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Money may not be able to buy happiness but it can sure buy a penthouse with an expensive view of Manhattan. This is the first time Mike has seen it during the sunset. All the other times he has set foot in Harvey’s apartment were either late at night or early in the morning before work, usually carrying a breakthrough or an emotional realisation for which he needs his mentor’s validation.
Tonight is different. Tonight, the two lawyers have wrapped up a case early, for once. Donna almost threw them out the building, ordering them to get some sleep and forbidding them from coming back to the office until the morning. In a rare bout of affection, Harvey had offered drinks. Furthermore, the lawyer had offered his apartment to shower, saying Mike’s was too far away and that he wasn’t in the mood to wait for him.
The front door hasn’t opened since. Mike is sitting in Harvey’s expensive couch facing the floor-to-ceiling windows with his hair still damp from the shower. The other man is in the armchair, glass of scotch in hand, staring at nothing. The item he is holding is the only familiar thing about him because Harvey is wearing comfortable clothing, obviously made to lounge at home without losing the feeling of wearing something expensive. “On second thought, maybe it’s not that bizarre,” Mike thinks.
They have been in silence for a while, ever since Harvey offered him a drink. They are simply watching the sunset, not visible from the office at the firm. The familiar sounds of New York reach them muffled, either from the distance or because of good insulation, or both. Either way, it creates a feeling of surrealness that overwhelms Mike even better than alcohol. For once, he feels at peace. He is comfortable, both physically and emotionally. Harvey exasperates him like no one else but he also brings with him a sense of security that calms Mike’s permanently frazzled nerves.
- You should leave.
Harvey’s words feel like a bucket of ice-water dumped over him. The lawyer refocuses his eyes and looks at the other man with apparent confusion written all over his face. It’s dark already. The apartment is barely lit anymore now that the sun has gone down. The evening has turned into night and neither man knows how long they have been sitting there, enjoying the silence.
Mike tries to look at Harvey, to really look and see if he can decipher the meaning behind his words. The thing is that the lawyer never actually says what he’s really thinking. The best closer in New York can’t afford to have personal opinions. The lawyer says what he must, no matter who he’s talking to. Mike likes to think Donna and him are the exception; they have met the real Harvey beneath the suit. This, right here, is not him.
- What, is your apartment starting to smell like poor? Tough luck. I’m comfy. You’ll have to deal with me for a couple more hours.
- Mike – he says, his tone low and dangerous – You need to leave.
- Dude, you invited me! That whole “let’s shower at my place” was a ruse and I saw through your tricks.
- First off, don’t call me dude. Secondly, there was no ruse. It was a practical matter. Lastly, I’ve had enough of you at my place. Scram.
Something about the way he sat in his couch, looking so relaxed and at home, has broken Harvey. No longer able to keep his cool, the only choice is to kick him out and gather his thoughts in time for tomorrow morning, where they go back to being coworkers. That, he knows how to do. It’s easier than this. He doesn’t trust himself when Mike is close.
He breathes a sigh of relief when he stands up and puts the blanket that was on his lap back on the couch. Mike even takes a couple of steps in the direction of the kitchen, where they left their jackets and shoes when they came in hours ago. Then the other man has to run a hand through his hair, trying to organise his thoughts, and a pull of attraction, low in his gut, almost makes him whimper. So, he opens his mouth again.
- In fact, why don’t you take the day off tomorrow? I have a couple of errands I need to run, anyway. I won’t be in the office much – says Harvey, trying to keep his tone of voice casual.
From the look Mike gives him, it seems that framing as a favour doesn’t work. In fact, Mike looks angrier now. The lawyer has noticed the tension in his voice, as well as the force with which he is hanging onto the empty glass in his hand. He also knows that the man has followed him to the kitchen to pressure him into leaving; he does that to annoying clients, he backs them into the door until they are already outside and getting escorted to the elevators by Donna.
- I thought you knew better than this – answers Mike.
- I don’t know what you’re talking about – Harvey responds, lying through his teeth.
- Come on, you can’t treat me like a wannabe CEO who just wants the name Harvey Specter on his legal team. I know your tricks.
