Chapter Text
"See, this is where I'm having a problem here. We're talking about vampires. Like Dracula, only uglier."
Jesse was agitated. He was standing around in the library, which was a bad start in and of itself. It usually meant that a major Act of Willow had occurred and Jesse was being forced to learn for himself. This time he, Willow, the new girl Buffy and the creepy librarian guy had a whole different disaster on their hands.
It had all started the previous night. Jesse, Xander, and Willow had been at the Bronze, trying to do what all horny teenagers do: get a date. Amazingly, after Cordelia had somehow resisted his charms yet again, Jesse had scored. Darla had been beautiful, smart and interested in him. She seemed to have this thing about graveyards being romantic, and her voice promised great things if Jesse went with her. As long as it involved making out, Jesse had no problem in humouring her.
Things had become a little hazy after she gave him a big hickey, the sort that left him bleeding. Jesse vaguely remembered Darla dragging him to a crypt where Willow was being stalked by another guy, then Buffy turned up and committed all kinds of mayhem while Xander dragged them out of the crypt. They hadn't even got out of the cemetery before more vampires attacked them, leaving Jesse too dazed to work out which way was up never mind what was going on. By the time Buffy rescued them again, Xander had been dragged away.
"Wasn't that what we saw last night?" asked Willow.
"Oh no," Buffy said, holding an ice pack to her forearm, "those weren't vampires, just guys in thorough need of a facial. Or maybe they had rabies, it could have been rabies. That guy turning to dust? Just a trick of the light." She gave Jesse a sad look. "That's exactly what I said the first time I saw a vampire. Well, after I was done screaming."
Jesse grimaced. He might have perfected the art of denial when it came to girls and school work, but even he had his limits. On another occasion he might have been able to persuade himself that he hadn't gotten up close and personal with people with fangs and deformed faces. This time his best bud was missing and his other best friend was in shock, and denying what he'd seen could cost him both of them.
"I think I need to sit down," Willow said in a small voice.
"You are sitting down," Buffy pointed out.
"Oh, good for me."
Jesse hunkered down in front of his childhood friend. "It's OK, Wills," he said gently. "We'll find him. It'll be OK."
Jesse, Willow and Xander had been friends since kindergarten. Jesse could still remember the look on his parents' faces when he told them they'd been playing with Willow's Barbie doll. He'd been allowed to take GI Joe with him the next day. Since then, they'd done everything together, and Jesse felt like he knew Xander and Willow as well as he'd ever know anyone.
He knew that Willow had a crush on Xander, for example. It showed in the way she always sat near him even if it meant being away from Jesse, how she gave all her attention to what he said, how he was the one she nagged about not turning in homework. It hurt Jesse a little, watching her grow away from him. It was all right because she was growing towards the oblivious Xander, but it still hurt.
This had to be hard on Willow, losing Xander so suddenly. She was probably beating herself up right now, Jesse thought, telling herself that if only she'd clued Xander in he'd be here right now. It hurt Jesse even more that she would think like that, but he didn't know how to stop her. "It'll be OK," he repeated helplessly.
Mr Giles sniffed. "Much as I hate to contradict you," the librarian said stuffily, "the creatures who took your friend are pure evil. We should prepare for the worst."
Willow burst into tears. Jesse gathered her into his arms and glared at the librarian. The truth — that Xander was probably already dead — was the last thing that Willow needed to hear right then. "Way to be caring and sensitive," he snarled as he rocked his sobbing burden.
"Welcome to reality," Giles fired back, imperturbable.
Unaccountably failing to spontaneously combust under Jesse's continued glare, Giles launched into a recitation of the Time-Life History of Demons, Vampires, and Things That Go Munch In The Night. Jesse listened with one ear, concentrating on soothing Willow. He owed it to both her and Xander to make sure she got through this.
Finally, after repeated sarcasm from Buffy, Giles boiled it all down to three simple sentences. "The Slayer hunts vampires. Buffy is a Slayer. Don't tell anyone. There, I think that's all the vampire information you need."
"Except for one thing," Jesse said. "How do you kill them?"
