Chapter Text
It was the following weekend before winter break, a time where the cool air would sting and tint your face red in the early morning, and when you would step on the icy grass just for the fun of it crunching in the cold weather. A beloved reminder of the liberty of having 2 weeks free from school.
But winter itself isn’t exactly heaven, sicknesses flu-like that come with stuffy, runny noses, the snow and ice making roads slippery and hazardous, and of course,
Winter depression. A more mental ailment usually described as sudden negative changes in behavior during the winter season.
Which might seem to be the cause for Kaidou’s sudden distancing, or abnormal changes in his behavior.
Kaidou regularly had excitable, colorful yet charmingly childish fantasies, played like movies in his head during class or when bored, but lately, there’s been a change.
Thats not to say it isn’t impossible for Kaidou to at some point “Grow out of” his quirky, chuunibyou, imaginative dreams, in fact these daydreams did oftentimes disturb his studies, but for something this quickly to clog his works of creative, outlandish pipe dreams was seemingly the cause of a factor that might not be something to do with the weather entirely.
Though not spoken out loud, Kaidou, during class was overthinking on overdrive, making his stressed brain almost impossible to read, what, did he learn that from Akechi? This change was of course more noticeable to someone who could quite literally read his mind.
Saiki, regardless of being able to read minds, found that Kaidou is not only a very repressed boy even in his own brain, But Saiki himself couldn’t hear Kaidou’s more pushed to the back of his head thoughts if he wanted to, so he had little knowledge as to why Kaidou was acting unusually abnormal.
Even during a boring class about something the both of them have memorized, it was the routine creative peak of Kaidou’s fantasia, but nowadays tuning into his mind seemed to bring a whole bunch of nothing but overthinking and racing thoughts about something more subconsciously then not that Saiki couldn’t even hear nor comprehend!
So actually thinking about it, what could be subconsciously pestering Kaidou?
Saiki laid in bed, wondering the question with more weight than it had ever before.
Well there was one possibility, that Kaidou was busy too much with his cram school and studying reinforced by Mrs. 1# Strict mother of the year, but even then that’s never been the thing to stop Kaidou, and even then that would be more easier to decipher if it were the case.
Possibility number 2, Is that Kaidou’s brain flunk could be caused by a factor more external and related to the weather, so if it were the case it’s more believable that the cause of this is in fact, Winter depression.
Saiki decided that although it may be intrusive, the issue could be easier seen by using clairvoyance on Kaidou while he’s home to see if his tight knit unconscious thoughts might unravel at a time when he can rest.
Saturday morning is when Saiki decides to take a look-see at Kaidou’s more interpersonal life, Saiki lays back on his headboard crossing his eyes, and sets his sights on Kaidou in his room.
Saiki, due to living more than 200 meters from Kaidou’s home, is unable to read his thoughts, but regardless focuses on whatever he’s doing at the moment, which speaking of, Kaidou is slightly hunched over his gaming chair, glaring at a screen a bit too closely for 6-7 in the morning, centering his attention at the website open on his computer.
Ah, well this makes a little more sense now. Kaidou is on a forum commonly populated with other teens, used to anonymously discuss interpersonal issues with people their own age to give advice, ,Saiki unconsciously grins a tad at the username Kaidou gave himself,
“Jtblkwingz1DRhatr”
To others online, it’s just some indecipherable gibberish keysmash or an inside joke they just aren’t in on, anonymous site and all, but to someone who’s heard Kaidou’s dark reunion nonsense it’s endearingly silly at the very least.
Saiki resolves, “To hell with it” and opens the forum on his laptop himself, though the site’s a bit stale at the early hour, why not have a chat with the “Jtblkwingz1DRhatr” himself? But Saiki is faced with a small issue himself, he too has to give himself a username as well.
”Coffeemaster9000” is pretty innocuous, eh? give up the username prize to Kusuo Saiki for a 1# in creativity!
As the site visitor count for showing how many people are on the website increases by exactly 1, Kaidou, or “Jtblkwingz1DRhatr” types in chat,
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: New person here?
Giggling a bit at his enthusiasm, Saiki, or “Coffeemaster9000” responds,
Coffeemaster9000: yeah, you?
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: Not exactly new here, I lurk here more often tbh
So, what are you in for? :p
Coffeemaster9000: just a bit bored ig, what about you?
Kaidou takes some time to type it out, picking his words out as carefully as he can.
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: It’s a long story but I’ve been kinda down lately, if you have the time I could tell you
Coffeemaster9000: I have all the time in the world, plus this site is for that thing anyways, I’ll be okay waiting
Kaidou smiles slightly at the comment, and attempts to articulate his feelings into clearer to read words.
