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Steve and Tony had been fighting for the better part of a week. Or rather, they had a fight an were no longer speaking to one another.
Tony had refused to come up to their room, opting instead to sleep on the couch in his workshop, while Steve stayed awake every night in their bed. He was losing sleep and it was effecting his work. He couldn’t focus anymore. He couldn’t even pull together the energy to workout, each punch to the bag felt like it took years off his life.
Steve could admit that this time it had been his fault. He’d crossed a line and said some things that he isn’t proud of.
“You’re a selfish, inconsiderate person, Tony.” Steve hissed.
Tony looked helpless, trying his best to explain, “I ran the numbers. I had a chance and I took it. Don’t stand there and tell me you wouldn’t do the same.”
“As a part of this team you follow my orders,” Steve raised his voice and tried to ignore the way Tony flinched, “and that means you do so no matter what your numbers tell you.”
“Maybe I don’t want to be a part of this team,” Tony practically whispers. “If you’re willing to risk lives by sticking to a plan.”
“You don’t mean that.” Steve croaks, surprised.
Tony straightens and moves to walk out, “Watch me. I don’t have to be a part of your team to save people.”
“Tony-“ Steve starts, wrecked, as he reaches out to Tony.
“In fact,” Tony says just before the elevator doors close, “I don’t need you at all.”
It had sounded so final. Steve had been worried that Tony would quit. Fortunately, Tony knew well enough that the team would be better with him on it. If Tony left, the team would fracture. Contrary to what Steve had said, Tony was, in fact, a selfless and considerate person.
Steve tried for days to talk to Tony. He didn’t have much luck. His permission to enter the lab had been revoked.
He just wanted to say that he was sorry. The problem was that Steve cared a whole heck of a lot about what happened to Tony. Steve cares about his team. But, more than that Steve loves Tony. Their love was new, Steve could feel it blooming like a flower does to greet the sun and he was terrified that he’d stomped it out with a few careless words.
Jarvis, who had originally refused to speak with Steve at all, was now willing to at least tell Steve that Tony was eating and sleeping. Steve even took to preparing some of Tony’s favorite meals and handing them off to Tony’s PA.
He was still locked out.
So he did the best he could do. He sent Tony’s favorite blanket in. Steve did his best to pick out Tony’s outfits based on comfortability. He even went so far as to start writing letters. They were always small and to the point.
-
Tony,
I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you those things. You’re right. Sometimes you have to change the play in the middle of the battle. I was scared.
Love,
Steve
-
Tony,
I can’t sleep without you. I’ve gotten used to having you here. The team is nothing without you. I’m nothing without you.
Love,
Steve
-
Tony,
I will do whatever you need me to if it means you coming out of the workshop. You need sleep in a real bed. I’ll leave, if you want. I can stay in my old room.
Think about it. That couch must be putting cricks in your neck and hurting your back.
Love,
Steve
-
Steve was in the middle of making some potato soup – one of Tony’s favorites – when he heard the elevator to the penthouse open. He stopped chopping potatoes, carefully sat down the knife, and turned.
Standing there, looking completely ruffled and in need of some decent sleep, was Tony.
Steve had to fight the urge to walk up to him and pull him into his arms. So they stood and stared, waiting for the other person to say something. Anything.
“I don’t want to fight.” Tony says first, looking close to tears.
Steve deflates and takes a step forward, “Ok, Tony. No fighting.”
“Promise?” Tony asks, coming to stand in front of Steve.
Steve wraps his arms around Tony and brings him tightly to his chest. He exhales a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and kisses the top of Tony’s head. It feels so good to have Tony in his arms again.
“Promise.”
Tony hugs him back just as fiercely, “What happened? I don’t understand why you exploded like that. Why were you scared?”
“I can’t lose you, Tony.” Steve sighs and rubs Tony’s back. “I saw you go into that burning building, I knew it was seconds away from collapsing, and the thought of losing you was too much.”
“We have to save people,” Tony interjects, “that’s our job.”
Steve squeezes him once and then releases him enough to look down into his eyes, “I know. That won’t make it any easier, though.”
Tony nods, “If it was you I would be scared, too.”
Steve presses a kiss to Tony’s forehead and returns to cubing potatoes. Tony sidles up next to him and starts chopping onions. It’s so painfully domestic and Steve is so thankful that Tony’s decided to forgive him that there are legitimate tears forming in his eyes.
“Why did you decide to come back?”
Tony keeps on chopping and says, without a beat, “Because I love you.”
Steve coughs out a laugh and smiles, “I love you, too.”
“Let’s get this soup going and cuddle on the couch. I’ve been dying to have a scary movie night.” Tony says, bumping his hip into Steve’s.
“There’s a new one on called ‘Hush’ that looks good.”
Tony laughs, “You’re still an ass.”
“And you’re still reckless.”
“You win some, you lose some.”