"You don't," Buffy said firmly. "I do."
"Yeah, but Xander is—"
"Xander is my responsibility, I let him get taken."
Jesse couldn't exactly contradict her, having been semi-conscious at the time, so he settled for glowering at her instead.
"If you hadn't shown up," Willow pointed out, "we would have been taken too. Does anybody mind if I pass out?" she asked weakly.
"Breathe," supplied Buffy helpfully.
"Breathe," Willow echoed faintly.
"I mind," Jesse said softly. "Stay with us, Wills." His friend of many years gave him a shaky smile as he squeezed her hand. She'd be OK. She had to be OK. Jesse didn't know what he'd do without both of his best friends.
Buffy stepped over to Giles, abruptly more business-like as if she'd never had her recent near-undeath experience. "This big guy, Luke, he talked about an offering to the Master. Now I don't know what or who, but if they weren't just feeding then Xander may still be alive. I'm gonna find him."
"Alive?" Willow asked in a small voice.
"Yeah, alive," Jesse told her, trying to keep his own doubts hidden. "We'll find him, Wills."
After Willow's suggestion of calling the police was vetoed, with even Jesse agreeing that sending men with guns after men with fangs was not of the good, Giles returned to their basic problem. "You have no idea where they took Xander?" "I looked around," Buffy replied, "but as soon as they got clear of the graveyard they could have just 'voom'."
"They can fly?" Jesse asked.
"They can drive."
"I don't remember hearing a car," Willow said.
"Let's take an enormous intuitive leap, shall we," Giles said in his frustratingly superior manner, "and say they went underground."
"There's an electrical tunnel that runs under the whole town," Jesse offered.
"If we had a map of the tunnel system, it might indicate a meeting place," Giles said wearily. "I suppose we could go to the Building Commission."
"We so don't have time," Buffy protested.
"Uh, guys," Willow said quietly. "There may be another way."
Once she was seated in front of the computer, Willow seemed to come alive again. This was a good sign, Jesse reckoned. Wills had something she could do, something to keep her occupied until they got Xander back. She would cope now. Of course, this left Jesse with nothing to do himself, so he stood and worried until Willow gave a little cry of triumph.
"There it is," Buffy said.
"That runs under the graveyard," Willow added.
"I don't see any access, though." Jesse hated to bring Willow down, but there was no getting away from the reality of the map.
"So, all the city plans are just open to the public?" Giles' question sounded a little too innocent, which sent Willow back into her shell.
"Uh, well, kinda," she said. "I sorta stumbled onto them, when I accidentally decrypted the city council's security system."
"Ah." Giles pointedly looked away, clearly not wanting to have heard that he had just been party to a not entirely legal act. Willow's ears turn positively pink in embarrassment at the Watcher's attitude. Normally, Jesse would have ragged her for general naughtiness and un-Willowly behaviour, but for once he was too focused on the information she'd found to care.
"There's nothing here," Buffy said in frustration. "This is useless!"
"Don't you think you're being a bit hard on yourself?" Giles asked.
"You're the one that told me I wasn't prepared enough," she shot back. "Understatement! I thought I was on top of everything, and then that monster Luke came out of nowhere..." She trailed off, remembering exactly what had happened. "He didn't come out of nowhere. He came from behind me. I was facing the entrance, he came from behind me and he didn't follow me out. The access to the tunnels is in the mausoleum. The girl must have doubled back with Xander after I got out. God, I am so mentally challenged."
"OK, that's where they are. So when are we going to get Xan back?"
Buffy gave Jesse a determined but sympathetic look. "There is no 'we', Jesse," she said. "I'm the Slayer, and you're not."
"Xander's my friend. I'm coming too." Jesse's tone was uncompromising, but Buffy stood her ground.
"Jesse, I can't protect both you and Xander. I'll find him for you, you'll just have to trust me on this."
"But..." Jesse's protest faded out under Buffy's steady gaze. "Great. So I'm useless, is that what you're saying?"
