Chapter Text
Charlie was fine. She was great. Amazing. Not spiraling. She flinched at Vaggi's touch because she was busy coming up with a flawless plan and not because she was completely freaking out.
-It's okay, babe. Remember, breathing is a fun, productive activity.
-I'm meeting the overlords. *Totaly normal gulp of air*About the hotel. *Still totaly normal gulp of air* The most powerfull sinners in hell, that probably despise the idea of redemption!
-We've gotten this far. Nothing can stop us now.
-How do we get them to like this?! How the hell do we make redemption sound appealing to them?! They don't want the souls they own to just disapear to heaven! We. Have. To. Make. Them. Like. This. She said, getting closer to Vaggi's face with each word while her horns grew.
-You're going to have to convince them that this pointless little hotel of yours is worth their time, you have about 10 more minutes to prepare, and most of them think you are a joke. My, my the odds seem to be stacked against you. Or you have neatly stacked them against you trough hard work. It's anyone's guess!
Vaggi turned to the sinner that had manifested into the room:
-Alastor, are you going to help us, or can you fuck off now?
-Hmm, let mee think...No! On both of your questions!
-We're trying to make last minute preparations, so maybe you should go do...whatever weird shit you usually do and leave us alone.
-Not possible. We have to leave. Now. Carmilla tends to get herself worked up when we're late.
-I still don't get why you're letting him come with you.
-Because I will greatly enjoy her failure, unlike you. Such an amusing moment would be a waste of time on someone this unapriceative of great entertainment.
-Look, Vaggi, he might not believe in me, or what we're doing here for that matter, but he's a respected overlord, and it's better to have him on our side in this meeting. Also, I can't really make him not come.
-Why, I never said I didn't believe in you.
-Wha-really? You actually have faith in me? Charlie's eyes lit up.
-Of course! I have complete faith that you will stagger in, fall flat on your face and look as pathetic as possible in front of everybody.
-Don't listen to the asshole, babe. You'l do great.
-Right! I'l go get my drawings and my flashcards and-
-I think that is the last thing you want to do.
-Well, how else am I going to tell them about redemption?
-Tastefully. Which those colorfull hand-drawn pictures are anything but.
-Look, Alister...I know my ideas might seem silly-
-Because they are.
-But could you please give them a chance?
-I'm not the one not willing to entertain them. You have to convince the other overlords too.
-I don't like it, babe,...but he might have a point. I have a more...profesional powerpoint prepared if you want to use it. The overlords aren't known for being open-minded souls. Said Vaggi.
-*Sigh* Okay...But I'm still taking my drawings, just in case! Charlie paused for amoment. But I still don't really get it! I mean Sir Pentious was reedemed, we saved all of hell trough the power of friendship...How come these supposed ,,overlords'' still don't believe in the hotel? I mean, yeah, they would lose souls, but they could reedem themselves! They wouldn't need those souls if they're in heaven!
-Why, that is a simple question to answer! To be reedemed, you need to want it first! I, for example, am perfectly happy where I am now!
-Maybe, but-
-While I find our pointless conversation charming, we should be going now.
-'Kay. Bye, Vaggi!
-Goodbye, hon. Take care and good luck! Call me if the overlords get any ideas! She said, gripping her spear. Or if Alastor keeps being a piece of shit.
-No violence necesary, Vaggi! Besides what could go wrong! Haahaha, ha hh....
-What could go wrong? Well, I'm glad you asked! I happen to keep an alphabetized list right here!
This time both girls turned to the overlord:
-Shut up, Alastor!
-Don't say you haven't been warned! Then again, considering the scandal with Vox, I don't doubt your ability to completly disregard warnings.
-Okay, pompous creepy ass, Said Vaggi, raising her spear, you will stop insulting my girlfriend or-
-Speaking of Vox! Is he going to be at the next meeting? Asked Charlie, in an attempt to derail her girlfirend.
-Oh, no! He was kicked out last time! He said, and then laughed.
-Kicked out? Questioned Vaggi, lowering her spear.
-Yes, he is no longer an overlord.
-Huh. Charlie looked thoughtfull. I didn't know that could happen.
-It is very rare, but since Vox managed to screw up so badly that the whole pride ring was endangered, and since he lost most of his power, we saw no reason to keep him in our ranks.