- You don’t know jack shit – hisses Harvey.
- Don’t I?
The smirk in Mike’s lips when he says that ignites a dangerous fire in Harvey. A mix of lust and rage fuels his next words.
- You know what? When I risked my career for you, I expected a bit more appreciation.
- Liar! You never wanted someone to kiss your ass. You wanted me because I’m you.
- Because you’re me? Why would I want that?
Against his will, hatred seeps through his last words. Mike’s value is not how similar he is to himself; it never has been. It’s precisely the opposite. It’s how much he cares, how much he helps, how unapologetic he is about his beliefs and about his feelings. He is all Harvey never has been and never will be.
- Mike, leave.
Those words break the pregnant silence when he cannot take it anymore.
- No, Harvey, shut up.
- Excuse me? – he asks, trying to keep his bravado up and utterly failing.
Mike grabs him by the face and presses his lips with Harvey's. The glass of whiskey that he takes out his hand and puts on the counter slides right over to the other side and shatters into a million pieces on the floor. Neither man cares. The lawyer melts into the kiss. Just a simple touch of soft lips against his turns the best closer in New York into a puddle. Not even the destruction of one of his expensive glasses can distract him from the fact that they are kissing right now and he had never dared to dream he would be able to, some day.
- Why? – whispers Harvey when they distance themselves just enough to breathe. He looks for Mike's eyes and he finds them shinning.
- Do you need to ask? – answers Mike, also whispering. The moment feels as sacred as it feels fragile.
- Really? – Harvey says. Not mockingly. In fact, there is something in Harvey's voice that could be interpreted as hopeful, like he is trying and failing at keeping his thoughts from turning too optimistic, lest he is wrong. Mike is a height he would not survive falling from.
- Really – repeats Mike because what else is there to say?
He loves Harvey. He has loved Harvey for a long time. Even when he lusted after other people in his life, his feelings for his mentor never wavered. Luckily, it seems his affections are not misplaced. Maybe, just maybe, Mike's heart gets to enjoy a happy ending this time. And he can build one for Harvey as well.
After a moment of silence, Harvey's eyes acquire some steel. His whole demeanour changes and the man he knows and loves appears suddenly right in front of Mike.
- You should do it again, then – he says, as sure as a cat with its pray between its paws.
- Do what? – Mike can't help bit tease. Their banter is a familiar suit after all this years, leather-soft from use but perfectly cared for.
- Kiss me, you annoying...
Harvey doesn't get to finish that sentence. His back hits the wall and he willingly stays there, letting Mike take control and ravage his mouth like he has been itching to do for years. Surrendering control is not something he is known for but it does not feel foreign this time, even though his instincts say it should by force of habit. He has trusted Mike before, with his very life. Right now, he is beginning to realise his heart is also safe in his hands.
His body, however, is in wandering hands. While Harvey's hands made themselves at home in Mike's blond strands, the other man's are trying to touch him everywhere at the same time. While his soft lips move in perfect synchrony with his, his hands wander, too impatient to stay in the same place for long. They flutter about like they want to love all of Harvey at once.
Eventually, they separate although they rest their foreheads against each other’s, unwilling to lose that intimate connection they have only just discovered. Mike smiles and reaches out to hold Harvey’s hands in his. Just like before, they stay in silence, breathing each other’s air. Tonight, words have not served a good purpose. Better to keep quiet and let actions speak for themselves.
They go to sleep with their legs tangled beneath the sheets to be as close as possible during the night lest one of them disappears forever. Before midnight, the younger man falls asleep with his nose buried in his lover’s hair and a faint smile on his otherwise calm expression. Harvey doesn’t feel the pull of slumber yet but he is content to lie there, in Mike’s arms, for as long as it takes. He is willing to do it until morning, if only to commit this instant to memory forever. With nothing else to do but think, he lets himself hope. The days of daydreaming about Mike and feeling guilty about it are over. They’re stuck together now, for better and for worse. This is their new reality; Harvey is going to fight to keep it harder than anything he has fought for in his life.