"No, you're not useless, it's just...." Buffy looked helplessly at Giles, who had developed a sudden fascination with the cleanliness of his glasses. "Look, I've been slaying vampires for, um, a long time. Up until just now you didn't even believe in them. The best thing you can do is...." Her eyes lit up as a halfway decent excuse suggested itself. "Is to make sure I have somewhere safe to bring Xander back to."
Jesse looked unimpressed, but before he could say any more, Willow broke in. "Buffy, I'm not anxious to go into a dark place full of monsters, but I do want to help. I need to."
"Then help me," Giles said, studying the computer screen again. "I've been researching this Harvest affair. It seems to be some sort of preordained massacre, rivers of blood, hell on earth, quite charmless. I'm a bit fuzzy however on the details. It may be that you can wrest some information from that dread machine." He looked up at three identical bemused expressions. "That was a bit, er, British, wasn't it?"
*****
"Hey, chill out, it's me," he said hurriedly.
"Jesse!" Buffy didn't quite shout his name; evidently her guilt at nearly staking him was outweighed by her anger at him disobeying her. "What are you doing here?"
"Helping you find Xander."
"You were supposed to stay at school!"
"Yeah, well, I didn't exactly agree to that." Jesse's tone was unapologetic as he stood up to the Slayer. "Look Buffy, I've known Xander since we were about five. I have to come after him, he'd do the same for me."
Buffy scowled at him, but he held her gaze steadily, and it was she who looked down first. "Oh well, I guess you're here now," she said, and turned away. "Just stay back and keep alert."
Jesse mumbled agreement and followed her through the tunnel. After a few moments he asked, "So, let me just check this. Crosses, stakes, garlic, these are all of the good, yes?"
"Yep." Buffy paused a moment to rummage through her shoulder bag. "Here, take this."
Jesse looked at the large cross she held out, then pulled one of his own from the waistband of his jeans. "I told Father Jeremy we had a school play. I'm some way short of pointy-sticksville, though."
"Leave the slaying to me, you keep back and protect Xander when we find him."
"Uh, OK." Jesse didn't really like leaving all the manly fighting stuff to a girl, but Buffy had already demonstrated that she was way better than him. Still, he had the self-respect of the entire male population of Sunnydale to consider. "So what else works?"
"Oh, the usual stuff. Fire, sunlight, holy water, beheading..."
"You've beheaded someone?"
"Oh yeah. There was a time I was pinned down by this guy who played left tackle for varsity, well he used to before he was a vampire. Anyway he had this really, really thick neck and all I had was this little bitty X-acto knife.... You're not loving this story."
Jesse cringed. He was grateful that Buffy couldn't see just how green he had gone in the dim light. "Uh, not exactly. I kinda appreciate the thought, and if we were sitting on a couch making up scary movies I'd love it, but here and now if you keep going I may hurl." He stepped forward onto something that squished, and discovered that it was possible to go more pale. "Do I want to know what that was?" he asked in a slightly sick voice.
Buffy looked over. "Oh, gross!" she said.
"I knew I should have brought a torch," Jesse muttered as he surreptitiously wiped his foot on the concrete.
They continued in silence for a while until Buffy announced, "We're close."
"How can you tell?"
"No more rats."
There was a pause, then Jesse asked in a rather pained voice, "Could we do that again, only this time you give me a comforting answer like 'My spider-sense is tingling?'"
Buffy looked at him. "You find that comforting?"
"Compared to the rodent alarm service, that's a yes."
Buffy looked at him, then her attention was grabbed by a huddled mass ahead of them. Jesse followed her gaze. "Xander," he whispered, then rushed forward to his friend. Xander tried to get away, not seeming to realise that they weren't a threat, but was brought up short by the chain fixed to his ankle.
"Woah, woah," Jesse cried as Buffy approached more cautiously, "it's us, Xan. Are you OK?"
Xander grasped his old buddy like a lifeline, eyes crazed and panting in fear. "No, I am not OK. On a scale of one to ten, I have minus several million OK-ness. Jesse, they're vampires!"
"That's fine, Buffy's a superhero."
