Work Text:
Sae closes the door behind him as he steps into his house and dusts his shoes off the carpet before taking them off and putting them to the side.
He turns on the lights, revealing his filthy face with eyes red and swollen.
It wasn’t often that he cried, it was never loud or messy either. Sae preferred to keep his feelings and emotions to himself, never will he wear it on his sleeve.
But perhaps it had gotten a little too close today. He did hug isagi for reasons he no longer remembered.
All Sae wanted to do now was rest. He was exhausted.
It’s weird. Rin didn’t even live in this house half his life yet it’s only now that Sae couldn’t feel his presence in it.
Maybe it’s the thought that now, there really was no chance for his little brother to come home. Maybe it’s the thought that he’s actually gone, like really gone. There was no way Sae could ever see him again.
Suppose that’s the difference between someone that’s almost dead and… Dead
Sae takes out the letter from Rin that was safely tucked inside his chest pocket.
He never was the type to follow rules.
“I want to go out and play football.” A young Sae, no more the age of 10, declared inside his younger brother’s hospital room.
His parents sat at both sides of his brother, reading aloud a storybook before they were interrupted by their older son’s proposal.
Their mother spoke first.
“Don’t be insensitive, Sae. You should stay with Rin, we’ll be leaving soon.”
Sae clicks his tongue. “It’s not like he’s going anywhere. He’s stuck in bed.”
“Sae! A good older brother should be caring!”
“I’m always caring.”
“That’s enough.” Their father chimed in. “You can’t play now anyway. It’s snowing.”
It was then Rin spoke. Rin rarely spoke and he was only shut quieter when he was diagnosed with his illness.
But now, he was speaking.
For Sae.
“I want to play with nii-chan.” Rin made all heads turn to him, getting everyone’s attention. To Sae, that was expected. Rin always got their parent’s attention.
Rin’s spoiled. At least to Sae. The response from their mother only pushes that belief. “Absolutely not! You are much too frail-.. Rin!”
She hadn’t even finished speaking by the time Rin was up and about and tugging at his big brother’s hand.
Sae remembered his eyes being filled with so much admiration and hope that he’d felt he had no choice but to pull him along and run away from their parents.
“Don’t cry when you’re back and we’re no longer here!” They both ignored the shouting from their father.
The two brothers trudged along the snow together, stuck like glue. Though that is the choice of only one of them.
The other isn’t so pleased.
“Stop hugging my arm, Rin.” Sae says impassively, not letting his annoyance show.
Rin only weakly shakes his head with a sneeze. Sae takes a deep breath, kneels, and opts to wipe Rin’s snot with his jacket sleeve.
Ever the great brother he is.
“You can come with me but you can’t play.” Sae stands up, looking down at his brother who’s only a few inches shorter.
“And don’t hug my arm. Let’s just hold hands, okay?”
Rin nods before suddenly frowning at one of Sae’s conditions. “I want to play.”
“You can’t. You’re weak.”
“Please..nii-chan.” Rin coughs but immediately straightens up. “Christmas is in 2 days..it can be your gift.. to me..?”
Sae would never admit that inside his heart, there exists a soft spot for his little brother. How could the he say no when he misses playing footy with his kid brother too?
“Okay, fine! Only a little.”
Upon seeing Rin smile, Sae turns around with joy in his heart despite his grim face. What he doesn’t know, however, is there’s a certain kid behind him that’s now holding a snowball aimed at his head.
It was too late. It already hit Sae.
Rin laughs heartily and ends up also failing to dodge the counter attack from his older brother.
Their snowball fight started from there.
And just the day after, right on Christmas eve, Rin’s health further worsened and he ended up in a critical state.
Without their parents, Sae had to care for him on his own. It was that day Sae realized how fragile his brother really was.
Sae stopped envying Rin that day. He wanted to make Rin so happy that he’d never be sick or ill again.
So that maybe, one day, they can go back to playing football.
One day.
“If someone throws a snowball at me ONE MORE TIME, i won’t be so nice anymore!”
The laughter of Isagi’s (adopted) children made Sae feel warmer than any of his coats and scarves.
