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Steve had always wondered what kind of situation he would be in when his soulmate asked him the question.
You don’t happen to have a knife on you, do you?
His fantasies were anywhere between simple innocence to completely dangerous. Either way, he always made sure to keep one on his person. Because who knows? He’d rather be a help than a hindrance.
There was a period of time when he thought that soulmates didn’t matter. Peggy and he had clicked and she was one hell of a woman. But it wasn’t the same. There was a strange emptiness between them. It almost felt like cheating in a way. It wasn’t fair to deny his soulmate the chance. That, however, didn’t make Steve feel any less for Peggy. It was just a different animal.
After waking up this side of the century Steve was sure he wasn’t going to meet his soulmate at all. Here he was, man out of time, and his soulmate at best would be barely clinging to life. It felt like some sort of huge cosmic joke. He could be the hero a nation needed but he’d be alone.
Maybe that was for the best.
What was there to Steve Rogers anyway? He was a man who was always under contract. His name carried weight and with that weight came responsibility. Steve didn’t think he could, in good conscience, pull someone into the mess that was his life.
And then he met Tony Stark and everything went tits up.
Here was his friend’s son, a veritable genius with a smart mouth and gorgeous, expressive eyes. Steve tried so very hard to not act on it all but when he was asked the question that was etched on his skin it took all he had to keep his mouth shut.
Steve tried to reason with himself’ firstly that it was wrong. Howard was a good man and they’d been friends. Steve was both older than Tony and younger and he couldn’t decide which was worse. On top of it all: Steve was scared. Tony was an amazing person who had, in the time Steve was in the ice, managed to take over Howard’s company, turn it away from arms dealing, and build it into something good. Tony was such a great, compassionate person and Steve wasn’t sure he deserved something like that.
So he never said a word.
After a bit Steve figured it was for the best. He and Tony disagreed on mostly everything it seemed and Tony was a bit too selfish. At least that’s what Steve saw. But as time went on Steve realized that it wasn’t selfishness so much as it was his way of protecting himself.
Tony was getting more and more cautious around Steve anymore because Steve still had managed to not say a word to Tony. The whole team, rag-tag as it was, had begun to notice, too.
Then it happened. Steve spoke to Tony almost completely by accident. Bumping into him on his way to a debrief.
“Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind.”
Tony stopped then, still as a statue, and met Steve’s eyes with a cold stare. They stayed that way for a while. Just looking at one another. And with each passing second Tony grew to be angrier and angrier. Steve could see it and what pained him the most is seeing that fury barely cover the hurt.
“You have ‘a lot on your mind’?” Tony quoted, hissing through his teeth. “Is that the reason you’ve been avoiding me? You didn’t want to be caught up in the hot mess that is Tony Stark?”
“Tony-“
Tony cuts him off with a wave of his hand, “Do you know what those words did to me when I was younger? Between you and my father,” Tony spits, “I felt like nothing I ever did would be good enough.”
“That’s not what I meant.” Steve tries, desperate to ease Tony’s pain. “I didn’t mean for those words to be my first to you.”
“It’s been weeks, Rogers.” Tony looks close to tears. “Weeks. You decided that you were the only one who deserved to know?”
“I needed time to think.” Steve steps closer. “I never wanted to drag my soulmate into my life. I’m not stable, Tony. I’m a mess. My soulmate deserves better. You deserve better.”
Tony laughs humorlessly and sighs, “You don’t get to decide that. You don’t get to make the decision for both of us. I deserve to have a choice.”
“What’s your choice, then?” Steve asks, moving his arms to cross his chest, desperately trying to keep himself from just reaching out and touching Tony.
Tony’s face softens and he smiles a little, genuine, “I want to spend time with you. I want to get to know you as a person – not as Captain America but as Steve Rogers. You’re my soulmate, Steve. There has to be a reason we’re meant to be together.”
“You deserve better than me.” Steve whispers. “You’re so much better than me.”
Tony shrugs, “From where I’m standing you’re just fine. Steve, you’re who I’m meant to be with. We’re equals.”
Steve sighs and rubs a hand over his face, “I should have said something.”
“Damn right, you should have.” Tony admonishes. “But I understand why you didn’t.”
“I should have come up with something better to say to you. Something that would have gotten you through good times and bad.”
Tony shrugs, “Life happens, Steve. I’ve got you now. That’s all that matters.”
Steve’s eyes roam over Tony’s face, taking in every detail. He sees every freckle and every scar, he spends what feels like hours looking into Tony’s dark, expressive eyes. This is his soulmate. This is the man he’ll spend the rest of his life with. Steve knows that now. Tony is it for him.
“You’re prefect.” Steve blurts.
Tony laughs, deep and genuine, “People would argue that point but thank you.”
“I’m sorry.”
Tony smiles, “How about making it up to me?”