"The whole Slayer thing, I know, I was in the library. But Jesse-man, vampires! It's crazy."
Buffy wasted no time snapping the manacle off Xander's leg. Jesse kept his eyes firmly on Xander, trying to reassure the panicked teenager. "Do you think anyone heard that?" he asked as the manacle clattered to the ground.
Jesse's question was answered by a low growl and a shadow moving at the end of the cross-tunnel. Something had heard them, something vampiric he'd bet. The three of them needed no further prompting to turn and run.
"They knew you were gonna come," Xander panted. "They said that I was the bait."
"Great, now you tell us," Jesse muttered.
"Hey, it's not like I could send you a postcard."
"Knock it off, guys." Buffy turned back down the way they had come in and stopped dead. "Oops," she said to the vampires ahead of her.
"Not good, not good," Xander chanted to himself in tones of rising panic.
"Do you know another way out?" Buffy asked him urgently.
"I dunno... maybe this way."
They ran. There was nothing else to do.
"They're toying with us," Buffy muttered, eyes hard. "They could catch us any time, they're faster than we are. They're just playing, herding us..."
"...into a dead end," Jesse finished in dismay as they burst into a tiny room.
"I don't think this is the way out," Buffy told Xander, scanning the room quickly for any exits.
"We can't fight our way back through those things," Jesse said. "What do we do?"
"I've got an idea," said Xander. "You can die."
Jesse whipped around in confusion, and was confronted with the fangs and ridges of a vampire overlaid on his friend's face. "X-Xander?" he asked, not wanting to believe his eyes. "God, Xander, I'm sorry."
"Sorry?" Xander seemed almost insulted. "I feel good now, Jess, I'm strong. I can do things I only dreamed of before. I can even hear your heartbeat."
"But not your own." Jesse's voice was ragged with the pain of seeing his old friend so changed, so... dead. Buffy took the opportunity of Xander's distraction to start trying to force the heavy steel door of the room closed.
"I serve the Master now," Xander continued fervently, "because I choose to. Because what's coming will be worth the inconvenience. If that means you die, well, at least I get to feed."
"Jesse!" Buffy cried as Xander began to lunge at his former friend. "Cross!"
Jesse raised his cross, horror written on his face as Xander flinched away. "Xander, we're buds, remember?"
Xander sneered. "You're so far below me now it's not funny. Still, if it'll make you happy I can turn you and then we can be buds again."
"No," Jesse whispered, "not like that." His hands shook, and that was all the opening Xander needed to knock the cross aside. Before he could do more than shake up Jesse, Buffy grabbed him and threw him onto the oncoming vampires, knocking them all down.
"Help me," she shouted to Jesse, and together they pushed the door shut on the advancing horde. The vampires immediately began pounding on the steel barrier, slowly tearing it apart. "Now, how do we get out of here?"
Jesse pointed up at the overhead vent. "Could we get up there?" he asked. Buffy moved quickly, knocking the grille out of the way and moving aside so that her lanky friend could haul himself up. She followed, as their pursuers twisted the solid steel door aside to break into the room. Then they scrambled for dear life in the darkness, blindly seeking ways back up to the surface, the vampires hot on their heels. They nearly didn't make it; if the access cover in the power station hadn't been illuminated by the afternoon sun....
*****
"Yeah," Jesse said flatly as he walked past her.
Not being stupid, Willow picked up on his mood. "W-was he dead?" she asked timidly.
"Worse," said Buffy. She sat down beside her the other girl and squeezed her hand sympathetically. "I'm sorry, Willow. We were too late. They were waiting for us."
"Xander," Willow whispered, her lip trembling. For a moment it looked like she was going to burst into tears again, but she pulled herself together. "At least you two are all right," she said, trying to find what little good there was in the situation.
Across the room, Jesse kicked a trash can hard, startling the girls. "Vampires suck," he announced. "I just want to be totally clear on this point. Vampires suck big time."
Buffy sighed. "So, Giles, have you found a way to make this day any worse?"
The Watcher seemed almost too embarrassed to reply. "How about the end of the world?" he offered.
