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It was said that the songs of the Angels could cure the sadness of the heart. Plenty of humans had asked her to sing them a lullaby, to quell their sorrows with her voice, and she had tried to help every single one of them. She had hugged them and felt their bodies relax, their minds clearing, and their smiles finally coming back.
Koitar just wished her powers could work on herself.
It was late at night, her room barely illuminated by the moonlight bestowed upon them today by Aria and her Eternal Moon. She was almost done, and in the next few days Cannon would take her place.
It had always been like that since she was created: Sonnet, Aria, Cannon. Sonnet, Aria, Cannon. Iridescent, Eternal, Frost. All three were in the sky, but only one was visible, her moonlight alone illuminating the land for thirty days before her sister took her place. But today, Koitar wished that Aria would stay longer. She wished that the sisters would do her a favor and allow Eternity to illuminate her path for the days ahead, so that it would not abandon her on such an important occasion. As brave as she was, she was scared.
The Goddess of the Dawnstar was sitting by the window, looking down on her people. She could hear the laughter of those fighting against sleep, the fire cracking from a bonfire someone had lit somewhere close to her tower, the murmur of the sages, the machines working. If she closed her eyes, she could hear her own heart, whispering about freedom. And if she focused, she could feel Their gaze, daring her to keep going, reminding her of what could happen.
She had been sitting there for what felt like hours, going over her plans in her head while she hummed a tune about love to pacify herself, when she saw her lover approaching the tower. Koitar knew them by heart, knew how long it would take them to reach their shared chamber, so she got up and started preparing herself for what needed to be done. She didn’t move from her spot by the window, pleading to the moon for a little more courage.
Five minutes later, like clockwork, she heard the door open. She felt Seutervoinen moving around the room for a few moments, lighting up the fireplace to warm his mortal body. She was an angel, she had never felt the cold of the North, but she knew how fierce it could be. She should’ve lit the fire herself to keep the room warm for them, but she was so worried she had forgotten. She wanted to turn around and apologize, but she couldn’t move, couldn’t utter a word.
Apparently, she didn’t need to.
Strong arms wrapped around her waist, a forehead resting between her shoulderblades, between where her wings would begin if she summoned them.
“Please, talk to me. What worries you?”
Love was not clouding Koitar’s mind when she said that Seutervoinen was, without a doubt, the smartest person in the whole Golden City. She was probably the smartest in the world. No one could do what she had done, not out there beyond the firmament and not down here, in the land that didn’t belong to her. If she could map the cosmos, adapt to a different civilization, work the Mekhaneikos, and understand human composition, what hope could Koitar have that she wouldn’t know how to read her like an open book, too?
She put both her hands on top of her lover’s, right above her navel, and tried to buy herself some time.
“It was a long day. Tomorrow will be longer.”
“Did your sisters leave already?” They accompanied the question with a gentle kiss on the exposed skin of her back.
All angels were Koitar’s sister, but she knew who they meant.
“They left after lunch. Zibai wanted to be as far from here as possible by tomorrow morning, so I’m guessing they are already in Lang-Gan.”
“What all of you are doing for Nicole is beautiful. How such a vile god could create such caring beings…”
Koitar sighed. This matter had troubled her since the very beginning.
“I’m afraid of what could happen if we lose and she’s left alone. I don’t want to expose her to the malice we have witnessed, but if she’s let in the dark forever she may never understand.”
Koitar felt hands on her hips, and when she realized, she was facing Seutervoinen. She had never seen her true form, but she couldn’t believe that it could be as beautiful as this one. In their first meeting, she had confessed to Koitar how she had sneaked into the planet, how it had felt to indwell the body of a human, and in the back of her mind she appreciated the choice of human she had made. She was also aware that she would feel the exact same way with any other body Seutervoinen could inhabit, because she didn’t love her form, but the mind inside it. Once, lying down together after a moment of ecstasy, she had said that if she had decided to embody a tree, she would’ve kept it forever in her backyard, and when her last moments came, she would’ve ended her life perched upon its branches. She had framed it as a joke born from the moment, but she meant it.
Now, looking into his starry eyes, she could see the same love and devotion she felt staring back at her.
“You are not leaving her alone. We have been recording everything that happened, if things go wrong, she will be able to find out why. She will understand.”
