Chapter Text
After the loss in the semis of Unrivaled, Paige finally arrived at her hotel room. KK wanted them to go to some party she had heard of, but Paige was not in the mood. She told them to go without her, and they said they would see. She checked her messages and saw two from Azzi. She was on her way to the hotel. She had to leave the clothes with Ashanti, and she promised to be there soon. She was also not in the mood for a party, but that was nothing new when it came to Azzi. Paige found it funny and ironic in a way. The people’s princess didn’t really like people. Yes, she loved her circle of friends and their team, but she was not into crowds and parties. She would trade most of the parties for a quiet night with Paige or her book of the week…sometimes she loved those two together. At UCONN, you could find them in one of their rooms, cuddled up in bed with Azzi reading the book and Paige doing something on the iPad.
Paige took off her jacket and put her backpack on the floor in the corner of the room. She got her phone out and started replying to the messages she got. Then she went to check socials, and as expected, she saw a lot of negative comments about herself. You simply couldn’t please the people. If she took initiative and most of the shots, she was hogging the ball and being selfish. If she was making sure her teammates were in the right places for her to pass the ball, then she was passing too much and not taking shots. It was the same this evening. Many people online blamed her for the loss. From the comments, she was under the impression it was not 3 vs 3 but 1 vs 3. No matter what the ending of the game was, she was getting negative comments…and she found it tiring. People called her overrated again, said that she didn’t deserve the hype she got, and her mind went to that dark time and the ND game when her head was not in the right space. She remembered her teammates looking at her, feeling sorry for what the audience was saying… But most of all, she remembered Azzi’s face and that feeling of helplessness. She was injured, on the bench and all she wanted to do was get into that game and play with Paige and prove all of them wrong. Paige was one of the best, and he had done nothing for people to doubt it. Azzi had looked at her the same way that night. She knew Azzi would love to suit up and show them who Paige really was and how valuable she was for any team she plays for…but she couldn’t. Last time she was hurt, and this time it was not ‘’her’’ team. Azzi and her couldn’t show off each other’s brilliance anymore. There was always a small chance of doing it in the W, but Paige didn’t want to think about the draft and what that might mean.
When she put the phone away, she noticed Azzi in her UCONN hoodie and bottoms standing across from her, leaning on the wall.
‘’I didn’t hear you come.’’
Azzi smiled at her.
‘’I noticed… Your nose was in your phone. Texting some pretty girls.’’
Paige smirked. She knew Azzi was not jealous. She knew it was just teasing. She and Azzi had a very open and transparent relationship, in which she could give her phone to Azzi to read messages at any time of night or day. There was nothing that would put their relationship in ‘’danger’’. Some messages would make Azzi roll her eyes at the other girl, but nothing that could hurt them. Azzi knew people were sending Paige spicy photos and messages, but that was something that came with the "fame’’ they had. The only thing that mattered to her was that Paige told her about it all and very often showed her the messages or pictures. She never responded to things like that, and that was enough for Azzi. It was not her business what people were sending, but what Paige was doing about it. And since her girl did nothing, she was at peace. Paige knew how lucky she was to have Azzi, and she was not taking it for granted.
‘’Five of them.’’
‘’Five? Looks like you have plenty of time on your hands if you can text five girls. Too bad couch doesn’t give us that much spare time.’’
Paige smirked at the mention of Geno.
‘’Well, that is one of the perks of being a pro. You have plenty of time and have no breaks in playing because the pay sucks… You play in the W for change and get the money out of sponsorships and mama Huskies in Unrivaled.’’
‘’Ah, when you speak like that, I can’t wait to play in the W.’’
Paige mumbled…
‘’If there is a W next season.’’
‘’Hey! I want to play and be drafted.’’
Paige smiled at her and offered her hands. Azzi came to her and took them. P pulled her close and leaned her forehead to Azzi’s stomach.
‘’I want you to get drafted too. I need you…’’
Azzi got her hair out of the bun and played with it.
‘’Best back court in the country, baby…’’
She could feel Paige smile in her stomach.
‘’That, and I need you for my sanity.’’
Azzi kissed the top of her head.
‘’I know you won’t believe me, but I need you too. I know that on the surface, everything looks perfect. We are undefeated and all but I need you to P. You don’t know how much I need you there. Not just as a floor general, but to calm me. Sometimes all it took was for you to look at me and smile, and I would know I’ve got it and everything would be fine.’’
Paige just held her and listened. Azzi knew there was turmoil inside the blond, and she had no idea how to help. She also knew Paige would take time to ask for help or even admit she was not fine.
‘’Baby, I know you are not ok… I need you to tell me what you need. Even if it is something impossible. I need you to tell me.’’
‘’I need silence and to be away. I need my safety.’’
Azzi got worried.
‘’You are unsafe? Security was bad?’’
‘’No, nothing like that. We were all fine. But I am speaking of my mental safety. I am so tired, baby… I am so drained…’’
‘’When do you have to go back to Miami?’’
‘’I don’t. I cleared the apartment and sent my stuff to Dallas. Someone will be at the apartment for them. I am free until it is time for US basketball… I have about four days.’’
‘’Ok…’’
Azzi moved away from her and took her phone. She sent a few texts and turned to Paige.
‘’Are you packed?’’
‘’I haven’t unpacked much… Just stuff for basketball…’’
‘’Good, pack and we are going.’’
‘’Going where?’’
‘’You’ll see…’’
“And what about your family and our kids? I don’t want them to think I am a bad dad.’’
‘’There will be time for them… Now it is time for YOU.’’
Azzi packed the rest of Paige’s things and Paige couldn’t move from the bed. She was just watching the other girl in awe. Azzi got their things and room cards.