-So, we're Vox free at least and-Oh shit! We should really be going!
-That is what I have been saying for the past 10 minutes, Charlotte.
-Right, sorry, Al.
-No matter! We can teleport there.
-We can whaaaaaaaaaaa
Before Charlie could say anything, she felt shadows envelop her. Trough them she could see the whole pentagram dart around in front of her eyes. The shadows retracted and she was standing in front of a Carmine building, Alastor behind her with his hands on her shoulders. She decided not to comment on the experience as Alastor walked into the building and Charlie sprinted to catch up. They were going down a hall when she heard a somewhat familiar voice:
-Of course I've got everything ready-No! What the heck, Val! I'm not saying that!-Yeah, of course I want to piss all of those losers off, but that's just inapropri-...WHAT DO YOU MEAN ,,I'm going to be late for my shoot''-Yes, I know what a fucking shoot is -THE PROBLEM IS THAT YOU'RE LEAVING V ALONE! YOUR BOYTOY IS ALREADY TROUBLE WITH SUPERVISION-NO DON'T FUCKING HANG UP ON ME-...MOTHERFUCKER!
They rounded the corner and saw Velvette throwing a closed phone at the ground. Alastor looked at her.
-Good day, Velvette!
-*grumbling*....fucking idiots...*grumbling*...ungratefull losers..
She completely ignored Alastor(or didn't notice him) and went to pick up her phone.
-Velvette.
-*grumbling*...never going to-
-Ahem. Velvette, my dear!
Her head snaped to him, turning to a 180 degree angle like an owl.
-Oh, hey All.
-I take it you're not doing well?
She snaped her head back into place and walked up to him.
-Mpf. Val left your stalker on his own, so expect a mild anoyance this afternoon. Don't fuck him up to badly, I have to fix both V and the outcome of his tantrum.
-How could a severed head be such a bother?
-He has a mouth, and that's all he needs.
-Mmm. Yes. A shame he couldn't have lost the abillity to speak along with his body.
-I'm considering still aranging that.
Charlie was sitting ankwardly to the side, trying to not attract attention. She did not want to talk to the person who demonized her and tarnished her reputation. She also had a slew of new questions for Alastor. Something to the effect of WHAT do you mean by stalker and When did you get so friendly with the person who imprisoned you. Before she could insert herself into the conversation( and perhaps get them to the meeting, she really needed to get this presentation over with)Velvette noticed her.
-Oh, great. You've brought the idiot princess.
Charlie oppened her mouth, maybe to politely calm the V, or maybe to deffend herself, but Velvette's mouth was faster than hers:
-Are you here to emberase yourself publicly for about, like what, the fifth time this month?
-You were the one who deliberatly tricked us into-
-Now, now, Charlotte. No need to get so worked up.
-Rgh. You're right, Al. We should get to the meeting.
-Of course. He said, putting his hand on some door's handel. Are you coming, Velvette?
-Sure. Lets stir shit up before the old bitch gets here.
Charlie perked up worriedly:
-Umm...please don't sabotage this.
Velvette ignored her and walked in, pushing past Alastor, who scowled and then went after her. Charlie scuried in after them, and was greeted by pure chaos. A cactus-like demon and a bird-like demon were screaming and throwing chairs and magic at each other, others that she didn't know doing the same. The only people who weren't participating in the tussle were Velvette and Alastor, who had just arrived, and Rosie, who was sitting at the table watching everything going on. Velvette Flopped down in the chair next to her and said:
-Wow! You got some work done before we could arrive!
-Of course I did! You forget I've been doing this before you even landed here!
Alastor sat down side ways and twirled his cane:
-Don't ever underestimate Rosie, the last one to do so didn't have a pleasant fate.
Charlie had twenty questions for Rosie after that interaction. Was she really crueler than she seemed? Maybe just to her enemise, she reasoned, and if you had reason to be Rosie's enemy then you couldn't be the best person.
-Ummm...will this be fixed in time for my presentation, right?
-Of course, darling! It takes so little to start a fight and just as little to stop it with these idiots. Everything will be fine, sweetie.