"I knew we could count on you," Jesse muttered darkly.
Businesslike again, Giles filled them in on the Master, the Hellmouth, and the Harvest, using words and images that made Jesse's head spin. He tried to focus his anger, to see what he had to do to stop this Master's plans. He owed it to Xander, to the Xander he remembered. The Master had caused Xander's death, and he was going to pay. In spades.
"The minion will bear this symbol," Giles finished, drawing a three-pointed star on the whiteboard.
"So," Buffy mused, "I dust anyone sporting that symbol and no Harvest."
Giles considered this for a moment. "Simply put, yes."
Jesse grinned. It was all so straightforward; kill one vampire, and the Master's unlife sucks dead bunnies for another century. Jesse wasn't so stupid as to try to put the stake in himself, that was Buffy's job, but he was going to do everything he could to make sure that happened.
"Any idea where this little get-together is being held?" Buffy asked.
"There are a number of possibilities," Giles began.
Jesse interrupted him. "The Bronze," he said firmly.
Everyone looked at him. "Are you sure?" Willow asked uncertainly.
"It's where all the tasty young munchies are," he replied. "Besides, it's where Xander's going to be, trust me."
"We should go then," said Giles, suiting actions to words. "The sun will be down before long."
*****
"Can't you break it down?" Jesse asked impatiently.
"No, not that thing." Buffy thought furiously. "Look, you guys try the back entrance, I'll... find my own way in."
"Come on." Jesse hurried away, only to be stopped by Buffy's frantic cry.
"Wait! Guys, get the exit cleared and the people out, that's all. Don't go wild bunch on me."
They hesitated a moment before Giles said, "See you inside, then."
Jesse smiled to himself as they hurried round the building. He hadn't actually promised anything, not as such. Xander was still uppermost in his mind; his former friend would be in the Bronze, and in Jesse's mind it had become his job to stop the vampire. If he got to dust any other bad guys, so much the better. If he failed... well, at least he'd tried.
Unfortunately for them, the back door was as securely locked as the front. "Damn," Jesse said in frustration. "We've got to get in before Xander does something stupider than usual."
"You listen to me," Giles said angrily. "Xander is dead. You have to remember that when you see him, you're not looking at your friend, you're looking at the thing that killed him."
"I... yeah... I know, it's just...." Jesse didn't really know what to say, so he was grateful when Giles let him off the hook.
"Well don't just stand there," the older man said with some asperity. "Help me use one of these barrels as a battering ram."
It took them a while to force the door, and it was far from quiet, but they attracted no further vampiric attention, perhaps because Buffy was already in action herself. Jesse was the first in, not even pausing in the backstage area long enough to make sure it was clear. Giles and Willow could do that; he had to start people coming their way.
A little later, after Buffy had handily decapitated the vampires that his cross could only keep back, Jesse came across a sight that filled him with horror. There was Cordelia — his Cordy — forced down on the ground with Xander leaning over her, ready to take a bite.
"Xan-man," he cried, pulling out a stake. "Don't make me do this." All of his previous intentions melted away in the face of his former friend; he just couldn't stake Xander, he had to try to get him back.
Xander looked round, a brilliant smile on his inhuman face. "Buddy!" he said, putting so much sarcasm into the word that Jesse flinched.
"Xan, I know... please tell me there's some part of you still in there."
Xander straightened, letting Cordelia go. "I could tell you that," he sneered, "but you know, you're not worth the trouble." Jesse looked at him helplessly, holding his stake up to Xander's breast. "Let's get something straight here," the vampire continued. "Xander was a loser who couldn't even get up the courage to ask a girl out, never mind anything else. I danced with Cordelia tonight. I'd have gone further, but we got a little distracted here. You are still a loser. You're standing here, stake at my heart, and you haven't even got the guts to—"
Jesse never would hear what he hadn't got the guts to do. He pushed his stake forwards as one of the fleeing clubbers barged into Xander from behind, and after a moment's wide-eyed pain the vampire crumbled into dust.
"Oh God, Xan," he whispered, sinking to his knees. "You had to go and mention Cordy, didn't you?"