‘’Ready, baby?’’
‘’Ready, but terrified? Are you going to kill me in the woods?’’
Azzi started laughing and kissed the other girl.
‘’I am tempted, but no…’’
‘’Many serial killers say that to their victims. You are trying to get me to relax, and then I am gone.’’
‘’If I haven’t killed you in all these years, I will not do it tonight.’’
They left the room key on the reception desk and checked out of the hotel. Azzi texted some more people on the way to the car and Paige was trying to figure out what her girlfriend’s plan was. She had no idea, but part of her was excited for the unknown and adventure. It has been a long time since two of them did something this spontaneous.
Twenty minutes into their drive, Paige was sound asleep and Azzi was glad she would get some rest. On their way, Azzi made one stop to get coffee and some gas and Paige kept sleeping through it all. Since her girlfriend was in dreamland, Azzi decided to listen to one of her books. She chose crime and mystery to listen to. She was not sure if she could concentrate on listening to a smut book with Paige that close to her. She did have excellent self-control, but it has been some time since they were together and…well… the girl has needs. A few hours later, Azzi parked in front of her family's cottage and got out of the car. She put on her jacket and went around the car to open Paige’s door. She kissed her forehead and cheek and slowly started waking up Paige.
‘’Baby, wake up! We are here….’’
Paige opened her eyes, and it took her a minute to realize where she was. The cottage was in the dark, and the only light came from within the car. After her eyes adjusted, she was really surprised by where Azzi took her.
‘’Baby?’’
‘’You said you wanted to be somewhere safe…Well, this is one of the safest places there is… My family’s cottage and our attic were always places we both felt safe…’’
‘’God, I love you, Azzi!’’
‘’I love you too, Paige…’’
Azzi helped her with the bags and they got into the house. Heating was working so instead of an ice-cold house, they arrived to nice and warm place.
‘’You can leave your bags here. We can do your washing in the morning. I am sure some things need to get washed as soon as possible.’’
Paige just smiled.
‘’You know me…’’
‘’Unfortunately, I do.’’
‘’Hey!’’
‘’Let’s go upstairs to bed. We have plenty of time tomorrow to deal with laundry and shopping. There is some food at the house, but we would need some more…’’
‘’How many days do you have off, Az?’’
‘’Tomorrow and day after tomorrow… And then WE are going to practice and we are hanging out with the kids. I am done with being a single mother, Bueckers…’’
‘’You will miss them when you get to the W. I know I missed all of you.’’
Azzi came to her and hugged her.
‘’Let’s go to bed. It is very late and we should get some rest.’’
‘’Yes, you are right.’’
They went up to their bedroom and started getting ready for bed. Two years ago, they gave Azzi’s grandparents money to fix the attic for them. They had a lot of space there and it was like little studio apartment. They had a small kitchen, fridge, bed, TV and bathroom. Paige was getting her lenses out and Azzi was changing in the bedroom. She put on Paige’s old UCONN shirt with the number five on it and old sweats she stole years ago. She still had small braids on, but the rest of her hair was down. She came into the bathroom to brush her teeth and Paige just looked at her.
‘’What?’’
‘’Nothing…I just can’t believe I am here…that you drove me here…’’
‘’Did I do something wrong?’’
‘’No, baby… You did everything right. I will miss the finals of Unrivaled, but I think I am perfectly fine with it. I get to be with you and in the grand scale of things, that matters the most.’’
Azzi just smiled.
‘’I am glad you are here… ‘’
They finished in the bathroom and checked the house one more time. It did happen in the past that they were too tired to lock the door and now they always check before going to bed. Paige even got her to check the car again and she was right about it. She did leave them unlocked. After they locked the house, they went back to their room and got into bed. Paige had a huge smile on her face.
‘’Why are you smiling?’’
‘’Because this night was a crazy mix of perfect and horrible… We lost the game over stupid things and it made me so sad and angry…and then you were there with the kids and I was happy to see you all…and then we got here…and…and…I am going to bed with you…Not some hotel bed or random bed… I am going to OUR bed with you. Bed we chose and paid for together in the room we arranged for us…I think I am happy with how this night turned out.’’
‘’I am glad you are happy…’’
She pulled Azzi into her arms and the other girl cuddled up to her and put her head on Paige’s chest. Paige held her tight and stroked her back.
‘’I missed you baby… I missed all of you…all of this…’’
‘’We missed you too… KK talks about you all the time. She mentions you almost every five minutes… New kids listen to stories about you all the time and I can see they even miss you because everyone likes you and they can see from the stories that you were the backbone of this team. Yes, there is Paige persona people thirst over, but we got to know the real you. A person who gives so much love and support. Someone who wants us to work hard, but works harder than anyone else. You are really missed on the team. Yes, we are undefeated now and perfect scores are all over the board, but you are missed.’’
Paige had a proud parent smile.
‘’This team is amazing and I wish I could play a game or two with you… I miss this a lot…but most of all, I miss you.’’
‘’You have no idea how much I miss you every day… No place on campus doesn’t remind me of you in some way. First few weeks I was crying into chocolate mint ice cream because it was your favorite and I missed you.’’
‘’But you hate chocolate mint.’’
‘’I do…But I love you…and you love it…and I wanted to feel close to you. I sleep in your clothes or have something of yours with me all the time. I don’t wear the jewelry anymore because everybody was in our business with rings and letter pendants… So, I wore your small diamond cross or other things they’ve forgotten or didn’t know about. ‘’
‘’Do you want us to put the rings and necklaces back?’’
Azzi was quiet for a moment.
‘’No, I want something new…Something that was not tainted by the internet and conspiracy theories.’’
