Chapter Text
The cold air felt sharp and electric. It filled Katya’s lungs in a pleasant, distracting way, numbing her from the inside. Her back hit the wall of the alley she was in, and she slid down, slowly sinking to the floor. Growing up in Moscow meant she and the cold were very well acquainted. Even in her inadequate clothing, the cold was welcoming. She looked at her feet and saw she was bleeding. She was only able to grab some flimsy sandals on her way out, and she must have stepped on glass. She hadn’t felt it; she couldn’t feel much of anything. She wasn’t sure if it was the adrenaline or the cold, but she was already dreading the moment when sensation would return.
She tried to think of where she could go, who she could call, and if she should ask for help. She drew a blank. She had friends, close friends, good friends, but… she was ashamed. She didn’t need them to know… to know this.
She sat for a while, and her face started to throb. She was hoping the cold would help with the swelling. She thought about grabbing a handful of snow to place on her cheek, but the snow had been sitting on the ground for days. It mixed with the grime of the city, and she was sure it would do more harm than good.
She looked up at the night sky and saw a pretty crescent moon. It felt so big and close. Like she could reach out and hold it in her palm, then she felt her phone vibrate. She looked down and sighed. Uncle Ilya’s name popped up on her phone screen. She had taken a screenshot of him in a press conference where he had grimaced at a reporter’s question. It was a horribly unflattering photo, and it pissed him off to know that’s how he had been saved to her phone. Which of course pleased her immensely. Who would keep him humble if not her?
This was the third time today her uncle had called. She’d been sending him to voicemail and texting him how busy she was, but he was getting more and more persistent. This time, he had called her from FaceTime, and her finger hovered over the decline button. Instead, she waited for the call to go voicemail. She tried to swallow, and she felt sharp pain. She tried to clear her throat, but she knew that if she spoke, it would sound hoarse. Her damn uncle was so perceptive that he would intuit the truth without her saying a thing. In fact, she has a feeling he already suspected. Thus, the incessant phone calls.
Her phone vibrated again. This time, it was just a regular phone call.
She shook her head. It was past midnight, and while she would usually be awake, she could just feign sleepiness and get him off the phone before he noticed her voice.
“Hello,” she answered the phone in her best ‘teenager who doesn’t want to be awake’ voice.
“Katyusha, you have been avoiding your favorite uncle.”
“You’re my only uncle, and you don’t seem to understand time zones. It’s 12:30 am in Moscow.”
“Yes, yes, but I know you are awake, you are a creature of the night.”
“I’m going to bed, Uncle, goodnight.”
“Do not hang up this phone Katya Rozanov. I know you are not in your bed!”
“You do not know this. I am in bed.” She insisted.
“You are a liar who tells lies. I can see your location, and you are not at home. It is a school night Katyusha. Where are you? And why do you not answer my FaceTime?”
She bit her lip out of habit and winced. Her lip split, and she could taste the dried blood. She shook her head to get her bearings, but she was unsure of what lie she could tell to get him off the phone. She had forgotten that when he had sent her an iPhone one of the conditions was that he gave was that she would share her location with him always. Not that he could do much from Canada, but he said it made him feel better. Even on a different continent, he was more of a father to her than Andrei.
“I am going to call you on FaceTime. If you do not answer the phone, I will be in Russia tomorrow morning.”
“Uncle, you know you cannot come back to-”
“I can do whatever I want. Answer the phone.”
The call ended, and immediately she saw his FaceTime request come through. She knew he wasn’t bluffing, and she knew it would be disastrous if he tried to come back to Russia.
She sighed and accepted the call.
She closed her eyes. She didn't want to see her face yet -and she didn’t want to face her uncle’s ire- so she kept her eyes closed when she accepted the call.
She heard the tone that indicated the call had started and then a sharp intake of breath.
“Oh Katyusha,” he said with so much pity in his voice she wanted to crawl out of her skin. She opened her eyes, and there she was- bruising on her right eye and along her cheekbone, a split lip with blood trickling down her jaw, and bruising around her neck.
“I fell.” She lied. “I hit the ice trying a new move. Figure skating is not hockey, but you hit the ice the same.”
“And the bruising on your neck? Is that from the fall as well?”
She shrugged. “I’m 16, I’m trying kinky things.”
“Katya, don’t protect him.”
Him- they both knew who they were talking about. Her father. Andrei.
“I am not protecting him! I hate him! But there is nothing I can do but suffer this man until I am 18!”
And then there was silence. She looked at her uncle and saw rage simmering beneath. She knew he wasn’t angry at her exactly. But he was angry, and from across the world, he was also helpless. This is why she didn’t call him in the first place. There was no fixing this. No amount of money could change the fact that she would have to live with this man until she turned 18, because he would never let her go willingly.
“How long?” Uncle Ilya asked tersely.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“How long!”
Katya shook her head and felt her eyes water. It burned to keep the tears back, but she didn’t want to cry- not for this.
“Ilya!” Katya heard Shane calling for her uncle through the phone.
“I’ll be right there!” Uncle Ilya called back in English.
“Go,” Katya insisted. She desperately wanted this call to be over. “I’ll be okay.”
“You’re in a dark alleyway in the middle of Moscow in the dead of night. This is not indicative of being okay.”
She saw her uncle look back and saw Shane in the doorway holding their dog. “Ilya, something is wrong with Anya.”
Katya turned off the camera immediately. “Hello Shane!” She called out cheerfully in English.
“Hi, Katya!” He said as he walked closer to the camera. “Why did you turn your camera off?”
“Thank you for calling. Uncle, go take care of Anya. Bye, guys!” She continued in English for Shane’s benefit and then hung up the phone before her uncle could protest.
She sighed, and her head lulled back against the wall. And now someone knew. It didn’t make her feel better, but it also didn’t make her feel worse. Not exactly, but now there was this hurt in her heart. She knew her uncle would feel guilty about this, but there was no need. She could tolerate pain. She had been figure skating all her life, and pain was built into her. It was two years, two years, and she would be free.
As for tonight… she looked at her phone. It was 1 am. She could wander for another half hour and then go back home. Hopefully, he had enough vodka in him to pass out so she could just sneak back in.
Her phone buzzed, and she looked down to see that her uncle had sent her a series of text messages. She didn’t have the energy to read them now.
She sighed and stood from her spot in the alley and walked into the night.