*****
"'S right, buddy," Xander called from where he lounged against the pool table. "I'm dead, so this has gotta be a dream." Vampire fangs slurred his words, and his smile was anything but reassuring.
"You were dead before," Jesse said dully, "you just hadn't stopped moving."
Dream-Xander pointedly stepped away from the table, and leaned against a column.
"Yeah, OK, bad wordage. You know what I mean."
"So how about a game, Jess?"
Jesse blinked. This wasn't what he'd expected at all. Death and destruction maybe, but not playing around. "What sort of game?" he asked.
The vampire's ridges and fangs smoothed out, and an achingly familiar goofy smile plastered itself on his face. "Truth or dare?" he suggested.
"With you? No way, man! You'd dare me to do something stupid."
"Only 'cos you won't face the truth!" Xander sang out, idly swinging around the column he had been leaning on.
"OK then, truth." Jesse knew this wasn't the brightest of moves, but he couldn't let Xander win.
"Why did you stake me?" Xander shot back instantly.
"Because you were evil."
"Oh come on, you never believed that crap."
"You killed Xander!"
Xander looked down at himself. "Walks like Xander, talks like Xander. Gee, I wonder if WatcherMan has been feeding you a line of bull?"
"You... you were going to kill Cordelia." Jesse was more shaken than he wanted to admit. Xander was far too good at cutting away the comforting things that Jesse had been telling himself. Truth to tell, he wasn't totally convinced that Xander was something else, something evil. Even after the way his former best friend had treated him, trying to kill him, Jesse still wanted to believe that something of Xander survived. That something of Xander could be saved.
"Ah, now we're getting somewhere. I was going to kill your precious Cordelia. Or was it just that I was getting off with her? I could have been about to kiss her for all you know. Did you kill me because you were jealous?"
"Shut up!" Jesse shouted. "That's enough. You had your question, now it's my turn!"
"Truth," said Xander promptly. "What?" he asked as Jesse looked momentarily surprised. "You'd just dare me to not eat for a week, and I'm too young to diet."
Xander's jokes were still as corny as ever, Jesse reflected as he tried to sort his own thoughts into order. What did he want to know? Could he trust the vampire not to lie anyway? Would it really make any difference in the end?
"Getting bored here," Xander said in a sing-song voice.
"Why did you let me kill you?" Jesse blurted out. It was the first thing that sprang to mind, and he had a feeling that a bored vampire was something to be avoided.
It was Xander's turn to blink in surprise. He covered it quickly, though. "Who says I let you?" he said.
"You didn't even try to get the stake away from me. You stood there, let me hold a stake to your chest and practically goaded me into it. Even I can do the math, Xan. Why?"
Xander looked somber. "Maybe I didn't think I was fast enough," he said. "Maybe I didn't think you had the guts. Maybe I thought that even if you did, I could stop you. Maybe... maybe I wanted you to do it." He looked at Jesse bleakly for a moment, then suddenly broke into a shit-eating grin. "Guess you'll never know, since Xander's dead and I'm just a figment of your imagination. My turn. Truth or dare?"
"Do I really need to tell you what an amazingly stupid idea this is?" Giles' voice came from the shadows at the edges of the club. Jesse barely glanced at him as he came into the light.
"Yeah, yeah," he said, concentrating on Xander though he spoke to Giles. "Evil vampire, stake on sight. Have I missed anything? Oh yeah, leave the slaying to the Slayer, that's it."
"Involving yourself with this creature in any way is incredibly dangerous, Jesse. Despite appearances, this is not your friend. Xander is dead. This being is not and never has been him. They may share some superficial memories, but that's as far as it goes. Think about this; last night he saved your life. Today he tried to take it. Are those really the actions of the same man, or just a particularly cruel form of evil?"
Giles was not helping, Jesse thought. Intellectually, he knew all this stuff; emotionally, given the choice between his childhood friend and a condescending Englishman, he knew which way his heart was jumping. "Giles, I know— what's wrong with your neck?"