‘’In other words, my lady wants to be iced out…’’
‘’No, I am not saying that…’’
‘’So, no jewelry…’’
‘’I am not saying that either…’’
‘’And what are you saying?’’
‘’We need new meaningful jewelry…’’
‘’Anything in mind?’’
‘’I don’t know. I have to think about it…’’
‘’Ok princess. When you figure it out, tell me.’’
The lights were off and two of them finally fell asleep in each other’s arms. It was their favorite way to go to bed. Azzi’s hand was under Paige’s shirt on her stomach and Paige’s hand was in Azzi’s hair. Azzi fell asleep listening to her favorite sound, her girlfriend’s heartbeat and breathing. She knew they had only a few days to themselves, but she was happy they even had this chance to be together.
In the morning, Azzi woke up first. Paige was so sound asleep that she didn’t even feel Azzi get out of bed. Usually, she would wake up too and just protest her girlfriend leaving her alone. Azzi got downstairs and started the coffee. She opened Paige’s bags and started sorting things for washing. She made three piles and even added some of her things so she would have enough for each load. She bought same brand of softener that P used during college so her things would smell like Paige and now Paige’s things will smell again like ‘’home’’ as she called it. She turned her phone on and found a million messages from the Huskies, wondering why they broke up and if she was OK. She replied they were perfectly fine and that they just needed some space and time. KK sent her few pictures and TikTok videos where people claimed that P was partying last night and was seen with a few girls. Apparently, they broke up and P already had a new girl. She sent a picture of Paige sleeping with pin of Connecticut.
Mama: We are not broken up. She was not out clubbing. We went home straight from the hotel and P slept most of the way here. I do admit that the girl looks like her, but I can assure you, she is with me and not cheating or chatting up girls. Honestly, right now she is hugging my pillow and drooling…Not sexy at all…
P’s favorite Child 2: I am glad it was just a gossip. I saw your messages that you were not coming to the party and that you would explain everything when we see each other. Then we saw the pictures. I was scared for a moment…I know Buggers adores you, but girls are all over her and maybe you could have interpreted something the wrong way… And you are a liar, Fudd. You find her drooling ass sexy all the time…
Azzi smirked. Yes, KK was right… Even drooling Paige had some charm.
P’s favorite Child 2: When can we see her?
Mama: I will bring her to practice.
P’s favorite Child 2: Stop hogging my Boogers… I miss her too Azzi.
Mama: Leave us be KK. Mom and dad need some time alone. We deserved not to be interrupted by all of you pains in my ass. We haven’t had alone time in a very long time and unless you want to break out the earplugs, I think you should be happy we are away.
P’s favorite Child 2: Ugh! I didn’t need to know that.
Azzi put the phone away and started making food. She ate her cottage cheese with eggs. She wanted to make something for Paige, but she didn’t want the other girl to eat cold food. She ordered groceries online and waited for them to be delivered. She took her phone and finally found pictures, comments and videos of everything KK was telling her about. Yes, it looked like some girl who looks like P was at the party and now the internet was going crazy. Paige, who was sound asleep in her bed, was now the biggest villain for cheating on the people’s princess. Some were pretty sure they'd broken up a long time ago, and Azzi showed up just to rub it in. Lady D had revenge dress and Azzi had revenge fur. As the morning progressed, stories became more insane and phone calls started. Her brothers saw the pictures and called to check on her. She explained that it was not Paige and that they were together at the time of the party and they said they were sorry for them having to see all the horrible things written about them. Mom and dad called later just to check on them.
‘’How are you holding up? I am sure none of you is happy about this…’’
‘’Well, se is still asleep. She needed to rest and I would not go back to the bedroom to wake her up because of these stupid comments. We know the truth and that is enough. Also, whoever is really close to us, knows this is some stupid story. They made up so many things about us…’’
‘’I know but it is not easy.’’
‘’It is not, but mom, she is worth it…’’
She couldn’t see her mother’s smile, but she knew it was there.
‘’That is only thing that matters. You and her. If you are solid outside voices can’t hurt you.’’
That was not really true. Azzi was hurt, but not by Paige. She was hurt by the people who simply can’t let them be. She was hurt by people making up stories about them and she knows those things are hurting Paige. In eight years, they were together, Paige always took care of her. Sometimes it was the wrong and clumsy way, but there was no doubt in her mind that the other girl loved her just as much as Azzi loved her. This situation brought back some memories from three years ago.
Paige was close to coming back from her injury and she started going out with the team. She just took off her brace and was walking much better and Azzi was so happy for her. She was close to coming back and she knew how much it meant to Paige to be back and playing. Her doctors were predicting that she could start in her 23/24 season. It would be last year for Nika and Lilly and she wanted to play with them. Paige got as a present at one of her photo shoots blue shirts with small white flowers that became pretty popular on campus. It was not rare for Paige to show up in a shirt or top and a few days later to see the same clothes on other girls. Nika and Lilly organized an outing for the girls at Ted’s and the entire team was going. Last minute Azzi was not in the mood to go anywhere and Paige stayed with her. Their roommates teased them that they are old married couple, but they didn’t care. Even few hours without walking chaos their team is, was dream come true for the two. They needed that alone time without their roommates trying to enter the room or making too much noise calling them to ask something or whatever crisis they had at the moment; two of them were trying to be alone. As soon as they left the apartment, Azzi locked her bedroom door and they ended up in bed, finally making love in absolute peace and without fear of someone interrupting. They fell asleep holding each other and very happy. The following mornings there were pictures of blond girl in ‘’Paige’s’’ shirt kissing another blond girl. Since their relationship was a secret, it was more a matter of whether Paige is gay? Rather than, is she cheating on Azzi? Girl in the photos had the same shade of blond hair as Paige, but her hair was a bit shorter. If Azzi didn’t know Paige was with her the whole night, she might have wondered if it was her. Now they are in the same situation. Someone who looks like P had a good night and many people are on P’s case for it.
