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1. Two Birds, One Stone by macaque

   Fandoms: Kingdom Come: Deliverance (Video Games)  

   • Explicit
   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • M/M
   • Work in Progress

   05 May 2026

   Tags

   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • Hans Capon/Henry
   • Hans Capon
   • Henry of Skalitz
   • Crack
   • crackity crack crack
   • Curses
   • Bottom Henry of Skalitz
   • Double Penetration
   • This entire fic is just an excuse to get Henry DP'd
   • However Hans is also banging his double the entire time
   • can you blame him?
   • Humor
   • A facsimile of something approaching plot
   • KCD1 era
   • Hans Capon is endowed
   • Jealous Hans Capon
   • Vers Hans Capon

   Summary

   "Alright, I'm choosing to believe you. Don't make me regret it, sir," Henry warned, pointing a finger at his nose. "So what's the curse? Missing pizzle? Wouldn't be the first time I've helped a man with that."

   Sir Hans Capon wakes up to find himself having fallen victim to a curse: another man, with his face, his voice, and his stunningly handsome figure has appeared beside him, claiming to be him.

   ...At least, he thinks it was supposed to be a curse. It probably would have been more of a curse were he not secretly a sodomite, and were he not also very, very, very horny.

   Then it turns out that his double can apparently do everything better than he can, including getting big-eyed, big-eared yokel lads from Skalitz to fall for him. And that...no, that simply cannot stand.

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   4,827

   Chapters:

   1/?

   Comments:

   19

   Kudos:

   72

   Bookmarks:

   7

   Hits:

   467