Chapter Text
The clock hits 2:00 PM, and Seungmin is one of the last few students to leave the room as he finishes his exam. He finally steps out of the building, inhales the much needed afternoon air.
Summer finals week. It's finally over. With another weight being lifted off his chest, he looks at the text he received this morning from his roommate:
good luck on your finals!
i'll see you soon later!!!
He arrives at their quiet bench by the tree early, as always. Not that he minds waiting. Felix had flown back home with Chan, his soulmate, to spend the summer with their families.
Seungmin missed the hum of his voice and the mundane conversations they always have, but he knows Felix never stays away for long. His roommate doesn't put things off for tomorrow, especially when it comes to his favorite people.
Not five minutes later, two arms wrap around his shoulders abruptly, startling Seungmin from his thoughts but not surprising him. "Seungminnn," that deep voice sings.
"Lix."
"I missed you. I left you alone all summer." He takes his seat on the bench and holds Seungmin's shoulders tight, looking at him with shiny eyes like they're having a ten-year reunion.
A breathy laugh leaves Seungmin as he rolls his eyes at the dramatics. "How was the trip?"
"It was really nice. We had dinner together every night, and me and my sisters got some time to ourselves and went shopping. We saw Chan's family too! Honestly, I didn't do anything crazy back at home, but..." Felix sighs deeply, a content smile on his face, "I missed them so much. I'm glad we went."
Seungmin hums with a nod. Felix takes his hands and squeezes it, a sweet habit of his. But something catches his friend's attention because his eyes light up and slowly narrow, pleasantly surprised.
"I'm glad that you didn't just study your butt off this whole summer," he comments teasingly.
"Uh, what do you mean?" Seungmin's afraid to inform that all he's literally done for the past two months was study his butt off.
Felix smirks and lifts the hand that he's holding. Seungmin is confused but then notices that there's something written on the back of his hand in what seems to be pen. There's a series of numbers, and it takes him a moment to realize that it's a phone number followed by a coy-looking winky face.
Seungmin blinks at the writing for a second, not sure how to process this. How did that even get there?
"Seungmin, when did you start going for people's numbers?" Felix asks, sounding a little too invested in his nonexistent love life. Maybe even proud that he's finally taking it into his own hands.
Because the thing is, Seungmin doesn't have a soulmate. The universe had all the time in the world to let him know, from the moment he was born to the moment he turned 18. It's not impossible to find your soulmate later on, but everyone knows it may as well be. The universe is weird like that.
Felix had a named etched under his collarbone when he turned 19. A year later, Chan became a part of Felix's life just as much as Seungmin's life. He's never met someone who could stand so tall and firm but fall so easily into a fit of sheepish giggles when flustered. Nonetheless, Seungmin really likes him. He'd never say it out loud—it would only encourage Chan's already dad-like tendencies, like making sure he's drinking enough water every day—but it's really nice to have another older figure in his life. It was an inexplicable experience to see it unfold in real time too. When they were together, it just felt right—Chan's arms enveloping Felix, Felix matching Chan's fond gazes. He's never been more happier for his friend.
It was never clear from the beginning for Seungmin, but the signs always came quiet and subtle, ushering him away before the young confessions could slip from him.
A tiny crush on this girl. She had a name etched on the side of her pinky. This nice boy he got to know through a project. A birthday that didn't belong to him was displayed on his wrist. A bunch of more instances of him catching feelings for people who weren't meant for him. It's happened one too many times.
When Seungmin turned 18, his soulmate situation seemed to have been left unaddressed. Three and a half years later, the universe is still radio silent. It happens though. There are some exceptions in the world, those without soulmates, and it really comes down to what you decide to do with that information. So in a world where most people are destined to one another, Seungmin doesn't do "phone numbers."
Maybe this is why Felix always pays extra attention, brings him along wherever he goes. His roommate has basically banned the word "third-wheel" in their dorm. And well, it's hard to stop Felix when his mind is set on something. Even harder for Seungmin to say no to him.
Felix's eyes are practically sparkling. "I want to hear all about it."
"I didn't do this."
"Obviously. Because that's not your number. And you don't send winky faces."
"No- I didn't ask for anyone's number. This wasn't here earlier."
"You can tell me, you know."
Seungmin is at a loss for words. "I don't know how this happened."
Felix's face slowly shifts, his prodding smirk losing its tug. With the exception of Seungmin's flustered face, he sounds dead serious.
"Are you sure? Maybe someone did it when you fell asleep somewhere on campus."
"I spent the whole morning studying for my final. In our dorm. Awake."
Felix purses his lips. "Hmm. That's weird. It's okay, never mind then. Maybe you just rubbed your hand on something."
Seungmin tries to brush it aside as well, but there's no way his hand rubbed on something and left an imprint as clear as this. On top of that, it's not mirrored. That's not how ink stains work. But he knows he won't be able to make any sense of this no matter how much he thinks about it. He'll just wash his hands when they get back to the dorm. Out of sight, out of mind.