She was taken back out of her loud thinking by her mother’s voice.
‘’Azzi, are you listening to me?’’
‘’Yes, yes, I’ll see you tomorrow.’’
‘’Yes, your father, grandparents and I will be there around dinner time.’’
‘’I can’t wait for you to come. I think she needs some family time.’’
‘’I am sure she does. Don’t worry. We will spoil our girl rotten.’’
Azzi smiled. She knew her parents and grandparents saw Paige as family so she would be spoiled. She was sure her grandmother would insist they come back earlier so she could cook for Paige.
She went back to her book and then her phone was ringing again. It was Phee. She answered and saw Phee and Stewie on the screen.
‘’Hey mama Huskies, to what do I owe this call?’’
‘’Well, you disappeared in the middle of the night with P… We wanted to check on you.’’
‘’Well, we are fine. Paige is still out. I am guessing she needs some rest and to unwind. And I am fine too. I am sorry she is missing the finals. I know she wanted to be there, but I think she needs this more.’’
Stewie nodded in agreement.
‘’Maybe some time alone and together will help her a bit. She did look tired in the end. You know P. She is taking care of everyone and not letting anyone take care of her.’’
‘’Yes, that is Paige for you. She slept during the entire ride from the hotel to my family cottage.’’
‘’Tell her we miss her and we love her very much…’’
‘’I will…’’
Phee smiled at Azzi.
‘’Take care of your girl and yourself too.’’
‘’I will try my best.’’
‘’I saw the stuff online.’’
Azzi’s smile was gone and two older women had a sad look in their eyes.
‘’Do you want to talk about it?’’
‘’It is not the first time… There is not much to talk about. It is not true, and we both know it.’’
‘’I am sorry for what is happening.’’
‘’Don’t worry, Phee. I guess that is the price of dating her. As long as we are honest and working on ourselves, I don’t care what others say or do.’’
‘’Good for you… Ok, we are leaving you now, and if you need anything, even a care package, just call us.’’
‘’I will… Thank you…’’
‘’Don’t worry about it. You are family…’’
Azzi smiled.
‘’Oh, and tell Paige that Mila misses her too and wants her candy and hugs.’’
‘’I will pass the message from baby Phee…’’
‘’Stop calling her that. She has a name…’’
‘’She might have but your family is now Mr. Phee and baby Phee…’’
‘’My husband actually likes his nickname.’’
‘’That is so cool. I really like him. He is very cool and one of the rare ones.’’
‘’Yes, he is.’’
After finishing the conversation, it was time to put the next load into the dryer and fold what was in it before. She loved folding THEIR laundry. She could see herself drafted to Dallas and doing it all again with Paige. Her gut feeling was telling her that she would be drafted and reunited with her girl, but she didn’t want to hope and be disappointed. She will let herself dream on the day the team is announced. When she gets her contract, she will relax and let herself enjoy being with P again.
She was in the middle of folding the clothes when she heard Paige coming down the stairs. She was glad Paige had some nice sleep and rest she needed.
‘’I am sorry Az…’’
‘’What happened?’’
‘’I saw the messages in the group and pictures online…’’
‘’Ah…’’
‘’Are you ok?’’
‘’Why wouldn’t I be?’’
‘’They wrote a lot of bad things...’’
‘’That we know are lies.’’
‘’Still… I don’t like it.’’
‘’Me neither, but I don’t care about the outside noise. I know we are good and that you are with me.’’
‘’And there will be days when I am not with you.’’
‘’There will be, but I chose to believe in you and us.’’
She kissed Paige and laced their fingers.
‘’ I don’t want to insult either of us, thinking that we would be disrespectful toward one another and our relationship. I know that people can fall for someone else and that is hard, but part of life. But I want to believe that you would not cheat on me.’’
‘’No, I wouldn’t. I love YOU. I am with YOU and I am not interested in other people…’’
‘’I know.’’
‘’Good…’’
‘’Now, are we going to keep talking about this nonsense or are you going to give me my morning, well, afternoon kiss now?’’
Paige smiled and pulled the other girl into a kiss.
‘’Good morning, my love…’’
‘’Good afternoon, P.’’
‘’What do you want to do Az?’’
‘’Just be with you… We didn’t have a day just for us in a very long time.’’
‘’Ok, and what does that mean?’’
‘’Well, I can feed you… We can watch some show…and then…we can figure out the rest. Do you want to go for lunch somewhere, or do you want me to cook?’’
‘’Maybe I could treat you to a nice lunch.’’
‘’I think we could go out.’’
