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Dear Charlotte,
How are you, little sister? I am sorry that I didn't write to you for a week. Here, in the Milverton Manor, things recently turned upside down. And this time, it wasn't even me who was behind it nor one of my boyfriends, because I didn't even have time to go on a date. But I can assure you with relief that I am still alive even if I have a few new scratches I didn't have before.
But let me tell you this story from the start. I am certain that you will find it entertaining and it will be hard to hold back your laughter... if you can even do that.
Master Milverton and his secretary, Mr. Ruskin - I can't stop realizing that they would make a perfect couple... if they are not that already, obviously, without them knowing about it. Master Milverton is not someone who would be skilled in the topic of romance, after all. Where was I? Yes. So Master Milverton and Mr. Ruskin was planning a three-day business trip or something like that, to Birmingham. The manor turned crazy before they even left and the linen-room supervisor, Cindy's attempts to try to calm everyone down, were all unsuccessful. If the master would leave alone, we would have probably not even noticed that - it was Mr. Ruskin whose absence was equal to a catastrophe. Cindy likes thinking that she is the one who keeps this house together, but it is actually Mr. Ruskin. He is the one who decides the daily schedule of everyone, he is the one who gives the praise or the necessary scolding, whether Master Milverton got everything Mr. Ruskin thinks that he needs or not. Mr. Ruskin is basically the supporting pillar of the manor and our strength and will - without his advice and orders, everyone felt lost even before he stepped out of the house. Mr. Ruskin took some time to solve the problems in advance and gave a detailed list to Cindy about what we should do while they are away and how to contact him if something unsolvable arises - like, what happened last summer with that plumbing incident when the water almost flooded Master Milverton's beautiful garden. I thought that this was it and they would leave, but before that, Cindy mentioned that Mr. Ruskin wanted to talk to me as well in private.
You can't even imagine how surprised I was! That Mr. Ruskin wants to talk to me when no one else will hear it! I was secretly hoping that he would ask dating advice from me about what to do with Master Milverton, but it turned out this was something else. I was slightly disappointed at first until I didn't hear what my task would be.
Taking care of Master Milverton's beloved cats.
I don't know if I told you about this before - if I didn't, then it's my shame - but Master Milverton obsessively loves cats. He keeps three at the house, their names are Strawberry - due to the master's fondness of strawberries - Charlotte - just like you (but based on the gossip, she got her name because Mr. Ruskin couldn't name the cat Charles - see, he is a hopeless romantic) - and Lily. Usually, it is Mr. Ruskin who takes care of them, but of course, if he is not here, he can't do that. So the trusted job of keeping the master's cats safe was passed onto me.
It was an honor I tried to grow up to and be the responsible person Mr. Ruskin wanted - or rather, threatened to see me - but it was also true that I didn't take care of cats before. Remember, we always had dogs at home. Cats, while they are similarly adorable, are completely different creatures. In these few days, I had enough time to learn it.
I thought that I can handle cats, so I didn't tell Mr. Ruskin that he should ask someone else. I wanted to earn his trust (in hope that I will get more serious tasks in the future, like getting him a bouquet of flowers he can give to Master Milverton). But all I can say is that cats are bigger trouble than you would ever expect. Let's see it in list.
Cats love, and I mean, LOVE tossing things down and it doesn't stop them if said things turn out to be expensive. It includes Master Milverton's books or the vases from the windowsill, plates or even the door knob. You need to believe me when I say that I have no idea how Lily managed to pull off the door knob of Mr. Ruskin's bedroom. Cindy gave me a harsh scolding for it and tried to repair it herself, but ever since then, it is hard to open that door. It is strange that Mr. Ruskin didn't scold me for it yet. (Could this mean that he actually sleeps in Master Milverton's bedroom?)
The second thing that cats love tearing everything they got their claws on, away. Like kitchen rags, clothes and curtains. I knew about the first well, the chef's constant complaint is that the cats destroy all his usable kitchen rags - but the latter two were like a cold shower. Strawberry tore my second favourite dress away when I picked her up! It took hours until I finally sewed all the holes together. And I didn't even speak about the curtains yet. The curtains in Master Milverton's study are a catastrophe. I tried to keep the cats away from that room, but I was unaware that Charlotte can open doors. Before I could realize, they tore Master Milverton's curtains to tiny pieces. Did you know that for some reason, cats are obsessed with curtains? I was afraid to tell Cindy what happened - rightfully. I got a scolding again, but at least she helped me change the curtains. We silently agreed that it will be our secret and Mr. Ruskin will never learn about it. I probably wouldn't survive.
Cats are also determined to not let you sleep. For the whole night. It was a mistake to take them to my room, but I wanted to watch over them and this seemed to be the best option for it. It turned out this was the worst I could do for my sanity. Even if two of them were sleeping, the third one was jumping around in the room, mewing loudly. Into my ear, on my chest and she even played with my hair because she thought that it was some kind of toy! This was when I got the mentioned scratches. I guess that after you heard about this, it is not surprising for you if I tell you that I slept like three hours on those nights while I needed to supervise Master Milverton's cats and by the time they came back to the manor, I was really worn out.
Mr. Ruskin must have seen that I was barely alive and he just thanked me and sent me to rest. I was so tired that I didn't even realize it at first that I got a compliment from him, but when I did, it was enormous joy. I think I added something so he and Master Milverton can spend time together without needing to worry for their cats - whatever they actually did in Birmingham.
This is how my adventure with the cats came to its end. I swear to you, Charlotte, that it was an unrepeatable experience I am unsure I ever want to go through again. At least, it is finally over.
Lot of tired hugs from your sister, Agatha
P.S: don't read this letter aloud to Mother and Father.