The two sit in silence on the bench, basking in the sunlight that trickles through the green leaves. What's important is that they're back together again, which means they'll quickly fall back into their happy household rhythm.
"You wanna try calling it?"
"No, Felix."
...
The fall semester starts off as ordinary as one can expect. Everybody scrambles around with their classes while trying to settle into their routines. No phone numbers, no winky faces. Seungmin quickly forgets about the incident as if it never happened.
However, a week later he gets a smiley face drawn on his palm. Two days later he gets an algebraic equation. Weird, Seungmin thinks, because he hasn't taken a math class in a year. For the next week or so, he's accompanied by little doodles and cryptic mathematics on his hand.
Seungmin has no idea what could be going on. Has he started sleepwalking? Has a ghost decided to haunt their dorm and use him as its personal canvas? Is Felix just playing a big, elaborate prank on him? Any theory Seungmin comes up with sounds too far-fetched for even himself to believe.
He gets his answer fairly quickly.
It's a Tuesday evening. Seungmin is on his bed, a textbook on his lap as he reads ahead for the upcoming week.
"I'm back," Felix voices, head peeking from the doorframe.
"How was the dance meeting?" Seungmin asks without looking up.
"Tiring." Yet, he says it with a smile. "We have so much we want to try this semester. It's going to be a lot of work, but I'm so excited." Felix enters and is just about to flop on his side of the room when he freezes in his tracks. Then, in three swift steps, he's right in front of Seungmin and holds his shoulders.
Seungmin startles at the sudden gesture. He's even more startled at the intense and equally intrigued look his roommate is giving him. His train of thought completely evaporates. "...What?"
"Are you to tell me when and how you got that hickey?"
He nearly does a double take. "What?"
"You have a hickey."
"What are you talking about?"
"Your neck."
"My neck?"
"It's right there."
Seungmin of course has no reason to believe this. He's been here at the dorm all day once again. Yet he unconsciously bring a hand to cover his neck, which is ridiculous because he has nothing to hide. Right? Unfortunately, Felix keeps ogling at him and eventually brings him into the bathroom. When Seungmin sees his reflection, he thinks his eyes are playing tricks on him.
There's a hickey. On his neck. That was not there this morning when he looked at himself in the mirror after brushing his teeth.
His mouth hangs open. "How...? I didn't..."
"Really?"
"Yes."
Felix quiets, eyebrows furrowed as they both mull over the color on his neck. Then, like a switch being flipped on, the two make eye contact in the mirror.
Seungmin freezes. "Is it..." The thought is so foreign, he can't bring himself to say it.
"Your soulmate," Felix finishes.
He feels himself reel as another realization hits him. "...They're already in a relationship."
"You don't know that for sure," Felix says. "If you had no idea about having a soulmate, then there's a good chance they had no idea too." A pause. Then, more light-heartedly, "You should let them know."
He's an optimist, a romantic, the embodiment of hope. Felix sees the best in everything. Even now, he somehow sees the best in this impossibly complicated situation.
Seungmin, however, can only let out a heavy sigh. "It... doesn't feel right." The very real reality of him having a soulmate, who might be already out of his reach, is getting to him.
"Whether they're really taken or not, you should let them know. They're your soulmate."
He can't help but wonder what was the point of having a soulmate—someone meant for you through time and space—it was so easy to lose each other like this. "I will," Seungmin reluctantly begins, "But not now. I need time to... digest all of this." Part truth, perhaps also part lie.
"Okay." Felix's voice softens, patient and anchoring. "This is... a lot. But I'm really happy for you."
Seungmin knows he means it and means well. Felix has practically been praying on his behalf ever since he turned up empty. However, Seungmin can only vaguely hum. He's not entirely sure where he stands right now.
Felix's eyes linger on their reflections a moment longer. "Want me to help cover it?" he whispers with a nudge to his shoulder.
Seungmin appreciates the gesture, and it's enough to make him smile just the tiniest bit. "Yeah."
...
Now that Seungmin knows all kinds of marks can appear on him, he feels like his self awareness has skyrocketed—but almost in a paranoid kind of way.
He's constantly checking every inch of himself visible to the world, even going as far as to have Felix triple-check him before he can step foot out of the dorm. Some things are just not meant to be seen by the light of day. It's tedious and kind of embarrassing but necessary for Seungmin's peace of mind. Much to his relief, he never gets a hickey after the incident.
Instead, the random doodles continue. Once, it was a bunch of vegetables. Another time, he got three cats. Last week, it was an incorrectly drawn bicycle. Yesterday, it was a drawing of a hamster next to a stove on fire.
Today Seungmin is at the coffee place, homework sprawled in an organized chaos across his little table by the window. He once again finds something scribbled on his hand. It's not a doodle this time.
Solve for x
Looks like the math has returned. Seungmin looks at the equation written below, and his brain immediately makes the connection. He remembers how to do this one. He could easily solve the problem on his hand.
