Chapter Text
"Why are you looking at Facebook?" Olruggio asked, leaning over the couch to look over Qifrey's shoulder.
"Are you done with your work?"
His husband nodded. "Seriously, why are you looking up Walmart on Facebook at ten at night?"
"I'm trying to find a place selling Cutecakes," he said.
"Cutecakes?" asked Olruggio.
"They're blind boxes," Qifrey explained. "Each one has a cake squishy of a different color in it. The rarest is the confetti cake. The confetti is sparkles, you see."
"Oh, I see. They're like those things which were popular last month, aren't they? What were they called? Neeputee."
"No, they're different. Neeputee wasn't a blind box. Because this one is, it's even more in demand. Since you want to get the confetti one, you know. People open up dozens on TikTok at a time trying to find it. They're super trendy, but they're impossible to find. I want to try and get some for our girls, but it's been hard."
"Can't you order them online?" Olruggio asked.
Qifrey shook his head. "They're sold out there, too. You have to get lucky and find one in a store. Since the weekend starts tomorrow, I thought it would be a good time to look for them."
"Don't stress yourself out too much on your days off looking for them. It's the trend of the month, if not a week. Before you know it, everyone will have forgotten about it and it'll be a hunk of… What are squishies made of? Plastic? Rubber?"
That was a good question. "I don't know."
"It'll be a hunk of something gathering dust in the bottom of their drawers."
"It'll make them happy, though," said Qifrey. That was all that really mattered.
"So will plenty of other things," said Olruggio.
"No. It's like Goofy Bandz, those shaped bracelets that were popular when we were in middle school. Don't you feel nostalgic when you think about them?"
"Not really."
Qifrey didn't either.
"Well, they will," he insisted.
"You just want to spoil them…"
What was wrong with that? They had all suffered through their own hardships before him and Olruggio became their foster parents. Qifrey wanted to make sure the rest of their childhoods were filled with joy.
In the morning, he checked Facebook right away. The local Walmart had just gotten a fresh shipment of them in. Most of the stuff he needed to buy could just be gotten at the local grocery store, but he decided to go there to shop instead. He could buy some for the girls and Olruggio, do the rest of his shopping, and go home. The girls would be ecstatic when he picked them up. It would definitely make their week.
There was just one problem, though.
They were sold out.
There wasn't a single one on the shelf. The cardboard boxes they were stored in were still there, staring mockingly at him with their smiley little cake faces, but the squishies themselves weren't present.
Qifrey double-checked his Facebook. The photo of a full display was only from a couple hours ago. He turned towards a nearby employee and asked.
"Are you already out of these?"
"Those stupid… Uh, I mean those things?" He nodded. "Some chick came by and bought out the whole stock. I think she's an influencer, she buys gunk like that once a week."
"Is… Would there be any in the back?"
A brief look of disgust flashed on his face before his customer service smile returned. "I don't think so, but I can check if you want me to."
That was code for 'no, there's almost definitely not any in the back, please tell me I don't have to check so I won't waste my time.'
"You don't have to check."
The employee breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, every Walmart in the area got some in today, so you can check those, if you have the time."
Qifrey had never been more thankful they lived in a dystopia where they were multiple Walmarts in a 30-minute radius. This one may be all out of Cutecakes, but surely, the other one will. He drew off to the other one.
There they were! The display was sparse, but there was still a few of the Cutecakes left. A miracle! The problem was, there already was a gaggle of teenage girls were ooo-ing and aw-ing over them.
Qifrey stood back and waited. Please don't buy the rest of them up, please don't buy the rest of them up. Leave five left. Or at least four.
One of the teens noticed him standing back and looking.
"Do you want to buy one?" she asked hesitantly.
He wanted five.
"Oh, no. You… You can buy as many as you want."
They were youths themselves. Someday, these teenagers would look back on the Cutecakes with nostalgia and joy. They'll find one in the bottom of a storage box and recall their youth fondly.
Or at least that's what Qifrey told himself as they wiped them out. The Cutecakes were done. Only the teasing boxes were left. "Look what was just here!" the cake on them seemed to be saying. "You could've had one, if you weren't so nice!"
No, at least it had gone to children. Though, Qifrey supposed, they too may have TikToks.
Fortunately, he lived in a dystopia where they were multiple Walmarts in a 45-minute radius. Across town he drove, again. He didn't go out to this area much, so he got a bit lost. Every second he spent lost was another second where people could be buying Cutecakes and there would be less for his children. He pulled over, took a deep breath, and entered the location in his car's GPS.
Somehow, he did end up making a wrong turn.
He walked into the Walmart as fast as he could without standing out. He headed to the toy section. And yes! There on the display, there was a few. There…
There was three.
There was only three left. Qifrey nearly fell to his knees in the middle of the Walmart. So close, but so far.
He would've been fine with four. That would've been enough for all of the girls. He wanted to get one for Olruggio too, but ultimately, he didn't need it. Three, though? What could he do with three?
He supposed he could buy all three now, and get one different squishy. But what if none of the other girls wanted to be the odd one out? Then they would argue. Eventually someone (probably Coco) would feel the need to sacrifice herself, and she'll lie and say she doesn't want the Cutecake when she definitely does, and then she'll surely feel bad on the inside even if she hides her true feelings behind a smile. No. He couldn't do that.