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: so, for one I feel pretty unmotivated, yknow? not just that tho, to confess there’s someone I have a crush on, but i can’t express it, it feels like i know it’s gonna be unreciprocated or that i just can’t tell them about it, because i don’t even know what they would say in response, and it’s been crowding my brain just sometimes seeing them.
A crush? That’s definitely new, but doesn’t seem all that bad considering what else could be demotivating him,Shun’s definitely not the type to have crushes often though, seeing his past oblivious friend zoning with Yumehara. But crushes should be a more positive distraction from his delusions than this.
Coffeemaster9000: I mean I don’t think you’re supposed to know what a crush would say in response, but is that what has you unmotivated?
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: sorta, I think ive been preparing for them to reject me already, even tho they probably don’t even know about it, i just lose passion sometimes thinking of it.
Coffeemaster9000: I’m no expert, but I don’t think preparing yourself for rejection so hard it drains your passion is the best, whoever this person is, the worst they could do is say no, but what makes you think you have a low chance like that?
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: but it would also make it awkward considering we’re friends and all, they’re a good friend of min
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: sorry, different friend just texted me rn so i couldn’t finish that sentence, he wants to go snowman making, even though there’s not that much snow right now and it’s 7am, but like I was saying I see the person I have a crush on pretty often, and they’re friends with my other friends so I’m a bit scared it would muck up our friendship.
So it’s one of his friends? Narrows it down a bit but Saiki’s having a hard time thinking about which friend it may be.
Coffeemaster9000: I think I get that, if it’s impacting you like that it might just be better to tell the person and get it over with, but I don’t know the most about romance if I’m being honest.
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: me neither, this is like my first crush, and speaking of I feel like just missing snowman making altogether because I’ll most likely run into him on the way, and my head just starts spinning around them tbh, like I’m scared they can read my mind or something.
Run into “him”? Wait what was that about mind reading?
Coffeemaster9000: in my unprofessional opinion, I think skipping having fun with your friends for a crush isn’t really worth it, and if they’re really ur friend and reject you they’ll keep it a secret
plus, there’s much better things to do on a Saturday morning other than talk to strangers on the internet.
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr Is typing…
Jtblkwingz1DRhatr: Now that I think about it, i guess it would be pretty crappy to miss out on being with my friends cause of that, I’m gonna log off 4 now but thank you for the advice!!
Kaidou stretched back in his chair, turning his computer off before staring at the invitation from Nendou, like most of his rushed messages it had many typos, but Kaidou knew from experience now how to decipher the message “Meet us at the park for making snowmen” from,
”Gong 2 the prk to maek sorm snoemen!! meat us there dnt be l8”
The mix of internet abbreviations and the obvious rush to go to the park from the message was endearing at the very least if not illegible, and skipping out on that sort of experience because of a crush wasn’t a very Kaidou thing of Kaidou to do.
Kaidou put on his oversized winter coat, accompanied by a scarf most likely taller than his own height, before going downstairs to tell his mom he off to go to the park.
No matter which of his friends/crush were there, it wasn’t going to ruin this fine morning.
Saiki, satisfied somewhat at convincing Kaidou not to ditch his friends for some crush, looked down at the same message Kaidou was referring to that he also got from Nendou, a hardly legible invitation that probably would look like a secret code in a low quality spy movie to anyone else if they got it.
Swiftly after announcing his leave to the park to his parents and opening the door to the cool winter air, there was still a persistent question bothering Saiki, and that was, who is Kaidou crushing on? It’s really not his business but-He tried keeping the details as anonymous as possible but Kaidou did mention a “he” at one point, it could’ve also been a typo, so immediately labeling Kaidou as crushing on a guy specifically couldn’t be 100% proven,bu-
Thinking harder about it, Saiki came to the conclusion that whoever it might be is none of his business, and stalking Kaidou like he did was already pretty invasive as is, so we don’t need psychic Holmes on the case to figure out the great unsolved case of Kaidou’s crush, whoever it might be either has the chance of being turned away by his chunnibyou, or he might tone it down a bit now-Regardless, it’s none of his business.
Today, he’ll make crappy snowmen with his friends, and forget about the whole crush thing anyways.
The thin layer of ice on the grass crunches under his shoes as he makes his way to his group of friends, the cold wind stings and stains all of their faces a tint red, Today, they’re all going to have a blissfully ignorant day,
Saiki thinks to himself, slipping on the geranium ring, uncaring of any petty issue that might come along with it. Winter is now the season of oblivion, he’s decided.