According to Isagi, They’re all biological siblings but they were all also severely neglected and mistreated by the orphanage they came from.
Their ages ranged from 6 to 11. Poor children did not even have names until Isagi and Bachira decided to take them in.
Another snowball hit Sae on the shoulder.
The oldest, named ‘Lynn’ by Isagi, circled Sae. His brown hair and green eyes stood out against the snow. “Ooooohh Uncle Sae is sooo scary!”
“The scarieeeesst!”
Ruka—Isagi’s youngest—followed the words of her older brother whom she looked identical to with an equally taunting laughter.
Sae was surprisingly chuckling along. How long has it been since he’s felt this lighthearted? Possibly never until now.
“That’s wrong!” Shidou declares from a few feet away, holding the third child, Rui, who preferred to stay silent and give no comment. He looked the most different out of all his siblings with his black hair and blue eyes.
“I, Shidou, am the scariest!!!”
Sae couldn’t help but scoff amidst the children’s cackles at his childish lover. Sometimes he’d ponder why he fell in love with this demon at all.
He knows the answer lies in the nights where Shidou reveals his true, real, and vulnerable self to him.
In the middle of the chaos, a child clears her throat. The second child, Izumi. Brown hair, blue eyes. “Yoichi is scarier than you, you loser npc!”
“I’m scary?” Isagi finally comes out with his husband, Bachira right beside him.
Their children immediately runs up to them yelling their names, as expected, and cling on like little monkeys on tree branches.
Seems like they might need to warm up a little more before they switch to callings like “Dad” or “Papa”
“How’s everyone? Sae? Shidou?”
“Perfect!” Shidou answers as he’s letting down Rui who was very much late to the family embrace.
Sae simply nods with a small smile.
“Dad, can we watch Frozen, please?” Ruka pleads. Her request is agreed upon by Rui.
“I want to sing ‘For the first time in forever’”
Bachira laughs. “We can sing it right now!”
“Not now! Guys, It’s time to open presents!” Isagi cheerfully announced. He then looks over at Sae and starts to approach him as Bachira and Shidou push the enthusiastic kids inside.
“Sae.” Isagi hands him a box. “Glad to see you back home from Madrid.”
“It’s just.. an extra gift. Your actual one is inside.”
“Thank you?” Sae’s face becomes indifferent once again. Isagi almost feels grateful, he definitely prefers the sight since it’s whats he’s more used to when it comes to Sae.
“What’s the extra gift for?
“Open it.” And so Sae does.
Inside lay a small seagull plush toy. While Sae likes seagulls, he believes he’s far too old for such gifts… but Isagi keeps looking expectant.
That’s when he sees the button on the seagull’s neck.
“Hey, you.”
The voice that came out with the button being pressed almost made Sae jump and drop the toy.
His heart started thumping.
“I remembered i had a sound file of Rin’s voice from his gift to me before and i thought to make a copy for you.”
Isagi boops the Seagull on its beak. “Cute, isn’t it? I thought you might be forgetting his voice so—“
“I have.”
Sae will firmly argue that the pink on his nose and the trembling of his bottom lip is from the cold winter air.
“Thank you.”
“Merry christmas, Sae.”
Isagi and Sae sat on a couch inside the warmth of Bachira’s house. The kids—with an exception of the second child—sat on the floor singing karaoke.
Meanwhile, Sae was busy with his extra gift.
“Oh my god he sounds like an idiot. What’s wrong with my brother?” Isagi laughs.
“What do you mean? He sounds adorable! It makes you miss him a little too much... so much.”
Sae only gives him a weird look before sitting the seagull toy down beside him on the couch. That was a shock for sure.
Both Isagi’s gift and his words.
It was then a loud thud sounded from the other room, followed by Shidou’s apologetic voice.
“Whoops! Sorry bout that! Zuzu made your owl on the shelf fall!”
“Hey! That was you, Antennaed freak!”
Lynn, being the oldest and most mature, shouts back. “Don’t curse, Izumi! Even if it’s Uncle Shidou!”