Giles touched his neck, and looked aghast when his hand came away red. He was bleeding, a trickle of brightness against the dull tweed of his jacket. Before Jesse's horrified eyes the trickle became a torrent, more blood pouring out of the Watcher than a human body could possibly hold.
"Oh," Giles said in dazed surprise, and collapsed to the floor.
Jesse was frozen in shock. He didn't like Giles much, but that didn't mean that he wanted to see him dead. Did it?
"My bad," said Xander, smirking. "I got the munchies and, well, I was keeping Cordelia for dessert."
"You... He... Xander, you can't..."
Xander shook his head sadly. "You still don't get it, do you? I'm a vampire. I drink blood. It's what I do now. Or at least it's what I did before you killed me." He sighed, throwing Jesse a look that bordered on annoyance. "I'm bored with this. Let's play another game, hide and seek. You find me, I'll stop killing people."
"Xander, no! I..." Jesse shut his mouth. It was pointless, Xander wasn't there any more. Instead, the Bronze was suddenly crowded with teenagers with the vampire nowhere in sight. "I'm beginning to hate my dreams," he murmured. "I need to have words with my subconscious."
"I am your subconscious, moron," a voice whispered in his ear.
Jesse turned quickly, but Xander was already gone again. Jesse caught no more than a glimpse of a colourful Hawaiian shirt disappearing into the crowd. He swore quietly, and waded through the throng in what he could only hope was the right direction.
Somewhere between an eternity and thirty seconds later Jesse came across Cordelia. She was standing with her entourage, chatting away merrily. No one seemed to notice the two holes in her neck, or the small trickle of blood leading away from it. "Cordy!" he shouted.
Cordelia appeared to consider his cry. "Did anyone hear something just then?" she asked her cronies, not acknowledging Jesse's presence directly.
"Cordy, where's Xander? I've got to find him."
"There it is again, an annoying whining noise."
Some of the girls giggled, and suddenly it was more than Jesse would stand for. He grabbed Cordelia and spun her round until they were facing each other. "I. Need. To. Find. Xander."
"Take your hands off me, mister," Cordelia flared.
Normally, Jesse would have backed off and made conciliatory noises, but he was in no mood for that. "No. I haven't got time for your games, and besides this is my dream and you're dead here anyway. Now where is Xander?"
Cordelia looked at him in puzzlement that turned into unhappy comprehension. "That's right," she said, "I am dead, aren't I?" With those words she slumped to the floor, apparently lifeless.
Jesse crouched down, quickly checking for a pulse. He found nothing. Swearing loud and long, he stood and strode off into the crowd. Them coming too. last thing he heard from the Cordettes was Harmony saying "He's gone, Cordy, you can get up now. Cordy? Cordy!"
"Jesse!"
Jesse turned round to find Willow clinging to his arm. "Wills! Are you OK?" He inspected her neck quickly.
"I'm fine. What's the matter?"
"Xander's here somewhere."
"Oh good. Where is he?"
"Oh bad," Jesse contradicted her. "He's a vampire, remember?"
"Oh." Willow suddenly looked very fragile, and Jesse felt an urge to pat her hand reassuringly. "Do you really think he'd hurt me?" she asked in a small voice.
"I don't know," Jesse told her, scanning the crowd anxiously. "I hope not, but he's killed Giles and Cordy already."
"But we're his friends, he's known us since kindergarten."
"That makes you taste all the sweeter," said a familiar voice behind them. Jesse whipped round to see Xander holding Willow, sniffing at her neck. "Mmm, smells good enough to eat."
"I found you," Jesse said hopelessly. "You said you'd stop killing people if I found you."
"Huh? Oh, the game." Xander shrugged at him. "Sorry 'bout that, pal, guess I must have lied." Then he vamped out, fangs poised at Willow's neck.
Jesse punched him. This being a dream, Jesse wasn't too surprised when Xander went flying, crashing through a table before finishing up against the wall. "Don't touch her," he yelled. "Don't you dare touch her."
Xander sat up and rubbed his jaw. "Well, that was mature," he said sarcastically.
