Chapter Text
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“Okay, Danny,” Dr. Moore said, “you can get dressed and I will be back in a few minutes.”
Danny, nodded, pulling himself up from the exam table and swinging his legs down, waiting until his urologist pulled the curtain across the door. He slid down and grabbed his underwear, pulling the paper gown off from his shoulders and tossing it into the trash bin near the table.
He had just enough time to slide up his boxers and step into his shorts before he heard a soft knock at the door. He pulled his tee over his head, threading his arms into the sleeves and called, “come in.”
Julie, the nurse Danny saw for his check-in, opened the curtain and headed for the little desk that held a computer. “Have a seat when you’re done,” she told him. “Dr. Moore will be in a few and in the meantime, I am going to print out your scrips and instructions.”
Danny slid his feet into his flip flops and wondered why he hadn't even bothered to dress a little better on his second visit to see the urologist. Steve had told him this morning, before he had left for work, that if you gotta get naked anyway, might as well not put on too many clothes to begin with…of course, he thought that Steve was probably thinking of a slightly different scenario, one that involved them both getting naked and sweaty and damn, he needed to stop that line of thought before other parts of his body began to take an interest.
His cock already ached…and not in a fun way…he hurt.
Earlier Dr. Moore had shown him how to do the self-injection and instructed him on how it was preferable that he stand and move around while gently massaging the injection site to help spread the medicine throughout his organ and sure enough, ten minutes later Danny was so hard, he was sure he could hammer in some nails or something…Or, you know…hammer something a little more pleasurable, like Steve.
It was sorta a weird sensation though, because even though he had an erection, probably even a better erection since before he had been injured and needed surgery, he wasn’t feeling aroused, like at all.
He shook his head, and sank into the chair situated beside the small desk, waiting for Julie to finish typing in her notes and print out his paperwork.
He knew that it would be hard to be spontaneous if he had to use the medicine, but he was still hopeful that it would be a temporary situation.
Before the doctor had gotten down to the business of showing how his meds worked and then injected him again with an antidote of sorts, so he wouldn’t have to walk around with a hard on for next however long it took for the medicine to wear off, she explained the findings of the monitoring test he had done over the last several nights and she seemed optimistic.
She told him that since he had been able to achieve some natural erections while he slept, even though most weren’t in a range that would allow him to have sex, that his problem was most likely physical, neurological and that the steps that he where taking now would allow him to resume his sex life and hopefully even help with the physical underlying injuries to his nerves.
Of course, she also asked him if he and his partner wanted a referral to see a sex therapist, so…obviously, she didn’t think his problem was all physical and he couldn’t deny those findings even if he wanted to.
He knew that being in a sexual relationship with Steve had dredged up old memories and feelings from his very dysfunctional and downright destructive sexual relationship with Richie.
But Steve sure as hell wasn’t Richie, so he took the offered card and knew that he and Steve needed to finish their aborted conversations about his past…he had no idea how, mind you, just that he needed to tell Steve everything and then they could decide together if he or they both should speak to someone about it.
Julie hummed softly as she scooted the chair back from the desk and reached over to the printer to pull off the copies she had made him, stacking them against their edges against the desk. “So,” she began, handing Danny the papers, “The prescription has been sent electronically to your pharmacy so you can pick it up at your convenience and these,” she tapped the papers he was holding with her finger, “are some instructions and helpful hints on how to best use the meds. Don’t skip reading them, okay?”
“Okay,” he folded the papers and slipped them under his phone, that was still sitting on the desk.
Dr. Moore stepped into the room and Julie stepped out, patting his arm as she passed him. “See you next time, Danny.”
“Bye, Julie.”
“Okay,” the doctor was all business as she sat in the chair and pulled up the nurse’s notes on the computer. “I see you go back to Dr. Hoy in several weeks…have you decided if you are going to do the ostomy reversal, if it’s an option?”
He opened his mouth to say yes, hell yes, the sooner he could get rid of his colostomy the better, but then he shut his mouth and really thought it through.
Did he want to go through another major surgery? The first time the decision was out of his hands, but this time he would be electing to go under the knife and just thinking about the procedure itself and the extended recovery time, the pain, the possible bowel problems, more time away from work and the strain it could have on him physically and emotionally...Danny clearly remembered how teary eyed and weepy or moody and downright mean he was to anyone around him, but mostly to Steve, and what about…what if he does make progress with his current problem and then have to start all over after his next recovery…what if he wouldn’t be able to start over, what if…
“You know,” she said, leaning closer to him and squeezing his arm in comfort, “you don’t have to decide right now or even on the day of your appointment. Talk it over with Dr. Hoy, weigh the benefits with possible complications and speak with your partner, with your family.” She straightened up again and crossed her legs, telling him, “I’m just saying you have time, so don’t feel like you have to have all the answers now…in fact, the holidays are coming, why not see what your options are and then plan to make a decision after the New Year, that way you will be able to return to work for a while, get back into a more regular routine…lots of people go back to work, back to their previous life style with an ostomy and have no problem getting back to living normal lives.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. “That sounds like a solid plan.”
