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Not even 10 minutes after Miranda left, Andy felt that something might be wrong. She didn’t know what it was, but it made her anxious.
Throughout their relationship, Andy believed that she and Miranda were soulmates. She mentioned being able to feel the latter. To sense if something was wrong. Miranda indulged her, of course, she always did indulge Andy on her whims.
That was what made Andy worried.
Even after their divorce, there was still this connection between them. She felt it. She felt Miranda. She felt that the older woman was not okay, that she was suffering. That Andy had hurt her. But now—now, she can’t feel Miranda. It’s like the connection that they had was fading. Walking to the subway, she told herself that it was because of their talk. Because now, they’re finally over. She hoped for a second chance, but would fate reward those who throw away the good things that they had? Of course, not, Andy thought.
There are no second chances for those who can’t be content with what they were given.
She was one turn away from the subway when she heard it.
A loud crash.
It was no doubt a collision.
Worry shot through her. She told herself that it wasn’t Miranda. The older woman had left minutes ago, they’d have to be far from where Andy is now, probably back at Runway even.
Unconsciously, she walked towards where the sound came from. She didn’t need to get close to know how bad it was. Still, she walked, getting closer and closer.
See, one thing about Andy is that she never forgets things that she feels she needs to remember. That included passwords, phone numbers, and plate numbers.
When she got close, the first thing that she saw was the car—it’s front pressed to the front of the truck. There was smoke coming from the engine. With that much damage, she knew for sure that the driver was badly hurt.
But Andy found that she could not care less, because Miranda doesn’t drive. Not since then. So, if this was her car, she’d have to be sitting at the back.
She continued walking towards the back of the car. She needed to see. She needed to know if that really was Miranda’s car. She told herself that it wasn’t. The car was facing the direction where Andy came from. If this was Miranda’s, it would have to be facing the other way.
Still, she braced herself, wrapping her arms around herself. There, she saw it.
MPS-0313
Miranda.
She felt like crying. Or dying.
It felt like the air was leaving her lungs.
She remembered that night, when they got into an accident. She got news about Miranda before she was brought to the operating room. The doctor said she wasn’t waking up. That at her age, her body might not be able to cope with the damages caused by the accident.
She had almost lost Miranda then.
Andy remembered screaming at the doctors to fix her wife and let her live. Let her and Theo live. She almost forgot how much her wife—no, how much Miranda fought for her life, only for Andy to nearly kill her with that stupid engagement with the man she didn’t even love.
She walked over as they extracted Miranda’s body from the backseat. Unconscious and bloody. She was almost there, when somebody grabbed her by the arm, telling her that she wasn’t allowed near the scene.
“No! That’s my wife!” Andy screamed. But they weren’t listening. She felt arms wrap around her body, dragging her away from Miranda. Whoever it was that took her away from the love of her life, Andy wished nothing but hell upon them.
Through all her yelling, and the voices in her head, something rang out.
Maybe this was her karma, for hurting Miranda so much. Maybe this was fate’s way of telling her to go fuck herself. That she did this to the person she loved most.
She knew well of the things she did to deserve this. But Miranda—she didn’t deserve this. This can’t be what was planned for her. She was just a victim of Andy’s cruelty. Why her?
Her vision dimmed, and she couldn’t breathe. Maybe this was it for her, Andy thought. She would die screaming for her possibly dead ex-wife.
After a year of not believing in God, Andy prayed. “Please, not her. Not her and Theo both.” That was the last thing she remembered before it all went black.
Andy opened her eyes hazily. The first thing she noticed was Miranda’s absence, before the memory of the accident flooded into her mind.
Where is Miranda?
A doctor entered her room, telling her about Miranda’s status and her own need of surgery. He asked about allergies and Andy shook her head for every question that he asked.
She stopped hearing him after he told her about Miranda’s unconscious state, and the fact that her wife might not wake up.
“Please, do everything to save my wife. Save her and our son both. If you can’t save us all, choose to save her and our baby.”
The doctor nodded, briefly telling her to be strong before turning around to leave.
Bright lights. This had to be the most blatant fuck you of all time.
For the third time in the past 2 years she woke up to the glaring white lights of the hospital. She remembers what happened. She also remembered her talk with Andrea.
Andrea.
She had mentioned being able to feel Miranda despite being apart. She wondered if Andrea had felt it when her car collided with the truck. She didn’t know what got into her. It was over. The talk was a closure.
She didn’t know what made her tell her driver to turn around and drive back to the restaurant, hoping that Andrea would still be there.
There was that smell again. That awfully familiar scent that made Miranda want to curl up against herself and cry.
Maybe this was it. Maybe the universe was giving her one last drop of hope before she dies. But Miranda cannot die. Not when her bobbseys finally found it in their heart to forgive her. Not when things are getting better for her. Not when Andrea is no longer with that man.
Her consciousness didn’t last long, though. It was only a few moments before she felt the need to close her eyes again.
Andy sat by Miranda’s bed. It may not have been the wisest choice, but she couldn’t bring herself to leave the woman. She wished for the twins to not find out about what happened to their mother until she was in a better state.
The girls found out, though. They visited their mother whenever they could. Of course, because of their schedule, they could only visit an hour a day.
She prayed for her to come back.