"Don't start it," Jesse practically snarled at him. "There's nothing of Xander left in you. He'd never hurt Willow, no matter what."
"Oh," said Xander as he got to his feet. "I guess if I'm not Xander, then there's no reason for me not to kill you." He smiled brightly at Jesse, then charged.
"Uh, some help here," Jesse shouted as he backed across the Bronze, desperately fending off the vampire. Unfortunately the club had emptied of people while he wasn't paying attention, and no one came at his call. As Xander's superior strength forced him against the wall, he glimpsed a petite blond perched on the pool table. "Buffy," he cried in relief. "Help!"
The Slayer peered critically at the backs of her hands. "Sorry Jesse, my nails aren't dry yet. Besides, you were the one who wanted to do the Slaying stuff. Are you telling me you can't take on one newly fledged vamp?"
"I can't, OK? Is that what you want to hear? I'm not good enough. Now help me, please!"
"Too late," Xander murmured, and bit.
Jesse sat bolt upright in bed, panting in shock. His hand flew to his neck where he had felt the needle-sharp fangs penetrate, and he sagged in relief as it came away dry. "No blood. A dream, that's all. It was just a nightmare."
That didn't stop it hurting, somehow. Xander was dead, and Jesse had done the right thing in staking the vampire that he'd become, but the loss still hurt. There was a Xander-shaped hole in Jesse's life now, something that no one else would ever be able to fill.
Sighing unhappily, Jesse settled back down and was soon lost to an uneasy sleep.
*****
"I was hoping she'd at least remember that I saved her life," Jesse confided to Willow. "Would it have killed her to say thank you? But no, she has to go and say she didn't see who pulled the big guy off of her, and to hear her tell it the guy was six foot eight with muscles like the Incredible Hulk. If I try and say it was me she'll just make me look stupid. Well, stupider."
"People have a tendency to rationalise what they can," Giles told him, "and forget what they can't."
"Believe me," Buffy said, "I've seen it happen."
"Well, I'll never forget it," Willow said.
"Me neither," Jesse added.
"Good," said Giles. "Next time you'll be prepared."
"Next time?" Jesse asked almost eagerly. "We get to play with more vampires?" It wasn't that he wanted to fight more vampires, he was painfully aware of his shortcomings in that department, but he was curiously glad that he wasn't finished with the undead. That they weren't finished. He still had a lot of anger to burn off, anger at having his best friend snatched away from him.
"Not just vampires," Giles replied with matching glee, making Jesse wonder for a moment what the stuffy Englishman had to be angry about. "We might have to face witches, werewolves, demons, Lord knows what."
"I can hardly wait," said Buffy, full of false cheer.
Giles frowned at her. "We are at the centre of a mystical convergence," he admonished, then looked off into the distance, eyes unfocused. "We might be all that stands between the Earth and its total destruction."
"You're enjoying this way too much," Jesse said.
"I don't know," Buffy told him, "you've got to look on the bright side. I'm pinning my hopes on getting kicked out of school."
"Oh yeah," Willow agreed enthusiastically. As the girls wandered off, they could be heard discussing what was most likely to work, and what had already been done this year.
"The Earth is doomed," Giles said to no one in particular.
Jesse paused. His memories of the nightmare were somewhat fuzzy, but he did remember one thing clearly. He wasn't up to anything much in the vampire-hunting stakes, but to do anything about it he'd have to swallow his pride.
"Hey Giles," he asked quietly, "you know you're supposed to be training Buffy? Well, that's kinda a stupid question, obviously you know that. Would you have time to train me too?"
Giles stopped abruptly. "Whatever for?" he asked. "You aren't the Slayer, you shouldn't even think of taking on vampires by yourself."
"Yeah I know. It's just if we are going to be fighting ghosties and ghoulies, I just thought being able to fight at all might help."
Giles gave him a long hard stare. "I'm not promising anything," he said, "but see me after school. In the library."
Jesse shuddered. The library. If it meant helping to be sure that no one else had to go through what Xander went through, he could brave that much concentrated knowledge. You had to make sacrifices, after all, if you were serious about this Slaying business.