“Okay, good.” She turned back to the computer screen, typing something into his electronic chart and said, “I want to see you back in three weeks or so. I see your scripts been sent to the pharmacy…if you decide at the end of the month you want to continue to use the injectable, I will send over a six-month refill and then you can just email me or call when you need refills.
So, most side effects are mild, but be sure to read the insert and call me if any side effect lingers or is more severe, especially if your erection doesn’t go away within four hours.” She stood then, so he stood too, picking up his phone and printouts. “I’ll see you next month,” she put her palm gently on his shoulder as they walked toward the door. “See Emma to make your follow up appointment.”
“I will. Thank you.”
It didn’t take long to make his next appointment for November fifteenth at eleven, which would be easy to remember, because it was the same day as his appointment with Dr. Hoy, only he was seeing Danny at nine.
Shoving the clinic door open, Danny walked through the out crop of trees and bushes, thinking it was too damn hot to be seeing scare crows and bales of hay and pumpkins lining the walkway...he still had not gotten used to cold weather holidays or feeling very festive in the humidity and heat of Hawaii.
Back in Jersey the trees would already be glorious shades or reds and oranges and the air would be crisp and clear and pumpkin everything would be available in every coffee shop, bakery and grocery store and he would be taking Grace to Miller’s farm to stuff their own scare crow and take a hay ride and pick out some good pumpkins for carving and pie and they would drink real hand pressed apple cider and eat fresh cider donuts and he would have on a warm sweater…
Of course, there was no reason why they couldn’t do most of those things this year. He could do some internet recon to see what passes as a pumpkin patch around here and take his baby girl to go pick some out…make some Jack-o’-lanterns and take her on some uninterrupted trick or treating and make some newer memories and hopefully be feeling festive in no time, plus Steve…Steve would want to do all those things with him and Grace too, which just made his mouth smile almost as big as his heart.
He somehow got to his car while thinking of making pie, which led to thinking about turkey and their annual football game, which led to thinking about Christmas shopping and mistletoe and tree lights and ornaments…his future, and maybe talking Steve into visiting with his family over Grace’s Christmas break, and slid in behind the wheel.
The clock told him it was only twelve twenty, so he could drive over to the palace and see Steve, take him to lunch at Mamie's, tell him about his appointment and maybe talk to him a little bit about the therapist…because he wanted to be as truthful as possible…going forward, he didn’t want to hide anything from his partner, so he pulled out into the afternoon lunch traffic and headed toward work.
He decided he should just surprise Steve and it would be nice to visit with Kono and Chin, who just started back to work today after the scare with Malia…hell, he might even sit at his desk and work on some emails and review some reports to see how creative Steve had been in explaining some of his actions in Danny's absence, if the team where away from the office and he found himself waiting.
Danny knew that they were still working on the murder of the developer, Steve had always filled him in, wanting to include him so that he wouldn’t miss work so much, and that they were getting nowhere fast. The killer had been extremely cautious and had not left any forensic evidence, which seemed almost impossible. Their only lead had been similar murders that had occurred in Florida, but since they only had one DB here, they couldn’t consider it serial yet.
It only took him a little over fifteen minutes to make it to work, and he was pleasantly surprised by the greeting he had received from the guard at the door and a few other people he knew from the surrounding offices in the building.
When he took the stairs up, a few ladies that worked in Social Services hugged him and patted his back in welcome, but when he opened the glass doors to 5-0’s office space it looked pretty empty.
He could see neither Kono or Chin were in their offices and when he stopped at his own, he was a bit surprised to see stacks of files on his desk and Steve’s coffee mug sitting to one side of his computer.
He heard some muffled noises coming from Steve’s office and went to ask him what was going on, but when he pushed opened the door, he couldn’t stop his mouth from falling open at the sight of the woman sitting in Steve’s chair, behind Steve’s desk, her feet propped up on the desk blotter, talking into her phone as if she had moved in a long time ago, as if she had owned the place.
She spotted him and waved, dropping her feet and wrapping up her phone call to walk toward him, and before he knew what was happening she was pulling him into a warm hug, “Danny…” she squeezed him a little too hard, but he allowed his arms to come up to encircle her loosely. “I am so happy to see you…how are you feeling?”
When she pulled back, Danny had to work his mouth to get it moving. “I, I’m alright…how are you, Catherine?”
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She was pleasantly surprised to see Danny come into Steve’s office. He hugged her when she hugged him and she could tell that he had lost some weight, that he had looked a little pale, but considering all that he had been through, he looked damned good. “I am doing fine…come on, sit down.” She led him over to the couch and sat with him. “Steve’s in a meeting, if you are looking for him. I heard you two are roommates for now, so I can call him if you need a ride home or something,”
She puzzled over the peculiar look that briefly flashed across his face before he shook his head and said, “no…I ah…I just thought I’d stop in to visit…I ah…”
“Oh, well that’s great…I’m sure Chin and Kono would love to see you too…they should be back soon. They went to follow up on a lead,” but she stopped that train of thought because she didn’t think that Steve would have updated Danny on their current case, so why bother with the details.