They changed and went to one of their favorite pizza places. It was about forty minutes away from the campus and they knew most of their teammates were too lazy to drive this far from campus. It would give them some alone time since there was no privacy for them. The only privacy they had was a cottage, and often it was not an option since Azzi’s grandparents spent a lot of time there during the season. The staff was happy to see them and they even brought them slice of chocolate and white chocolate cakes on the house. They told Paige that they were following her career out of UCONN and that they are very proud of her. Azzi noticed how those simple words made Paige smile, this time smile with her eyes too. Since the restaurant was not busy, entire staff came to take pictures with them. Having Paige and Azzi in the restaurant was celebrity sighting they were very proud of. One of the cooks told Paige that her granddaughter started playing basketball after seeing her play at UCONN and she thanked her for being such a good role model. Paige thanked them all for such a warm welcome and words. She signed one of the menus and everything they gave her. Azzi did the same and she was pretty sure that next time she comes here, that menu will be framed and, on the wall, maybe even the picture of them would find its way to the wall. After lunch they took a walk and few pictures along the way. It was nice just to wander the streets with Azzi without thinking about anything other than her. Azzi deserved to be spoiled by her and Paige was already thinking what she could do for the other girl. Azzi loved nice gifts, but if Paige was being honest, her girl was more about the gesture than the price of the gift. Azzi loved the intent behind what she was getting. If your intentions were right, she would be happy with a toy or plastic ring pop… That made things very easy and difficult for Paige and anyone getting gifts for Azzi. It took P a minute to learn how to give proper gifts to the other girl and once she learned, there was no better gift giver than her. Azzi was on the call, so Paige entered the store by herself. She finally got an idea what to do for Azzi and other girl being too distracted came in handy for Paige. She had her backpack so she could hide everything away from Azzi. She got few things to distract her from what was real gift. When she got out, Azzi just saw bottle of chocolate milk Paige loved and a lot of gummy candy Azzi hoped Paige would eventually grow out of. Paige saw the way Azzi looked at the bag.
‘’It’s for the kids… When we go to campus…’’
‘’So, you will leave me with high on sugar kids and you will go to training camp?’’
‘’Well, I will be with you and the kids for a few days…’’
‘’Then we can suffer hyper KK together…’’
‘’And Fish…’’
‘’At least NOW she will not be in my bed.’’
‘’She is in your bed?’’
‘’Don’t ask…’’
‘’The less I know, the better I feel…’’
‘’Baby, when we get home, I have to get on a call with people from Madison Reed, and it will take an hour. It is for my internship. We have a late meeting because some people were out of town.’’
‘’Ok. I will be in the bedroom upstairs just chilling with my iPad.’’
‘’Sometimes I am very jealous of that thing.’’
‘’No reason to be… It is full of your pictures, videos, and messages.’’
‘’It better be.’’
Paige drove them back and after they took off their jackets, Paige kissed Azzi and went upstairs. It was time for her little plan. Azzi took a seat at the dining room table and started her meeting not having an idea of the surprise her girlfriend is making for her.
Upstairs Paige opened her bag and put a bottle of champagne in the refrigerator. She got chocolate-covered strawberries on the plate and put them in too. She opened the bag with about hundred pink and purple heart-shaped balloons and started blowing them. She didn’t need all of them, but at least half of them would do. She remembered they had small pump that they used for Azzi’s grandma’s birthday, and she got it out of the boys’ room to help hurry the process. She found in the bathroom box of Azzi’s favorite bath salts and put them beside the tub. From the back of the bathroom closet, she got big bowls where lavender candles were. She and Azzi got them last summer and forgot about them. They remembered them when they were in Dallas on the Target run. Paige put that in her phone notes, and now she knew where they were. Everything was ready now for their little romantic night. She felt a bid guilty they just went to bed last night, and that Azzi had to take care of her all day and night. Now it was her turn to take care of her girl and make it up to her. Unfortunately, not living in the same state and being hours away even by plane made their time together mostly about sex. They did agree not to break up and to do everything in their power to see one another even for a few days if they had a chance. There were few sweet escapes they managed to keep a secret from the forever hungry internet and they were very proud of themselves, but it usually meant they were inside and spending those two days talking and having more sex than ever, because they didn’t have much time. Now, P didn’t want to rush things. She wanted them to have a slow and sensual night…night they didn’t get many chances to have since she left UCONN.
Last part of P’s surprise were notes. She got different color post it notes and a big plastic jar that Azzi would put them in at the end. She wrote them and put them all over the room. Then she took a moment and checked the secret compartment of her backpack. It was still there. In all this chaos, her lucky charm was there. She had it for over a year and maybe it was time to part ways with it. She sneaked down to see if Azzi’s meeting was over. She found her sitting at the table and taking off her headphones.
‘’Hey, baby… Miss me?’’
‘’Always… What sort of question is that Az?’’
Azzi got up and came to her. She kissed her and narrowed her eyes.
‘’You are up to no good…’’
‘’When it comes to you…’’
‘’Oh, ok…I see…’’
‘’Give me ten minutes and then come upstairs.’’
‘’Paige…’’
‘’Ten minutes…’’
And with that she went back upstairs to light the candles in the bathroom and fill the tub. She turned off the big lights and turned on the fairy lights they got few years ago. Room looked like it was in a cluster of stars and Paige knew Azzi would love it. She was a sucker for romance and Paige was sucker for her and would do anything to see Azzi smile or make her happy cry.
Azzi was very impatient, but she wanted to wait those ten minutes because she knew that Paige had made an effort to do something for her. She loved the surprises Paige made for her and they always showed her how loved and understood she was. Since they became friends and later started dating, Paige never dropped the ball with presents and surprises. Sometimes it was just a bunch of flowers she picked for Azzi along the way and sometimes it was something unexpected like diamond earrings or a necklace with the number 40 on it. Everyone was confused by it, but she understood that 35+5 was 40. It was a thoughtful present and not as obvious as just 5 would be. She saw online someone speculating that it was present from one of the boys from the basketball team, then that it was from one of the football guys…everyone but Paige…and she would see Paige proudly smirking at the fact that no one knew it was from her and about them.
She gave P more than ten minutes before she climbed the stairs and opened the door of their room. First thing she saw were fairy lights and heart-shaped balloons on the floor. She entered the room and saw a lot of Post-it notes all over the room. She smiled and took the closest one.
''Every morning before I wake up, I look for you in my bed…always…My hand just goes to the place where you are supposed to be. Instead of your warm body, I often find cold and empty space. I am so excited for the chance to wake up to you every morning''.
