Work Text:
It was was a normal day in hell, which meant the day was anything but normal, and everybody was as sane as posible, meaning nobody was even remotely sane, and Carmilla, who usualy prided herself in being an at least slightly normal and sane sinner, was anything but that. Because today there was an overlord meeting, and she was going over the points of disscusion with Zestial, even though she knew they would fall into desary before long. All of the alchahol in her house was sitting in an easily accesible spot, because she would deffinetly need it after the chaos.
She sighed. The meeting plan was ready, and everyone should have already been there for about 10 minutes. She might have been putting of starting the meeting for those ten minutes, and she knew full well that leaving those buffons alone for even a little while was going to blow up in her face anyway, so she entered the room with Zestial and her daughters by her side.
She was imediatly greeted by screaming and the other overlords throwing things at each other. Carmilla looked around, and, as she expected, Rosie, Alastor and Velvette were sitting in a corner laughing and relishing in the chaos, joining in from time to time. Rosie and Alastor had been doing this since they've been coming to the meetings, but their friendship with Velvette was a new( very unpleasant ) development. She had no idea how Alastor had become friends with her, while he was her associate's prisoner no less, but it was deffinetly hurting the productivity of these meetings. To be fair, Alator always had made these meetings as unproductive as posible(and if she missed those interuption, and felt a small pang of sadnes in her chest when her meetings went smoothly during his seven year absence, then nobody needed to know).
Maestro and Zeezi were screaming at Prick and Hatchet, throwing everithing they could get their hands on at each other. When she turned her head back at Alastor, he looked ready to fight Valentino, and oh, joy, the insuferable porn moth was at the meeting. She didn't want to know what he'd said, it was probably something of a sexual nature, she could guess by her limited knowledge of the overlord. Velvette took her phone out(and herself out of the conversation) and Rosie's expression was somewhere between a manic smile and a threat. Carmilla oppened her mouth, hoping desperately they would stop fighting as she started the meeting.
-Greetings, overlords.
The yelling imediatly turned toward her.
-One at a time! You will all stop behaving like children and we will disscus what we came here to disscus!
And with that, most of the overlords calmed down.
-Wha...don't throw Val out the window!
Most of the overlords. Alastor had the porn moth pinned in the air with his tentacles, Velvette was trying to stop him from doing...whatever Alastor does, and Rosie was next to them, clapping and laughing.
-Can everybody calm down? Alastor, put Valentino down, Rosie stop encouraging him.
They begrugingly did as told.
-Now that everything is in order, you all know we have gathered here because of...recent incidents that-
Velvette interupted:
-Speaking of those...
She reached down in to her bag, and Carmilla could already feel a headache forming. If this was anything like the angel incident, she would not make it to the halway point. She was interupted from her musings by an indignant voice.
-Don't pull that har-Ow! Watch the edges!
Carmilla looked at the thing Velvette was pulling out of her bag, and sure enough, Vox's very angry looking screen-face-thing was there, and yep that was deffinetly a headache forming.
-Shut up, V! And stop glaring at the deer, I'm stuffing you back in the bag if you don't behave!
-Just mute him, Vel! Yelled Valentino. He won't be able to do anything that way, running his mouth is the only thing he knows how to do!
-Yes. That is the first smart thing that came out of your mouth.
Vox started glitching the moment Alastor said that, and this was probably the moment to step in.
-Ahem. As I was saying, we have gathered here to disscus the recent...angelic cannon incident. The Might of Lilith almost destroyed half the pride ring, and I think we can all agree that Vox should be striped of overlord status, seeing as he is the one who-
-Wait a minute, so you're saying this is my fault? If I remember correctly, aren't you the one who built it?
-You were the one who kept firing, even when you were warned to-
-Oh, convenient excuses. I vote that we strip both Carmilla and Vox of their overlord status, for endangering everyone in the fucking pentagram.
-A-What the fuck, Vel? Wha-We were supposed to-
-You really thought you could just waltz in like nothing happened and forget about trying to blow us all up? Think again V! You and the Carmine bitch should not be at this meeting!
Before Carmilla could get the chance to deffend herself, Zestial spoke up:
-Oh, so Carmilla is at fault, but thys own associates hold no blame.
-He's right, though! If anybody's losing their title, it should be the Vs. All of them. Agreed Zeezi.
A chorus of agreement rose up from all of the gathered overlords.
As much as she hated all of the Vs, she was going to offer them a way out, even if just to finish this meeting earlier. She had to admit, the other Vs weren't as much at fault as Vox, and all of them had earned their eternal punishment to even be at this meeting.
-I do not believe that anybody but Vox is at fault for this. She was liying trough her teeth, but they were in hell and she knew she would be questioned if the V's were. If we all agree, he is no longer an overlord, and we can forget what happened.
-Okay.
-Sure.
-Why not?
-I could not care less, but if it means getting rid of Vox, I'm on board
-Fine.
-Whatever Vel said.
-Alright then. Meeting adjorned. We'l disscus Charlie's hotel and redemption next time. Alastor, I expect you to convince the princess to come too, and we also need to disscus some of your recent actions.
- Oh, I won't need to convince her, she loves embarasing herself in front of an audience!
Zeezi shook her head:
-These meetings are getting deeper and deeper into ,,could have just been an e-mail'' teritory.
Something told her the next meeting was going to be bad, and this 10 minute one had already given her a headache, that doubled in intensity as she left the room and heard Velvette scream:
-She cut the meeting short by exactly 2 hours and 50 minutes! Everyone owes me money!
Carmilla let her head fall into her hands. Where did she put that alcahol again?