Charlie smiled and opened her mouth to thank her, but was distracted by a soft clacking sound. She turned her head and saw that Carmilla and her daughters had walked in, and also a creepy spider demon that sat down in a big chair next to them. Charlie still hadn't exactly gotten over the fact that she had helped Vox, but whatever. Vaggi went to her for training, and she did need to be on her good side to convince the other overlords. Carmilla sighed and said:
-Alright, everybody find a seat and put out the fire. Maestro, stop setting stuff on fire. And also stop singing. You too, Zeezi. We do not live in a musical.
Grumbling and muttering ensued, but almost everybody sat down. Almost everybody. A bird-like demon and a cactus demon were still fighting, wrestling on top of the table.
-Hatchet, Prick, please stop fighting. Carmilla's eyes narowed. Now.
The two demons rolled their eyes, then Hatch said slily:
-We weren't fighting.
Then they started passionatly kissing. Rosie and Velvette watched with interest, while Alastor's smile widened. Every other overlord face-palmed. Carmilla sighed and rubbed her forehead.
-This is still not work place appropriate, and I am asking you to sit down.
They stopped and sat down on a single chair, Hatch on Prick's lap. Charlie wasn't sure if they were trying to strangle eachother or hugging.
-By the seating rules.
Hatch scoffed and Prick muttered something, and they sat as far as posible from each other. Alastor cleared his throat at that moment:
-Now, could we begin? Charlie needs to start her...presentation.
-No, first you need to move chairs.
-Whatever do you mean by that?
-If you sit next to Rosie, you won't pay attention and I need you involved since this is also your project, and I already sent you a letter to inform you that you are prohibited from sitting next to the Vs. No, I do not care Rosie is the only one you tolerate. She added when she saw Alastor wanted to protest.
Alastor, of course, still protested.
-I don't understand why I shouldn't sit next to the Vs.
-We established thousands of times why you shouln't sit even near Vox, I will manage to enforce this even now he is not an overlord even if it's the last thing I do, I need the power to be on to work ,you can murder Valentino in your free time and Velvette is already a headache and a brat without your help. She sent a pointed glare in the doll demon's direction.
Add ,,Why does Alastor hate Valentino'' to the list of questions. She already knew about Carmilla and Velvette's rivalry, as did most of hell, Voxtok was a powerfull app. She didn't even know when Velvette had had time to record the singing match.
-Oh, Velvette started twirling a finger, so the bossy bitch is insulting me now. Didn't know you had bark in you. Too bad we already knew the bite's barley there.
Carmilla looked unimpressed and oppened her mouth to retort, when Rosie jumped in:
-Now, now, ladies. We don't have time for another musical number.
-Don't worry, she only starts singing if you insult her boyfriend.
Carmilla sputered at that. Velvette smiled smugly. Charlie didn't understand what was happening.
-Ahem. We should begin the meeting about mine and Charlie's hotel.
Carmilla glared at Alastor.
-Change seats first.
Alastor's creepy shadow powers engulfed his and another overlord's seats, and they were swaped in seconds.
-Since you all have finally calmed down, lets begin. Charlotte?
Carmilla motioned to a spot next to her, up front, next to a white board. Charlie took a deep breath.
-Okay! She said with a clap. As you all know, one of the residents of my-the Hazbin hotel was reedemed. Since you're the...controling powers...in hell and own the most souls, I've come to give my reasons for why redemption is our gate way to a better future. Now-
Velvette's hand hovered in the air. Charlie was to optimisstic to be filled with dread by this.
-Yes, Velvette?
-Can you try to make your pitch sound less like you're Vox? You know, Vox, the guy who manipulated everyone and attempted to kill all of us last week?
Carmilla rolled her eyes.
-Your asociate, might I remind you.
Alastor humed.
-Yes, you might want to make it sound less...
-Cult leader. Offered Rosie
-Yes, that.
-You're suposed to be helping me, Al!
-I am helping. With constructive slander.
-Okay, but could you have done this before or after the meeting?
-I tried to, but you ignored me.
The overlords looked with undisguised interest at their back and fort.
-This is my presentation! You don't even care about the hotel!
-Why wouldn't I care about my on-going source of entertainment?
-See?!
-Darling, please save everyone's dignity and sanity and just put on Vagatha's powerpoint.
-This is my hotel, I'l explain it better.
-So you don't trust your own girlfriend?
-Of course I trust her! I just feel that I-
Carmilla cleared her throat.
-You can work trough your personal misunderstandings outside of meetings.