Azzi could relate to this. She often does the same. Since she got into college, they’ve spent very few nights separated. Even when many believed they were just friends. Paige and Azzi rarely went to bed apart. So, Paige leaving college and living so far was big adjustment to both of them.
''You still make me nervous when we are going on a date''
She had no idea that the nonchalant final boss was nervous after eight years together.
''Butterflies…always when I see you play… It will never get old.''
She could relate to this. She also felt it when she was watching Paige play. In high school, in college, W, Unrivaled…always.
''Sometimes I pretend that I am watching something on my iPad so I could watch you read your book and don’t seem weird''
She knew about this. She caught Paige staring at her so many times. She found it cute…
''I always cry in the car after driving you to the airport...''
She cried too… Every time they had to say goodbye… Ever since US basketball, she always cried when they said goodbye.
''I wish I had superpowers so I could see you when I miss you. And I miss you all the time.''
She wished for it too…
''I never travel without your Lily soap. It makes me miss you less...''
Azzi had a small bottle of Paige’s favorite perfume with her all the time for when she misses Paige. Sometimes she would spray the pillow beside her so it would smell like Paige. She believed she sleeps better like that.
''On my draft night, you were so beautiful that you took my breath away. I wished I could stop time then and there and just live at that moment…National champion with my MOP girl..''
Azzi wished for it too. It was their first night of ‘’freedom’’. Paige was out of college and they didn’t have to hide anymore. Being together at the draft was not really coming out; it was more like ‘’testing the waters’’, but many people knew why she was at the table and walking the carpet with P.
''I am who I am because of you. You make me a better person just by loving me.''
That one made her happy and sad. She didn’t want Paige to think her goodness had to do anything with being with Azzi. Azzi knew Paige was good even before they were friends and dating. Yes, she was annoying, she still is, but she was never a bad person. She cares too much about people to be bad.
''I never miss your game, even when I can’t be there to watch you do it in person. I am always with you, baby…''
She knew this. Paige would always send her a message pretty much seconds after the buzzer. She would congratulate her on the win and tell her she was proud, and she missed playing with the girls. One night, Paige got a bit drunk with her Dallas girls and wrote to her that she missed playing with the team because she missed winning. It made Azzi a bit sad. Paige was used to winning and having a team she can rely on. In Dallas, their wins were pretty much a miracle and so rare that Paige always looked surprised they won.
There were a million small notes all over the room and Azzi collected each of them. She read all of them and put them aside. She opened the bathroom door and found Paige sitting on the edge of the tub, putting away one of the candles. Paige smiled at her…
‘’What is all this baby?’’
‘’This is me spoiling you… Yesterday was about my shitty year and now I want to celebrate with you your amazing season and all that you accomplished… I am so proud of you baby… You deserve to be celebrated, and I will do it now…I am sorry I didn’t do this last night. I don’t want you to think I don’t see you or don’t see everything you’ve done. I see you, baby, and I am so proud of you. ‘’
Azzi smiled…
‘’Baby, I know you see me. You show it all the time. One night you were down and needed something doesn’t mean you don’t see or appreciate me. I know you PB, and I know us. It is perfectly fine to have the night we had.’’
Paige just nodded but it was clear she felt a bit guilty. Azzi started taking off her clothes, and that got Paige’s attention. She was not sulking anymore. Azzi got into the tub and smiled at the other girl.
‘’Join me?’’
‘’Your wish is my command, princess…’’
They got comfortable in the tub. Azzi, leaning on Paige’s chest wrapped up in her favorite embrace, just enjoying the silence and smell of candles.
‘’Paige…’’
‘’Yes?’’
‘’Tell me a secret… Something that happened in college and you never told me…something important. Something you thought I would never understand.’’
It took a minute for Paige to think of the secret she was willing to share… In all honesty, just two secrets were fitting THAT description.
‘’Hm… I was ready to walk away from basketball just to be with you…’’
Azzi moved away from her in complete shock.
‘’What?!’’
‘’I was ready to do it.’’
‘’Night before we came out to CD and Geno…I couldn’t sleep. I was so scared and nervous. I had no idea what to say and how it would go. Everybody knows how he can react… I was scared that one of us would have to stop playing…or both of us… I was so scared for how would my life look without basketball…and then I realized that no one can take the game away from me. Yes, he could take me off the team, but I still had the love of the game and skill. I could live without playing for the Huskies, but I couldn’t live without you. So, I was ready to walk away from basketball just to be with you…’’
Even after the explanation, Azzi’s shock was evident.
‘’But you love the game.’’
‘’I love you more… I’ve always loved you more…And I loved the game because I shared it with you. Yes, we didn’t get to play a lot in college due to injuries we both had…but we trained together. We worked hard in the offseasons with your mom and dad, Steff, all the people we got to work with…we did it together…So, for me, part of my game will always be you. I agree that we are two separate people and that there is a chance that you would be drafted somewhere else…but if I could, I would play with you for the entirety of my career.’’
‘’You know that is almost impossible.’’
‘’Baby, we were told that so many things we did were impossible. I would never bet against us.’’
‘’I will take your delulu for the night…So, what? We live in Dallas forever?’’
‘’No, not forever…Until it is time to go home…’’
‘’Home?’’
‘’Yes. You and I and Phee…playing for the Lynx…Imagine that. Huskies winning the championship together again…’’
‘’Ah, that…Your dream of being part of that team…’’
‘’I grew up watching them…’’
‘’And what about Mystics? They are my home team…’’
‘’I guess we can be there for a season or two…’’
‘’But our perfect spot is Lynx?’’