Koitar nodded. She didn’t know if she agreed with their statement, but discussing it further was useless. She wasn’t going to bring Nicole into it, she was not even comfortable having her in Hyperborea. If they all perished in the upcoming war, she preferred for her little sister to hate her forever than to die alongside them.
“Is everything ready for tomorrow?” He grabbed her hands and led them to sit down at their little sofa next to the hearth. He must still be cold. Once down, he still didn’t let go of her hands.
“I told some of my sisters to summon the rest of them. I don’t know how many will actually come, but I hope it’s enough to spread the word to all of them. I want my words to reach everywhere.”
There was a moment of silence, both lovers looking into the flames, as if they held all the answers they needed.
“How do you feel about all of this?” Seutervoinen asked, softly. “Knowing that the end is near?”
And at that moment, she knew that she couldn’t postpone it anymore. They were right, time was running out, and the longest she waited to speak up, the more it would hurt.
“We did what we could.” She said, and she meant it. “We always knew that our rebellion wouldn’t work as we wished, and I abandoned hope of seeing the heavenly throne breaking long ago. But I’m not scared. Knowing this won’t deter me. We will fight until the end, being either Theirs or ours. I prefer to die free than to keep living imprisoned. And if we perish, humans will follow in our footsteps. The fae will follow in our footsteps. I believe in them, I believe that our teachings and hopes won’t die with us. Maybe the fruits of our rebellion won’t appear today, but they will one day, I’m sure of it."
Koitar turned to look at her lover, freed her hands from his, and held his face between them to give him a soft kiss. She was ready.
“Seutervoinen,” she started, voice wavering slightly. “It was thanks to you that we had the opportunity to achieve all we did. You freed me from my shackles, made me see the truth in my creator. You came back because you were worried about Nibelung, and it was this caring act that triggered our encounter. Our rebellion was born from love, and it’s love that will keep moving all of us. But this is not your war. You have an entire universe to record, a civilization to go back to, a real form waiting for you just outside. You can’t die here, I don’t want it. I don't want you to be punished for all the good you’ve done for us. This is my world, my fight, my Father, and I would die happily to make everyone free. But you don’t deserve the same fate. Please, go back to your world. You-”
Her voice died in her throat when Seutervoinen used her hands to dry the tears that Koitar didn’t know she was spilling. Her gaze looked as soft as ever, carrying more words that the angel could ever speak. A lonely tear also fell from one of his eyes, but Koitar thought she would collapse the moment she moved, so she let it fall down his face.
“My love…” They sighed, bringing her face down to put their foreheads together. “This became my world the moment I met you,” they whispered, “the humans are my people, and you are my wife. I don’t belong anywhere else. The fire inside your heart burns just as brightly inside mine. This world’s enemy is my enemy. Its war is my war, and I will see it through to the end. I understand your fears, but you deserve our punishment just as little as I do, and if you cannot flee, if the other angels cannot flee, if the humans cannot flee, then neither will I. I told you at the beginning, didn’t I? I’ll be your sword and your shield, and I will be with you until the end. My words are final.”
A sob escaped Koitar's mouth, and she let herself fall into her lover, hugging her as if she knew it would be the last chance they would have. Their mouths found each other, tasting the salt in each other’s lips, and whispering promises of eternity they knew they couldn't fulfill.
One day, their rebellion would bring back an ancient shadow, and the dragon and the voyager would finally reunite. One day, the moons would shatter. One day, the war between the sovereigns would tear the skies, and the fate the voyager foresaw a millennium ago would come to pass. Races would be cursed, civilizations would be destroyed, lands would be transformed forever. Nothing would change. But the people would never surrender. Humans would never stop fighting, would never let fate dictate their lives, would never allow the throne in the sky to watch over them in silence. And finally, one day, someone with the will to change everything would arrive, and finally, finally, all this generation did would come to fruition.
The two lovers, unknowingly sharing one of their last moments of peace, couldn't know any of that. But even if they did, even if the angel’s gaze could see that far into the future, it wouldn't change anything. They would still rally the angels and the dragons, they would still give their lives for their cause. Because they would always rather choose the hardship of freedom, than wear the comfort of chains.