more pale than it should be. Why wouldn't they be? They had no reason to think that anything was different -
"Kei-kun, you smell like blood," Himiko said bluntly, "Why do you smell like blood? Are you bleeding?"
Keigo blinked at her for a moment. "Uh..."
"That shouldn't be that difficult of a question to answer," Magne cocked an eyebrow, "Something's up. What's going on?"
"I..." Keigo shook his head a moment, then smiled. "It's nothing. You don't need to worry about it, really." He turned to address Shirakumo the elder. "Do you mind if I stay here the next few days, Shirakumo-san?"
Shirakumo Oboro looked nothing but confused. "Sure? There's room for you here, but I'm surprised that you want to? You've never stayed the night before. Are you sure that everything's alright?"
"Never better!" Keigo smiled, bright and fake, swallowing back the flowers that threatened to burst up and out. "I just managed to find some time that I won't be missed by the Commission, is all."
Tenko's brow furrowed oddly, but said nothing, letting his father continue the conversation still. "Al...right... The third room on the left on the second floor is open. You can stay there."
"Thanks, Shirakumo-san!" Keigo gave a jaunty little salute, with a smile that didn't quite meet his eyes, before heading upstairs to claim his bed.
While there was nowhere he'd rather be than here, he did wish that they would stop staring.
~~~
"Something's up with the bird," Touya scowled, his arms folded across his chest. Keigo hadn't been out of the room for more than a minute, but this was somewhat disturbing. "Tell me that you caught that too."
"Oh absolutely," Oboro nodded, "He found time where the Commission won't miss him? Given all that we've pilfered from their files, I don't think that such a time exists. If nothing else, he's here against orders."
"He smells like blood," Himiko said, popping up close to the bar, "Either he hurt someone else recently or he's been bleeding recently. I feel like it's probably the latter. He wouldn't dodge the question so hard if it was someone else, especially not around us."
"Whatever's going on, we'll just have to try and deal with it as it comes," Tenko huffed, "He's one of us, and if he's staying the night, I think that he's finally starting to understand that."
"Still, it worries me..." Touya looked towards the stairs, a strange, tight feeling in his chest, "Something's up with the bird, and I'm going to figure out what."