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It was a magical event.
Couples were everywhere, mostly yaoi, waiting for Sleepy Joe to walk down the isle and marry his husband, Trump.
Their closest friends, Hamilton and Laurens, were smiling in the front row while holding hands. Hamilton was holding back tears of joy, though he wasn't the only one. Danny Devito was clutching onto his own husband: The Jersey Mikes Sub, whom he had only married a month ago.
Sitting next to Hamilton and Laurens were everyones favorite country couple: Blake Shelton and Luke Bryan. Blake had his hand resting on Lukes thigh, and his head on his shoulder. Usually they'd be bickering, but right now it was a moment of love and tranquility between the two country boys.
The groomsmen were also there, standing by Trumps side. It included Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Abraham Lincoln, Xi Jimping, David Baszucki, and of course, the best man, Kim Jong Un. Trump was standing in the front, nervously fidgeting with his fingers. He was getting a little bit antsy, where was Biden? The love of his life?
Suddenly, the Chruch doors burst wide open. 'Here Comes The Bride' starts playing on the organ, performed by Benson Boone. Standing at the doors was none other than Joe Biden, dressed in all white with a Boquet of flowers in his hands as he slowly started making his way down the isle. All eyes were on him in the moment.
Thomas Jefferson is smiling in the back, his arm wrapped around his wife's shoulders. His wife is Hatsune Miku. J. K. Rowling, a trans FTM, gives Biden a proud smile. Walt Disney was silently crying happy tears, Taylor Swift was smiling, and so was Mr. Beast, Adam Sandler, Jeff Bezos and Albert Einstein. Even sweet ol' Queen Elizabeth II, was smiling happily for the newly wed couple.
Biden made it up to Trump, who is grinning like a lovesick fool. But can you blame him? Biden looked so beautiful...
Morgan Freeman was the pastor, and he took out his signed copy of the Holy Bible, personally signed by Jesus, before starting the ceremony.
"Dearly beloved and honored guests, we are gathered together to join Donald Trump and Joe Biden in the spiritual union of marriage. This..."
Everyone was smiling at the radiant couple standing in the front. Even all the groomsmen were smiling. All the couples were either holding each others hands, or one partner held on to the other partners arm as they continued to listen to Morgan Freemans beautiful voice.
"Mister Trump, do you take this man, Joe Biden, as your lawfully wedded husband?" Freeman asks as he turns to Trump.
"I do" Trump beams proudly as a single stray teardrop falls from his eye.
"Mister Biden, do you-"
"STOP THE WEDDING!"
Oh no. It was none other than Trumps ex, Elon Musk. They got into a heated argument back in June which led to their fallout. When they broke up, Trump went back to Biden and proposed to him. Now they were getting married until fucking Elon had to ruin it all. Everyone gasped and froze at his arrival. Blake possessively sheilds Luke from Elon, Hamilton and Laurens were barely processing the situation. In fact, half the audience didn't know what was even happening.
"What the fuck are you doing here, Musk?!" Trumps yells as he shields Biden, who has fallen asleep while standing up. Shocker. "I thought I never wanted to see your stupid face again!"
"Wait- Trump!" Elon pleads as he runs down the isle. "Please, I know I made a mistake! And it costed me a loss of 5 whole dollars! I lost 5. Whole. Dollars from the stock market! Please, take me back! I'll take back everything I said, including the part about Epstein!" He begged, dropping to his knees infront of the orange man.
Half the audience starts booing at Musk, including Benson Boone. He grabbed an entire bucket full of Moonbeam ice cream, which was going to be used during desert, and chucked it right at him. He got struck in the back, and Musk landed with a thud on the floor, lying in pain.
"Ow- Damnit!" Elon groaned as he clutched his back, looking up at Trump in pain.
"NICE SHOT BENSON!" Hamilton screams, which gets everyone else to cheer for Benson as well.
Even Luke Bryan, who would never hurt a fly, Was cussing out Elon. Blake sat there by his side, looking at Luke with a proud smirk on his face.
"Who let this fool into the chruch?!" Laurens complains.
"Kick him, Trump!" Xi Jimping encourages.
"Let's execute him!" Kim Jong Un adds.
By now, 1/3 of the audience was yelling at Trump to kick Elons ass, as Elon was in critical back pain and begging at Trumps knees. It was chaos.
"ENOUGH"
Everyone went silent. It was Queen Elizabeth II. Turns out, she was the head of the church. She stood up and did the T-Pose, and then started floating into the air with dramatic music playing in the background. She started speaking curses in Pig Latin, causing Elon to start shaking and eventually burst into neon pink confetti. Queen Elizabeth II then sits back down gracefully in her seat as if that never happened in the first place.
Sleepy Joe finally wakes up, and is confused by what happened. But Trump just smiles at Joe. He grabs the rings from the ring bear, Xi Jimping. He takes Joes ring and delicately slides it on his finger.
"Joe..." Trump whispers. "Do you take me as your alpha and husband?"
"I do" Joe whispers back as Trump slid the ring on his finger.
"Well then" Morgan Freeman interrupts. "You may kiss the bride"
Trump pulls Biden into him, and they both go in for a dramatic tounge kiss. The crowd went wild and everyone cheered for the newlywed political yaoi couple.
After the ceremony, the Moonbeam ice cream Benson Boone threw at Musk got served by him for desert. Which everyone enjoyed. Some even went back for multiple rounds until the container was empty. Kin Jong Un also gave the most beautiful speech about how if Joe hurt Trump, Joe would have his ass executed. And during the dance, Maroon 5 performed for everybody, and not a single person was sitting down. Everyone was dancing, especially during 'Sugar'.
Oh, and at the of the night, Trump and Biden fucked, the end :D