‘’I don’t know. Maybe they make a team in some city we would love more.’’
‘’And what about Sparks or Valkyries? After all this time in Connecticut, I would kill for some sun and warm weather.’’
‘’I do look good in purple…And I would never object to you in a bikini.’’
‘’Well, from what I remember, someone else here looks hot in a bikini too.’’
‘’Bro, I am done with bikinis.’’
‘’Even if I ask you…’’
She pulled Azzi even closer.
‘’Just for you and no one else… Maybe at our house pool when we are alone.’’
‘’It is a pleasure doing business with you…’’
They kissed and Paige pulled her closer.
‘’I don’t care where I play as long as I have you by my side…’’
‘’Ok, one final question Bueckers…’’
‘’I am listening…’’
‘’Will you finally take me to bed?’’
‘’Bold question princess… I guess there is only one way to find out…’’
Paige wiggled her way out of the tub and wiped herself with a towel. She helped Azzi with hers and started blowing the candles…
‘’I want you too… but it would be nice not to burn your cottage.’’
‘’I find it very sexy when you are a responsible adult.’’
‘’No! Not the ‘’a’’ word.’’
‘’Shut up!’’
They blew the candles and let the water out of the tub. Paige took her hand and led her to bed.
‘’Now that we prevented possible flood and fire, we can finally go back to us and our night…well, your night…’’
Being back in bed and this time with every intention not to sleep made them both very nervous and excited. There was a shift in the air none of them could really understand.
They missed one another very much, but they didn’t feel rushed. They simply took their time with one another and made love like they had all the time in the world, like this night would never end and they existed here and now, with no tomorrow around the corner. Paige was happy. She held, kissed and enjoyed closeness of her favorite person in the world. Azzi was on her side, cuddled up to Paige and she couldn’t stop looking at her. Yes, she was beautiful and baller, but that was not first thing on Paige’s mind when it came to Azzi. First thing was ‘’my ride or die.’’ Azzi was there…there for it all. Since they were sixteen, Azzi was part of her life and became integral part of it. Azzi knew her better than anyone. She knew what she needed before she ever said it. Azzi was there when she was injured. She sat and cried with her when she had bad days and found ways to push her when she needed it. And she was also there for the good days and always stood by her. Just as she did for Azzi. When they were injured at the same time, they spent most of their time together. Azzi was her world for such a long time and just looking at her Paige realized she wanted more. More of Azzi, more of their lives being intertwined, she wanted everything with her.
‘’What is it P?’’
‘’Nothing…’’
‘’That is not true… I know that look… Something is on your mind…’’
Paige smiled…
‘’Ride or die…’’
‘’What?’’
‘’You… You are my ride or die… I just realized that we have been there for the best and the worst in our lives and we are still here. You are my Wonder Woman Fudd… I really respect, love and admire you. This year I was your favorite player in the W. Next year you are going to be mine and I am going to be hyping you all the time.’’
‘’What if we end up on the same team?’’
‘’Well, then I get to be the WAG in the tunnel… Your jersey or shirt…’’
Suddenly, she got out of bed and went to the fridge. She got the strawberries and champagne out and got them to bed.
‘’Baby, what is that?’’
‘’That is a little something to celebrate you, my love…’’
‘’Me?’’
‘’Yes, you…’’
She was happy to celebrate Azzi for a fantastic season, new brand deals, new podcast that was getting bigger and bigger each week. She was celebrating her healthy season, last year at UCONN, and someone who can be part of the team that wins a second National title. She was not jealous of Azzi and how her college career was getting close to its conclusion. She was sad she couldn’t be there more.
She popped the bottle and offered it to Azzi.
‘’ I don’t have glasses. I guess we have to share…’’
‘’This is hot. Expensive champagne, strawberries dipped in chocolate and naked Paige Bueckers in my bed… Wow! Many would kill for this experience.’’
‘’Many would, but you are the only one getting it. I can promise you that… I want you to be the only one to…EVER…get this experience.’’
Paige fed her the strawberry and it took a moment for Azzi to process what Paige just said.
‘’Ever?’’
‘’Yes, ever… I know that there is this idea of me being a flirt or a rizz master… But we know that is not true. That is what people want to see. I will not apologize for having charisma and presence. I will not make myself small for anyone…but with that being said…I know what I want in life…and who I want it with.’’
‘’Paige…’’
‘’I want YOU… In every vision I had of my future, you were there… Me going to UCONN, I saw you coming the following year, me in the W I want you with me on the team. I don’t want to do this without you…even if we end up on different teams. I don’t want to do my life without you…’’
Azzi kissed her and they were kissing until they realized they had to stop for air.
‘’Do you remember your first UCONN party?’’
Azzi blushed…
‘’Don’t remind me. It was the first time I got drunk. I don’t remember much. I remember you carrying me home and me singing all the time.’’
‘’Yes, you were singing in my ear…off key, very loud…’’
‘’Don’t remind me.’’
‘’I think that was the night I realized I wanted to do this with you for a long run.’’
‘’Me being drunk?’’
‘’Yes, you are cute drunk.’’
‘’Oh, God!’’
‘’When I got you into my room, you took my hand and put it on your belly. You said your love lives there because I make you feel things in your stomach… and that you don’t want that feeling to stop. You also spoke of the butterflies you feel when I smile at you and that it is not fair.’’
‘’What?’’
‘’I never got the answer to that. You just said that you wanted to sleep and that I should get into bed and hold you because you say so.’’
‘’That does sound like me.’’
‘’Mhm…’’
She put her hand into her backpack and got the small black box out of it.