He could just buy three now, and hide them away someplace. Eventually they would be restocked, and he would be able to buy a fourth one. But by then, would Cutecakes even be trendy anymore? Probably not. The girls wouldn't want them.
No. He couldn't buy them. They would best be saved for other children.
…
Please let a child be the one to get it.
Out of desperation he checked the Five Below next door, as he knew they sometimes sold them there. There wasn't even a spot for them. The employee looked like she was sick about people asking about Cutecakes when he went up to her.
"We last got them a few days ago. People were lining up at the door in the morning to buy them, though, I've heard the store a couple towns away still has some."
He didn't have time to drive out there. He needed to start making supper in an hour.
If cars could trudge, Qifrey's car would've trudged sadly home. Unfortunately it couldn't, so he smoothly rode back instead.
"Where are the groceries?" asked Olruggio as he walked in.
"Groceries?"
"You know. The reason why you went to Walmart. What did take you so long?"
That was right. He was supposed to shop for weekly necessities today, and not drive around looking for toys. He had completely forgotten to buy anything.
"I forgot them," Qifrey admitted, for what else was he supposed to do.
"In the car?"
"I forgot to buy them."
"What— How? Qifrey, you were gone for hours! What were you doing all day?"
"Well, I… I got distracted."
"By what?" Olruggio asked.
"I'll tell you later." No need to admit his failure in front of the children.
"If there's no groceries, can we order pizza tonight?" asked Richeh.
Not a bad idea. Qifrey was about to agree.
"I can go real quick," said Olruggio. Qifrey could feel the disappointment from the girls besides him.
"Are you sure? It's been a while since we've gotten takeout."
"We were supposed to have chicken curry tonight, that's one of your favorites. I'll just get what we need for supper. I can help you with the rest of the shopping tomorrow."
"I don't need help," Qifrey said.
"You do." And off he went.
Well, shopping with Olruggio was always fun. The girls would probably want to come too. Maybe it wouldn't be that bad. They could make a side trip to the mall. With all those stores, maybe one would have some Cutecakes in stock.
Qifrey started cooking the rice. They had some of that left. The girls were discussing how they should've fought harder for pizza a bit too loudly in the living room. Qifrey was a child once. He understood. Sometime next week they would have to get it.
Olruggio returned a bit later. He walked in, setting the bags on the counter.
"You'll never guess what I found."
"Was there a bacon sale?"
"No…"
Shame. It had been a while since the last one. The freezer was starting to run out.
"It's even better," said Olruggio. "Girls, come in!"
Olruggio dumped the contents of one of the grocery sacks on the table. Five little boxes fell out, one on its side. Olruggio straightened it. A cake with soulless eyes stared up.
"Cutecakes? Real ones?" Tetia squealed. "However did you find them?"
"They had a whole table filled of them at the grocery store," said Olruggio. "I guess since it's a place you don't think to go to look for them, there was still some left."
The grocery store. He had gone to three different Walmarts, and they were there the whole time at the grocery store five minutes down the street. Of course they would. Qifrey sat down in a chair. Olruggio turned towards him.
"These are the cakes you were talking about, right? The gacha ones."
"Blind box," he said.
"Same thing."
He couldn't disagree.
"There's five, one for you too. Is it okay I got them? They were kind of expensive, but… Qifrey?"
Qifrey could cry, he was so happy. "Olruggio, you're an absolutely amazing person. I love you."
"Huh? No need to get so emotional over it. Hey…" Olruggio patted him on the shoulder. The girls were fortunately too busy opening the Cutecakes to pay attention to his overly-emotional reaction.
"I got blue!" Richeh held hers up, like a grand prize.
"Purple," said Agott, looking at hers carefully.
"Pink! Perfect!" Tetia was happy with hers.
"I got light green! Or is it yellow?" Coco poked at it.
They had all gotten their signature colors, too. Did Olruggio have x-ray vision? How did he do it?
"I really love you, Olruggio," he said.
"Why don't you open yours?" Olruggio suggested.
He did. There it was. The confetti cake. The girls around him gasped. Even Agott seemed shocked.
"A one-in-five hundred chance," she said.
"You're so lucky, Mr. Qifrey!" said Coco.
"Trade me!" Richeh held out hers. "Blue's your favorite color, isn't it?"
"It's your favorite color too…" said Agott.
"Olruggio can have it."
"Me? I don't—"
"You deserve it." Qifrey handed it towards him.
"Ah…" Olruggio poked the squishy. "Well, all right." He set it on the table. "It wasn't just that they had at the grocery store, though. He pulled something else out of the bag. "They had Pokémon cards, too!"
"Pokémon cards!" Tetia and Coco screamed, almost in unison.
"Hooray!" cheered Richeh.
Agott merely gaped. "I don't remember the last time I saw an unopened pack in the stores."
The grocery store jackpot. It was like Olruggio was a god. Qifrey was in disbelief at his abilities.
"I got six packs, one for myself too, this time. Was that okay? Qifrey?"
He was so lucky he was married to this man.
It turned out Olruggio had forgotten the chicken, a key ingredient in chicken curry. They ended up ordering pizza anyways.