He stood then, nodding his head, looking out toward the bull pen and his own office.
“Oh, you know, I told Steve I didn’t mind taking over your office, but he insisted I take his…I guess he didn’t…well, anyway…if it bothers you he is in there messing up your stuff, I have no problem switching…”
“No,” he assured, “it’s fine…it’s not like I’m back on duty yet.”
She had no idea if or when Danny might be coming back, but since she had only been on her temporary duties for less than a week, she hoped it wouldn’t be anytime too soon, even if that did make her sound like a horrible person. She loved Danny and wanted what was best for him and hurrying back into this crazy wonderful job probably wasn’t what was best.
“Do you have an idea of when the doctors will allow you to return?” she asked a beat later, seeing the same odd expression ghost over his face before he looked away.
“I ah…Could be a few more weeks, but even then…” he seemed to have a hard time swallowing, but went on, “it would only be desk duty, you know…for a while anyway.”
“Well I am sure everyone can’t wait for you to get back.” And she meant that. It would be good for things to go back to normal for the team, in fact, if Danny were here, they may even be farther along on this current case, but she didn’t want to get into the case with him, because it would be unfair to burden him with information he couldn’t help with, at least not in his current condition.
She stood now too, wondering if she should give him another hug and send him on his way, so she was a little surprised when he turned to look at her and said, “how about we go grab lunch? I haven’t eaten yet and I know you probably haven’t either.”
She thought about it for a second or two but couldn’t think of a reason not to. She has hungry and who knew when she might get an opportunity to eat again today, although she was hoping to convince Steve to take her out for dinner and maybe some drinks this evening. She could maybe get a little recon from Danny, because she and Steve had had hardly any time to talk, to even try to reconnect, because every day Steve had had some excuse, which usually involved Danny, to beg off dinner and whatever might have happened after dinner. “Sure,” she finally answered. “Let me just grab my stuff.’
She watched him nod then head out to the bull pen. He stopped and looked in to his office again as she grabbed her phone and keys.
She was just about to ask him where he would like to go eat when Chin and Kono came into the squad room and rushed at Danny. She stepped from the office and watched as they each hugged him tight, Kono kissing his cheek and Chin grabbing the back of Danny’s neck and squeezing. “What brings you by?” Chin asked at the same time Kono said, “How was your appointment?”
Danny told them he was just visiting and that everything was fine and she couldn’t help to wonder what fine meant?
“I brought in the leftover cake from Sunday, brah…it’s in the break room if you want some…”
“Malia was so happy to see that cake and boy, was it ever delicious,” Kono added. “I want red velvet for my birthday, what do you say?”
Catherine didn’t know what they were going on about, but she did have some of the carrot cake that Chin had brought in from his family gathering for his birthday.
“I think that can be arranged,” Danny told her, turning to see that she had made her way toward them.
Chin and Kono cast her a strange look, but she cleared her throat and told them, “Danny has invited me to lunch, so will you let Steve know I won’t be long if he gets back before I do.”
Now the two gave each other a strange look, and then a meaningful one towards Danny, but she didn’t feel like deciphering whatever subliminal conversation they were having…the last fifteen minutes had been strange and awkward enough.
“Ready to go,” Danny’s voice, so near, startled her, but she nodded, gladly taking the arm he held out for her. Danny had always been such a gentleman and Steve sure could learn a thing or two from him. “I’ll drive,” he told her and she had no doubt that when they got to his car he would even open the door for her.
They walked arm in arm out of the unit and she caught sight of Kono and Chin scrambling for Kono’s office, Chin already had his phone out and to his ear as she and Danny turned the corner and headed down the stairs and sure enough, Danny opened the car door for her and waited until she had slid in and put on her seat belt before gently closing the door.
“Where too,” she asked him as he carefully slid behind the wheel, wincing a little as he adjusted himself in the seat and put on his own seat belt.
He started up the car, casting her a small, almost sad smile and said, “I know the perfect place…Steve and I…well, you’ll like it, I’m sure…you ready to go?”
She smiled back and nodded, hoping that Danny wasn’t overdoing it by spending the morning at the doctor’s and having lunch with her…she hoped that he was going to be okay and that he would take his time to recover.
“So, tell me about this place…what’s good?”
“Well, everything is homemade…they have the best noodle soup…”
She listened as he droned on, only paying half attention as Danny guided the Camaro through the thinning traffic, thinking that if Steve liked the place, she would make a point to invite him there herself…maybe if she found one of his favorite haunts, he would be more willing to have dinner with her and then they could see what happened from there.
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