‘’I got into bed with you and you were silent for a moment and then told me that when I propose to you, you don’t want some grand gesture. You want it to be just us and no one else. You prohibited proposals on big tournament nights and the draft because you don’t want it to happen in front of the world. You said you have to share me enough with the world for it to have that moment of us.’’
Azzi noticed the box in Paige’s hand and just looked at it in shock.
‘’Paige…’’
Paige smiled at her…
‘’It is not what you think… Don’t freak out.’’
She opened the box and inside was crumpled, folded paper.
‘’What is that?’’
‘’My Buckets’ list…’’
‘’You mean bucket list…’’
‘’Well, I am Paige Buckets and then it is Buckets’ list.’’
Azzi just rolled her eyes at Paige.
‘’Can I?’’
‘’Yes, you can.’’
She opened the paper and noticed that the date on it was somewhere in 2018. She started reading
• Winning State championship at Hopkins
• More gold medals
• More Lynx merch
• New phone
• UCONN
• Entire summer with Azzi and the Fudds
• Medal at Youth Olympics at 3x3
• Winning the World Cup and MVP
• Championship at UCONN
• Azzi is coming to UCONN and the championship with her
• Meeting UCONN alumni
• Having a good run at college
• Being no 1 at WNBA draft
• Playing with Azzi in Spain during the off-season
• Good rookie contract
• Seeing my friends and family often
• Eloping with Azzi
Azzi kept looking at the paper and then back at Paige.
‘’You really put all that on your list in 2018?’’
‘’Yes, I made it then.’’
There was a small smile on her lips.
‘’Wow, Bueckers…You’ve done most of the things on the list.’’
‘’Yes, there are a few that are missing.’’
‘’Like what?’’
‘’Spain and eloping…’’
Azzi just looked at her, surprised.
‘’Well, honestly, that rookie contract, too. This sucks… I was hoping that by the time I get to the Ligue, money would be better. Everyone and their mama know we deserve it.’’
‘’That is true. We deserve more than we get, and it makes me angry that there are still people denying us that we managed to grow the sport and visibility to the level when people know who you are, who CC, Angel and many others are… A lot of women currently playing and before gave visibility to the sport…’’
Paige was silent for a moment, and Azzi noticed.
‘’What is it, P?’’
‘’Are you angry we are not more out there? That we are private with our relationship…’’
‘’No, I am not.’’
‘’But if we were more public, people would know it was not me in Miami…’’
‘’And they would be more in our business. I don’t need that and I know neither do you. Being more public and showing people more of us, gives them more ammunition to use against us. Why are they not holding hands? Why hold pinkies? She never hugs her… They don’t kiss like this or that couple… We don’t need that. I don’t want to be anyone else, I want to be me and want you to be you…comfortable in our relationship and life.’’
‘’I just need to know if you want things to change.’’
‘’I know they will…and I accepted that. I don’t want to force that change. We kept our relationship private for so long that I feel a bit clumsy about how to share it. What is enough?’’
‘’I think it is up to us. We don’t have to follow anyone’s footsteps. We can make a blueprint for this relationship based on what we are comfortable sharing. It can be our two cups of coffee in the morning with a cute caption…or a picture from the bed right now.’’
Azzi just looked at her.
‘’I am joking. I know none of us would be comfortable with that…and CD would kill us both…’’
Now, Azzi was laughing.
‘’I can imagine that phone call and her face when she sees us.’’
‘’I think that something small and meaningful is enough for us and for people who care. I know there are a lot of people who would love the bedroom content, but it is not us. It will never be us, not because I am ashamed, but because I respect you and love you so much to never expose you in such a way. There is some level of intimacy that should be just ours…and that is where I draw the line. Intimacy is just ours…’’
Azzi cuddled up to Paige and was quiet for a moment before she lifted her head and had a mischievous smile on her face.
‘’So, no sex tape in our future…’’
‘’Azzi!’’
‘’What, just checking… If our injuries end our career early, we definitely have a future in that branch of the entertainment business…’’
‘’Bro…’’
‘’I know… It was just a joke…’’
‘’Bad one… and don’t jinx us with injuries… I think we’ve had enough for a long time.’’
‘’Yes, I can agree with that.’’
It was three in the morning when Azzi took her hand and led her to the bathroom.
‘’We should have a quick shower and dress before we are woken up by my family.’’
‘’You said tomorrow afternoon.’’
‘’I did…they did, but I know my grandmother will want to cook for you and you know that when she spoils you it is an all-day event.’’
There was small smile on Paige’s face. Azzi’s grandmother really loved to spoil her and would make her all the things she loves. She couldn’t wait to see what was on the menu tomorrow. She was pretty sure some mac and cheese would be there. She was not sure if it would be dinner or lunch, but she knew it would definitely be made for her.
They took a quick shower and Paige took care of the lights, rest of the strawberries and the bottle of champagne. She didn’t want the family to know they’ve been drinking. Yes, they were both of age and both set of parents already saw them drinking on the draft night, but they didn’t need them to see it at home. For some reason, they were ashamed to drink in front of the parents. She turned on her bedside light and waited for Azzi to finish getting dressed. She was a princess for a reason. She reapplied her face cream, put on her bonnet, and checked herself in the mirror to see if there was something to cover up. She and Paige missed each other a lot and there was always a chance they got carried away and leave a trace on the skin of the other one. This time, she was safe. Paige was careful but she was not sure for herself. She made a mental note to check Paige when she gets into bed. Sitting in bed, Paige could see that Azzi’s routine is a bit slower than usual. She could see that she wat thinking about something and that it was something that was really on her mind. She cuddled up to Paige and they were almost asleep when Azzi mumbled.
‘’We can’t elope. Our families and team would kill us.’’