-Right, sorry Carmil-Miss Carmine. As I was saying,-Yes, Velvette?
-Why the fuck are we here anyway? I certanly didn't come here to hear about your pathetic hotel-
Carmilla interjected.
-Then you didn't read the e-mail corectly. Sit down and shut up.
-Okay, but can we at least stop beating around the bush? We're here because we don't want to lose our power and contracts, and you're here because you're delusional enough to think we'll change our minds.
Charlie felt her demonic form coming out.
-That's not-
-Charlotte, dear, could you please put on the powerpoint?
-But-
-I'll make sure no one interupts.
-Fiiiiiiineeee.
So they spent the next two hours on Vaggi's presentation. It was good, and mostly explained the hotel. The overlords, now with Alastor's threat hovering over their threats, and some mild action from the demon, were dead silent the whole time. She hoped they were paying attention. She was impressed by Alastor's influence over the others, as she was used to seeing him fighting on equal footing. When they were done she asked:
-Any questions?
That was a mistake. Velvette raised her hand. So did everybody else, except for the really creepy guy in the chair next to Carmilla(her boyfriend?). Even Carmilla had her hand tentativly raised and was looking expectantly at Charlie.
-Alright, we should organize this.
-We can go around the table. Sugested Carmilla.
-Oh, convenient, exactly the order you can go first in. The remark was made by a voice that had become way to familiar this meeting.
-Why am I even here?
-I don't know, you certanly don't have the cualifications to be here. If you didn't have the old fossil that everybody respects for some reason on your side, you'd be dead by now!
Charlie didn't hear the other overlord's response, because she had leaned in towards Alastor.
-Is this how every meeting goes?
-Yes, pretty much. Responded Alastor.
-I would think something was wrong if these meetings were productive, Said Rosie who had moved next to Alastor when Carmilla wasn't looking.
-I think Zestial told me about a meeting from a time where the people at this table were sane.
-Who's Zestial? Asked Charlie.
Alastor motioned towards the creepy spider guy.
-Oh, Carmilla's boyfriend.
Rosie and Alastor erupted into laughter.
-Oh, sorry, are they married?
Their laughter got louder. Finaly, Rosie droped on the table, still wheezing.
-We'l explain later, darling. I think you're totaly lost right now.
-Yes, I am, could you explain everything?
-When we leave, focus on your pitch for now.
She turned at the same time as Carmilla. The overlord looked like she had resolved the fight
-So, you told us all your reasons and you motives, but it still doesn't answer our biggest question: Why should we want this for the souls in our care? How do we now this is the safest move for us?
-Oh, that's easy! She said, even though she'd been dreading this. They would be happier in heaven!
-I don't think you know who you're talking to. We need those souls for our own safety.
-Well, you could reedem yourselves!
Everyone laughed.
-What makes you think that would be possible? Asked Carmilla, glaring at the other overlords
-Your want to improve! Carmilla raised an eyebrow. So did everybody else. Your daughers would be much safer-
And that was the exact moment Charlie fucked up. Velvette smirked, teleported her phone, Charlie had no idea when it had ended up next to Zestial's side of the table, and pointed the camera at Charlie and Carmilla. The doll demon made a vertical motion acros her throat towards Charlie as Carmilla's nails scraped at the table.
-I see that you are not any better than Vox. You can not do anything with the souls in our care without permision, and you certanly do not have mine. If any overlord would like to give that pemision, that is their decission. Meeting adjourned. Everyone get out.
Velvette protested:
-So we have to cut this meeting short just 'cause you're a bit touchy-*Carmilla treatheningly glared at her*-okay, jeez, I'm leaving, she said, garbbing her phone and scurring out. This is why we shouldn't be having these meetings at her house.
-Anybody that wants to host them in my stead can speak up. She waited a couple of seconds. That's what I thought.
Everybody shufled out as Carmilla closed the door behind them, grumbling amongst themselves:
-Ughh. This ended right when things got interesting, grumbled Prick.
-Yeah, I want to do something fun to make up for it, said Hatch.
-Lets set something on fire! Sugested a flaming skull guy.
-Lets set someone on fire! Said a dinosoar lady.
-Lets start a fight instead!
-By setting someone on fire!
-While singing!
-And dancing!
Charlie quickly made her way out of the deranged crowd, out of the building, and then colapsed outside. Why did I have to mess this up?