She prayed and prayed and prayed. She prayed to everyone who would listen. To every God, to all the angels and the saints.
She held Miranda’s hand. Clasping it tight between hers, taking it up to her mouth every few minutes.
Miranda opened her eyes for a little while. She was glancing around, kicking her feet. The doctor told her it was out of her control. She can no longer control the movements of her own body. She was told that there was a chance Miranda would no longer wake up, that she had an internal hemorrhage. It was too small to be removed through surgery, but too big to be cured by antibiotics.
A week has passed since then. She never once left Miranda’s side. Andy didn’t eat, she found that she couldn’t. Not when Miranda is laying unconscious with the probability of not waking up.
She received news about Roy. He finally woke up. He was asking Andy about Miranda, but she couldn’t answer him.
Oh, Miranda.
Andy would never be able to tell her that she still loves her, too. That she never stopped. Not when she asked for a divorce. Not when she left. Hell, not even when she was engaged to a man.
“Please, wake up.” She whispered for the nth time. “You can’t die. You can hate me, but you can’t die. The girls will miss you. I will miss you, Miranda. I’ve spent so long missing you, and I don’t want to anymore. I love you, Miranda. So please, don’t die.”
She wanted to cry again, but her eyes were too dry. She spent the majority of the week crying by Miranda’s side.
Then, by some miracle, she felt Miranda’s hand move between hers.
“Miranda?” She stood up.
The older woman was gasping, only then did she remember about the tube in her love’s mouth. She screamed for the doctor.
“She woke up. Thank God, she woke up.” Is what she said when the doctor arrived.
They removed the tube that Miranda was choking on, replacing it with an oxygen mask before letting the woman breathe on her own.
Andy sat down beside her.
“Miranda?”
“Andrea.”
Tears stung in her eyes. How she longed for Miranda to say her name again. “You’re alive.” She sobbed out.
“I’m so sorry.”
A beat.
“I am so sorry for leaving you, for hurting you. I am so sorry for everything.” She cried, her face buried on the bed.
“Andrea—”
“I’m not asking you to forgive me—“
“Andrea.”
“I’m just glad that you’re alive. I will stay until you’re better, but until then, you don’t have to see me again.”
“Darling, what are you saying?”
“What?”
“I heard you, you know. When I was in a coma, I heard you. Everything you said.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“I already forgave you long ago, Andrea. I was never mad at you for leaving. So whatever it is you’re saying about me not having to see you again, why would I want that when all I ever want to do is to look at you?”
She took Andy’s hand.
“I love you, Andrea. I never stopped.”
“I love you, too, Miranda.” She wanted to say more, but she didn’t. Miranda noticed though, of course she did. “What is it, darling?”
She mumbled something Miranda clearly did not hear.
“Say again?”
“Can I–”
“Can you, what?”
“Can I kiss you?” Miranda chuckled. “You need not to ask.”
She leaned in, kissing Miranda softly but fiercely. She poured everything into the kiss. All the apologies she has yet to say, the i love yous she didn’t have the chance to utter, and the promise that she would never leave again.
They kissed like they didn’t need air.
They were both panting when they pulled away.
“Lay down with me? We will talk later.” Miranda asked through ragged breaths.
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t, love.”
“Are you sure?”
“I am.”
So, lay down with her, Andy did. She climbed up carefully, not wanting to hurt the older woman, before gathering her in her arms. She held her tightly, careful not to nudge any healing wounds.
“Miranda?” She whispered against the woman’s hair, tracing calming patterns on the Miranda’s shoulder.
“Hm?”
“Why did you turn back?”
“Turn back, where?”
“The car, why did you go back?”
“Oh.” Yeah. Oh.
She waited for Miranda to reply, telling her that it’s okay if she doesn’t wish to tell Andy about it.
“I was coming to get you back.”
“What?”
They were about to turn the corner when Miranda noticed the paper tucked into the seat beside hers.
She opened it slowly, and there on the front page it was.
“Senior Editor Andrea Sachs Called off Her Engagement with Fianceé Thomas Martin”
Her heart skipped a beat. She read through the article, a quote by Andrea catching her eye.
“I couldn’t be that selfish. I couldn’t let him [Martin] love me, when I knew to myself that I would never love him back. Not when I know that my heart still belongs to the person I left behind.”
She felt tears sprung from her eyes.
“Roy, turn around and go back to the restaurant. I need to talk to Andrea.”
It was a few blocks after they turned around when a truck hit them.
Miranda closed her eyes with the image of Andrea’s face etched in her mind.
“You got into an accident because of me?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Andrea. I got into an accident because I wanted to come to you. It was purely for my own desires.”
“But you wouldn’t have gotten into an accident if you didn’t turn back.”
“It was worth it, though.”
“Was it?”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Andy mumbled something about needing to call the twins, but Miranda thought they could wait. She agreed. Andy loved the twins, but she wanted to have Miranda to herself for a while.
They know they have a lot to talk about, but they finally have each other, and the talking can wait.
It didn’t take long before Miranda’s breathing evened out. She snuggled further into Andy’s side. She smiled, before closing her eyes and falling into a dreamless sleep. After all, what else could she possibly dream of?
She finally had everything she ever wanted, and now, she has no intentions of ever letting them go.