Seungmin instinctively glances at his pen lying on the table as the thought echoes. He could easily solve the problem on his hand. His stomach churns at the implication.
His soulmate could be anywhere in the world. In fact, for all he knows, they could be separated by miles of ocean. But that's not really the case, is it? Seungmin rubs a thumb across the palm of his hand where the prompt silently stares back at him, as if waiting for a response. His soulmate is a lot closer than he'd like to think.
Quite literally at his fingertips.
He's not sure if he wants to talk to his soulmate yet, but it gets increasingly harder to idly sit by with each doodle that appears. Seungmin knows he has to do something at some point. He just wishes it didn't have to be under these circumstances.
This may as well be a good start. It's not like he's outright putting himself out there with an introduction. He's simply lending a hand, showing the right way like a spiritual guardian angel. Very subtle. Right in his comfort zone.
It's enough logical reasoning to convince himself. Seungmin grabs his pen and moves the numbers around like muscle memory. He writes small and most definitely makes sure not to be showy, until he gets the answer.
x = 8
He double checks his calculations just to make sure he's not over here spreading misinformation before going back to his own work in front of him. When he looks at his hand again half an hour later, there's another equation written with the same prompt.
Solve for x
Another one? Seungmin pauses, wary. He wasn't expecting a "response" that quickly. Is he being too bold about this? Is he just being paranoid?
Five minutes. Seungmin will give it five minutes before he starts doing the math. It should be enough time to not be too obvious. And that will be enough soulmate interaction for today. And tomorrow. And maybe for the rest of this year. Yes, very subtle.
x = 27
Something happens. Not even thirty seconds later, he gets a question that makes the world stop.
are you my soulmate?
Oh. This was happening. This was really happening, and his thoughts about this whole situation haven't even been completely sorted out yet!
And despite that, something pulls at Seungmin. It's a rush of longing that doesn't feel like his, and for a moment it outweighs the hesitation he's always carried. Seungmin writes back before he knows it.
Maybe?
!!!
HUH
HOLD ON I DID NOT EXPECT THAT TO
hi!!!!
WAIT can you write something back?!
I need to make sure I'm not going crazy right now
And... wow. His soulmate is sure full of energy. Seungmin wasn't quite expecting that. But then again, he never expected to have a soulmate at all, so what can he say?
Hi
wow
my chest feels like it's going to explode right now
this is so cool
we're writing on each other's hand! can you see this? ☚⍢⃝☚
Yes
wow!!!
wait wait waitwait
don't go okay?
my class just ended
What?
don't worry about it
let me get to my dorm first!
Class? Dorm? It never occurred to him that his soulmate may be a student too.
okay I'm back
That was barely a minute
nearly got ran over by a skateboarder but worth it!
what's your name?
I'm Jisung!
Okay. Apparently his soulmate had no survival instincts.
You're telling me your name just like that?
I don't mind
I'm a stranger
not anymore
What if I was a dangerous person?
I'm somewhat of a dangerous guy myself :)
Guy. Jisung is a guy. And because Seungmin keeps dodging the name question, Jisung begins going down a whole list of other questions he's more than eager to know about.
Seungmin learns a lot of things. They're the same age. They're born in the same month. They live in the same city. They're both students and go to the same freaking school. What the heck? This has to be some big, scheming joke the universe is taking pleasure in. The chances of them sharing all of these similarities boggle Seungmin's brain.
His heart is also nearly beating out of his chest. Jisung—his soulmate—is here. Literally, physically, really here. As in, there's-a-very-real-chance-we-might bump-into-each-other-without-knowing here.
Jisung keeps going, writing like there's no tomorrow. Meanwhile, Seungmin tries to keep up, deciding what he should share about himself out of courtesy and what he shouldn't so early on. He doesn't even realize how much time has gone by until the sound of utensils being washed in the kitchen area behind the cashier counter finally brings his attention to the darkening sky outside. Seungmin scribbles a note before Jisung can ask another eager question.
It's getting late
I have to go
you're right! sorry didn't mean to hold you
I should be getting stuff done honestly
It's okay
so no name still?
Seungmin purses his lips. It shouldn't be a big deal, but it feels like one. It's too much of himself put on display. He's not obligated to tell his name, right? Jisung shared his name though. But it's not like Seungmin asked for it. He feels guilty, nonetheless.
Let's just go with Min
is that your actual name or a nickname? or surname?
just curious
there's a lot of min's in the world you know?
That's all I can give you for now
min
okay I can live with that
just know that I'll be tempted to call you mine instead
goodnight!!
Seungmin nearly gets whiplash at the switch-up between the final messages. And it's now that he finally processes that he's been writing all over his hand this whole time. It looks like a mess made by some amateur tattoo artist. Some of Jisung's enthusiastic handwriting overlaps with Seungmin's smaller, more composed one. Felix is definitely going to notice this. But being limited to communication via hand is the least of Seungmin's worries.
Because now he has a soulmate. A very real soulmate he can put a name to.